"You weren't ready to stay. It's okay." 

FIVE

The Silent Flute was not usually crowded but for some reason tonight the bar that smelled of stale fries and cheap beer was packed with every university student who wanted to drown their sorrows in alcohol. I wasn't planning on even showing up, having no interest in being surrounded by germ-infested students after I had just conquered the plague. However, the text from Sooyoung in all capital letters and misspelt words, meaning she was definitely tipsy, claiming that she needed me there because the cute guy from one of her lectures was there, and she wanted the moral support alongside the kick in the to go and talk to him. Being the considerate friend that I was, I applied some lipstick and put on a pair of heeled boots and made the harsh journey to the bar that brought back memories that put a smile on my face.

Shoving my way through some sweaty boys, I managed to spot Sooyoung sipping on her vodka and coke in the back of the bar at the table with sentences written in permanent marker etched into the wood. Her eyes weren't focused on me, they were zeroed in on a boy with bright red hair and huge ears. Cute. The thought alone made me want to pinch her cheeks because it was adorable and laugh at the same time because it was not at all who I imagined her being with. Nonetheless, my life was already filled with things that didn't make sense, so in reality, I'm not that surprised.

Sooyoung was so enamoured with the boy that she didn't flinch when I sat down across from her, shrugging off my coat and setting it on the chair next to me. She didn't even jump when I waved my fingers in front of her glossy eyes to try and get her attention, she was infatuated.

"Okay," I finally said when I had waited long enough in trying to get her to acknowledge my existence. "I'm going to go get a drink and maybe when I get back you'll put away the heart eyes and actually have a conversation with me." I slid back the chair and stood up, waiting for some kind of hand gesture even a flutter of a finger to let me know that she was alive ... I got a blink. "It's like talking to a brick wall," I muttered before pivoting on my heel and walking through the throng of people to get to the bar.

The entire situation was hitting me with waves of déjà vu, my lacking ability to gather the attention of the bartender was amplified by the influx of girls in short dresses and boys who took part in shouting matches with one another. I sighed out in defeat after waving my hand for the fifth time at the bartender when he came over to my side of the bar. I could take my top off, get on the bar and dance around and it still wouldn't get me a raspberry cider. 

I must have been invisible, because why else would someone shove themselves into the small amount of space between the seat next to me? Ready to start a fight, I turned my head and instantly every ounce of anger fizzled and turned into disbelief. He was smirking at me, hair fluffy and a white t-shirt and leather jacket combo that should not be allowed. 

"What do you want to drink Sora?" He leant forward to ask, his lips ghosting against my ear so that he wouldn't have to yell over the noise. 

I shot a look at the bartender, a pout etched on my face. "Well, if the bartender ever decides to notice me, a raspberry cider." 

Sehun grinned while gesturing to the bartender, who just like the first time noticed him after a second. "I thought you were a whiskey sour girl," he teased as the bartender slid my drink towards me. I nodded in thanks. 

"Whiskey sours got me into trouble last time, I don't know if I want to take that chance again," I said simply, shrugging while turning my head away from Sehun. 

His quiet chuckle did something to me. "Did they? What did you do? Dance on the tables? Get into a fight?" Sehun made it so his body was turned in my direction, one of his legs moving to rest against mine so that our shoes were touching. 

I smile, not giving him the satisfaction of my eye contact, letting my eyes remain on the pink liquid in front of me. "I went home with a boy who wore a shirt that could stop traffic." This time I did look at him, the smile faltering slightly, "but I think my biggest mistake that night was not staying with him." I knew we had established that I was sorry for not staying, but it still sat in my chest like an unmistakable ache from where I had hurt him most. 

Sehun stayed quiet but moved closer to me, my side against his front as his free arm wrapped around my back, hooking loosely around my neck to pull me into him. I let out a sigh when I felt the pressure of his lips against my forehead, lingering there for a few more heartbeats before pulling back and smiling at me. "You weren't ready to stay. It's okay." His hand was still wrapped loosely around my shoulder as I nuzzled my nose against his wrist before placing a soft kiss against the skin. When I returned my attention to his face, his eyes were staring at the place where I had kissed, the softest of smiles gracing his face. "What are you doing her anyways? I thought we still weren't feeling 100%?" 

