He awoke with a start and the first sharp intake of breath burnt in his chest.
Something was on his face but his arms were so heavy, he could not lift them to check. There was a strange sound, constant. It was familiar and it made him uneasy. He knew that sound and it meant nothing good. When his eyes got used to the bright light, he saw that he was however not in the room he expected to be in. He was lying on a soft bed, his arms were not cuffed to the bed but there was a needle in his arm. There were voices and when he turned his head, he saw a screen. It showed a video of a woman in red clothes, talking in front of a building. There were short clips of a huge crowd screaming and protesting, they were holding signs. Then they showed pictures. His breath hitched and his chest hurt worse.

“Can you turn up the volume?” someone asked nearby.

“…still ongoing. The governor has yet to decide on how to tackle the recent publication of the biggest secret the government had been keeping from the citizens. He has not released an official statement about the project of the so-called Aureum Luscus, the golden eyed mutated young people. But it seems that there are several laws in preparation in regard to their legal status and protection. Do Kyungsoo, ex-Lieutenant of a small town north east to the city, whose trial is taking place right now, has been accused of murder, plotting of murder and complicity to murder, as well as releasing secret government documents and supporting the break-in of the Aureum Luscus into the city. Further he has been accused of aggravated assault. The list of crimes is long, but to the people of the city this man is a hero. He has sacrificed everything as he freed an Aureum Luscus that had been held captive in his town, joined a group of them and helped freeing more from the three camps located in the desert. He made it into the city and could have started a new and safe life but he did not abandon his new friends and helped to expose the truth to us”, the woman in red was saying.

There were two young women standing close to the screen, they were wearing pale blue clothes. “He is so handsome, isn’t he?” one of them giggled. The other female turned towards the man lying on the bed next to him, it was blocked by a curtain.
“You should sleep a little bit, Mr Byun. You have been watching TV all day. You should not be agitated or your wound may open up again”, she said kindly.
“But I need to know whether Kyungsoo will be cleared! They already stripped him of his title and put him into prison!” the young man called.
Then the two noticed him staring, one of the females made a step back and pulled the curtain with her and exposed the agitated young man in the bed next to him.
“I mean I am shocked, too and I think they deserve justice but I cannot get used to their eyes”, the other woman whispered.
“He can hear and understand you!” Mr Byun said angrily. Then he smiled brightly.
“I’m Baekhyun. What’s your name? Do you know Kyungsoo? You kept staring at his picture”, Baekhyun said.
His throat was dry and hurt when he opened his lips no sound came out.
“Oh dear, don’t strain yourself”. A third woman in pale blue called as she hurried over. “You have visitors but I should really not let them see you in this state”, she said to him as she pulled the curtains back and blocked the other women and the young man from his sight.
“But he is also an Aureum Luscus, maybe you know him? He showed me a picture of you and said he was looking for you”, the third woman said kindly.
His heart was racing in his hurting chest. Who could it be?

But it were two young men that entered the large room, he was lying in. One had broad shoulders and the shirt he was wearing lay tight over his muscular upper body, his yellow eyes were scanning the room carefully. He was accompanied by a tall man with brown eyes who headed straight to the bed without looking at anything in the room. His heart slowed down.
“Jongin!” Minseok and Jongdae hurried to the bed. “You had us worried. We have been looking for you all over the city. The others told us you died at camp two!” Jongdae whispered. “Have you just woken up? I guess you want to be filled in then. The news don’t bring all the details”, Minseok said and leaned closer.
“Junmyeon betrayed us and ran for it as soon as he learnt that his grandfather was the original creator of the whole project. He joined his grandfather in the science team. Kyungsoo followed him and let us in. After Kyu and I got inside, Kenta manage to take control over their security system and let everyone else in. We went to Junmyeon’s grandfather’s house and Kyu killed him. We got all arrested but I think because the citizens got really upset after seeing clips of the camps and what they’ve done, most of us were cleared of breaking into the city. Since we killed no one in the city, we got cleared very quickly. What happened at the camps is being hushed up so far. Kyungsoo however… he has a long list of things he’s done and he is not one of us, so he doesn’t get a special treatment. They cannot punish us because of everything they’ve already done to us. Well, they all love Kyungsoo so he might receive a fairly small punishment. Huh? Yeah, Junmyeon’s grandfather had a close friendship with the governor so he could pull it all off and could keep everything a secret. We haven’t found out who the Feng group is but before we went in, Kyu mentioned that she thinks it would be some people in high positions. We have to keep a low profile for now however, we are waiting until everyone has been cleared. We need to reorganise and make a plan. Now Junmyeon has taken over his grandfather’s position and has been appointed the official advisor role for the governor. He was not prosecuted in any way, he wasn’t even accused of a crime. Now it is said that he has put pressure on the governor to introduce laws to protect us and to compensate for everything that happened to us. He announced the closure of all three camps and he was the one to make the governor end the situation at camp two. Some said he went personally to close camp two”, Minseok whispered so quietly that even Jongdae could hardly hear him.

