>____________< ~~ Yulsic !!!!!!!!~~ anything yulsic related is great, great I tell you!!

/low key spazz/

-----

Soft. Yuri was hugging something really soft and warm. She liked it, she missed it a lot. It felt comforting and nostalgic.

Opening her eyes, a floral smell greeted her. Yuri was in a daze as she tried to remember what the hell happened.

Jessica. Pain.

Taeyeon. Tired.

Tiffany. Running.

The medications must have worn out.

Yuri felt her arm tingling from numbness. Why was it so heavy? She wondered. Yuri gazed down and a certain brunette appeared in her view.

Yuri freaked out internally. Jessica was hugging her. Jessica had her head resting on Yuri's chest and her arms wrapped around her waist. Her arm was wrapped securely around Jessica’s petite body.

How did this happen? Yuri wondered, but that was a bad choice, as a headache formed as she tried to remember.

Yuri watched Jessica’s beautiful face as she was in complete peace in her sleep. Yuri tried to get up, and when she did, she realize it was the worst decision.

She had woken Jessica.

“Hmm?” Jessica let out a slight moan as she stirred.

Maybe it wasn’t a bad decision after all.

“Si-Sica...?” Yuri uttered in a frail voice.

Jessica rubbed her eyes, “Yuri…”

As if she hadn’t realize any sooner, Jessica blinked, “Yuri! You’re awake!”

Jessica noticed Yuri not say anything and wondered why.

Their current positions.

“O-Oh my! I’m s-sorry! I-I just got t-tired!” Jessica sat up and waved her hands embarrassingly.

It had been awhile since Jessica had such a nice, warm sleep.

Jessica poked her two index fingers together shyly. “I-I…I didn’t think I’d fall asleep… I only laid down for a couple of minutes.”

Yuri chuckled at Jessica, it had been so rare to see her like this. “Silly… You act like this was your first time sneaking into my bed.”

When they were younger, Jessica would always sneak into Yuri’s room and take over her bed. Leaving no choice for Yuri but to accept it. Yuri never asked why, perhaps, Jessica had her own reasons.

Yuri ruffled Jessica hair as she was blushing mad, “Are you… Are you feeling better?”

Yuri blinked. “What happened?”

Pausing, Jessica stared at her, “You mean you don’t remember?”

“I… I only remember getting out of Taeyeon’s car.” Yuri sighed, such a pain, such an embarrassing pain to that.

 Jessica explained what happened based on what Taeyeon and Tiffany told her.

“Ah…. I see… How pathetic of me.” Yuri tried to sit up. Jessica seemed to notice and stopped her.

Yuri stared at Jessica tending to her again. This wasn’t helpful on detaching her feelings from her.

“Stay still.” Jessica reached over and grabbed a thermometer and measured her temperature.

Yuri had totally noticed Jessica’s s brushing her face when Jessica leaned over her to get the thermometer off the table.

After the beep, Jessica looked at it and sighed, “Your fever is still high. Don’t move too much, Yuri.”

Jessica touched Yuri’s cheek and rested it there for a moment with her expression covered with worry. “I’ll be back.”

Yuri stared at the ceiling above her. Was this really happening?

Jessica was here. Jessica slept with her. Jessica was taking care of her. This would be complete heaven if she could court her, but, what Jessica was really doing was being a good friend.

Friend.

Deep thinking gave her another headache.

Yuri let out a heavy sigh. Just in time for Jessica to waltz in with some towels.

As Jessica was folding the towel, she asked, “How did you get yourself so sick? You really had me worried!”

Yuri stared at her blanket and was silent for a second. Then, she looked up at Jessica. “I have no idea.”

Silence. It really felt awkward this time.

“You’re not lying to me, are you?” Jessica’s eyes filled with doubt as she placed the towel on Yuri’s head.

Yuri said nothing.  She didn’t need to as she probably thought Jessica knew the answer already.

