A/n: I was listening to The World Is Ugly and Cancer by MCR after finding out my grandfather has 2-4 weeks left to live. Those two weeks turned into 4 days and he died the night I finished this, the day after my birthday, then my other grandfather passed 56 hours later. For some reason, writing is the only way I can stay sane. Happy Birthday to me.

    Junhui blinked slowly; confused. His eyebrows knitted together as he looked up from where he was staring at his hands. “W-what?” He gulped.

     “1 month…at most.” Mingyu told him. “Wonwoo wanted to tell you himself but…y’know.”

    “What?” Junhui’s voice broke. “what?!”

     Mingyu reached out a hand and placed it on the others knee. Minghao was sitting beside Jun, and wrapped his arms around his shoulders from the side. “I'm sorry Jun.” the younger said.

     Junhui pushed Minghao off of him, abruptly standing up. “I-i’m-i'm going to be sick.” And the Chinese boy ran to the bathroom, his friends wincing at the violent wrenching sounds coming from down the hall, seeming to only echo in the silence of small apartment.

~

    “He’ll need end of life care. Take him home, make him comfortable.”

    “Come live with me…please…” Junhui begged his boyfriend, holding onto his thin, frail and pale hands. “Please…”

    “Jun…baby…” Wonwoo spoke softly. “I can't do that too you. I'm going to go back home.”

     Jun looked down, tears b at his eyes. “Bu-t…I love you…you can't-I can't be away from you…we only have 3 weeks left.” Tears rolled down his cheeks and turned his eyes red, but he was too focused on Wonwoo to notice, or care.

    Wonwoo bit the inside of his cheek. “I want to move back in with you…I really do. But I can't-I can't have you be the one to wake up and find me one day.”

    Junhui walked forward, leaning down to press his forehead against the Koreans. He took a breath; it shuttered underneath his ribcage, shaking him. He didn't know what to say, who really knows what to say at a time like this. He leaned down and kissed Wonwoo lightly on the lips. “I'm going to go over everyday okay?”

    “What about work?” Wonwoo whispered, tears starting to fall out of his own eyes, he only cried in front of Junhui, leaving him was the hardest part of it all-knowing Jun would have to be alone, would be hurting over him for probably forever; and not letting himself move on for God knows how long.

    Junhui sniffled, finding that he sounded pathetic but not caring in the slightest. “I took time off...that understood.”

    “Jun-”

    “No. Stop. It's fine. Really, I can go a month without working.” Wonwoo nodded and pulled Junhui to lay on the hospital bed with him. “I love you Wonwoo.”

    “I love you too Jun.”

~

    Wonwoo smiled when he saw Junhui enter his bedroom, a bouquet of roses in his hands, Wonwoo’s mother following with a vase filled with some water. “Good afternoon baby. How are you feeling today?” His mother placed the case in Wonwoo’s desk, Junhui placing the flowers in after, then walking towards Wonwoo to plant a kiss on his forehead.

    “I feel better.” Wonwoo said, his voice week, not as deep and heavy as it had once been. “Whatever pain meds they gave me helped a lot. It really makes a difference.” He tapped his lips to tell his boyfriend to give him a real kiss. Junhui agreed.

    Junhui sat himself on the bed beside his lover. “I'm glad.” He smiled and ran his fingers through the others hair. “I wonder what you woulda looked like bald.”

    Wonwoo laughed weakly. “Well, sadly chemo won't help; so we’ll never know.”

    “I'm gonna shave your head in your sleep.”

     Wonwoo hit Junhui’s arm. “You will not! I’ll kill you if you do!”

    Junhui laughed loudly. “Do it, we’ll be the Romeo and Juliet of Seoul.”

    “Who’s who?” Wonwoo asked, grabbing Junhui’s hand and rubbing the back with his thumb.

    “I'm obviously Romeo! I mean, I’m and expert and seduction.” He flashed the iest smirk he could muster and Wonwoo just rolled his eyes in response and sighed.

    “I think you more of a Juliet actually…”

    “Because I'm pretty?” Junhui smiled.

    “Because you're the dumb one.”

     Junhui feigned hurt. “Hey!” Then he laughed.

~

    Wonwoo had felt minimal pain the past few weeks, soa couple days later, when Junhui went to his boyfriend's family home, Wonwoo was sitting in the living room; watching tv and having a bowl of soup.

     “What are you watching?” Junhui asked.

     Wonwoo blushed. “Boys Over Flowers…”

    “Oh my God babe. I thought you had good taste!” He plopped himself on the couch beside his boyfriend.

     Wonwoo pouted. “I do…I just wanted to watch it; I never have. I feel like it's something I need to experience before I die.”

    Junhui's smile fell and he wrapped his arms around Wonwoo’s fragile frame. “I love you.”

