What's love?

Many definitions can describe what love is. Almost all of the definitions describe how love is a beautiful thing that ever present in a person's life, such as:

Love is an emotion that comes from a strong affection and a sense of interest in someone with a tendency to sacrifice, have a sense of empathy, attention, affection, and willing to follow whatever is desired by the person he love.

Love is a warm feeling that makes us realize how valuable a person is for us to protect.

Love is a state when you give half your soul to someone, and fill that half with his soul.

Love is the firmness tethered to the humanity that connects the past, the present and the future.

Love is a feeling that no one can know when it comes, even the owner of feelings though.

Love is an invisible thing that can not be seen or measured, but powerful enough to change you in an instant.

Love is a feeling that can cultivate hope, cause sacrifice, and penetrate the boundaries of space and time.

For Lee Seungri, his feelings for Kwon Jiyong have reached a level where all the definitions of love can no longer describe how great his love is. The feeling is too big to be defined with just a set of words. There's no longer a word that can describe hows big his love for Jiyong.

Shouting his name in the rain, looking at him from a distance, and praying in the silence of the night. This silent love is what Seungri can keep, at least for the last 10 years. But no. He's no longer able to maintain his silent love.

Lee Seungri no longer wants to shout his name in the rain. He wanted to whisper his name gently in his ear in the warm of the night.

Lee Seungri didn't want to look at him from distance anymore. He wanted his eyes to see his body clearly, and of course, up close.

Lee Seungri no longer wants to pray in the silence of the night, hoping his love is became true. He didn't want to depend on it anymore. He will make his love became true by himself.

Jiyong POV :

1 month has passed since I realized my feelings. My mind was really stormy for a month. I'm even more stressed than when I have to take care of my album alone. How come. For years I believed that I was straight and all those beliefs were destroyed in just a few hours, even worse it's because one chapter of fanfic only. Ridiculous.

It took at least a week for me until I actually accepted my feelings for Seungri. Don't blame me, it's need a great courage to accept the fact that I, a superstar, a fashion icon, and top korean producer now become a gay who fell in love with members of my own group.

Now after all this awareness how can I look at Seungri? I couldn't have looked at him calmly without causing any sign of my feelings any more. As people say, eyes cann't lie. When I haven't realized my feeling peoples say I'm staring at Seungri lovingly, and now that I'm aware of my feelings even the blind  people may be aware of my feelings.

For the past month I have been avoiding for hangout together with members. Now the other members have been annoyed and forced to hangout at Yongbae's house for dinner. Yongbae and Daesung are no problem to me, even if they realize my feelings most they will do is only make fun of me, but there's Seungri too. How can I deal with that?

Oh, God.

The only thing I can hope for now is Seungri cann't come. Either it's because of NHR or Aori Ramen or whatever. I begging you. Make Seungri cann't come. Help me, God. I promise I'll quit smoking if you help me.

19:00 at Yongbae's home

I went into Yongbae's house and found the person who filled my mind for a month sitting casually while playing his phone on the couch of my friend's living room. He's coming. He's here. Good, even God doesn't want to help me. Quit smoking my . I'll make sure I smoke 2 packs after this.

"Welcome Jiyong-hyung" oohhh thank you Dae. Because of your greeting now Seungri look at me.

"Oh, you've come, Ji. Sit next to Seungri, I cook that rice I mentioned before this now, soon ripe" he smirked. He dared to grin at me. you bae.

How's this? Bae even tell me to sit next to Seungri. If I don't sit down, Seungri will be suspicious, but if I sit down I'm sure it'll get even worse. Sit, no, sit, no ah whatever. I'll make sure bae just singing 1 sentence in next big bang's album. My buddy my . He made my condition worse.

I sit next to Seungri. Just sitting. I don't know what to say, so I just kept quiet.

Ping

-Yongbae 'Ji, what are you doing? talk to him' what's this? Bae made a new group that only he, me and dae.

-Daesung 'Yeah hyung. Get him to talk. Make a move '