However, Jessica saw through her fake smile and felt terrible. “Yuri…”

Yuri felt guilt inside her. It felt like she had done something wrong. But, in theory, she didn’t do anything wrong.

Jessica whispered, her hand grazing Yuri’s patch. “I’m sorry for not noticing earlier.”

Damn. She saw it. But, why would Jessica be sorry for that?

“Does it still hurt?” Jessica asked, with those genuine, loving eyes.

Yuri was lost in them and she soon turned away, “Not anymore…”

“I saw your poorly done band aid. Seriously, Yul, if I hadn’t caught it… I wouldn’t have known you had another injury.”

For a while, Yuri said nothing. She let her eyes shut as if it made the guilt fade away.

Seconds later, she suddenly felt cold. Jessica had pulled the blankets down, only revealing Yuri’s upper half body.

“Huh?” Yuri stared at Jessica questioningly.

“I’m putting on medication on your bruise. You can hate me all you want, but you can’t stop me for caring.”

Jessica lifted Yuri’s shirt, revealing the abs Jessica saw for the second time. She was beginning to blush again.

“S-Sica.” Yuri was also getting reddened, but it was covered up by the fever.

“D-Don’t do a-anything f-funny, you d-dummy.” Jessica nervously poured the medication on her shaking hand.

“I-I can do it m-myself, Sica.” Yuri held Jessica’s hand and stopped her.

“Be quiet and rest.” Jessica scolded her. It had also been a long time since she felt the warmth of Yuri’s hand on hers.

Yuri obeyed and let Jessica tend to her. Jessica was rubbing the liquid medication onto her abs.  Jessica looked away shyly, she was getting slightly aroused.

Yuri matched the same look as she looked to the side, she also, getting aroused.

Yuri thought that it was enough, and that any longer she might do something she’d regret; so she grabbed Jessica’s hand and stopped her, “Here, I’ll do it.”

Yuri grabbed the bottle a bit too aggressively, and accidentally pulled Jessica towards her as well.

Jessica’s face was inches from Yuri’s as the two stare intently at each other. Seconds became minutes, minutes felt like hours when the two felt like they were in their own world, gazing into each other’s eyes.

At the very moment, Yuri really wanted to kiss her. She desired to feel how her lips tasted.

Jessica rested on top of Yuri, panting. Her face was hot from blushing. Jessica listened to her heartbeat thrashing wildly, while Yuri’s sent vibrations to Jessica’s body. Slowly, both heartbeats calmed down and synchronized with each other. It was a beautiful resonance.

Jessica hadn’t move from her spot, but she gazed away. Her face turning redder by the minute.

Jessica clenched her fists near Yuri’s chest as her head rested in the crook of Yuri’s neck.

“N-No… I’ve been a bad friend for not being able to see what you’ve been going through.”

Tears began to well up on the lining of her eyes, “I don’t know what’s going on with you anymore, Yuri! Please tell me what’s wrong so that I can help you.”

"You keep asking me that, asking me what's wrong."

"It's because you keep making me wonder!" Jessica's eyes were on Yuri's. This was Yuri's chance to resassure her, to say anything to make her feel content.

Jessica waited, waited for a hopeful  answer, but her hopes were crushed when she saw a flicker of defensiveness in Yuri's eyes.

"That's..." Yuri bit her lip. "That's my own personal business."

Jessica clenched her fists harder.  "But... I'm your best friend."

Yuri knew she had hurt Jessica. But, what was she supposed to say? That she was hurt because she was in a happy relationship?

How could she say that? How could she suddenly spill out all of her feelings when what she had been doing was trying her best to suppress and make it disappear?

“I’m sorry.”

Was what Yuri could only muster up to say. “I’m sorry, Sica.”

Yuri wrapped her arms around Jessica and hugged her. A hug that Jessica deeply missed. Jessica closed her eyes and sunk into Yuri’s warm embrace.

