heavily inspired by If It Was You by Jung Seung Hwan and also PD101 team that cover this song. I cried. You should check it out, it was the best. I can't more but it makes me ache to write a Chanbaek based on this. enjoy! 

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Pairing: Chanbaek

Genre: Angst, Romance

 

 

Minseok look at his friend sullen state, sighing after the nth times. He didn't know how many times Baekhyun got stood up by his boyfriend every time they went for a date. He didn't know how many times Baekhyun runs to his house, tears streaming on his face, eyes puffy and voice hoarse from crying. But he do know that Baekhyun is dumb and is in love with a certain yoda-eared who claims himself as Park Chanyeol, Baekhyun's righteous boyfriend. Yeah right. 

Baekhyun eyes were blank, vivid from any emotions after hours of crying. Minseok didn't know how to say to his best friend that he is just wasting his time putting up a front to a person who will never cherish him as he is. 

"Baek, you know this will not be the last time he do this right? Until when will you suffer? Until you die?" Minseok asks. He knows he shouldn't be so insensitive but he just couldn't help it. This has got to be the last time Minseok helps him. He is tired seeing his best friend all alone and sad. Baekhyun never shares stories at him between him and Chanyeol and Minseok isn't the one who likes to mind people's business. All he can say that Chanyeol is a ed up who will regret not appreciate Baekhyun while he is still here, loving the out of him. 

Baekhyun sniffs, "I mean, he said sorry. That should count right? At least he didn't forget to tell me that he can't make it today." Minseok rolls his eyes, "And when he ask you for another date, he'll just say sorry again and you have to wait like a waiting for his holy existence and just to get dump again? You can say sorry to a broken glass, Baekhyun but it'll never stay in the same shape again. That goes for you, Baek. I am so worried about you if you didn't warn me I'll ing kill Park Chanyeol with my hands right now." 

Baekhyun chuckles, "He is half of your size, Min. Pick a person your own size to deal with." Minseok scoffs, not saying anything. Atleast Baekhyun is not crying anymore. 

"Yeah, yeah whatever. Now, are you alright to go home? I didn't mean ill but Jongdae is being an today, no wait, he is an but you know what I mean. I am so damn tired to deal with my own emotions and yours, no offense. I'll deal with everyone tomorrow. I just want to sleep today." Baekhyun looks at his friend, "Yeah, sorry for disturbing. Again. I didn't mean to. It's just.. I have no one to talk with. It was lonely at home." 

Minseok hugs him, caressing his shoulders. "I know. I'm sorry for not being a proper friend. I am not good enough to give mature advices. I have my own to deal with. But I am always here, comforting you and listening to your rants despite it being as insane as you. I still love you though." Baekhyun smiles, weak. "Yeah, thanks. I'll go now." Baekhyun grab his things and left Minseok house. He feel bad for not cheering up Baekhyun before he leaves but he is so exhausted to deal with everyone today. Blame a certain dinosaur for that. Minseok cursed and run to his room, fuming. 

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun walks slowly, taking a breather. Today has been hectic. Thank god his house and Minseok is quite close towards each other. He is grateful that he has a friend like Minseok. If he hasn't, he'll probably kill himself down the river right after he realizes he got dump today by Chanyeol for the second time. Yes, you might be saying, "Second? Isn't that like short? Why are you acting all prissy then?" Well, it is a second date but they have been in a relationship for almost a year now and Chanyeol never ask Baekhyun for a date until 8 months later. The first date, Baekhyun was all excited and giddy. He dress up prettily, wearing a nice pink sweater and a white ripped jeans. He knows Chanyeol likes him wearing white. Said it make him looks pure. 

He waited for almost 3 hours before Chanyeol texted him that something got caught up at home and he had to settle things with his parents. Baekhyun cried a lot that day, since it was his first date. Chanyeol never asked about him after he texted and after three days, Chanyeol came to him and acted everything was normal. Baekhyun didn't want his relationship with Chanyeol to get strained so he too acted like nothing has happened like he didn't get dump by his boyfriend on his first date. Minseok scold him for being so soft towards Chanyeol but Baekhyun just couldn't help it. 