Jongin barely managed to nod. He opened his lips but could not say a word. “He really was there? Did you see him?” Minseok asked surprise.
Jongin nodded again and closed his eyes because the pain was searing through his head.
“Was it him who brought you here?” Jongdae asked. Jongin did not answer.
“Kyungsoo was so sure that Junmyeon had betrayed us completely and abandoned every one of you. They had a massive fall out and man, I can understand it. Junmyeon has an incredible position now, he owns this massive house and he has great power. But for all we know is that after he let the camps close three days ago and before that, he was locked in at his house and did not talk to anyone. Eric, one of the staff, said he had been doing that even before that the entire time. It seems he is still working on something so I cannot be sure whether he is to be trusted”, Jongdae said.
Jongin tried to ask something but he could not say anything and he could not raise his hands to indicate anything. But Minseok understood from reading his lips.
“Kyu? She – she was really sick, no one really knew. She collapsed after killing Junmyeon’s grandfather. And we haven’t seen her since then but I think she is dead”, Minseok said. “Anyways, we’re still looking for Sean. He might be able to treat you with his medicine better than they can do here”, Jongdae added.
“We’ll come and visit you again tomorrow and bring you news, okay? Also we’ve heard that Kyungsoo’s trial is supposed to come to an end tonight. They’re ready to announce the decision in the next few hours”, he said then. Jongin simply blinked to show that he had understood, he could not even nod anymore.

Jongdae opened the curtain and they walked out. When they had left the hospital, they sat down outside in the small park.
“We should go and pick up Kyungsoo, shouldn’t we?” Jongdae asked. Minseok nodded absently. “He looked bad”, Jongdae muttered then.
“Bad? He looks more dead than alive”, Minseok hissed. “I don’t know what they’re doing in there but it is not good enough. We need Sean, he can fix Jongin”.
Jongdae nodded. “Then let’s go to the court and don’t tell Kyungsoo about Jongin just yet, okay?” Jongdae said.
“Why not? He’ll want to know that Jongin is alive”, Minseok said surprised as he got up. Jongdae bit his lip.
“What, you think he won’t make it through?” Minseok asked. Jongdae grabbed his arm.
“What do you think he’ll do when he sees Jongin like that?” Jongdae asked quietly. Minseok frowned.
“He is in love with Jongin. He will want to bring Kyu’s mission to an end and he’ll want to kill every member of the Feng group with his own hands. And I have the feeling he blames Junmyeon even though it was Junmyeon who got Jongin out of there”, Jongdae explained. Minseok looked puzzled.
“I don’t get it. If he likes him than he will be glad that he is alive, right?” Minseok asked. Jongdae sighed.
“Have you forgotten everything, I tried to teach you about human relationships?” he asked. Minseok’s face darkened.
“I tend to not think of my time at the camp so much, you know”, he said.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to –“, Jongdae quickly said. “Look, if it was you who had been wounded that badly, I would react like that. I would be beyond angry”, Jongdae said then quietly. “Really? You would run around to revenge me getting hurt?” Minseok asked and laughed. “I can hardly imagine that”.
Jongdae looked away. “Let’s go”, he said and walked ahead. Minseok quickly followed him. “Okay, what is it now?” Minseok asked.
“Why?” Jongdae asked still not looking at him. “I said something that upset you”, Minseok stated plainly.
“Maybe”, Jongdae said. “What about it was wrong?” Minseok asked. Jongdae shook his head.
“Doesn’t matter, I am not expecting anything else and I am used to it. You’ve always been like that”, Jongdae said.