----

Jessica had been staying over at Yuri’s place for the past week now and Yuri had no objections to that at all. Yuri was feeling a lot better, her fever had gone down and her bruises had swelled down.

“Thanks, Sica.” Yuri said genuinely while the two were sitting on the couch.

“I told you, without me, you are a good for nothing Seobang who can’t take care of herself.” Jessica wiggled her index finger.

Jessica thought Yuri was strange. The girl was strong and yet, way too vulnerable.

Yuri rolled her eyes, “Yeah, sure mom.”

“It’s wife!” Jessica corrected cutely. 

Yuri grinned at Jessica’s cute retort, but it soon dropped when the two stared at each other long. It wasn’t the actual stare, but the feeling that was forming.

Yuri looked away and a silence that took over.

“Yul.”

Yuri lifted her head up a little. The way Jessica said her name was coated in sultry. Her heart started beating rapidly. “Ye-Yeah?”

”Are you sure you’re well enough to take be on your own?” Jessica asked, still feeling a bit shy from their earlier incident.

“Yeah, I’m still in one piece.” Yuri smiled reassuringly to her.

“You know….” Jessica said softly. “You mean a lot to me... I just wanted you to know that…”

And you mean the world to me. Yuri’s feelings were being magnified, and she really needed to control them.

“Sica.” Yuri smiled, with a weak attempt at her best friend smile. “Your happiness means a lot to me.”

Jessica felt relieved, and crawled up to Yuri, clinging onto her arm as the two relaxed on the couch. 

Yuri’s heartstrings felt like it was tugged by some invisible force that followed with uneasiness.

Once again, there was another silence.

“Yul?” Jessica called shyly.

“Hm?”

“You love me, right?” Jessica mumbled, her lips pressed into Yuri’s shoulder.

Yuri was caught off guard with the question. The two haven’t spoken much to each other like this ever since Jessica’s relationship with Taecyeon.

To summarize, Yuri acted like a stranger. Did it hurt? Of course it hurt. It was like losing someone she loved who would always come dashing towards her when something happened, lecturing and nagging her because of how annoying she was.

Yuri’s throat felt tight. She loves Jessica. But, not the way Jessica thinks.

Jessica half expected a teasing response, but instead, Yuri’s arm crept up and pulled her closer, and she felt a soft kiss being pressed on her forehead. Jessica nearly melted at the gentle gesture.

Jessica’s face was heating up her cheeks.  Her heartbeat was racing, thumping loudly in her ears.

What’s wrong with me? Jessica thought. And her train of thoughts soon ended when she heard Yuri speak.

Yuri mustered up a genuine smile, “I do.”

As a friend. That’s all she was to her.

A friend.

----

Jessica ended up falling asleep on Yuri’s arm. Yuri really missed Jessica.

And annoying her.

“Sica~” Yuri said in a chirpy voice.

Jessica heard something annoying ringing in her ear.

“Sica wake up~”

Jessica groaned and lazily palmed Yuri’s face. “Be quiet, Yuri.”

“Sica~ wakey wakey~” Yuri continued in a voice like she was excited.

Jessica was not.

Yuri’s annoying voice penetrated in Jessica’s skull. Jessica’s rationality gave in to her heart’s unearthly desires.

“What?” Jessica gave Yuri a detesting glare.

Yuri whispered smugly. “Have a good sleep.”

Jessica groaned and kicked Yuri off the couch, which made Yuri laugh. Jessica rolled so her back was facing Yuri. Her face was blushing. Her heart was racing. The sight of Yuri’s face gave her an indescribable joy.

The sound of Yuri’s door began to make noise, and soon, it opened, revealing a midget.

“Hothead! I’m here!” Taeyeon said, carrying two bags that entered the room with a delicious scent.

Yuri stood up from the couch, after covering Jessica with a blanket who looked like she was deprived of warmth. She watched Jessica sleep because she looked so peaceful.

“Morning Tae.” Yuri walked towards the girl. “That for me?”

