You don’t have to be a bad or toxic person to end up in a toxic relationship. In fact, neither of the parties involved has to be toxic but sometimes relationships can turn out that way.

Kyung reads the internet advice article twice, wondering if it’s true when applied or the relationship he had with Jiho. He’s in a lecture, but most people are distracted by their phones or doodling on their notes, so he doesn’t feel too guilty about reading relationship advice on his phone. It’s not like he didn’t already learn the current lecture topic during his advanced math classes in high school anyway. He wonders whether he wants the advice column to be true, because he doesn’t want Jiho to be a toxic person, or if it’s because he doesn’t want himself to be one.

It’s easy to point fingers at the other person and find fault, but part of working out a relationship is to evaluate your own behavior objectively, and determine whether your actions are the ones causing the trouble in your relationship.

He’s on a different article now, and the lecturer is starting to speak louder after he had noticed that the students aren’t listening. It’s giving Kyung a headache. In the back of his mind, Kyung wonders if he should be the bigger person and evaluate his own role in their unhealthy relationship, because maybe…

(Maybe, he has just as much fault in it as Jiho.)

Kyung takes out a pen and doodles on his notebook, idly copying some formulas and proofs on the lecture presentation even though he knows how to do them already. Without looking at the screen, he starts solving the proof, only looking up to check when he’s done. Kyung expects to find the same set of workings on the Powerpoint slides, but he’s wrong, and his brain scrambles to pick out where the mistake lies.

(It’s in his third line of working.)

As he quickly jots down the lecturer’s answer for reference, Kyung considers that maybe this is his problem – that he thinks he knows everything, when he’s really just as clueless as everyone else. Arrogance, Jiho had called it. Confidence, Kyung had rebutted.

(It’s not like Jiho isn’t also full of it anyway.)

As he hears his thoughts in his own brain, Kyung thinks maybe the biggest problem all along is inside his own head.

(He’s too proud to admit when he’s wrong, even to himself.)

Kyung has been staying at Jaehyo’s apartment for the last three nights, and he’s run out of clothes. He’s currently wearing his last clean t-shirt, and he’s already worn the jeans twice (although it was already worn a few times before he packed it), so he’s considering if he can risk going back to his old place to grab some more clothes before Jiho gets home. He can technically just use Jaehyo’s washing machine, but Kyung also kind of needs other things that he didn’t think he would need when he had left, like his books and laptop, so with a glance at the clock in the cafeteria, Kyung calculates that he has maybe an hour to pack everything he needs before Jiho’s due home, and he dashes off to the bus stop.

In their apartment (Jiho’s now, Kyung corrects), Kyung’s glad to find that Jiho really isn’t home. The whole bus ride there, he had been wondering what would happen if he had remembered Jiho’s timetable wrongly (not likely. He had memorized it so he knows when Jiho’s hanging out late after lessons and abandoning him at home), or if Jiho had called in sick, or is just staying home for some reason. He’s relieved he doesn’t need to confront Jiho so soon, although he knows he’ll eventually have to talk to him to sort out their shared apartment.

(Who’s going to keep it? Will anyone continue renting it? Will Kyung have to find a new place? He can’t keep staying at Jaehyo’s.)

Quickly grabbing his clothes and laptop, Kyung stuffs everything he can fit into his backpack, remembering his toothbrush this time.

(Will Jiho notice its absence when he uses the toilet later today?)

Maybe he had miscalculated the timing, or spent too long in a daze while retrieving his toothbrush in the bathroom, because when Kyung emerges from the toilet, he hears a click, and the front door opens, revealing the familiar mess of dark brown hair hanging over slanted eyes.

Jiho’s back.

“You’re home,” Jiho says, like he’s returning to their apartment on a normal day, and that they hadn’t broken up three days prior. It isn’t even really a question, although it doesn’t seem like a statement with how it sounds unfinished.

“I just came back to take some stuff,” Kyung mumbles, trying to zip up his bag.

“Are you going back to Jaehyo’s?”

Kyung keeps silent. He doesn’t really think Jiho’s looking for an answer, not when Minhyuk had told him about how Jiho had found him at Jaehyo the day after he left, and had to be chased off.

Jiho’s scratching his neck, looking slightly exasperated when he asks again, “Are you going back to Jaehyo’s?”

“You know the answer to that, why do you need to ask?”

“I’m asking ‘cause I don’t know. Why else would I ask?” Jiho looks kind of tired, and Kyung wonders if he’s sleeping late writing music like he al