Minseok grabbed his arm almost too hard and Jongdae was pushed against a wall. The street in front of the hospital was rather empty, only a few cars passing now and then.
“No, you have to tell me”, Minseok demanded grimly. “If you don’t break my arm”, Jongdae started. Minseok let go immediately.
“Jian already told you, so you should know”, Jongdae said angrily and looked away. “Jian? What did he say?” Minseok asked.
“You have fantastic memory, use it”, Jongdae said.
When he looked at Minseok, he saw how Minseok was eying him carefully, apparently thinking hard.
“He said a lot of things, I don’t know how that would relate to me saying something that would upset you”, Minseok said then.
“Minseok, you’re too close”, Jongdae murmured. “And I don’t really want to say it out loud now”, he added. Minseok looked confused.
“So then later?” he asked. “Yeah, if the timing is better”, Jongdae said vaguely and walked ahead. They had to climb up the steep side walk and he felt Minseok’s eyes on him for the next few minutes.

*

Kyungsoo was tired, he was so tired of it all. They had went through all the things he had done and it was a long list. He felt like it was a list of deeds for more than one life. He was a criminal after all.

“Mr Do”, the judge said. He looked up. “Yes?” he said exhausted.

“So far, we could follow all your actions and reasons for committing those deeds. But one thing still does not add up. Why did you kill the soldier in your hometown? It was no act of self-defence”, the judge said.
“I already told you, I had to free Jongin. They wanted to kill him and to get him out there”, Kyungsoo said.
“But you did not kill him in a fight, Mr Do. You shot him in the head”, the judge said.

It was very quiet in the room. Kyungsoo groaned exasperated. “He was holding Jongin so that I could kill him. They had ordered us to kill an Aureum Luscus after torturing him for fun! He was a trained soldier who had a weapon, I had no other choice!” Kyungsoo called. “I was standing there and he waited for me to kill Jongin. What would you have done?”
The thought of Jongin was still painful and he had to force himself everytime to say his name out loud.

At the first break during the trial, he had managed to catch snippets of conversations in the audience and between police men. It seemed like all camps had officially been closed down and the fights in camp two had been ended entirely. All Aureum Luscus that had still been at the camps had been brought to the city to be treated at a hospital. But he had no way to find out whether Jongin was amongst them. It had started back at his hometown when he had met Jongin and had first talked to him, watched him. And Junmyeon had told him that they had mistreated Jongin and he had just thought the only right thing to do was to free Jongin. He had not been able to think straight about any consequences. Then at the shelter, he had discovered how Jongin had meant much more to him than he had thought. It had taken him until Jongin had touched his face for the first time to realise what he felt for him. And it had been Junmyeon who had told him the reality so coldly into his face. He should have gone with Jongin’s group, he should have been at camp two. He should have done the same as Junmyeon, ditch the group to save the last one you had in your life to love. He felt like the entire weight of everything that had happened crushed down on him at once.

“Mr Do?”
He snapped out of his deep thoughts and realised that he was crying.

“It was the only right thing to do at that moment. I had to save him and I would do it over and over again. Not because I wanted to take someone else’s life, I’ve dreamt about this soldier night for night. I will never forget his face because he was just as much of a victim of the town’s brainwashing as I had been before that. But he – Jongin – he did not ask to be born the way he was, he has done nothing wrong and yet he was captured like an animal and caged in, tortured and sentenced to death. I won’t ever forget his face either, the way he looked at me when he realised that I wanted to help him and free him. These yellow-eyed people are not cold-hearted killing-machines, he was grateful and –“, Kyungsoo stopped.
He let his head drop down, he was fighting too much with his tears. - And I just want to see him one more time. He could not say that out loud.
The jury left to discuss and Kyungsoo was waiting in a small room. He buried his face in his knees and hoped no one looked at him because he could no longer hold it in anymore.
The jury took their time and it was already evening and turning dark when they all went back into the courtroom. Kyungsoo felt completely drained of every last bit of strength and emotion, he just stood there and thought, it didn’t even matter what punishment they would give him, he would accept it.

“The jury finds Mr Do Kyungsoo not guilty of all charges as they contributed to a greater good and were not committed out of malice. The defendant has shown clear remorse of the murder of the solider. Furthermore he has already spent time in prison”, the young man of the jury said.
The audience got excited and the judge had to call for order before he cleared Kyungsoo of all charges. Feeling a bit dizzy and confused, Kyungsoo was allowed to leave. He was not quite sure where to go but to his surprise someone was already waiting for him outside the court room.

