(a/n: Maknae Seokjin)

“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll make it easier for you. I’ll promise that you won’t feel any pain once this is all over.” A boy, around thirteen years of age is holding a rabbit in his lap with a soft expression on his face. He petted the rabbit. His small hands hovering over the smooth innocent fur of the creature. He hummed a certain tone as his fingertips touched the rabbit.

It’s an innocent picture to see…

So calm…

So peaceful…

The boy stands up, holding in his hands the rabbit trying to wiggle out of his grasp. The peculiar ring attached on his left middle finger shone brightly along with the animal’s fur. Then he bent down to feed the rabbit.

For some, it is an adorable sight to see. It is like watching an ordinary kid feeding his pet. But he knows. Only, he knows what’s hidden on those hooded eyes. The fire that is reflecting on his iris and void that is impossible to be filled is not refracting on his actions.

The boy is drowning, drenched with the sins that he claimed is right.

Innocent stare turned into a mischievous glint as the small boy watched the rabbit devour its food. Then he slowly pulled out his small hands.

The rabbit plopped side wards. Lifeless. Immobile.

An ear piercing laugh echoed and the boy held the rabbit with its two ears. “See? I told you it’s easier this way. It’s a win-win situation. For you and for me.”

Jin’s eyes fluttered open as he could feel his head throbbing painfully. That dream again. He sighed. It’s been a while since he last have that cruel nightmare. Everything from that place is awfully unfamiliar. He felt like he had been stuck in a parallel world. Hearing the clink clonk of waters outside together with the sun hiding beneath the humid weather, it probably rained and there’s nothing best on a day like this but a nice cup of coffee. Erasing the scary dream on his head, he smiled and called Janggu. And when his favorite accompany came rushing with its four feet, he lift him up and connect their nose together in a sweet way.

“Baby! Could you get my clothes at the top of our drawer? I forgot to bring it here.” It’s Jungkook. He thought his husband already left for work but it seems like it’s still too early. He really loved mornings like this. He hoped he could spend more of their shared days being together. But Jungkook being the bread winner, he had to go to work while Seokjin is working home as an artist. It won’t be too long until he open his new gallery.

“Coming!” Seokjin chirped cheerfully and proceeded to the bathroom near the kitchen. Jungkook’s head peeked desperately between the bathroom door and the wall but when he saw his princess carrying his clothes, a wide smile spread across his face.

Seokjin handed out the nice set of clothes to his husband and when Jungkook reached his arms to reach it, he pulled Jin closer that their lips only almost touched. “Want to join me here, baby?” Jungkook put up a flirtatious smile as beads of water dripped down his soaked hair. Jin’s heart almost skipped a bit. But instead of giving in, he shoved Jungkook’s face inside the bathroom and when he locked the door, he could clearly hear the raven-haired groan in disappointment. “Not a chance, you y! We just did it last night, Give mercy to my you know.”

Jin giggled and Jungkook shouted something along the lines of, “Just you wait, I’m going to tie you up in bed.”

When Jungkook went out of the bathroom, he could smell the heavenly smell of Seokjin’s cooking. So he immediately walked towards his baby and hugged his petite waist. He peppered Jin’s neck with kisses which the smaller responded with a soft moan. Seokjin turned around just to properly kiss the older when something caught his eye on the bathroom’s mirror. Seokjin immediately shut his eyes and gripped Jungkook’s sweater tightly.

“Sweetie, what’s wrong?” Jungkook asked worriedly as the younger buried his face on his chest, trembling.

“J-jungkook… In the bathroom.” Seokjin muffled a sob. “There’s a person in a bathroom.”

Seokjin’s heart rammed in his chest. But when Jungkook turned around there’s nothing there. Jungkook tried to comfort Jin and hugged him tightly. “Shhhh… Baby, don’t worry. There’s nothing there. It’ll be fine.” Jungkook sneakily put the stove off.

“N-no! I saw it! It’s writing down your name in blood, it has no face—J-Jungkook, I’m scared. I’m scared. I’m scared. I’m scared. I’m scared.” Seokjin’s cries got louder and louder that he could feel his breath being stuck at his throat. Jin put both his hands in his neck in pain and Jungkook tried to find a plastic bag in which Jin can breathe in to. Having nothing but a paper bag, he let his princess sit helplessly at the counter and he put the paper bag in Seokjin’s nose and mouth.

After like a minute of Seokjin trembling and crying as he breath in and out of the paper bag, he finally calmed down. Jungkook hugged the boy tightly in worry and Seokjin cried again but this time, calmer than earlier.

“Have you been taking your pills?” Jungkook asked in a soothing voice.

Seokjin sniffled as he looked up at him, “I… I ran out of it.” The younger averted his gaze somewhere, somehow knowing where this conversation will lead to.

“What? Didn’t I say to ask me if you ran out of it? Do you know how dangerous it is when you start to hallucinate again?” Jungkook sounds angry but concern is obvious on his voice.

“I’m sorry. I thought I could… I could live without those pills. Just like a normal person. I want to stop this thing on my head, Jungkook. Only if I could go in a counselling…”

Jungkook sighed . “You know we already went there last time and they just prescribed you those pills. You just need to take them regularly and—“

“And what?! We’re going to ran out of it and I’ll start going crazy again?!” In a snap, Seokjin’s behavior turned a complete flip and he pushed Jungkook away from him. He just wanted nothing but to sleep right now but muscular arms made its way in his waist made him stop on his tracks.

After a year of being with Seokjin, Jungkook knows better than anyone what he has to do. Now, his mouth even speaks based on instincts.

“I’m sorry, babe. We’ll go to another counselling if you want. Just… just don’t be mad at me, yeah?” Seokjin’s heart melted at those words. He felt pathetic all of a sudden. He realized he’s actually not in the position to get mad. His husband is nothing but concerned to him but he always have the urge to twist his words and make him the bad guy.