Taeyeon smiled, glad to see Yuri was up with energy. “Ramen and Kkimbap.”

“I wanted desserts.” Yuri pouted.

Taeyeon scoffed, “No one eats desserts for breakfast, Yul.”

“I do.” Yuri plopped on the chair like a kid.

Taeyeon shook her head and began taking out the food. “I take it that you’re feeling much better.”

Yuri rested her chin on her hand. “Yeah, Jessica took care of me.”

Taeyeon nodded, knowing Jessica could be trusted. “Where’s Jesshika?”

Yuri peered behind her and pointed, “She’s sleeping on the couch.”

Taeyeon followed suite and saw Jessica passed out like a log.

“To have her here, it’s kind of unreal.” Yuri spoke with a sunken voice. “I didn’t think I’d have her this close to me, when the entire time I was trying to push myself away.”

Taeyeon began opening the bags, “She ran over here right when we called her.”

Yuri stared at Taeyeon, listening intently.

“I told her that I’ll stay and watch you since I live across the street, but she insisted on taking care of you.” Taeyeon sighed helplessly.

Yuri didn’t reply.

Taeyeon watched Yuri silently when the girl looked like she was in deep thought. “Yes, Yul. She was up the entire night being here for you.”

“This… This is why it’s so hard, Tae.” Yuri lost all her energy and placed her face flat on the table and muffled out. “Why is my life so hard?!”

Yuri continued to mumble about something, “What do I do? I can’t live like this!”

Taeyeon shook her head to herself, “I don’t know, man. This really needs to stop.”

Yuri scoffed into the table.

Taeyeon sighed helplessly at Yuri. Yuri was still facing flat on the table. Taeyeon began to think whether Yuri fell asleep like that or pitied herself to death.

“You know Yul, your condition was quite serious. It wasn’t some simple cold.”

Taeyeon went into Yuri’s kitchen and came out with a plate, placing the kkimpbap presentably. “What happened?”

Yuri lifted up her head and watched Taeyeon pass her a bowl of ramen. Typical Taeyeon, always straight to the point.

Yuri grunted and spoke quickly. “I went out in the middle of the night and these guys gave me trouble.”

“How many?”

“Five.”

“And?”

“Got all of them.”

Taeyeon smiled, “Nice.”

“But one,” Yuri lowered her head. “He hit me in the head with a bottle.”

Taeyeon nodded, “I see, so that’s where your pathetic Mickey Mouse band aid came to play.”

“Hey!”

Taeyeon sat down across Yuri, “If you’re troubled, you know I live across the street, right? We could’ve gotten sick together.”

“Huh?” Yuri stared at her confusedly.

Taeyeon’s eyes began to glimmer and shine, “Imagine if Ppany took care of me like the way Jessica did to you!”

“TAEYEON! YOU’RE GETTING BLOOD ALL OVER YOUR RAMEN!” Yuri ran to grab tissues and shoved them up Taeyeon’s bleeding nose.

Yuri plopped back down, “God, it wasn’t like that, you byun.”

While the two friends were bickering and eating, Jessica had woken and heard all of their conversation.

“What could be bothering you to make you go out in the middle of the night, Yuri?” Jessica whispered to herself. “I’ll find out somehow.”

Jessica yawned and stretched her limbs, and joined the two friends drowsily, “Morning Taeyeon.”

“Hey Jesshika,” Taeyeon greeted and continued sipping her soup.

Yuri could only stare at Jessica. She was beautiful even when she was drowsy from the long nap.

Jessica went up to Yuri and touched her forehead with her hand. Yuri stiffened. Her face blushing red. “You still have a little fever though. But, I think it’ll get better later in the morning.”

Yuri smiled nervously, trying to regain any composure she had left. “Thanks to you, I’ll be good as new.”

Jessica stared at Yuri, which had Yuri nervous and curious. “S-Sica?”

“Yul~” Jessica whispered. “Did you take your medicine yet?”