“Jongdae! Minseok!” he called. Jongdae waved and smiled. “I did not expect you guys to – did you also have court trials?” Kyungsoo asked overwhelmed. Jongdae nodded.
“But ours were last week and we got cleared immediately. Well, Minseok had barely walked in and they cleared him”, Jongdae said.
“But I was sure they would clear you, too. Everyone is a big fan of you, wait until you get outside. A huge crowd awaits you”, Jongdae said.

The two filled in Kyungsoo on their way out. “Oh, by the way since you were staying with Junmyeon, you don’t have a place of your own to sleep, right?” Jongdae asked.
Kyungsoo nodded. “You can sleep over at my place”, Jongdae offered. “You have a place?” Kyungsoo asked.
Jongdae nodded. “Sure, I grew up in the city after all. The house is big enough for a couple of us to stay there. We’ve got already Kenta and Shaila staying there, there is enough room for you as well. Minseok and I won’t be home tonight anyways”, Jongdae said.
“Huh? Where are you going?” Kyungsoo asked.
“We’re still looking for a few people, you know. When Kenta opened the gate, many of us just ran into the city and we don’t know where they are. We’ve got about 3 left to find”, Jongdae explained.
Minseok looked strangely absent and reserved. Kyungsoo was glad that the two were accompanying him because Jongdae had been right, there was a huge crowd outside of the court. But he was also wrong in one point, not everyone was a fan. He saw a few signs that said: MURDERER!

Jongdae brought Kyungsoo to a small house close to the ocean. The building looked similar to Baekhyun’s home. A bit rough and narrow but on contrast to Baekhyun’s home, this place was not bright and warm. It looked just as rough inside, the wall’s paint was already cracking and the white was a pale grey. The floor was uneven and it looked rather dusty. But Kyungsoo guessed that no one had been taking care of the house during his absence. On the ground floor were a kitchen, a small bathroom and something like a living room, upstairs was a bedroom and a tiny broom cupboard. The living room was occupied by Kenta and Shaila. Shaila had been badly wounded but did not trust the doctors of the hospital and had freaked out. After various attempts of murdering the nurses, she had been brought to Jongdae’s house. Kenta was trying his best to keep her alive but she needed proper treatment. Sean was desperately needed and not only by Shaila. Kyungsoo wished he could have asked her about camp two but she was in no state to answer questions. Adding to that, Kyungsoo thought, if she was in that state in what state would Jongin be if he was alive?

The bedroom was also rather sparsely equipped, there was just a bed and a closet. The tiny broom cupboard was a storage room for weapons as Jongdae told him, however they had been confiscated during his absence as it seemed. Jongdae rolled out a futon on the floor.
“You can have the bed if you want, I can sleep on the futon later”, Jongdae said.
“And you?” Kyungsoo asked Minseok. Minseok shrugged. “I don’t need much sleep and then I can sleep on the floor”, he said.
Kyungsoo took a shower and just as he went upstairs he saw Jongdae and Minseok leaving. “Hey, wait a second”, Kyungsoo called.
“Could you – do me a favour?” Kyungsoo asked quietly. Minseok frowned. “What is it?”
Kyungsoo’s hand clenched around the wet towel. “Can I join you guys? I need to look for Jongin”, Kyungsoo said.
Jongdae clapped his shoulder. “You get some sleep first. We’re keeping our eyes open, okay? You should not go outside too soon as well. You’re a bit famous by now”, Jongdae said. Kyungsoo bit his lip but nodded.
When he got upstairs into bed, he decided to go outside tomorrow. He would go and see Junmyeon. If all it took in this city to take advantage of your connections, he would use it by all means.

*

“If I was a police officer and I simply had gotten my damn licence back this would be all so much easier”, Jongdae complained.
“Well, why not go and ask if you can have it back? Next to Kyungsoo, you are one of their heroes, aren’t you?” Minseok muttered.
They were climbing the steep street up the hill to the district where politicians and important people lived. Junmyeon’s house was close, too.
“It is not that easy”, Jongdae said wiped his forehead. It was late in the night but tonight was unusually hot for winter. “I am not important enough to make such demands”.

