Watching Jackson perform live, in front of thousands of his fans, was an experience that Mark knew he would never forget. The passion and joy that oozed from his entire being while on stage showed, making it impossible for Mark to take his eyes off him. He was an intoxicating presence that dared anyone to look away. Clearly no one in the entire building was strong enough to do anything else.

Seeing the smile stretched across Jackson’s face and giggles that escaped his lips almost made Mark forget about all the times the boy thought about quitting. He almost forgot about how many times in just the past few months alone he’d considered leaving it all. “It’d be nice just to have a normal life, you know?” he’d say. “To go to the airport without worrying someone might get trampled because of how many people follow me around. Or just walk to the store at the end of the street without having a stranger try and talk to me when all I want to do is just eat my damn food. Be able to go out with you without caring about who might see.”

All the things Jackson endured because of his fans sounded unbearable to Mark. He’d never blamed Jackson for wanting to leave that life behind. But now, seeing with his own eyes how much Jackson loved what he did, Mark would never let him quit. Not if he could help it.

Even once the three boys had exited the stage for good after their second encore reappearance, fans still lingered for a few minutes. The hope they had to see their favorites even just one more minute was impressive, to say the least. Jackson’s parents got escorted backstage almost immediately, doing their best to slip away before the fans had time to line up for pictures with them. Seeing just how many people watched them and yelled their names as they walked away, Mark understood why they were in such a hurry.

He decided to stay back while the fans slowly started to file out of the arena. A few of the more die-hard fans recognized him, asking him for pictures and trying to strike up conversations. He hesitantly agreed to the pictures, but couldn’t understand most of them enough to even understand their greetings, let alone any questions they asked him. Even if they did speak English or Mandarin, he pretended he didn’t understand, hoping they’d just leave him alone. He never wanted to be recognized by strangers, let alone anything close to famous. He wasn’t about to start accepting the responsibilities, either. He wasn’t mean or rude to any of the fans, he just didn’t try to talk to any of them.

The requests were few and far between, though. He watched groups of girls walk out together, all of them holding banners and fans and slogans with Jackson’s face printed on them. There were some that had Yugyeom or BamBam merchandise instead, but Mark barely even noticed them. They all laughed as they left, pointing and dancing as they walked, reliving some of their favorite moments from the past few hours. He knew that some of them probably even considered this one of the best nights of their lives, just because they got to stand in the same building as Titan, breathing the same air.

They lived for the trio.

Mark didn’t even realize he’d been lost in his own thoughts until he felt lips on his neck. He jumped a few inches out of his seat, leaning away from whoever had just kissed him until he turned to see Jackson’s grinning face leaning over from the row behind him. “You scared me,” Mark muttered as his body melted back into his chair. The idol just laughed, nimbly hopping over the chairs to take a seat next to Mark. The arena buzzed with the sounds of the tear-down crew, already working away at disassembling the entire production. It was strange seeing all the work that went into such a seemingly simple thing like a stage or a row of lights. Everything was more complex than it seemed.

“What were you thinking about?” Jackson asked. He didn’t bother to look at Mark, instead focusing on the mess of workers below as well.

“I don’t know,” Mark admitted. “I guess I’m just processing everything. You have a lot of fans.”

Jackson nodded. “Did they scare you?”

It was a question that most people would expect to be asked as a joke. Something that famous people laughed about when the masses weren’t around. But Jackson was 100 percent serious.

“They intimidated me, I guess,” he said. “They know so much about you. They really love you.”

Sighing, Jackson turned to look at Mark. “They don’t know anything about me. Not really. They only know what I let them know.” He glanced down for a second to find Mark’s hand, picking it up in his own, before looking back up. “They don’t know me like you do.”

Mark tried to bite back the laugh that raised up in his throat, but he couldn’t hold it all back. A quick snort burst out. “I’m not worried they’ll take you away or something, Jackson,” he said, trying not to let his voice be laced with laughter. He squeezed the boy’s hand lightly, letting himself be reminded that they were finally together again.

“Good,” Jackson replied. His grin had turned to a slightly-embarrassed smile, eyes darting away every now and then. “You know no one can replace you. You’re it for me.”

“I know.” It was all Mark could bring himself to say.

