Despite loving the stunning view of the beach in front of the café, Suzy sighed in annoyance as she glanced at her watch. She had managed to finish her business earlier than planned and thought of cancelling the hotel reservation, opting to go home instead. Maybe Chanyeol would reconsider giving her curfew if she came home now instead of the next day.

Why was he treating her like a teenager in the first place? He just added more reason for her to hate him.

However, the car just had to breakdown and now she had to wait in this decent café by the beach while Yixing took care of the car. In this quiet city of Naksan, it was hard to find such café. And it surprisingly had one of the best muffins Suzy had ever tasted. She was surprised Yixing know this place.

A few boring minutes later, Yixing showed up while fanning himself with his hand. He ordered himself an iced coffee before he sat down at the table with her.

"So the car's all good now?"

"No," Yixing answered while wiping beads of sweat on his forehead with the back of his hand. "It will take an hour or maybe more. I left the car at the repair garage to the repairman. We'll just have to wait. Are you sure you don't want to just rest here for the night?"

Suzy shook her head. "Chanyeol acted up again. I need to go home ASAP and change his mind."

Yixing nodded with a smile. "At least you both are talking."

Suzy scoffed to the side then seeped her tea. "More like fighting." 

"Oh my! Is that you, Lay?" A middle-aged lady who just entered the café excitedly exclaimed, apparently recognizing Yixing.

Suzy watched Yixing beamed and it made her wonder if he would ever lose that smile. If it was even possible.

"Hi, Auntie Lee! Long time no see!" Yixing stood up and bobbed his head before the lady hugged him.

"Oh my! You've grown up! The last time I saw you, you were still elementary, right? Right before you left with your family" The lady patted his shoulder. Suzy could almost see the hearts in her eyes. The lady then looked past his shoulder and at her. "Is she your girlfriend?"

Suzy subtly rolled her eyes while Yixing immediately denied with a chuckle. "No, Auntie. This is my boss. Auntie Lee is the café's owner," he explained to Suzy.

"You're so pretty!" The lady smiled at Suzy who silently replied with a bob of her head. "Ah, right!" She clasped her hand as she turned to Yixing again. "I'm going to bake your favorite blueberry muffin! You used to like watching me bake. Do you want to come and watch?"

Yixng smiled sheepishly; the smile so boyish, Suzy couldn't help but stare at him. "Will that be okay? Ah!" He suddenly diverted his attention to her. "Do you want to help Auntie bake? You like baking."

Surprised by the question, Suzy blinked. She should just coldly shut down the offer, but there was this part inside her heart that wanted to say yes. The childhood memory with her mom that she had buried deep inside were slowly crawling out.

"Can she, Auntie?"

"Sure! Why not!" The lady grinned wider then whispered, "I will even give you the recipe because you don't come here often."

"What do you think?" Yixing asked Suzy again. "Or do you want to just sit here?"

Clearing and looking away, Suzy finally replied, "It's getting boring sitting here. I'll just watch with you."

Yixing knew she wouldn't be able to just stand and watch at the side. Sooner or later, she would succumb to her inner desire to bake. As he had predicted, Suzy ended up helping to bake the muffins while he became a side helper. But what really impressed him was her smile.

He could see that she was trying hard to contain herself from smiling when she helped mixing the ingredients. But soon enough, she started smiling to herself when Auntie Lee complimented her skill. Yixing wondered if she realized she had been smiling all the while. Her smile was so addicting to look at. It was so astounding to him because he couldn't remember ever seeing her smile. She didn't even seem to mind some of the baking powder staining her face.

There was something childlike in how happy she looked that made him all warm inside. Gradually, her smile turned into a grin, and it knocked him out of his reverie. A realization came crashing on him when he felt his heart skip a beat whenever he saw her smile.

He's falling for her.

Quickly, he looked away to banish the thoughts. He shouldn't fall for her. He really shouldn't. He was wrong for feeling this way, and it pricked his conscience.

Suzy was not someone he should fall for. Never.

The sound of the wave crashing against the shore was such a satisfaction to her. Sitting at the beach after half an hour of baking, she watched the wave hit the white sand before the tidal ebbed. Yixing had given her his suit jacket for her to sit on earlier before he went to buy some drinks.

Being away from the office, her father, the house, Chanyeol, and just the busy city over all made it possible for her to let herself to destress for once. Suzy glanced at the box of some of the baked muffins beside her. She couldn't help but to smile at it. She couldn't remember how long it had been since the last time she baked something. Never had she thought that going back to the root of her childhood would be so satisfying. 

Could this be happiness? She really didn't know. But this feeling of satisfaction and fulfillment was almost overwhelming. It gave her the sense of ease.

For a brief moment, she closed her eyes and thought of spending the rest of her life here. Away from all the pressure. Away from her own ambition. Just living here quietly. She could buy a small house or an apartment. Then, she would just live to bake. Yixng could walk her home and cook for her and—

At the thought of Yixing, her daydream shattered and her eyes abruptly opened.

"Ugh! What was I thinking!" She pressed her palms to both sides of her head. "Seriously, Bae Suzy!" Clicking her tongue, she softly groaned. "Letting this unnecessary feelings take over is only making me think of stupid things!" And why Yixing? Why do I have to include him there?

Her goal. Her mission. Her ambition. Her grudge over her father. Suddenly she remembered how important they are again and how very useless her earlier thoughts had been.

When Yixing came back with water bottles, he sat beside her and silently join her watch the wave crashing the shore and the sky turning its color. She could imagine if it were Chanyeol beside her, he would have taken the silence as an opportunity to talk and to get her to talk. Just imagining it irritated her. Sometimes, she wondered if it was Yixing's naturally quiet bearing that made it easier for her to listen to him talk. Sure, the bodyguard was a little annoying too at times; but most of the times, he knew when to not bother her.

