Chapter 3

Is this love?

It's time to say goodbye.  Jennie doesn't want to drag this out, she wants to say goodbye to Jisoo, Taeyong, Mino and Irene; make some false promises and be on her merry way.  Every minute she stays around these people she feels as though she's suffocating. Hanbin's face hasn't left her mind, not since the cafeteria incident. Funnily enough, Jaehyun's face hasn't left her mind either. Jennie wonders if he's doing okay in America; he had left two days after their "talk". He had only said a proper goodbye to Yuta, a beautiful Japanese transfer student who he liked to hang out with. 

Yuta had always been a funny character in Jennie's eyes, he seemed to always follow her around with her eyes yet made no move to approach her. He avoided talking to her yet helped her with anything small or big. Jennie had at one point tried to get closer to him after listening to Jisoo's advice, however, he had just pushed her away. Jennie understood him so she left him alone, opting to think of him as just a friendly acquaintance. She didn't want to think of him as something more, she didn't trust herself to get attached to him. He reminded her too much of Kwon Jiyong, who she had met when she had been seven. She used to like to imagine him as her guardian angel, her older brother who would protect her from everything. Jennie hasn't seen or heard from him since the age of fourteen. She doesn't know if he's dead or alive, doesn't know if he still remembers her or has forgotten. 

In Jaehyun's last day of school which only Yuta and Jennie were aware of, Jennie had met his eyes when the bell had rung for the end of school. Jaehyun had given her a small nod and a smile that had taken her breath away. It had left Jennie wondering if she looked the same as him, beautiful yet with a pain so raw, no matter how blinding his smile was, the pain wasn't hidden. She had turned away when Lalisa had grabbed onto her arm squealing "Unnie" into her ears. When Jennie had turned back to look at Jaehyun, he had already left. That day, after school Jennie smoked two packs of cigarettes with Yuta in his tiny apartment. She didn't know why she had sought out Yuta, but it had turned out that way. They had sat in silence, Yuta diligently smoking and drinking his troubles away while Jennie had opted to just smoke. After drinking half a bottle of whiskey, Yuta had suddenly gotten a hold of her, crying and begging her to call him "onii chan".  By the time, Yuta falls asleep, Jennie's voice is hoarse from calling him "onii chan" over and over again.  The next week at school, everyone seems to be talking about the disappearance of Jaehyun and Yuta. 

When Jennie buys her ticket to New Zealand, she finds the courage to approach Jisoo. Jisoo takes one look at her face before Jennie is being pulled to an empty classroom. Jennie tells Jisoo that she's leaving, it hurts too much to stay. Jennie tells Jisoo about her crush on Hanbin since she was thirteen, how she has been pining after him.  Jennie reveals to Jisoo how she has been feeling about Hanbin, about Lisa and about how they got together. When Jennie has finished with her story, the classroom is quiet for a long time. Jennie can't find it in herself to speak or to look Jisoo in the eyes, she's staring out the window, looking at the clear sky. When Jisoo does speak it's harsh and cutting and leaves Jennie feeling worse than she has ever felt.

"God, you're damn selfish arent you, Nini?" Jisoo scoffs twisted furiously.  Jennie doesn't say anything, just clenches her fist until her nails are digging into her palms. 

"Hanbin and Lisa are happy. Happy in love. They understand each other, trust each other, support and care for each other, and you're jealous?"  Jisoo's voice is rising in volume and Jennie's not sure what to do. Her eyes are staring blankly at the floor, her body heating up and the familiar feeling of hatred towards herself bubbling up.  Jisoo grabs her chin between her fingers before forcing Jennie to meet her eyes. 

"Do you know how selfish, how dramatic you sound?" Jisoo continues. "I understand that you had a crush on him when you were younger, but how could you do this to Lisa?" 
"How could you do this to someone who considered you a close friend of theirs, someone who loved and respected you? If you had any self-respect, any positive feelings for her at all, you would have never even thought of saying this out loud". Jisoo stopped to take a sharp breath.

"Do you know how you can ruin their new relationship just because of your dramatics Jennie, do you? Instead of feeling happy for them, you're complaining to me about your love for Hanbin by completely disregarding their love for each other " Jisoo screeched shaking Jennie by the shoulders. 

Jennie was baffled. She had never imagined Jisoo to react like this. Tears were b in her eyes as she bit her lips to muffle her sobs. Just as Jisoo grabbed her face again, the door to the classroom swung open.  Jennie let out a sob, tears finally running down her face. She heard the sharp sound of heels clicking on the floor as whoever it was made their way across to Jennie and Jisoo.  Jennie raised her head, ready to take this opportunity and run only to bump into Irene. 