Minseok looked to the left where a handsome white house shone through the night. “I am sure Junmyeon has that sort of influence”, Minseok said.
“I am not going to ask that for anything!” Jongdae burst out. Minseok frowned slightly.
“Maybe I should. Or I could go in and demand it in exchange for not telling the city that their new favourite up and coming governor was involved in that experiments”, Jongdae growled.
“You were, too”, Minseok said simply. Jongdae stopped.
They had reached the top of the street and it split up into three roads leading to different houses. Jongdae looked at him, his heart had skipped a beat, an uncomfortable feeling spread in his chest.
“That is true but I did not plan any experiments or wanted them to happen”, Jongdae said. “And I tried my best to not hurt anyone”.
Minseok’s yellow eyes were glowing in the dark night. They resembled the ocean of light dots underneath them. “I’m sorry, Minseok”, Jongdae said quietly and looked away.
“What for?” Minseok asked. Jongdae turned away. “For not doing better”, Jongdae muttered.
“What do you mean?” Minseok asked.
Jongdae turned around again and looked at Minseok with despair. “Sometimes I thought it was us, the ordinary humans that were the real monsters in there. We were way more cruel and brutal than any of you have ever been”, Jongdae said.
There was a gentle breeze and Jongdae sighed at the cool refreshment. He shortly closed his eyes. He was so tired and exhausted. When he opened his eyes again, Minseok had stepped closer. He had a serious expression on his face. “I told you I forgive you… Jongdae, is now a good time to tell me?” Minseok asked then. Jongdae blinked confused.
“Huh? For what?”

Minseok frowned. “I said something that upset you. You did not want to say the reason out loud”, Minseok said. Jongdae opened his mouth. “Oh”.
He breathed out and looked away. Minseok shrugged. “Wasn’t it you who said I should try to understand the whole human relationships and emotions thing by asking questions? How am I supposed to understand if you don’t explain?” Minseok asked. Jongdae looked at him.
“But you already know… you know I would do – anything to… to help you”, Jongdae said ending differently than he had wanted to.
“You know why”, Jongdae added and looked away. Minseok eyed him for a while.
“Actually, I don’t know. I haven’t had the chance to ask you why you helped me escape and why you always tried to take over other guards’ duties to watch me”, Minseok said then.

Jongdae stretched and clenched his hands as he looked over the wide glittering city lights in the night. “Because I love you”, he said then.
It was quiet except for the distant noise of the city. Then Jongdae turned his head to look at Minseok’s reaction. Minseok had said nothing and Jongdae had been scared of his reaction although he halfway had expected none either way. Minseok was looking at him as if he was thinking very hard, then just as Jongdae looked at him he stepped close and kissed him. Jongdae stepped back and stared at Minseok.
“That’s what you did last time when you said that”, Minseok said as if he was trying to explain. Jongdae shortly closed his eyes.
“I – I didn’t think you would remember that”, Jongdae murmured and touched his lips.
“Why should I not?” Minseok asked.
“You were completely drugged and not yourself then”, Jongdae murmured.
“I was completely myself just with a few more hormones and feelings thanks to the drug cocktail they gave me”, Minseok said. “The drugs never did anything to my memories”, he added. “That makes it worse”, Jongdae murmured.
“Why?” Minseok asked. Jongdae took a deep breath and let the air escape his mouth slowly. He covered his eyes.
“I took advantage of the drugs, you were completely high on them and I could not hold myself back. You never gave your consent to what happened”, Jongdae murmured into his hands. “I am ashamed of that”.
Minseok was quiet for a few seconds and then laughed. “No one ever asked us for our opinion ever. But if that’s burdening you so heavily, I did not mind”, Minseok said. Jongdae looked at him. “Why would I? I would have definitely put up a fight had I not wanted it”, Minseok said. “I am always perfectly honest with you”.

Jongdae reached out his hand and then stopped midway but Minseok did not move back. Jongdae touched Minseok’s face, his fingertips trembled against his cheekbone.
“It’s alright, Minseok. You don’t have to pretend any feelings that you do not have. I know that they are not there”, Jongdae whispered.
“You don’t look alright however”, Minseok said plainly.
“I know I could never be with you in the way I wanted to. I accepted that long ago”, Jongdae said and turned away.
“Why would you still then avenge me?” Minseok asked.
“Because you cannot force love where there is none but neither can you make it go away by will alone”, Jongdae said and walked ahead. “So don’t mention it again. I can live with it”.

They were walking in silence to Dr Kim’s house that was now Junmyeon’s. Nothing had changed much, the garden and house looked the same as the night they had sneaked up here to kill Dr Kim. Jongdae rang the doorbell this time however and the front gate was opened by a tall young man dressed in green.
“Oh, good evening. Are you here for your appointment with Dr Kim Junmyeon?” he asked Minseok. Minseok frowned and looked at Jongdae.
“Appointment?” Jongdae asked. The young man looked politely confused.
“Yes, every Aureum Luscus is invited to get an individual examination and review with Dr Kim Junmyeon”, he said.
“An individual examination?” Jongdae asked, feeling his heartrate go up.
“That is correct, Jongdae. Thank you, Eric, they are my guests. Jongdae, Minseok, come in, please”. Junmyeon was sweeping into the entrance hall from down the stairs. He waved them over to the dining room. “Have a seat”, Junmyeon offered.

