§§§§§

The high rise building that Seona lived in loomed over him like a shadow, always on his tail, always at his back. The purpose of its architecture was to withstand mother nature’s raging weathers and very much like Seona, would never crumble.

Sehun entered and stepped into the elevator. He had chosen not to give Seona notice of his arrival in case it gave her the opportunity to concoct a plan he wouldn’t be able to rebuff. Knocking on her door he waited. She was in, he knew. A second later, as expected, the door unlocked and she looked at him undoubtedly surprised.

With a smile, “Sehun, what are you doing here?” widening the door she invited, “Come in.” as he entered she eagerly asked, “Do you want something to eat or drink?”

“A glass of water sounds nice,” he said walking into her kitchen and sat down at the table. His tactic wasn’t to be rude with her. Hwang Seona was very much the woman he first met at Soojin’s birthday party. Being mean to her wouldn’t change the outcome of anything. He still cared about her. Seona was still a precious memory to him and he had no wish to tarnish what they once had.

“You should have called,” Seona said sitting opposite him after getting his glass of water. “I look raggedly today.”

“You’re fine,” he told which had her femininely smiling. Settling hands on the table he locked his fingers, wondering how to go about what he came here for.

“For yelling at you the other day,” Sehun started, “I’m sorry about that. I was too hotheaded that day.”

“Oh no, don’t. It’s ok. I understand, I really do,” Seona assured and even if she was only saying it to make herself look good it didn’t matter.

Silence wound around them for the pending minute. Firmly pressing lips together, he stared at the glass of water then back to her. “I’ve been thinking for a while if I should get on my knees; how to best apologize to you. I know I wasn’t the best to you even when I first came to you.” He went quiet for a sole second. The next factor made him look horrible as a man and to many, he didn’t deserve forgiveness. “I cheated on you.”

“You didn’t.” She was at it again. Denial. He would never forget how devastated she was when he broke up with her and then pleaded for him. The transformation he had witnessed that afternoon was the moment she broke in half.

“Don’t forgive me,” he said and he meant it. “Get angry and hate me. You know, I’ve come to realize that I never deserved you. I was just a bit too immature. That’s why things just didn’t work. I wanted to believe I understood every part of you, and it’s not to say you’re a difficult woman. You’re great, you know? And you deserve so much more than what I can do. I’m so sorry, Seona. I couldn’t complete the role as your other half, I couldn’t move in with you, and I was disloyal.”

Gritting teeth together Seona gripped her hands into a fist on her lap. Tears feverishly dripped down her face angrily. “It’s not true! You’re still mine! You haven’t changed! You can’t leave me like this!”

Guilt.

Guilt.

Seona was so pain stricken that he didn’t know what else to say. This sole battle to move on was hers alone. There wasn’t anything more he could do.

Sliding his chair back he stood to his feet. “I’m going.”

Hurriedly dashing out of her seat she clung onto his arm before falling onto her knees. Clutching onto his pants she begged, “Don’t go. Please don’t leave me. I’m so sorry. I just want you to come back to me.”

Clamping his eyes shut to remind himself he was not here to comfort her but to end things. Heaving a deep sigh, he struggled free. Sehun would have walked away but he didn’t. Standing there, he listened to her continue to wail despairingly behind him and it tore his heart apart too. He was hurting but Namjoo hurt twice more.

“Bye, Seona,” he bid farewell before walking out.

§§§§§

“Are you waiting for a call?” Yunyeong wondered when she returned to their hotel room.

Namjoo turned away from the window where she’d been sitting and set her phone aside. “No.”

“I bought some juice,” her friend handed her a bottle.

Namjoo accepted the bottle and took a sip before turning to stare out the window. “My mom called.”

“Oh yea?” Yunyeong asked sitting down with her. “And what’d she say?”

Namjoo ran a finger down the side of the bottle. “They’ve been talking to a therapist. She thinks I should see her.”

“Oh…” Yunyeong went quiet then suggested, “maybe it’s not such a bad idea. Talking about your problems with someone might help you feel better.”

Namjoo rubbed her hand against her eyes and laughed bitterly, “My parents don’t even know what’s going on.”

“Maybe it’s time to open up about it,” Yunyeong said. “You’ve lost a lot of weight, you know. And I don’t think your emotional stress is just breaking you but it’s destroying you. Not everyone knows how to heal themselves. Maybe taking baby step towards getting some help won’t be so bad. Don’t be scared to face everything that’s happened. You have all of us here with you.” Wrapping an arm around Namjoo she said, “After that meeting lets go shopping.”

§§§§§

Loneliness crept in as he lay around the house those days without Namjoo. He didn’t know what to do. All he could dwell on was when they were still happily friends. Why had he been so ignorant until recently? He regretted so much.

Monday morning he woke up eagerly. He wanted to welcome Namjoo home as she walked through the doors. He waited an hour and some more until the clock struck closer to his work hour. Breakfast had been laid out on the table all ready for her. And every dish was her favorite too.

