- Ann's POV  -

Today is really tough. I've been doin lots of things through out the day starting from the little routine to the always nervous-wrecking moment when I should face those higher-up people, not to the level of becoming the main speaker, but nevertheless, I should still stand up on behalf of my father in front of them and I just cannot stay there standing still without talking to any of them. Definitely not, and I have to be a representative of the foundation we have established throughout these whole years regarding to the issue we would like to take an action to at least be a helping hand. I am getting this task more often lately, of course with someone by my side to help me out. I've been doin this for years since those days where I was simply there to accompany my father and completely did nothing. The activity itself is quite enjoyable. Being around people like them gives me so much learning and I am thankful for all of the chances I have. No, that is not the reason what make it tough right now, not at all. 

I see through out the window from my room. The view is really beautiful tonight. Cause I am staying at the penthouse on the toppest floor, the lighting from all of city lights, the sky scrapers, the the big moon above me.. Surely there not many stats visible to see, but still it doesn't lessen the charm. I am now alone, I am done with everything but still I have decided to stay a bit longer. I cannot go home. I am honestly not ready. Not with the shape of my heart at the time being.

I wonder how it has turned out this way.

It was so perfect, or so I thought...

It is not okay, we are not okay.

The sound from my phone distracts me and I get to see who is calling. It's Jaejoong.

"Hi, Jae..." I said.

I listen to what he says and can only see my reflection from the glass window in front of me. I hope that everything is just like the way he told me earlier, but the doubt I have inside is still there...

"I don't know... Jae, I just start to question everything. I think I just need some time to think it over."

He is not happy nor satisfied with my answer. I know that he loves me and really care about me. He is right that I cannot just run away like this, but I need it this space.

"No, I cannot talk to him right now. I'll be back, I promise. I'll call you. Bye.."

Not long after that a message pops out. It is said that everything is ready and I can leave tomorrow. Good bye, New York. Welcome, Dubai... It is nice to have an unofficial meeting with them here before and Siwon that had volunteered himself to accompany me between his tight schedule cause he has known them really well, in fact he had a visit as the ambassador he'd do later on and I had a chance to be involved straight in one of their occasions in Thailand with him which showed me trully how much they need our helping hands. He has to go somewhere else for another visit later on, I didn't join him, but it's always be a pleasure to have a familiar companion. It helps me a lot when I have to deal it alone now here, back in New York. 

Another call is displaying on my screen, it's him. For a moment I am just standing here and watching, waiting for how long he'll do it. The screen is off after a minute but he calls again. What happens next is the same, and it is repeated for I don't know how many times..

"Answer the phone, damn it.." a message is in.

"God, don't.. please, I am sorry.. just, .. just pick up the phone. Are you alright?" Another one is in.

"Ann.. please.." that's the last and a line of tears fallin from my eyes.

He calls me again and this time I pick it up.

"Ann.. " he called.

I just hear him without sayin a word, I may end up sobbing if I do. 

"I.. Talk to me, Ann.." 

I can hear how tired he is now, picturing how maybe he is sitting somewhere quite or maybe a corner in the hectic room he is in leaning himself back to the wall and closing his eyes. I hate to see him in this situation, but I am not okay myself.

"Changmin... I, I need some time to think it over."

It's silent for a while and I can hear how heavy his breath is right now. God, he's in the middle of his always crazy schedule, I am totally aware of that, but then...

"Is it the best for us to be together, Changmin? We were even better than this when we're just friends. Should we just remain so? As friends?"

"No! God! Please... I just..."

"I need some time, Changmin... I'll hang up now. Please, take care of yourself well."

- Changmin's POV-

I have never felt so frustrated like this before. I am on the verge of breaking down. I hold my phone really tight in my hand and in a second I just snap and throw it hard to the wall. Just cannot take it anymore.. It is shatered and I just don't care. I am about to punch the wall but a hand grabs it in time just before it reaches the target.

"What is wrong with you?" A simple question but it is delivered with a stern, controled voice.

I can see people start to leave the room one by one, I think Yunho has asked them to do so. He stares at me hard and I just takes my hand harshly. I am about to leave but he holds me back.

"We need to talk. You need to talk it over." He said.

God how I really want to leave the place. I just cannot control it anymore. I don't know what I can say to his face right now. My mind doesn't work well, it is in a total chaos! I may turn to be so aweful, so ugly in front of him and I just don't want to do it. I just cannot hurt more people, can I?

"This is why she left you! Stop shutting yourself off from everyone else, we're here for you. She's there for you but you pushed her away. You came to her before, I knew you did. But why not now?" He let go of his hold on me.

It was started when I got a news that she's in New York and guess what, she's not alone, it's Siwon. I saw some of the pictures from Kyuhyun when I visited him. He was checking out what his bandmate doin and Siwon sent them. Look, they even spent a few days there. She's not in any of the pictures posted on his social media, but it bothers me even more. It was not stopped there though, they also went to Thailand together for one of the Unicef program dealing with the children and I felt like I saw red. I was burnt in jelousy...

She didn't tell me that, I mean not in detail. I know she has started to learn to get more involved in their foundation nowadays which makes her travel a lot from place to place in the country or abroad. The connection her father has is incredible therefore the foundation has been doin really well and they are even starting to work together with Unicef. It is nothing profitable for them it is purely how they wanna give back for the society by helping those in need...

But my jelousy has gotten into me. I was so upset that I was so afraid I'd do something I'd regret. Those saying how they match each other, Siwon's outstanding family background and what he's been doin so far, even to the silliest thing like his skill in English. Damn it, I am also good at it and I have no problem with my family background. He as the representative for them makes him be the front person on display, to send the message, keep reminding people bout the awareness. It is something common to have people in our industy like us to be assigned in this area, like Yunho. He loves children obviously. It is shown as if I am not, nor I have a single care for it. It baseless. I just do it in my own way far from the public eyes. Yunho knows that, I think she knows that too but God, this talk from people really pissed me off! And talking about how Siwon told him how great their time there and I just got a hint how he is actually interested in her after that. Maybe it's just me or my jelousy but it's really sicking! Kyu had given me that look. Maybe he could sense it, and maybe a bit regreted it for not putting more filters in his story but I didn't say a word, I just left. 

Why didn't she tell me that she'd be there with Siwon? And what's with this spontanious trip to New York just with the two of them. It had nothing to do with Unicef, I know that for sure..

I just tried to get rid of my anger. Exercising, reading, drinking to the point of gettin myself worn out and down for a few days. Yunho knew I got sick, but he didn't know where I got my treatment and I just left my phone. We had a few days off anyway at that time. I knew what I did is wrong. I just need to collect myself together so I can deal with it with my clear and calm head. I don't know how much he knows about the matter at that time, but I was sure Kyuhyun told her about it, I don't know how he did it or how much he told her about it.

When I was back Yunho told me that she came, and she couldn't find me. She was woried cause Yunho just had a slip of his tongue and told her I was sick, but I was not ready to face anyone at that time.. She's not in Korea when I tried to meet her, the worst part was that she wouldn't pick up my call. I couldn't go and find her cause I had my schedule. It's killin me. She didn't even show up in Tokyo for our SM Town tour... 

- 3rd person POV -

"Why? She's willing to share everything with you. She's there opening her heart, her trust, she's there for you and hoping that you'll just do the same. Why can't you? Just because you don't wanna look terrible in front of her? Can you imagine how terrible she fe