63 texts and 14 missed calls.  Maybe I should just get a new number.  Jinhwan thought as he turned his phone back on.  Taehyun had left for a photo shoot and Mino was working at the car garage, leaving Jinhwan alone with his feelings.

It was a slow afternoon for Jinhwan.  He had some homework assignments he had to grade, but he couldn’t get his brain to focus on anything other than the absence in his heart.  Instead, he sipped a cup of tea while resisting the urge to text Bobby back.  The buzzer pulled him out of his thoughts and into reality.  Jinhwan shuffled over to the panel by the door to check who was at the door.  It wasn’t all that surprised to see Bobby staring back through the security camera.

“Jinhwan I know you’re there.  Please, please, just come down so we can talk.”  There was a desperation in Bobby’s voice that had never been there before and Jinhwan’s voice wavered as he tried to speak.

“I- I can’t.  Just leave, Jiwon.”  

“Please, Jinhwan.  I’m sorry I stayed out last night and I’m so-”

“No, don’t apologize when I know you don’t mean it.  How many times have you said those words?”  Jinhwan cut Bobby off, his voice still shaking but his tone firm.  “You do whatever you want but then feel guilty after and come running to apologize.  And I always forgave you.”  Apparently Jinhwan hadn’t cried out all the liquids in his body last night because as he spoke, tears brimmed his eyes and spilled down his cheeks.  “But it’s not fair.  It’s not fair to me or to you to keep doing this.  If you want to party your life away be my guest, it’s not my problem anymore.”

“So what, you’re just ending us like that?  After four years you just run away and cut me out of your life?”

“Don’t you dare put this on me.  I told you over and over again that all the drinking and smoking had to stop.  In college I was willing to accept it more, but now, he’s just a sinking ship dragging you down with him.”  Bobby looked utterly defeated.  But it’s not like Jinhwan felt like he won anything, he was equally as broken.  “I can’t handle the pain any more, Jiwon.”  Jinhwan backed away from the panel until he hit a wall and sank down onto the floor, curling up into himself.

Eventually Bobby walked away from the apartment building.  Jinhwan watched him leave from the window in the living room and saw Bobby look up from the street to where he knew Taehyun and Mino’s window was.  From where he was, Bobby could see the top of Jinhwan’s head poke out.

Taehyun got back from his shoot to find that Jinhwan was curled up on the couch, his eyes rimmed red.  He set his bag down and went over to his friend, wrapping an arm around Jinhwan’s shoulders.  Jinhwan leaned into Taehyun’s side, crying on his shoulder.

“I guess he came to visit then.”  Taehyun whispered.  Jinhwan sniffled and nodded in response.  “You okay?”  Clearly Jinhwan was not okay, but Taehyun felt inclined to ask.  

“This is going to be a lot harder than I thought.”  Jinhwan mumbled.  “Why couldn’t he be more like Mino?”  He thought out loud.

“If he was more like Mino you wouldn’t have even said yes when he asked you out.”  Taehyun countered.  

“You know what I mean.”  Jinhwan sighed covering his face with his hands.  “When you guys graduated he stopped acting like a frat boy.”  

“Bobby will come around.”  Taehyun assured Jinhwan.  “It’s you I’m worried about.  Are you going to be able to do this?”  Jinhwan exhaled a sigh of defeat and shrugged.

~~~~~~~

The rest of the week wasn’t any easier.  Jinhwan would leave the school to find Bobby waiting for him by his car or by the bus stop.  Walking past him without even a glance was maybe the hardest part.  Jinhwan found himself avoiding certain streets, certain parts of the park, favorite cafes and restaurants.  He steered clear of anything that would remind him of Bobby.

The next week it was like Bobby didn’t even care to try to talk to Jinhwan.  He still waited outside the school for Jinhwan to get off work, but no longer did he beg Jinhwan to look at him, to yell at him, hit him, anything that would tell him that Jinhwan still thought about him.  Instead Bobby just watched as Jinhwan brushed past him to get back to Taehyun and Mino’s place.  

And that’s how it went for a while.  

~~~~~~~

“Dude, why aren’t you answering my calls?”  Hanbin asked.  He was standing in the doorway of Bobby’s room, arms crossed, and pissed.  

“I didn’t feel like it.”  Bobby answered, his voice muffled by the blankets he had pulled over his head.  Hanbin crossed the room in two steps and yanked the blankets off the bed.

“Get your up, we’re going out.”  

“I don’t want to.  Go without me.”  Bobby put a pillow over his head so he wouldn’t have to listen to Hanbin whine.

“It’s been almost a month since he left you, it’s time to move on.  You’re no fun anymore, all you do is hide in your apartment and stalk Jinhwan.  Seriously dude, I think you need to get laid.  Like ASAP.”  When Bobby didn’t offer a snappy comeback, Hanbin pulled Bobby by his ankles in an attempt to get him out of bed.

“Dude, what the ?  Let go!”  Bobby shouted.  Needless to say he was caught off guard by the sudden movement.  He kicked a leg out, narrowly missing Hanbin’s crotch.

“Man, you never want to go out, you never answer my texts, it’s like you don’t exist.  I just want my bestfriend back.  I want the Bobby that knew how to party back.”  Hanbin let out an exasperated sigh, raking a hand through his hair.

“Can’t you see I don’t want to hangout?  Your idea of a party is getting ed up on drugs or getting drunk and taking a stranger home.  That’s not me.”  Bobby got up to face his best friend, meeting his glare with his own.

“No that’s not what Jinhwan wants you to be!”  Hanbin’s voice was getting incrementally louder as he spoke.  “Jinhwan is nothing like you!  He doesn’t like big crowds, he doesn’t like partying, hell, I don’t even know why you asked him out in the first place!”  

“Because he’s smart, and caring, and the way he smiled was ing angelic, and God what I would do to get him back.”  Bobby’s voice met Hanbin’s, raising in volume but not in anger.  “But now it’s too late.  I didn’t listen to him when he practically begged me to stop partying with you and look where it got me.”

“So what?  You’re picking him over me?”  Hanbin shouted.

“I’m not saying that, but if I could go back and redo it all I wouldn’t have stayed out so late, I would have said “No” a few more times.  You’re my best friend, why are you making me pick?”  

“Because he would rather keep you locked up, having dinner dates at home than let you do what you ing wanted to do!”

“Jesus Hanbin, that’s not true!  You don’t know a single thing about us if you think Jinhwan would do something like that!”

“Or maybe you’re just too blind to see how he’s changed you.”  Hanbin countered.

“God, you don’t get it, do you?  He hasn’t changed me, and even if he has I don’t give a because I know it’s for the better.  That’s what loving someone else is about, Hanbin.  But you wouldn’t know because you just stick your in whatever looks your way.  You have zero right to question me because you don’t know what it feels like to love someone so hard you can’t breathe.”

“Wow, tell me how you really feel .”  Hanbin stood in shock after hearing Bobby’s words.  “Good to know you’d rather be with that ex than hangout with me.”  Hanbin spoke quieter now as he backed out of the room.  He left Bobby alone in his room and slammed the front door on his way out.

~~~~~~~~

AN: comment what you think so far  thanks for reading   :D