Giving up, he drove to work after packing the food carefully away. He wanted to call Namjoo but fearing that she wouldn’t answer he called Yunyeong instead. The friend answered after a few rings.

“Oh hey…it’s me,” Sehun started.

“Duh, I know.”

“Oh, I’m just...I’m just wondering if you guys are back from Ulsan,” Sehun said.

“We arrived this morning.”

He went quiet then asked what he truly wanted to know, “Why didn’t Namjoo come home?”

“We went straight to work,” Yunyeong explained.

“Why?” he didn’t work on keeping back the interrogative tone in his voice at bay. It bothered him, maybe upset him. That house was his and Namjoo’s house. It was the home their parents helped them get when they got married. She should have come home to him.

“I don’t know, it just happened,” Yunyeong ignorantly replied. “You can ask her when you pick her up later. I’m doing you a favor here. 4 o’clock right on the dot. You know right?”

“I know,” he smiled elated. “Thanks Yunyeong.”

There was gossip about him at work. Sehun didn’t have to confirm it, he just knew it from the way his co-workers looked at him. Their hushed whispers followed him down the hall until he disappeared into his office. He didn’t let it bother him, because on the brighter side Namjoo would be going home with him in a few hours. There was already too much to worry about that the work atmosphere couldn’t even compare to.

Sehun had lunch delivered to his office then packed up and left early, driving straight to Namjoo’s work place. Yunyeong’s car was recognizable in the parking lot. There were also a few other cars beside his. Curious to see Namjoo in action he stepped out of his vehicle and walked in. Through the front entrance the lobby larger in size than how it appeared outside welcomed him. His eyes traced the decorated tables and huge booklets sitting around accompanied by vases of fresh flowers and treats. Following the voices from down the hall he stopped by the entryway to see Namjoo and Yunyeong’s sister talking with a group consisting of a couple and some friends.

His heart gushed at the sight of Namjoo. Today she was wearing a pretty dress with hair neatly clipped back. The talk went on for some 10 minutes before the group dispersed. Namjoo was finally alone. It felt like the perfect opportunity for him then in the blink of an eye a man from the earlier group walked confidently up to her. Sehun watched heatedly as they chatted for a longer period of time, their eyes locked and smiling at each other. He fumed when Namjoo accepted the card he handed to her. When they parted Sehun went after him.

“Hey, you!” Sehun called out as he crossed the lot with an angry strut.

The man paused and turned to look at him confused. He was taller and Sehun hated to admit, handsome. “Me?”

“Stay away from her,” he warned. “She’s married.”

Frowning bewildered, the man entered his car and unable to stand his presence Sehun swiveled around toward his car. Sitting angrily behind the wheel he stared furiously at the front doors. How dare Namjoo accept the advance of some man?!

A few minutes later when she walked out with the duffle bag he got out of his seat and silently took the bag from her. Even if he was upset with her he was still determined to take her home with him. That was where she belonged. With him.

Sehun refused to speak to her along the drive home. He didn’t know what to say because all that scurried through his mind was how Namjoo had deviously smiled at that man when she refused to look at him, her husband, the same way. Turning into the driveway he snatched her purse and reached into the back for her duffel bag. Unlocking the door, he let Namjoo walk in after him. Instead of going upstairs to set her duffle bag down he walked right up to the table in the hallway and dumped the contents of her purse out.

“What the hell are you doing?” Namjoo demanded bewildered.

“Where is it?” Sehun mumbled going through her stuff on the table.

“Are you out of your mind? What are you doing!” Namjoo scolded reaching for her purse and began stuffing the contents on the table back inside. Catching sight of her wallet Sehun snatched it quickly. Opening it he glanced inside. The picture slot that once contained their picture was now empty. Then going through the card slots he spotted a particular one sticking out awkwardly.

“Is this his?” he interrogatively asked holding it out into her face. “He gave you this, didn’t he?”

Namjoo stared back at him with fire in her eyes. Her no answer was his resolute answer.

Tearing it up angrily Sehun snarled, “You get to meet a lot of men, don’t you? I swear if you ever smile at one of them ever again I’ll tear him up.”

Turning away he stomped off still fuming. Entering the bathroom, he tossed the remnants of the business card into the toilet and flushed it. Good riddance!

Exhaling deeply, he walked back out and into the kitchen to warm up the food he had wholeheartedly prepared that morning. Once the table was neatly set he stared down at the food. Dissatisfied he moved around a few plates so that the tastier dishes were closer to Namjoo’s side. Peering at the door he waited for her to walk in. When she didn’t he walked out to look for her. He was sure she hadn’t walked out. The door had neither opened nor closed. Going up the stairs he first glanced at the nursery. The door was closed. Namjoo wouldn’t have gone in there. Arriving in the bedroom he paused to see her duffel bag still on the ground. The water in the bathroom was running, so he sat down and waited.

Maybe he had gone out of hand earlier. Namjoo was most likely upset with him, but it was partially her fault. Did she not know that being with other men only enticed him to get jealous? He was still upset. She had talked so long with that guy, looking him in the eye and all. Damn that man.

