IV

---

 

 

The weather had been erratic lately. One moment it’s very hot, the next it’s raining. Kyungsoo could hear the heavy downfall of water outside. Kyungsoo hoped that it would stop soon. Jongin had his head on his closet looking for a change of clothes for him. Kyungsoo was standing awkwardly in the middle of the room.

Kyungsoo did not expect Jongin’s room to be so clean. He expected him to be the ‘messy room’ kind, so Kyungsoo apologized on his head for judging him. It has a single bed in the middle of the room with dark blue sheets on. It’s big enough to fit two people. Kyungsoo wondered if he would sleep there. Would they sleep together? Heck no, Jongin would not allow that. He does not like him and he was already kind enough to have him in his room and lend him comfortable clothes to sleep on.

“Uhh..here’s my shirt and my pants. You could change in my bathroom?” Jongin was rubbing his nape, avoiding looking at him. Maybe Jongin felt kind of guilty that he said he doesn’t like him? Kyungsoo decided not to push the matter. He said what he said, and he’s being kind now. He should just focus on that.

“Thanks” Kyungsoo said. Jongin nodded, still not meeting his gaze. There was a tentative pause and the air stilled. They looked at each other.

“I. Uhhh- I have some homework to do” Jongin pointed awkwardly on his table. “I-yeahh..”

Kyungsoo decided not to prolong Jongin’s agony, so he nodded and went to the bathroom.

He undressed and hanged his used clothing on the bathe rack then hanging Jongin’s clothes to the other side. He removed his glasses and placed it near the sink. He adjusted the water to the right amount of heat, when the hot water came into contact with his tired skin. It felt good.

 

After the bath, Kyungsoo shuffled to fit Jongin’s attire. It was bigger than him, the collar revealing his milky collarbone. The pants have garters, thankfully. Why must Jongin be so tall?

“Ummm..I’m done.” Kyungsoo said coming out from the bathroom. The steam followed him. Kyungsoo’s hair was still damp.  Jongin did not even bother to look at him. Kyungsoo has half the mind to talk to Jongin and be direct with him again to ask why he doesn’t like him, but he figured that that would not be a good idea for now.

Kyungsoo scanned the room. There’s no sofa there for him to sleep on, and there’s only the cold hard floor. He wouldn’t want to intrude and sleep on Jongin’s bed. He also wouldn’t want to bother Jinwoo and he was not allowed to go to Sohyun’s room.

 

“Do you keep a sleeping mat?” Kyungsoo asked.

 

Jongin shook his head, still not looking at him.

 

“Where am I supposed to sleep them?” Kyungsoo was controlling his nerves.

 

This time, Jongin did look at him. He could see him looking at him from head to toes. Kyungsoo was uncomfortable being scrutinized. He brought his right hand to his left elbow.

 

“You’re so small, aren’t you?” Jongin stared at him. Kyungsoo had to bite his tongue. “You can sleep there on my bed.”

 

Kyungsoo blinked.

 

“But what about you?”

 

“I can also sleep there. My bed is wide.”

 

True, Jongin has a wide bed. Kyungsoo shrugged. He’d rather not want to drag this topic. He was tired already. He flopped down to the bed. Outside, the rain was still heavy. Kyungsoo inhaled, the bed smells like Jongin. It smells good, Kyungsoo decided. It has a faint smell of cinnamon and mint. He looked at the elder to see that he was still looking at him.

 

Jongin quickly snapped his stare away from him. Kyungsoo pretended he had not noticed.

 

“Ummm…on second thought, I’m just gonna sleep on the sofa outside.” Jongin coughed. He’s now back to avoiding his gaze away from him. Jongin grabbed a pillow and went outside, not looking back.

 

Kyungsoo would feel bad if he wasn’t already so tired. He stayed still, the bed feel so comfortable.

 

There was a flash outside and then a loud thunder ensued.

 

 

+++

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

 

That was his only chance of sleeping on the same bed with Kyungsoo and he blew it. He could even talk it out to Kyungsoo so that they could fix their relationship, but hormones got the best of him. He heard Kyungsoo taking a bath earlier.  Imagining the younger on his bathroom while washing his body with his soap is already taking Jongin’s imagination to not-so-uncharted territory.

 

He then went out all y wearing his shirt. If Jongin didn’t know any better, he would say that Kyungsoo was seducing him. Why must Kyungsoo look so good wearing his shirt? It looked so big on him but it hugged the younger’s form on the right places, and the collar was revealing more skin that what Jongin could handle.  He could not trust himself and he still needed to avoid Kyungsoo, and he sleeping together with him would not help anything.

