Chapter 2

"Jeonghan" I stop behind the couch and turn to the man who called my name, my dad. He stands up but he didn't turn to face me. He moves and drop something on the coffee table. It's so loud, I thought the glass table will break. I move a little to have a look on what he had dropped, and my heart stops. My box. "What is this?" my dad asked. My mouth agapes, no words escaping. I jump on my place when my dad shouts, finally turning to me with his deadly glare. "I said what is this?!" "D-dad.." "Jeonghan, are you gay?" I gasped. Tears are forming on my eyes but I'm preventing them from falling. My heart beats again and it's crazy. I don't know what to say. I'm.. I'm scared. "Jeonghan, don't make me ask again!" I bite my lips and grip on my shirt. I'm really scared. My dad is so scary. He looks like the monster on the movies Seungcheol and I watched when we were 8. I can't control my tears anymore. I let them go as I stutter, "D-dad.. I-I'm s-sorry.." Just a seconds later, I'm wincing in pain. My dad grips on my hair as he pull me to my room. He pulls my hair to make me face him. "D-dad.. Stop! It hurts." I said in pained voice. But he slapped my face that makes me drop on the floor. I put my hand on my cheek. It really hurts! I thought I'm bleeding but I'm not.. not yet. He grip on my arms and pull me again to my bed. My hair is a disaster as well as my face. My left cheek is red with the trace of the man's palm and it's so wet because of my own sweat and tears. I know how I looks. This is exactly how my mom looked when they are still together, when she's still with me. Seungcheol run to me with his hands on his back and a wide grin on his face. I tried to smile but I can't. When he finally reaches me, he sitted on my side. "Hanie, happy birthday!" he cheers excitedly! But he frowns when he saw the expression on my face. "Why are you sad? It's your birthday." I release a long breath and force my self to smile. But I failed, I end up crying. I put my two hands on my face. It's just a second when I started crying but I can't breathe already. I felt a hand on my back and a head over my shoulder. Without removing my hand I told Seungcheol, "My mom is gone. She left me! She left me on my birthday! Seungcheol, my mom left me. She has a new family!" I heard him gasped in shock. Seungcheol tightens his hug on me and I finally remove my hands on my face to hug him back. "I'm sorry, Jeonghan. Just cry on me." and I did what he told me. I cried until I run out of tears. When I finally calmed down, Seungcheol pulled away and put his two hands on my face. "I have a gift for you. I hope this will make you happy." He removes his hand on my face and he reaches something on our side. With a sad smile on his face he said, "Happy Birthday, Jeonghannie!" He pull out a small Rilakkuma plushy infront of me. "Please take care of him. I can't be on your side always. So as a substitute, I will give this to you. When you're sad just hug him, I hope he can make you feel better. The same way my mom's pancakes do. The same way I do. Rilakkuma will not leave your side, I promise." Without any more thinking, I get the plushy from him and I pressed it over my chest. It's so soft and fluffy. It's also really cute like Cheolie. It's not hard to think that it's also Seungcheol, they are quite similar. I close my eyes and rocks my body from side to side as I hug Rilakkuma. It was so comforting, Seungcheol was right. And before I forgot about the real Choi Seungcheol, I open my eyes and finally on that day, on my birthday, I stretches my lips for a smile. I place Rilakkuma on my side then I look at Seungcheol. I leaned forward and pull him for a super tight hug. "Thank you, Cheolie! Thank you for making my birthday happy." "Jeonghan, I didn't raised you to be a gay! I raised you to be a man! A strong man!" He pulls my hair again making me throw my head back. "A strong man? Then what? Beat my wife until she leaves me! Hurt my children! Is that what you want me to do? To be like you? I don't want to! I don't want to be like you! You're a demon! I hate you!!" I shouted on his face. He slapped me again and I fell down on my bed. I just lay there and continue to sob. He left my room but after some moment, he came back. He throws on me the box where I kept all my letters for Seungcheol and all the stuffs he gave me. I pick up the pieces of papers and polaroids and some bracelets on the floor. I kept it all again on the box while crying so hard. When I'm done, I get my phone out of my pocket. I dialed Seungcheol's number several times but he didn't pick up. I got so frustrated, I throw my phone away. I get back to my bed. Before I lay down, my eyes fall on the plushy leaning back on the headboard of my bed. I reach for it and place it over my chest. I lay down and closes my eyes with the Rilakkuma still on my arms. "I will still love you, Seungcheol, though it really hurts."