“W-What?  No, I didn’t.” Yuri’s voice came out feeble as expected.

“Yuri, what will you do without me.” Jessica teased and went to the kitchen.

Yuri stiffened a look to Taeyeon while Jessica was out of the room.

Taeyeon laughed pitifully at her friend, and took a spoonful of ramen. “You have it real hard.”

“See? There’s no way she could ever return my feelings. She only sees me as a friend. It just won’t happen, Tae.” Yuri ran her hand through her hair exhaustingly.

Taeyeon placed her utensils down, “I understand Yuri. You think your love will always be one sided, and it hurts, I get it. Especially since you’re close with Sica.”

Yuri sighed and said brokenly, “Part of me wants to let go and give in to my emotions, but another part of me knows it’s completely hopeless.”

“Yuri… Maybe, maybe it’s time to move on. Enough is enough, don’t you think?” Taeyeon’s voice softened.

“There’s no hope, huh?”

Taeyeon looked to the side hesitantly. “Well… I mean, there are other girls who would kill someone just to be able to date you.”

“She wouldn’t.”

"That's quite pessimistic."

"I'm not being pessimistic, Tae,  just realisitc." Yuri frowned, she wasn't sure if she even believed her own words.

Taeyeon paused in thought before speaking in caring way. “Whichever realistic choice you choose, I’ll be here.”

Jessica stopped in her footsteps. They were talking about her.

“Yuri… Still has feelings for me?” Jessica whispered, stunned in shock.

She was so in shock, the medication hit the floor as it fell from her hand.

“Is everything okay?” Yuri frantically entered and saw her medicine opened, scattered all over the floor.

Yuir noticed Jessica in a daze. “Sica?”

Jessica’s heart had stopped. It felt like an eternity before her heart started back up again. “I-I need to go.”

And by then, Jessica had already dashed out the door, leaving Yuri confused.

“What’s going on?” Taeyeon stood up when she saw Jessica leave the condo.

“Yul?” Taeyeon shook her friend. “What happened?”

Yuri slowly turned to face Taeyeon, “I don’t know.”

------

Jessica lied on her bed, staring blankly at the ceiling, her face still beet red. She quickly fished out her phone and called Tiffany to come over.

“Did something happen between you and Yuri?” Tiffany asked.

Jessica’s expression saddened a bit. “I… I ran from her…  I think because of that she’ll be mad.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing, Jessi. There’s no way that Yuri could really be mad at you, not with the way she feels about you.” Tiffany said, which made Jessica’s heart beat slightly faster. “Jessi, you could break her heart a million times, but she’ll keep on forgiving you.”

Jessica shook her head, this couldn’t be real. “Don’t tell me… You still think she’s in love with me?”

“Of course I do.” Tiffany gave her a warm smile. “I can see it in the way she looks at you and the way she’s always protecting you. “

Jessica looked into the distance upon the previous incident. “I really don’t see it. I mean… It’s Yuri… I just can’t imagine her still falling for someone like me.”

“Yuri cares for you too much to ever stay mad at you, just saying.”

Jessica’s voice dropped as she stared down at her lap. “I mean… I care for her a lot, too… It’s just… I have Taecyeon and care about him too…”

“UUUGGHH!! Will you stop with that!” Tiffany said fiercely. "How come you can never give a straight answer when it comes to the two fo them!?"

Jessica was shocked at the passion in her voice. 

“Don’t give up on something that makes you truly happy! Besides, this is something you should really think about! When will you realize it yourself?!” Tiffany glared at Jessica for a moment, then her expression softened.

Jessica turned away. She remained silent as she contemplated Tiffany’s words.

All she could sum up was, she couldn’t lose Yuri. She treasured Yuri too much to lose her.

Maybe she was being delusional, because she was still not truly honest of her feelings. But, Jessica did miss the old Yuri. Jessica missed the times when her eyes sparkled, and her face always held that gleeful expression.

“I don’t know…”

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kyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! >___<