 

Jongin decided that what he did was for the best. Sohyun was still his sister and Kyungsoo is her boyfriend whether he likes it or not. T here is a line between him and Kyungsoo that he should not cross, he kept reminding himself.

 

The rain was loud. Aside from the heavy downpour, there were now loud thunders. A light switched on upstairs. Jongin assumed it was Jinwoo getting thirsty, but then he saw Kyungsoo. Jongin wondered why he went down. He got up from the couch using his elbow to support him. Kyungsoo did not budge, he just stranded there in the dark looking at him.

A zap of light flashes outside. Even if it’s dark, Jongin could see Kyungsoo’s eyes enlarging. The younger then runs towards him with both hands closing his ears. Kyungsoo face falls on Jongin’s stomach when the loud thunder roared.

 

Oh, Jongin got it.

 

Kyungsoo was afraid of thunder.

 

Jongin didn’t know what to say or what he’s allowed to do. They weren’t exactly friends, but it’s clear to Jongin that he needed to comfort the younger to ease his fear. Jongin’s hand s to Kyungsoo’s hair. He patted tentatively. Kyungsoo whimpered but he then nuzzled to Jongin’s shirt.

 

Jongin smiled, he took it as a good sign.

 

“You don’t need to be afraid. You could sleep here with me if you want?”

 

He could feel Kyungsoo nodding under him. Kyungsoo lowered his hold to Kyungsoo’s nape, slightly massaging the strip of skin there. Kyungsoo stared up at him. His eyes were large and is welling up with tears. Jongin hadn’t seen Kyungsoo without his glasses before. He has long lashes, longer than Sohyun’s.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m not usually like this” The younger said.

 

“It’s okay, we’re all afraid of something.”

 

“Yeah, but you hate me, and look what I’m doing bothering your sleep. You would hate me even more.”

 

“I’m sorry, Kyungsoo. I was not in the right mind earlier. I don’t hate you, I was just not in a good mood, and I took it out on you.”

 

“Sure.” Kyungsoo said. Jongin did not feel any hint of sarcasm when Kyungsoo said it. Jongin was about to suggest they should go back up to sleep on the much more comfortable bed, but Kyungsoo already got on the couch, squeezing on the small space into him. The rained was still strong.

 

Jongin placed a hand on Kyungsoo, patting it until they were both asleep.

 

 

 

+++

Kyungsoo was embarrassed.

 

The next day, it was Sohyun who woke them up on the couch. She was eyeing how close he and Jongin were, but she did not voice it out. His back ached, but it was a good sleep. There were some stretch marks on his face caused by the crease of the couch.

 

Sohyun smiled at her, Kyungsoo smiled back and was about to greet her good morning when Jongin pulled him back to the couch and freaking hugged him. “You’re such a comfortable pillow, Soo”

 

Kyungsoo was really embarrassed.

 

“….and here I thought he doesn’t like you.” Sohyun said almost in a whisper. Her eyes lingered to the two of them before going to the kitchen. Kyungsoo could hear the clanking of kitchenware. It looks like Jinwoo was awake already, preparing their breakfast. Kyungsoo had to pry away Jongin’s hold on him. He was still half asleep, but he does not want to let go of him.

 

“Jongin, wake up.” Kyungsoo said exasperated. When Jongin bleats with eyes still closed while hugging his right arm, Kyungsoo rolled his eyes and flicked a finger to Jongin’s forehead.

 

“Ouch!” Jongin rubbed the place where he was hit. His eyes fluttered open to look up at him. “Good morning to you too.”

 

“You’re such a kid.”

 

“I’m your hyung. Come to think of it, you don’t call me hyung.”

 

Kyungsoo rolled his eyes again.

 

“I would never call you that.”

 

Jongin did not reply, he just looked at him.  Kyungsoo felt uncomfortable, remembering what transpired the night before.  Whenever there was thunder when he was younger, he would go to Seungsoo’s room and his brother would comfort him to sleep. When he got older, he got more hesitant to his brother. He did not want him to view him as weak, so he just swallowed his fear and forced himself to not get bothered with the roaring sound as he will himself to sleep. He could not.

 

But last night though, Jongin was there. He owed him gratitude.

 

“T-thank you.”

 

Their eyes met.

 

“its okay, Kyungsoo. That’s the least I could do for saying I don’t like you yesterday which is completely untrue by the way.”

 

The two smiled together.

 

“So are we friends?” The elder asked.

 

Kyungsoo nodded, patting Jongin’s shoulder who was still sitting.

 

They did not noticed Jinwoo standing near the door.  He cleared his throat, looking at the two of them.

 

“I hate to bother your moment, but breakfast is ready.”