     “I love you too babe.”

~

    Junhui opened the door to Wonwoo's bedroom with a big smile; Wonwoo’s mother following behind. Wonwoo breathing had been bad the past few days, and the medication had Wonwoo confused and trying to get himself out of bed, often falling; Junhui did his best to spend as much time with him as possible. “My Wonwoo has been so tired lately. How are you feeling today?”

      Wonwoo looked at him confused. His breathing very slow and looked painful. “What?”

    “I asked how you're feeling.” Junhui said and sat in the chair beside Wonwoo's bed, grabbing his hand.

    Wonwoo closed his eyes, opening them then blinking slowly, as if to clear his vision. “Who are you?”

    Junhui was taken aback and dropped Wonwoo's hand as if he’d been burned. “I'm sorry. I hoped he’d recognize you. But…he woke up today and didn't know who I was, or his father, or Mingyu.” Wonwoo's mother told him. Wonwoo closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep again.

   “But-but- he doesn't have memory problems.” Junhui let tears fall down his cheeks as he stared at his dying lover.

    Wonwoo's mother placed her hand on Junhui's shoulder. “The doctor said it can happen. They think he might have a few hours left at most.”

    Junhui looked up at Wonwoo's mum. “H-hours?” His voice broke on the word. Wonwoo's mother nodding, then looking too the door as Wonwoo's father walked in, also coming to stand beside Junhui. “But-but-we were supposed to have a month. It's only been two weeks-” a sobbed escaped his throat and his body lurched forward. Wonwoo's father hugged Junhui.

    “I'm sorry Jun. But we’re so glad that Wonwoo has had you the past 5 years. We got to have another son too.” Wonwoo's dad said.

    Wonwoo's mother kissed Junhui on the forehead. “But right now let's be strong for him okay? We can cry after…” Junhui nodded pathetically and sat up, sniffling and dried his tears.

~

    Junhui refused to leave the house that night. Sleeping in the chair beside Wonwoo's bed. In the morning, Wonwoo's mum came in to wake Junhui and offer him some breakfast. Then she returned an hour later to gather the still full plate, and watched Junhui plead with her still sleeping son.

     “Wonwoo…I love you so much. I don't want you to go but you need to okay? You're in so much pain…let go…it's okay.” Jun sniffled. “We won't be angry at you.”

    Wonwoo coughed, and blinked his eyes open. “I'm not going to go just yet.” His voice hoarse from sleeping for 18 hours straight.  Junhui's looked at Wonwoo with hope in his eyes. “I didn't say my goodbyes yet…” And Junhui looked down again, tears falling into his and Wonwoo’s joined hands.

    “Wonwoo…” His mother whispered, moving hair off of his forehead.

    “I love you so much mummy. And daddy too.” His mother nodded, and stood back so Wonwoo could say what he needed to say to his boyfriend. “Junhui; you're the love of my life okay?” Wonwoo said. “I know that for a fact. But, I’m not yours. You're gonna fall in love again with someone great, and I'm gonna be so happy for you okay? Because you're gonna get another chance. You made the last few years of my life the absolute best. You made me feel loved. And that's the best thing I could ask for. I love you so ing much.”

    “It's not fair.” Junhui whimpered. “It's not fair.”

     “It's what God wants. I'm done whatever I needed to do in this life. You still have more to do. Share your love with the world.” Wonwoo started to cry, and he reached out a shaky hand to caress Junhui's face.

     “You saved me Wonwoo…you saved me.”

      “You saved me too.” Wonwoo pulled Junhui towards him weakly, to give him what he knew would be the last kiss they ever shared. “Now don't you dare make us become the Romeo and Juliet of Seoul.” Wonwoo laughed and Junhui let out a half laugh, half sob. “Please tell Mingyu that he was the best friend a guy could ever ask for, and tell dad I love him so much…” Junhui nodded, climbing onto the bed beside Wonwoo. “I'm gonna go back to sleep now, okay?”

      Wonwoo's mum walked forward and placed a kiss on her sons cheek, her own eyes filling with tears. “Goodnight, my sweet baby boy.”

      “Goodnight.” Wonwoo responded.

      “I love you.” Junhui whispered into Wonwoo's shoulder.

     “I love you too.”

~

    An hour later, Mingyu was playing video games with his own boyfriend; Seunggwan. When his phone rang. “Hello?” He asked. Not looking st the caller ID before picking up, too invested in his game.

     “Wonwoo wanted me to tell you that you're the best friend a guy could ask for.” He heard Junhui's voice on the other end, followed by sniffles.

     Mingyu paused the game. “What?” He questioned, voice small. He knew what was coming.

     “He's gone.”

A/n: so basically I'm quite depressed again lol everything is wonderful I just want to die