Chanyeol is his first love, his first everything. Chanyeol is the one who initiates his moves towards Baekhyun and Chanyeol is the only one who embrace Baekhyun and Baekhyun finally finds himself as worthy. Chanyeol loves him and he loves Chanyeol. Those sweet kisses and warm hugs makes Baekhyun feel alive and nothing can stop him from feeling like that to Chanyeol. But now the question is, does Chanyeol loves him as much as Baekhyun did?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun look at the blue skies, closing his eyes to enjoy the warmth of summer. The weather wasn't too bad, the cool breeze of wind softly going through over his face. It is almost fall and Baekhyun is a bit sad that school holiday is almost over. Although this summer he hadn't done much dates with Chanyeol, atleast he can meet him at school and hold hands during lectures. His heart is all giddy when he thinks of that. 

He loves Chanyeol. So so much. Chanyeol is like his savior, always there when he needs him. Baekhyun is not really a happy child. Both of his parents are too busy to occupy times with him. He asked his mother whether they are going anywhere during holidays but he just got a swat of hands and she walks away to talk to her clients on her phone. He tried to be as enthusiastic towards Chanyeol and Minseok - both of them didn't really know about Baekhyun's family issues but he tried to not dwell too much on it. He didn't want to burden any of them with his problems. 

Baekhyun sighs. Why is he like this? He should be thankful that he can live rather normally without anyone's disturbing him. He has a good friend that cares about him and a sweet boyfriend who doesn't really care about him. Well, the truth hurts and that's that. 

"Hey, beautiful." He peeks an eye just to see the tall young lad with brown hair staring at him with a handsome smile, eyes soft. 

Baekhyun grins, both of his eyes form a crescent. He is happy.

"Hey, handsome. What cha' doin here?" He raised a brow, mimicking a southern accent. Chanyeol flash him a toothy smile, all too cute and adorable for Baekhyun's heart to handle. He gushes quietly. "Nothing, heard a certain beauty always hang out over here alone letting all men drooled over him. What a naughty boy he is." Baekhyun's heart leapt. He wants to kiss Chanyeol all over his face. 

Baekhyun nods, look away. "I see. He isn't here though. You might've missed him just a while ago. Do you want to sit with me to heal your broken heart then? I am good in mending crushed hopes." And it's the truth. Chanyeol laughs with that bass voice of him and tackles Baekhyun. He screams and try to run away from Chanyeol huge arms but Chanyeol cages him in, kissing Baekhyun like he have never done before. 

He loves Chanyeol kisses, it is always deep and his stomach is always fills with wonderful butterflies flying all over. 

He squeals softly, heart is way too weak to live anymore. He wants to live with Chanyeol kisses everyday. He wants to wake up and sleep with Chanyeol kisses. He wants to kiss Chanyeol when both of them made love. He wants to kiss Chanyeol when the tall lad is sad. He wants to kiss Chanyeol when he is sad. He wants to do everything with Chanyeol. 

Chanyeol broke the kiss, smiling softly at Baekhyun. "I missed you," He whispers. Baekhyun closes his eyes, leaning all over Chanyeol to show him his reciprocate feelings for the tall man. Chanyeol understood, slowly caressing Baekhyun hair and sighs, content. 

 

 

Both of them falls quiet, enjoying the warm breeze of summer. Baekhyun listens to his boyfriend heartbeat, strong and is in the same rhythm as him. 

"Baekhyun," Chanyeol calls his name. Baekhyun looks up, hands all over Chanyeol lips, just touching. "Yes?" He replies. Chanyeol grew silent and suddenly the situation feels tense and Baekhyun no longer feel comfortable in Chanyeol's embrace. He sits up and look at Chanyeol, asking him to proceed with whatever he wants to talk. 

"Baekhyun-ah," He says it again, much softer this time. Like he wants to say something big to him. 

Baekhyun chuckles nervously, "What is it Chanyeol? Get it done. You are scaring me." 

.

.

.

.

"Let's break up," 

.

.

.

.

Thus Baekhyun start to wreck himself up, crushing it into little debris and just gone into nothing. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun cried so so much he can't even open his eyes after a few days. Minseok can't do anything to help. He isolated himself in his room, his parents didn't come home after three days, Minseok tries to persuade the little one to go out but he refuse and never accept any of Minseok offers. He didn't eat, he didn't even do anything. Minseok heard him crying over the past few days and it breaks his heart to see the smaller cries with agony. He never leave Baekhyun's house and make sure Baekhyun is okay. He didn't know what makes Baekhyun cry so hard but Minseok has an inkling it is related to the one and only Park Chanyeol.

Baekhyun goes out from his room looking like hell, all disheveled and messy. Eyes red and bloodshot, lips cracked and stained with dried blood. 