The look on Irene's face is frightening, her eyes sparkling with anger her lips twisted into a sharp smile. Irene looks at Jennie, her eyes taking in Jennie's obvious sadness and tears. Before anyone is aware of what is going on, Irene slaps Jisoo across her face. Jennie is just as shocked as Jisoo who stands frozen gazing at  Irene in fear and confusion. Irene slaps Jisoo again. Jisoo's cheeks have started to colour as Irene's palm print have started to form. Irene raises her hands for the third strike when Jennie grabs onto her, hysterical and scared. Irene stills before proclaiming Jisoo "a waste of space" and someone to 'always be hated" before dragging Jennie away. 

When they reach the rooftop, Irene doesn't look at Jennie. However, she calmly tells Jennie how much she hates Jisoo. Irene tells Jennie, how she had similarly approached Jisoo and shared her problems only to be met with the same sort of behaviour. Jisoo had laughed at her, at her problems and made her out to be an ungrateful drama queen who sought nothing but compliments for her looks. 

Irene then had gone into details about her life, but the poor financial state of their family and how they had been in a state where they would be struggling to buy something as small as tissue boxes.  Irene then tells her how this was the start of her modelling career as a six-year-old. She had appeared in ads and TV just so she could help her family eat. Her looks were her biggest weapon, but it was also the thing Irene resented the most. Her looks were the reason why she was being used day after day, the reason why she was hated by her sisters and the only reason why her parents paid attention to her. Her lack of self- confidence and self-worth as well as self-hatred all stemmed from being used only for her beauty.  She further continues about the reason why Jisoo was going around undermining everyone else's problems were due to the fact that she was never brave or strong enough to tackle her own problems. Jisoo's habit of hiding from her problems and forcing them to become insignificant to her had also leas for her to adopt the same strategy when tackling other's problem.

Abruptly, Irene stops.  She looks at Jennie once again, and the fierce person Jennie had seen moments ago is replaced by a sad girl who is struggling to love herself.  Irene tells Jennie she's leaving for Japan and it's good Jennie is leaving too. Irene then gives Jennie one last time before she too walks away and Jennie is left in the school rooftop. 

Jennie decides she isn't strong enough to say her goodbyes to Taeyong and Mino.  She leaves without informing anyone, the knowledge of Irene leaving another secret that she takes with her.  When she reaches New Zealand, there are hundreds of messages from Taeyong, Mino, Jinwoo, the rest of Mino's groups and even Lalisa. She doesn't answer any however she reads them all. Everyone's curious about her whereabouts. The abrupt departure of Jaehyun, Yuta and now Jennie and Irene has created many rumours about them. From the messages she read, Jennie understands that the school believes those who left all had a story that connected to each other. 

A thousand miles away, Jennie scoffs surprised that Jisoo had decided not to tell anyone the real reason why Jennie left. Jennie shakes her head, once again feeling drained before she decides to completely restart her phone before she throws it away in the bin. Jennie is finally free and away from the pain, completely in ease knowing that Irene; the only person she cared about was also free and away. 

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mp_a22
I have so much more to write and although this chapter doesn’t have anything that I originally planned to out in, I’m not too mad at it. So anyways, enjoy and stay safe everyone!

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jtw_10 #1
Chapter 8: Well damn
_6639_
#2
Chapter 8: You updatedit jsjsjsjs I'm crying
potatoface7894
#3
Chapter 8: Holly , u finally updated! What a nice surprise! I felt this chapter so short tho :( I guess I'm a needy hoe, not sorry. Anyways, I loved when Jennie and Jaehyun laughed cutely together AND the final scene! , how much more inconvenient could this be? Can't wait for the next chapter! Keep going!
_6639_
#4
Chapter 5: ♡♡
_6639_
#5
Chapter 7: I love thisssss its soo good
potatoface7894
#6
Chapter 7: OMG I'm so in love with this story!! God, I can't wait for the next chapter! The plot and character development is truly amazing, as well as your writing style. Like seriously, u literally made me hate Jisoo. And let me tell ya, I've never been into this Jennie-Jaehyun ship... but DAMN, I'm strongly buying it right now. Love them together. Update soon plz!
kpopcanuck #7
Chapter 7: Damn I wanna give Jisoo a slap after the end of that chapter lol. I hope everything turns out alright for Jennie and Jaehyun here. And the way you describe the almost unhealthy closeness between Jennie, Jaehyun, Taeyong, and Irene is so interesting as well.
KIMHYUNAssi #8
Chapter 6: Uuu yes please to the bonus update of jennie x taeyong!! Hahaha XD
KIMHYUNAssi #9
Chapter 5: GOD THIS STORY IS GOLD!! You write their emotion perfectly and everything is so intense and i love it!! Keep updating authornim!! Fighting!!<33
Jenniejaehyun
#10
Chapter 5: I LOVE IT. EVERYTHING IS JUST SO INTENSE. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT UPDATE ASSDFGHHJKLL