“Anyway, I had to come find you before we left,” Jackson continued. Mark raised a brow questioningly. The way Jackson said “we” made it sound like he wasn’t included. “I’ve gotta leave separately with the guys, since we have to go do some post-concert debriefings and stuff, but it won’t take too long. We’ll be back in like an hour or so to take you and my parents out for a late dinner. Is that okay?”

Mark smirked and looked down at their hands, woven together so naturally. The way Jackson checked in with him, even about things he could control like business meetings, made his insides warm up a little. He hated being apart from Jackson, knowing how little time they had together to begin with, but he couldn’t expect to demand every second of his attention. “As if me saying no would make any difference,” Mark joked, the edges of his lips curling up into a sad smile.

“I mean, I haven’t ever had a diva outburst before. Maybe I could start tonight,” he joked, leaning in to press his lips against Mark’s. “I’m sure Bam and Gyeom will be fine on their own,” he muttered between kisses. “Get us a little more alone time.”

Laughing, Mark pushed Jackson back. “You can’t just stop doing your job because I’m here,” he said. Jackson opened his mouth to say something, but Mark continued before he could utter a word. “I’m sure the others are waiting for you. Go. I’ll wait for you to finish up. Just don’t take too long. I leave tomorrow morning.”

Jackson’s eyes widened. “You expect me to go anywhere without you when you’re leaving tomorrow?” he whined. “I can’t do that. I’ll barely even get to see you.”

The voice didn’t work on Mark. He’d heard it too many times over the phone and on video chat. Jackson always whined when he complained about how they never got to see each other or about how unfair it was that they had to live on the opposite side of the world. Mark just stood up, pulling Jackson up with him, and wrapped his arms around the idol’s chest, pulling him close. “We have all night to spend together,” he said, voice muffled since he’d buried his face in the crook of Jackson’s shoulder. “I promise I’ll wait to sleep until I’m on the plane.”

Arms slid around Mark’s waist and lips pressed into his hair. “I’ll make the meeting quick,” Jackson whispered. Mark moved back just enough to look Jackson in the eyes, and nodded. They both leaned in, neither really initiating the kiss rather than just letting themselves pull each other in naturally, only to break apart sooner than either of them liked.

They separated in silence, letting their arms drop back to their sides like limp noodles as Jackson slowly made his way back toward the backstage area. He glanced over his shoulder a few times, smiling and waving, even blowing an overly-exaggerated kiss once before disappearing behind the large metal doors leading to one of the many staircases.

Mark sighed, feeling an ache in his chest that was different than any other he’d felt before. It was painful and sharp, like what he usually felt when he had to watch Jackson leave, but there was a dull, throbbing undertone that spread across his entire chest and made it hard to breathe.

He needed to get back to his hotel room. He needed to drink some water and lie down. He needed to figure out how everything had changed within such a short time.

There's so much to say. >< First off, this chapter was initially meant to cover more, but I cranked out this much in one sitting and it had been so long since I updated, so I figured I may as well split what I meant to initially write into two chapters so that I can share this part with you all now.

Thank you to everyone who's been patient with me concerning these updates. I know that they're taking longer and longer for me to post, but there's been a lot going on in my real life that has taken me away from writing either literally or in spirit. To be honest, at the end of 2016, I wasn't even sure if I was going to finish this story. I knew how it was all going to end and I sort of got burnt out. Writing a 2k+ word chapter that I see as acceptable to release to all of you is a battle with myself each and every time around. So you can see how after writing 18 chapters in a year, it got a little overwhelming. I didn't have a lot of confidence in what I was writing (I still don't, but that's a personal battle I think I'll always have to fight) and I was, honestly, a little fed up with the fandom as a whole. The drama got to be too much and I just distance myself. I found other things to enjoy. I started reading actual books again.

Basically, I needed to just step away from everything for a while. Before today, I honestly hadn't even looked at my Bringing Color documents once since I released the last chapter. But today, I guess I got inspired again. I got that drive back to finish what I started. So here we are! With this update now split into two, there's about 7 more chapters before BC will be at an end, and I really want to finish it.

I've got more time on my hands these days, so hopefully you won't have to wait a whole month, let alone two, for the next update. ;)

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