"I want water," He asks. Minseok runs to the kitchen, grab a glass and pour water. Baekhyun sits at the couch in his living room, dazed. Minseok sits beside his friend and hands him the water. Baekhyun accepts it with no word. 

After he finishes, Baekhyun put down and cry once again, this time Minseok hugs him tightly, also crying. Seeing him in a wrecked state makes Minseok feels so guilty and disappointed at himself for not being a good friend. Baekhyun cries and cries before he grows quiet, slowly asleep. 

"Baekhyun-ah, be strong. I know you are much stronger that that . You deserves better. You deserves much more." Minseok leans down to give the boy a kiss on his forehead, patting him softly not trying to wake him up. He too need a sleep after days of worrying of his friend. 

Baekhyun snuggle softly under Minseok's, heart lifting up just a tad bit better. If only his bestfriend words can soothe the tightening ache inside him. 

 

 

 

 

 

School starts today. Minseok runs to Baekhyun's house to make sure the smaller one is alright and under sucritinized eyes for him to dress properly for school, Minseok nods in content waiting for his bestfriend to eat his breakfast before both of them go to school with Minseok's car. Baekhyun eyes his oatmeal disinterestedly, feeling ill to have an appetite. Sensing his weaken spirit, Minseok nudge him and hands out a glass of milk for Baekhyun. Baekhyun hums, appreciated. 

"Look, I know you are nervous. Hell, I can practically feels it. But you and I got all of this covered, alright? Don't break down. I'll talk to you the whole time and then Sehun will sweep in and try to join us. Hopefully, we can avoid you from looking at Park." Minseok frowns, trying to make Baekhyun understand with his plans. 

Baekhyun stares at him, blank. "I don't feel like talking though, Min. Can you just blabber while I listen? And he knows if I fake a smile or not. Better be natural. He knows that I am affected with this break up too." Minseok sighs. He never realizes how deep both of his friends relationship go under. Maybe it is Chanyeol faults for not taking care of their relationship better. He aches for both of his friends in silent. 

"Alright then. I'll just talk. Just so you know, I'll talk about Jongdae the whole freaking time. You are the one who assist." Minseok playfully warns. Baekhyun forms a small smile. 

 

 

 

True indeed, Minseok talks the whole time they walk through the hallway, with Baekhyun hugging close his books to his chest, eyes absentmindedly looking at the floor while listening to Minseok's rants, chuckling occasionally. His eyes still looks dim and sad and no one asks him why because truthfully, he has been looking like that for the past few months for everyone to notice that the usual shimmery light comes in the form of Byun Baekhyun is a no more. Sehun shuffles in, knocking both Minseok and Baekhyun from their back, getting a slap on his head as his morning greeting from Minseok. Even by that, Baekhyun didn't let out his cute chuckle, his happy feelings diminishing and withering in seconds. 

He didn't saw Chanyeol but he is sure that Chanyeol sees him, and he hates that he didn't appear as strong as he hope when he encounters the man. He don't want to let Chanyeol think that he is incapable of taking care of himself, asking for the help of his friends to take him under their wings when Chanyeol can survive just fine after their break up. Baekhyun feels mad at himself that he start to speed-walk to his locker, hurry so he can go to his class quickly. He fails to notice that both Minseok and Sehun has stop joking with each other, just looking at their small friend in sadness. 

"I feel like killing Park right now," Sehun mutters under his breath.

"The feeling is mutual," Minseok replies. 

But both of them knows they can't. 

 

 

 

Baekhyun sits at the middle row of the class, that is his usual spot to sit every year. He is in his junior year now and usually, Chanyeol will sits beside him but this time, Jongdae calls dibs and rush towards the seat beside Baekhyun, grinning his cheshire smile at him like every morning. 

"Good day, beautiful." And Baekhyun flinches. It wasn't noticable, but Jongdae smiles faded after he saw that. 

"Park really broken you up, huh." He didn't ask. It was a statement. Baekhyun didn't reply to Jongdae, looking down at his notes eventhough they both know he hates studying. Jongdae sigh softly, "Minseok tolds me. If it wasn't for you Baek, I would've bring my dad's chainsaw to cut his off." Baekhyun look at Jongdae, smiling a bit. "You would do that." He said monotonely. Jongdae nods, firm. "Of course. Anything for my sparkly Byun B." Baekhyun laughs a little, forming sincere eye-smile at him. Jongdae's heart melts a little bit. 

"That is unnessecary. This will pass. I need a few more days to recover." Baekhyun states. 