His head shot up when the door opened. Namjoo walked out in a large shirt and sweatpants. Getting to his feet he said, “Lets eat.”

“I’ll do it after I clean up,” Namjoo mumbled tossing her clothes into the basket.

When she reached for the duffel bag he deepened his voice, “You can do that later. I cooked all morning for you. Lets eat.”

Namjoo shot him a glare before brushing by silently. She was already seated and had spoon in hand when he reached the kitchen. His insides squealed in joy because she was finally eating at last and with him. After dinner Namjoo went upstairs to clean up her belongings and that night she slept far away from him as usual, but he was happy because she was home.

Next morning, she got him angry again and she didn’t even do much. Other than not eating the breakfast he worked so hard on she was dressed in an outfit he disapproved of.

“Can’t you wear something different?” he asked as she walked past to grab a cup of coffee.

“I don’t want to.”

“I want you to,” he frowned aggravated. One look at her skirt had him going angry. Was she asking for men to gawk at her? She was married and his wife! “Wear something else.”

After pouring her coffee she only glanced at him through narrow eyes then walked out of the kitchen. Sehun sighed frustrated. Appetite destroyed he put his breakfast into the sink and walked out. Namjoo really didn’t change into another outfit when he went outside. She was really set on going to work looking like a single woman. Was it to intentionally make him angry?

Like yesterday, he drove silently without a word. Was that same guy yesterday returning to her agency today? Was that why she had pampered herself up? The thought aggravated him so much he ended up speeding down the road and gripping onto the wheel so hard his knuckles went white. When he pulled into the parking lot of her workplace he stepped out of the car with her. Like hell he would allow his wife to go into work like that.

Insistently following Namjoo around the car he shrugged off his expensive blazer. Following Namjoo’s wishes he didn’t touch her but wrapped the blazer around her waist, pulling her forth as she struggled back in order to knot the sleeves around her.

“What the hell are you doing?!” Namjoo raised her voice.

Stepping back satisfied Sehun gave her a once over. “There,” he muttered to himself, “that looks better.” Looking her in the eyes he said, “I dare you to take it off and see what happens.” Receiving her hot glare in return he turned around to step back into his car. Their eyes locked into a heated battle as he reversed then drove away. God, he was so angry with her.

Sehun walked into work tugging on his tie. He probably looked out of place without his blazer but then it wasn’t like anyone could say anything about his wardrobe. Stepping into his office he sat down and got right to work. It had only been two days since he’d blown up at Seona in his office, but ever since that day there were a few things he had come to notice. Not just the gossip spreading around the office about his personal life, but that he was now kind of ostracized.

To be honest, Sehun tried not to bother much with it but that was impossible. This was his workplace and those people he saw every day. Since his first work day he had been known as reliant and honest. If that overturned, he would be the liar and outcast. In the end, it wasn’t a very simple thing. His reputation in the workplace would be bad and might affect him in the long run, which would be troublesome if his future bosses were to hear.

Not that he and Seona were an item, but everyone saw or at least knew that she clung onto him like they had some kind of thing going on. Sehun was confident that everyone knew he was married. The band on his finger was as obvious to day as the sun, even if he didn’t mention Namjoo at work. His boss knew, the department manager, and the head of the department all knew about Namjoo. They had seen her picture in his wallet during lunch one day. Even so, that didn’t solve everything.

Seona was back at work. He saw her but they didn’t talk. If she said things about him, it probably couldn’t be helped. After all, he had done all he could.

There was a knock on his door. After a second the department manager poked his head in. He was a kind elder who was a little older than his father. Sehun often thought of him as a caring grandfather. He was the one who had excused him the day he’d blown up at Seona. If he had come to say anything to him, Sehun wouldn’t hold anything against him.

“Good morning, sir,” Sehun got up to greet.

“Sit down, sit down,” the man waved him down.

Returning to his seat Sehun wondered, “Is there something I can help you with this morning?”

“Don’t worry about that. Everything’s fine,” the department manager assured. Entwining his hands together he settled them on his belly as he leaned back in his chair. “How’s everything at home?”

“It’s fine,” Sehun lied with a smile. It wasn’t like he could tell the truth.

The elder man nodded his head. “Did you receive the e-mail I sent you?”

“I didn’t get a chance to look at it yet,” Sehun said and began reaching for his mouse but stopped when the department manager said, “It’s ok. Don’t worry about that right now.”

Sehun turned attention back to him. “What?”

“I heard you’re about to graduate from university,” the elder started.

Sehun nodded.

The man went quiet and Sehun felt his stomach begin to drop. “I’ve been looking into places to transfer you. Do you think you can consider those?” Sitting up he straightened his back. “I’m not about to pry into your personal life or give you a lecture, but you know things like that shouldn’t come into the workplace. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“I know.” His voice was quiet.

Standing up the elder tugged on his jacket and kindly urged, “Think about it and let me know. I can put in a good word for you.”

***Well, in the end, Seona has taken everything from Sehun: Namjoo's faith and his job.