Jongdae and Minseok sat down. “So what is this all about?” Jongdae asked.
“It has been a secret but I have been researching. I found that every Aureum Luscus was treated the same with the premise of them having no feelings. This was said to be due to the lack of hormones which their body did not produce. I researched and realised every Aureum Luscus has to be examined individually and receive their individual diagnosis”, Junmyeon said. “We got individually examined”, Minseok said.
“Yes, but they looked at you with fixed premises. May I have a word with you, Minseok? Under four eyes”, Junmyeon said. “Yeah”, Minseok said. Jongdae got up.
“Feel free to go upstairs into the library and wait for me”, Junmyeon said. Jongdae frowned but left the room where Eric was waiting for him.
“The library?” Jongdae asked. Eric nodded. “I’ll take you there”.

Minseok crossed his arms. “So?” he asked. Junmyeon leaned forward a little.
“I think I have found the reason for your problem”, Junmyeon said. Minseok raised his eyebrows. “My problem?”
Junmyeon nodded. “Minseok, hardly any of you are mutated monsters that cannot feel like a human being. Most of you are absolutely able to produce those hormones that you were said to be lacking. To be sure of course, I would need to examine you. It isn’t much that I have to do. I will take a bit of blood and do an MRI of your head”, Junmyeon said.
“You want to be able to feel things, don’t you? I know about Jongdae, you want to know what you would feel for him if you were able to feel normally”, Junmyeon said.
Minseok tensed up. “Well, I am not normal”, Minseok said through gritted teeth.
“Well, you might have mutated genes, that is true. But you are not a monster or abnormal. You do not have to do this examination, it is your decision. I won’t force anyone who doesn’t want to”, Junmyeon said. Minseok loosened his arms a bit.
“And what would you do then? If the results show that I am able to produce these hormones and stuff?” Minseok asked.
“Well, here it gets complicated. Obviously, the further treatment would depend on the results. And if you do not want to do my recommended treatment, you don’t have to either”, Junmyeon said. Minseok nodded and put his chin onto his hands.
“Alright, do the tests with me”.

Eric had left Jongdae alone in the library. It was easy to tell that it contained many valuable books. Books in itself were rather valuable these days because it was hard to get paper. It was cheaper to download books to a tablet. Tablets for reading, saving pictures, songs and documents were also way handier than books. Jongdae stepped closer to the shelves and discovered incredible old books with the letters on the back of the books already gone, covers already shedding from the book. He found books in many different languages and to his surprise hardly any book in the library was written in today’s common language; the unified East Asian language. The unified language had been established after the end of the war and it had been necessary as too many different cultures and languages met as the refugees from all East Asian countries came together in the only city in East Asia. Jongdae knew that towns and especially smaller villages had kept their original languages although there had been an official ban to teach the old languages for over 40 years. In towns it was easier to ignore this ruling but growing up in the city, the only language Jongdae had learnt besides the official language of the city was English. He had to learn it at school but as soon as he knew that he wanted to join the police force he forgot about it. Jongdae ran his finger over the backs of the books and for the first time had the urge to learn some of the old languages. Jongdae walked further through the library and came to a wall where the shelves reached from the floor up to the ceiling. The backs of the books were glinting slightly, the letters were printed in gold and beautiful ornaments decorated the entire back of the books. Jongdae could not read the title and he could not identify which language it was. He was completely hypnotised by the beautiful books until a sound behind him made him jump. Jongdae whirled around and out of habit grabbed for his knife. There was no one behind him in the corridor between the bookshelves. Jongdae carefully walked around the bookshelves and two rows back. A young man was standing there, holding a gigantic book in his left arm, flipping through the pages so fast that it did not seem like he was actually reading.
He closed the book and turned around.
“Jongdae, a knife? Really?”
Jongdae put the knife away. “Sean, you scared me. What are you doing here? We’ve been looking for you all over the city!” Jongdae called. Sean nodded.
“I went from hospital to hospital to help treat those who were wounded in camp two. And I came here to look at the books about medicine”, Sean said and lifted the gigantic book in his arms.
“Did you see Jongin?” Jongdae asked. Sean nodded.
“Just earlier today. He is in quite the state, the people at the hospital really have no clue”, Sean mumbled.
“Sean, Shaila is staying at my house, she refused to go to the hospital although she is dying. Can you come over as quick as possible, please?” Jongdae asked. Sean looked at Jongdae and then nodded. “Yeah, then let’s go. Why are you here by the way?” Sean asked.
“I came here with Minseok, we had something to talk about with Junmyeon”, Jongdae explained.