As a breeze blew by, for once Suzy was first to break the silence. "You lived here before?"

Yixing nodded; a small smile grazing his lips. "My parents came here from China. We lived here until my parents decided to
move to Seoul." 

"My mom was an orphan," he continued; his eyes kept on watching the view ahead where the sun slowly lowered from above. "But she was never afraid of dreaming big. She had always wanted to be a singer and performed in front of thousands of people. But life wasn't easy. She took different career choice instead, thinking that she would have another chance for her dream. She continued putting aside what her heart really wanted to do. There would be a next time, she thought."

A sigh escaped his lips as he looked up at the sky. "Life is cruel. She had throat nodules a year after we moved to Seoul, and it got worse. It eventually ended her dream. She realized there was never 'next time'. Long story short, she became depressed and ended her own life." His lips turned into a thin line as he lowered his head.

Suzy's eyes grew wide, truly stupefied. Suddenly she remembered that conversation they had when she told him she would kill herself if she lose against Chanyeol. He had told her not to do it or not to let him know of it if she did. Now she understood that look of loss and abandonment she briefly saw on his face back then.

That aside, she was more surprised by how similar they were. Because she too had lost her mother to depression.

Her heart was suddenly aching at the thought. The memory of her mom just wrenched her heart. Suddenly, she felt it hard to breathe. It was only a moment later that she realized it wasn't just an empathetic pain she was feeling but a very physical one. Her heart was rapidly beating, she gasped and clenched her chest.

"Are you okay?" Yixing rested a hand on her shoulder.

Suzy couldn't reply and only quickly rummaged her bag. Damn it! I left the pouch in the car—

She saw a hand offering her a tablet. Then, Yixing pressed it against her lips. She took it in and chew the tablet. Her heart was still in pain and beads of sweat started appearing on her forehead. She closed her eyes waiting for the effect of the medicine to kick in. An arm—she knew was of Yixing's—circled around her shoulders. Trying to bear with the pain made her head heavy and prompted her to rest her head on his chest for support without thinking through it.

With eyes squeezed shut, Suzy gripped his shirt in a fist and waited for the pain to subside. She could hear Yixing's soft breathing while he silently held her and gently her arm. Minutes passed and the pain slowly left. Her eyes fluttered open and she finally fully realized what she was doing.

She should be releasing Yixing now, but for some reason she did not want to. She remembered Chanyeol had once hugged her too. While at that time she didn't push him away because it was so sudden and felt so surreal to be held like that again after years; this time, she wanted to stay like this a bit longer because she just... wanted it. 

Suzy didn't know how to explain it. Being held by Yixing just gave her that feeling of comfort and... fulfillment. While yesterday it felt like almost, now it felt whole. She felt whole. It felt— For goodness' sake! Stop it, Suzy! She berated herself as she briefly squeezed her eyes shut again. Stop feeling and start thinking!

Nothing about this was right.

Slowly she moved away from Yixing.

"Are you okay, now?" Yixing asked while retracting his arm then rubbed his nape.

She cleared then nodded. "Yeah. How did you have that medicine with you?"

Yixing smiled. "I asked dr. Junmyeon to give me the prescription too so I can buy some. I'm your bodyguard. I need to be prepared."

Suzy just nodded and looked away.

"The car should be repaired now," he told her while standing up and dusting off the sand from the back of his pants. He gazed ahead and Suzy followed his line of vision as she stood up.

The setting sun greeted her sight. It slowly dipped lower and lower as if drowning into the sea, pulling down the light with it.

"Naksan is well known for its beautiful sunset." Yixing turned to her with a smile. "Let's go home." 

Suzy was knocked out as soon as she entered the car. She slept soundly on the passenger's seat beside him. After a long day, she could finally rest. 

"Why do you have to get beaten up for someone else?" His dad's voice turned his attention back to the line of traffic in front of him.

"Dad, it's my job."

His dad sighed on the other end of the call. "Yixing, you're the son of a successful businessman! You're my son! Why would you take up the job as a bodyguard? And when are you coming here?"

"Dad, you know Seoul is more of a home to me than Changsa is." Yixing held back a sigh and briefly closed his eyes. Despite his reluctance to inherit his dad's business, he knew he had to someday. Even if he didn't want to, he didn't have the heart to disappoint his dad. Opening his eyes, he glanced at the sleeping Suzy beside him. "I'll tell you what. Give me half a year to help my friend, then I'll go there and do what you want. Okay, Dad?"

"Fine," his dad relented with a sigh. "Why are you so adamant to help this friend anyway?"

Yixing leaned his head on the head rest before turning it to the side to look at Suzy again. "Because... I don't want anyone to end up like Mom."

"I don't know what you're talking about, but you better keep your word, okay? And please be careful. Besides your grandpa and grandma, you're the only one I have."

"Yes, Dad."

After ending the call, Yixing couldn't help but to glance between the road and Suzy from time to time. Realizing what he had been doing, he looked away and pursed his lips.

What are you doing, Zhang Yxing? He propped an elbow on the door and rubbed his upper lip with the index finger as he fell into deep thought.

Yixing had always been told that it was better to follow the heart. He knew from experience, that it was indeed true. He knew it was better to do what you really want. That was what listening to your heart all about. 

All this time, his heart always led him to what is right. But now... he wasn't so sure anymore. He didn't know that he should have been more careful with where his heart led him. He didn't really realize that there were lines to how far the heart should lead.

Suzy's smile earlier flashed in his mind and a sigh escaped his lips.

Why? Yixing gripped his steering wheel tighter and held back the urge to glance at her again. Why do I feel like I'm on the verge of crossing that line?

A longer chapter to compensate the previously shorter one.

When it comes to making decision, which do you follow: mind or heart?