I pursed my lips. "I'm at like a solid 85% but Sooyoung needed my help." My eyes drifted past Sehun to an entranced Sooyoung who was staring nervously at the redhead. Sehun was still staring when I returned my gaze to him. "She is head over heels for the guy from one of her lectures and he just happens to be here and now she won't stop staring very obviously at him." 

Sehun turned around this time, his eyes finding Sooyoung. "Oh wow, you weren't kidding." 

"Of course I wasn't," I said as if it weren't the most obvious thing in the world. "Let's go help her out," I suggested grabbing my drink and Sehun's hand in the other, dragging him with me to the isolated table. 

"Sooyoung!" I screamed which finally caused her to snap out of her trance and sent us a terrified smile. "Oh good, here I was thinking you had turned to stone." 

Her smile dropped and it turned into a glare instead. Her eyes then moved to Sehun and the anger quickly dissolved into joy. "Sehun! Fancy seeing you here. With Sora. My awful friend. Who snores by the way." 

My body stiffened, and this time it was my turn to glare at her. "That was uncalled for," I muttered. "Just nice to see you not frozen in your ogling position. I was starting to get a little concerned." 

Sehun must have thought we were hilarious because he was laughing next to me, his shoulder vibrating against mine as he shook with laughter. I rolled my eyes and took a sip of my drink before speaking again. "Why don't you just go and talk to him?" 

Sooyoung let out an exasperated sigh. "Oh yeah, let me just go do that now." She moved to stand and then stopped moving. "Oh wait, I've been trying to do that for the past half an hour. Why do you think I texted you?" Oh look, sarcastic Sooyoung has made an appearance. "I need you to be my wing-woman," she whispered as she fiddled with her fingers. She then looked up with her best doe-eyed expression that she knew I would give into. Today, however, I was not having it. I gave a sideways glance towards Sehun and once Sooyoung's head tilted in his direction and the plotting grin grew on her face at which Sehun promptly shut up. 

"What? No, no, I'm not being your wingman," Sehun exclaimed leaning back and slinging an arm around the back of my chair. Hopefully, without his knowledge, I took a quick glance at his hand, smiling at the way his fingers messed with the fabric of my blouse. 

After all that we had established on Friday, and after finally finishing Healer, we found ourselves playing Jenga whilst I was cocooned in blankets and struggled to keep my eyes open. It felt like we talked about everything. We went into more depth on my trip abroad and how I struggled with English to begin with, we talked more about his family and how he doesn't think he'll stay in Seoul after he graduates. Our conversation flowed straight into the wintery night, and it wasn't until I had another bowl of samyetang in my stomach that he felt comfortable leaving. He promised he would be back in the morning and then left with a kiss on the forehead. 

Saturday was spent doing work when Sehun showed up at my apartment with his bag, glasses perched cutely on his nose. He brought bagels and wanted to try 'proper tea' that I had brought back with me via the truckload from England. Sehun set himself up on the love seat, typing away on his laptop while I read my textbook and tried to keep my eyes off of him.

"Sehun," I had said after my brain was filled with theories. I didn't say anything until he looked up from his laptop, "thank you."

Sehun smiled, "For what?" He probably assumed I was talking about him taking care of me, but I wasn't.

"For listening to me the other day at your place. I know I unleashed a lot of baggage onto you, but it means a lot to me that you listened." What he had done next surprised me, placing his laptop on the coffee table and standing up only to sit down next to me. Hesitantly he wrapped an arm around me, hugging me close to him. "What's this for?" I had asked him, carefully wrapping one of my arms around his torso.

"Because you won't let me kiss you while you're sick," Sehun whispered and I felt myself flush even more than I already was. "Sora, what you told me, that wasn't baggage. Right now, it's who you are and that's okay. It's your history and they're your feelings. You won't be this Sora for th