They were just walking down the stairs when the doors to the dining hall opened and Junmyeon and Minseok came out. “Minseok, I found Sean”, Jongdae said. Minseok nodded at Sean. “I already told him about Shaila, he’s coming with us”, he added. Junmyeon shortly frowned.
“I’ll be back tomorrow morning then”, Sean said to Junmyeon and the three turned to leave.
“Jongdae, didn’t you want something from me?” Junmyeon asked.
Jongdae hesitated. “Yes, I was cleared by court. But I still haven’t got back my job”, Jongdae said.
“Your job?” Junmyeon asked, there was a dangerous undertone.
“Before I was a guard at the camp, I was a regular police officer. Not everyone just inherits a fortune. I don’t have parents who can take care of me, I need a job to earn money. I let a few people stay at my house, they need that money, too”, Jongdae said.
“Are you restructuring your home as a new shelter now?” Junmyeon asked.

Jongdae had not been particularly angry at Junmyeon for leaving them behind or anything else, he had barely gotten to know Junmyeon. He had only heard from Minseok and a few others what Junmyeon was like. But right now anger started to boil inside him.
“I guess, Kyungsoo is staying over, too?” Junmyeon asked. Jongdae nodded stiffly.
“Send him over tomorrow, will you?” Junmyeon said.
“Does that mean you know why they still have not reviewed my request at the headquarters?” Jongdae asked sharply. Junmyeon looked at him.
“Yes, no one who was involved in the entire matter is allowed to work straight away. The trials are not yet over and just because you were cleared right away doesn’t mean you are viewed as innocent or trustworthy in the eyes of the city. So why would they entrust you with an important job as the one of a police officer?” Junmyeon asked.
“Right”, Jongdae said coolly. “Everyone involved except you of course. Heard you’re aiming for the governor’s position now. Kyungsoo was right”, Jongdae said and turned around.

He left the house, storming off so that he had already started to climb down the stairs from the hill when Minseok and Sean joined him. They went in silence back to Jongdae’s house where they let in Sean to take care of Shaila. They had just brought Sean into the living room when Minseok tapped Jongdae’s arm.
“Let’s go outside”, he muttered. They left the house and sat down at the railing across the street. They could see the black wide ocean in front of them.
“What is it?” Jongdae asked more aggressive than he had intended to. Minseok eyed him with a frown.
“Everyone is so mad at Junmyeon when all he really did was looking for a proper treatment for us. He has to establish a good position to influence the decision making. We need someone of us joining into that progress and let’s be honest, Junmyeon is the only one who really can do that”, Minseok said.
“I don’t trust him”, Jongdae said. “He is two faced”.
Minseok shrugged. “I’m not saying you should trust him, anyone in power should not be trusted too much”, Minseok said.
“You don’t trust anyone anyways, do you?” Jongdae muttered. Minseok did not answer after a while of listening to the constant waves rushing back and forth and distant laughter and music, Minseok swung his legs over the railing and hopped down.
“Let’s go back. You should sleep”, Minseok said. “I’m fine”, Jongdae murmured but as he tried to jump down from the railing his body betrayed him. He had barely slept since a week and hardly eaten anything, he felt weak. He would have fallen face down onto the pavement had Minseok not caught him.
“Are you okay?” Minseok asked. “I don’t think you’ve ever asked me such a question”, Jongdae murmured.
“No – I, it’s fine”, Jongdae protested weakly when he felt being lifted up.
His head rolled to the side and he leaned against Minseok’s chest, a steady and calm heartbeat was drumming against his ear. Jongdae closed his eyes and let Minseok carry him home.

I was so excited for Jongdae's confession, I really hope you like the xiuchen development!

Please leave a comment and let me know what you think!

Also, with Kyungsoo cleared and Jongin in the city, you can be sure they will meet very very soon *wink*
So stay tuned for next week's update