If only he’s mentally stable, they could’ve made everything perfect but he’s always here to ruin it all.

“I’m sorry too, Jungkook-ah.” Seokjin tip-toed to reach Jungkook’s shoulders and he wrapped his arms around his neck. “Please just bear with me. It will be all fine.”

That morning passed by uneventfully with Jungkook not going to work and busy being a complete bum and Seokjin lazily sketching whatever comes into his mind including the old woman earlier. He did not get to say it to Jungkook because he immediately panicked but it really felt so real. Just like he said it had no face but he got the feeling by its clothes that it is indeed an old woman.

The woman was writing Jungkook’s name with his fingers like its fingers are made to produce red ink. It was written there, ‘Jungkook, my baby’

My baby?

Seokjin shook off the thoughts in his head and try not to think about it again. It’s just a pure imagination anyways, right?

The next day Jungkook announced that he got a one week leave from work which Seokjin squealed in delight. It’s just a one-time thing that Jungkook managed to get a free leave from his boss and they’re going to make sure that that one week would be pretty eventful.

“What do you think about going to the orphanage, Kookie?” Seokjin asked as he took a sip from his tea. Jungkook looked to him seemingly shocked but he manipulated his expression when Seokjin looked at him.

“You mean, the orphanage where we grew up?” Jungkook asked and Seokjin just nodded. “Why all of a sudden?

The younger looked at him as if he just murdered a person. “What do you mean by ‘all of a sudden’? That’s the place where we became official, remember? I just want to visit those memories again.”

Seokjin looked at Jungkook dreamily and the raven-haired just let out a nervous chuckle. “Okay, then. It’s not like you’re the only one who wants to cherish those memories anyways.”

Another lie.

Seokjin smiled and shouted ‘yehey!’ before going to pack his clothes.

The child is watching a house burn. Not just any house, but his own house. But he doesn’t feel any emotion. The huge dancing of fire seems to never bother him any way possible. The fire reflects on his eyes like a mirror and the child just laughed in amusement… Just like he did when he killed that animal.

“Mom…”

“Dad…”

“Hyung…”

He smiled.

“Let’s stick together just like we used to.”

Then one by one, blurry images of people stood by the child’s back. It was as if they were edited out. It was as if they weren’t supposed to be there.

But they looked like a family.

“Seokjin, wake up. We’re here.” Jungkook smiled as Seokjin wiped out the sleepiness in his eyes. “How do you manage to sleep the moment we step foot in this train?”

“Jungkook, it’s true that I’ve been on the orphanage just before I turned a year old, right?” Seokjin asked out of the blue and Jungkook looked paralyzed out of a sudden.

“Yeah… I asked father Min before and it’s true.” Seokjin let out a relieved sigh but Jungkook seems to be bothered by it.

“Why? Do you perhaps remember something?”

“No, it’s not that. These days I have these weird dreams about a boy about seven years old. It’s my first time seeing that boy so…”

“…So you thought that boy might be you? Ridiculous.”

“I know, right. There’s no way I’d burn my own house.” Seokjin whispered the last part but the raven haired heard it clearly.

“You’re still taking the pills, right? You should not forget to take it regularly so you won’t dream about such things.”

“Yeah, don’t worry. I’ll make sure to take it so that I’ll heal faster just like what you said.”

Seokjin clung on Jungkook’s arms and the older just patted Seokjin’s brown locks fondly. “Good boy.”

When they arrived at Maeum Orphanage, they expected some changes but in their shock, they couldn’t see even slightest of difference from the moment they leave it. It’s like jumping on an old memory. Only that it’s more realistic.

“Oh, Jeon Jungkook-ssi. Kim Seokjin-ssi, welcome back.” Father Min is spreading his arms wide as if waiting for a hug and getting the signal, Kim Seokjin immediately ran towards the priest and hug him tight causing the old one to laugh.

“We missed you, father. I’m sorry we can’t visit you more often.” Seokjin said pulling out from the hug and signaling Jungkook who held all their luggage to come closer.

“It’s okay. I know how hectic things are in Seoul. I can’t blame you even if I want to.” The priest chuckled in amusement when he saw Seokjin’s face of guilt.

“You and your silliness,” Seokjin glared playfully at Father Min. “But father, it’s Jeon Seokjin now. Not Kim Seokjin.”

The brown haired boy grinned from ear to ear and intertwined his and Jungkook’s hands. The priest can’t help but look shock. No, not him.

“W-what?”

“We got married last year, father. We realized we can’t live with each other that’s why. Don’t be upset that we did not invite you! I just wonder you might be busy with the other kids.”

“No, it’s not that.” The priest pulled Seokjin away from Jungkook. “Let me talk with Seokjin for a while, Kookie.”

Kookie… Absurd. Jungkook remained stoic but even though he knew that old man will say something he let it off the hook. He would never let that old man spew some nonsense on his own wife. He won’t let it. “Okay, then I will put our baggage on the guest room. See you later, Jinnie.” The said boy just grinned happily and waved a goodbye to Jungkook.

“What is it that you want to say, father?” The old man looked anxious. He held Seokjin’s arms as if telling him to listen carefully on what he’s about to say but he’s afraid. Too afraid. He checked once more if the raven haired was gone and when he heard the door got shut, he looked directly in Seokjin’s eyes. His face is awfully serious that it starts to scare Jin.

“Seokjin-ah, you know how much I adore you, right?” Jin nodded. “Then please listen what I’m about to say.”

He let out a deep long sigh.

“Break up with Jungkook. No, don’t even go near him. He’s dangerous, Jin-ah. I don’t want you getting hurt.”

­-To be continued-