“Isn’t it beautiful? I come here every year to watch the sunrise…”

Jaehwan smiled as he recalled her light voice and the conversation they had.

The sky was still dark and it was cold out. Jaehwan gave an involuntary shiver as he rubbed his gloves hands together. In couple of minutes, streaks of light would shine as the sun peeks out of the horizon. Dark will turn to light, cold into warmth.

He is standing at her beach in Busan, at the cusp of sunrise on New Year’s Day; eyes closed as the song that brought them together came from within his heart…

Why are there so many break ups in this world?
Why is love so difficult? I was curious about these things
And now I'm asking again, how am I to cope with this?
Does all this sadness even end?

He recalled a conversation he had with her about break-ups.

They were in his small practice room as usual; her head on his stomach as she scrolled through her SNS, him leaning against the wall reading his latest manga online.

“Oh oppa, look! It is reported that Beakhyun and Taeyeon have officially broken up.”

Jaehwan looked up from his phone as Eunji pushed hers towards him. He caught a glimpse of the headlines and shrugged. “Oh okay,” he said, feigning interest because he knew that it was what she wanted. “What happened?”

“Don’t know,” she shrugged as she lay back down on his stomach. “Supposedly busy schedules. But I think it must be more than that.”

“Well, busy schedules are a valid concern. It can get difficult to meet up if both are busy all the time.”

“True that. But relationships are more than just meeting up all the time right? There are deeper things like trust, communication, similar interests and values…”

Jaehwan smiled as he played with her hair while listening to her list her important values in a relationship. He was so fascinated by the way it fell over her forehead that he nearly missed the question she asked him.

“So what do you think is the most important in a relationship then?”

I love you, I love you

I thought that there'd be more time to tell you those words
Already I'm envious of that person

Who'll come and take you away someday

The word ‘love’ can be pretty annoying.

It could cover a multitude of actions and emotions, and yet be very specific and targeted at the same time. It could mean everything, and it could mean nothing at all.

But to Jaehwan, the biggest component to love is assurance and security. The two values that he had never thought much about and took for granted of, having always been at the receiving end of the love, having always been the one in control of the relationship.

That is, until he fell hopelessly in love with her.

Don't be happy

If you are trying to be happy
Then that means you have to forget me who loves you
As if stabbed with a thorn

Every time I breathe, tears come out
Living, isn't living at all

He recalled the moment when he realized that he could possibly have lost her forever.

He wanted to pretend that he did not know. But that was impossible given the exploding headlines. Then he decided ignore it and to put it out of his mind. He knew that it would only hurt him and make him more depressed knowing what he had let go and lost. But curiosity got the better of him.

Jaehwan watched the snippet of her performance with In Guk at the TVN awards.

Her smile was so powerful. It used to give him life and energy despite tying his tongue and turning his brain to mush. Now, all he experienced was heartbreak so acute and raw.

Because the smile was no longer for him.

Don't love

If it's not me, then you can't be with anyone else forever
That place where I left you

If I just remember that place then I can find you
This is just a love that's put on hold

It's okay, smile
 

He was not fully sure how or why he ended up in the Busan beach. Maybe he had hoped to see her here. Maybe he was reminded of the memories that they had shared together. Or maybe it was just the scenery.

But one thing he knew: this is the place to let her go.

It had been 6 months.

It is time.

These tears and this pain

Is okay

Jaehwan breathed out the last few lyrics of the song, realizing the significance and the visualization of it coming to a complete circle. He opened his eyes and smiled wistfully as he watched the sky turn orange.

I come here every year to watch the sunrise, she had told him. It gives me a sense of hope and endless possibilities.

Yes, I’ll like that, Jaehwan thought, taking in a deep breath. Hope and endless possibilities. Who knows what the New Year will bring?

He heard the faint sound of shoes scrapping against sand behind him, and hoped that it was not someone who had recognized him. The voice that called out to him was one that he would have never expected to hear again…

“Oppa?”

-----

- Don’t Be Happy by Jaehwan/Ken (VIXX) from the King of Masked Singer (MC the Max cover)

AN: And it's finally done! Leaving the ending for your intepretation for now, but I do have some thoughts and ideas of a sequel to end off this 'Perfect' series. Comment and let me know if it is something that you'll be interested in (: Once again, thank you for reading and hope you enjoyed a little piece of my imagination!