Jongdae lets out a heady breath, patting his friend on the shoulder like a good mate he is. "I hope so, Byun B. Because he don't deserve any of your tears at all." Baekhyun looks away, thinking about his friend words. 

"Maybe," He murmured softly so Jongdae wouldn't get to listen.

Maybe it is for the best, Baekhyun thinks. 

 

 

Two weeks after their break up, Sehun asked him whether he is going to join their classmates birthday party at some really cool skateboard spots 30 minutes away from their school. Baekhyun once went there with Chanyeol because the taller was curious about the place since kids their place usually hangs out there either to chill or to play skateboards. That place will surely filled with cheap boost and some nasty spiked food his classmate always brings whenever he went there. He ponders eventhough he wasn't feeling like going.

Sehun saw Baekhyun's reaction and pouts, "Come on, hyung. Help me. Luhan will be there and I am not ready to face him alone. You have to be my knight. Jongdae and Minseok will be there too, I promise you wouldn't be bored. Live up a little please." Sehun begs him, shaking his hands with desperation. Baekhyun look at Sehun, already regretting his decision once he opens up his mouth. 

"You better don't leave me alone you little . If I saw either any of you ditch me I'm walking home and you will see me tomorrow dead." Baekhyun deadpans. He wasn't serious but he will walk home if any of them ditches them. 

Sehun flash him his millon-watt smile, "We will not, hyung! Boy scouts promise!" He salutes. 

Baekhyun roll his eyes, chuckling. 

 

Baekhyun should trust his guts once he agrees to Sehun. Minseok and Jongdae has long gone, going to god knows where, Sehun is painfully close with Sehun, an alcoholic drinks on one hand. Baekhyun grunts, hating himself for being so gullible once again. 

"Why am I so stupid, for sake." Baekhyun mutters. 

Emptying his second bottle of soju, he wipes his mouth with the sleeve of his hoodie and throws it away to a nearby trashbin. Everyone is having conversations with one another, trying to enjoy the party. Looking around to make sure no one sees him leave, he hums and walk alone. It's gonna take an hour to walk straight to his house from the skateboard spot but Baekhyun wants to enjoy his walk, trying to clear his mind. He lifts up his hoodie, humming very softly. 

He doesn't want to think about Chanyeol, he really don't but he just can't help it. It's been two weeks and neither of them has spoken to each other. Baekhyun avoids any contact with Chanyeol because he thinks, Baekhyun doesn't deserve to listen whatever explanation Chanyeol wants to tell him. Let bygones be bygones, a saying say. Whatever explanation Chanyeol wants to tell him one day, he'll try to be understanding. But right now, it is just very impossible when he is still hungs up on the taller. God knows how one can move on from Park Chanyeol. He prays to whoever ends up being with Chanyeol, she/he doesn't have to experience the same heartbreak like him because man, it surely hurts. 

He walks alone in the cold weather, hands slipping inside the very bottom of his jeans pocket, shivering a little. He always hates the cold and Chanyeol is always there to warm him up with his body heat, cuddling with each other. Whispering sweet nothings to each other's ear, gosh, Baekhyun loves that. He savors in the moment he become one with Chanyeol, he replenish those moments with his smiles because Chanyeol says he adores it, adores it so much that every time he smiles Chanyeol kisses him so softly Baekhyun heart cracks when he remembered it. 

How can they ended up like this is something Baekhyun will always expect their break up will be a little painful because he will never gives up Chanyeol for a million years but how can he forget all the memories of Chanyeol who changes Baekhyun to be better, stronger when he is there with him, holding him and say to trust him he will never let him go?

He should know to never trust anyone, Baekhyun thinks eyes already wet thinking about all of those stupid moments where he is too dumb to realize that it is just an act, a jaded truth from a cold reality that Chanyeol is a coward and will never fight for their love. 

Baekhyun should let him go. 

Because if it was him, he will just love himself.

 

 

---

 

 

and a wrap up! man, this one takes ages to finish because I have so many things to do, so busy to feel sad. Hahaha, anyways again, this one, I didn't really think of any possible ending, I am just like, it, baekhyun shouls suffer until the end. HAHAHAHAHAHA i'm kidding. i love him. 

anyways, I'm on my way to write another drabble and idk when it will finish but I hope you can wait for a while. 

and WHOS HYPE FOR KOKOBOP? IVE ALREADY PRE-ORDERED THEM AND WAITING FOR THEIR COMEBACK! KYAAAAH, EXCITED. 

okay, that's all folks I'm off the internet. Peace out! 

-- sera