Chapter 18

Save Me From Myself
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Yongsun leans against the back of her bus seat, dabbing the perspiration that has formed a misty sheen on her forehead. The sweaty guy sitting next to her makes her mood more foul than it is already - the weather is so damned hot, and here she is on a twenty minute bus ride, possibly having to endure this hell stink for the ride entirely? She pulls a makeup kit out of her bag and checks her appearance, which, is, of course, as flawless as usual.

 

Just kill it like you always do, Yongsun. The heat should bow down to you, not the other way around. She thinks coolly, opening her bag and dropping the makeup kit back inside. She fishes her IPhone 6 from one of the bag’s inner pockets and turns it on. The lockscreen wallpaper - which used to be a selfie of Solar and Jaehyuk, is now just some generic pink sunset picture Yongsun had snapped a few days ago. She smiles viciously when she sees it. And she smiles even more viciously when she unlocks her phone and checks her calendar.

 

‘Meeting with Jaehyuk’s mother at 2:30pm’ is the only thing she'd added to her calendar at all that wasn't added by Solar. The self-satisfied smile doesn’t quite leave her lips as she slips the phone back into her bag again.

 

Regaining control of herself had been a relatively simple thing to do now that she’s determined to live as herself once more, not in the shadow of Solar - after all, her dark days were over. She doesn’t really know why she’s become less averse to living now, especially because her life seems to be no different than it was before, but she won’t complain. After all, who wouldn’t want to be motivated in life?

 

The ride through the busy streets of Seoul helps to calm her down, because yes, Kim Yongsun does get nervous too. She’s also human, however much she acts like a person devoid of any feeling besides rage, though that is still mostly true. She’s rehearsed some points she’s going to bring up, though she’ll keep it short. She has a feeling that Mrs Kang Jinae doesn’t like beating around the bush, which is a trait that Yongsun herself possesses and appreciates. After all, why waste everyone’s time when you can just spit it out in a few words?

 

The bus approaches her stop in central Gangnam. She makes a displeased noise in as she taps the sweaty guy on the shoulder and squeezes herself past him, his vastness hardly leaving her room to maneuver her way out of that trap. Thank Gods the guy didn’t molest her or anything. She really doesn’t want to be bothered with screaming and getting the police on him.

 

She presses the button on the pole next to the exit doors, and a sign at the front of the bus lights up to indicate that she’s getting off at the next stop.

 

The bus rumbles to a stop and the doors swish open. She steps out onto the sidewalk, sheltering her eyes from the harsh afternoon sun. The transition from cold to hot instantly makes her feel even warmer than she should be feeling. Sighing deeply, Yongsun makes her way to the nearest traffic light to cross the road.

 

Jaehyuk’s parents own a sizable chain of electronic stores, though they are never at the stores themselves - they work at the central building located near the edge of Gangnam’s business district. The office building is directly opposite the bus stop where Yongsun now stands, and she raises her head to look at the formidable building with its tinted glass windows and modern structure. HJKang is spelt out on the front of the building.

 

“Rich,” Yongsun mutters, as the traffic light turns green and she walks briskly across the road. She’s pretty sure that she’d be able to repel oncoming cars with her aura alone, but she isn’t taking any chances by crossing slowly.

 

The distance between the huge office reception area and the bus stop is thankfully short, so Yongsun hasn’t broken a sweat at all when she arrives at her destination. She walks right up to the reception counter, and since one of the receptionists is on the phone, she opts to go to the other. The lady looks up as she approaches and Yongsun sees the bored look on her face.

 

“I’m here to see Mrs Kang Jinae,” Yongsun says politely.

 

The lady gives her a once-over and then her eyes travel slowly back to her face. Her voice is curt and overall rude. “Did you make an appointment? You need an appointment if you want to see her. She doesn’t just see any random-”

 

“I have an appointment. Kim Solar, two thirty pm,” Yongsun cuts in, her eyes turning from polite to fiery in a second. The pleasant smile drops from her face, so that she looks less like an angel and more like a correspondent of hell. “And I suggest you check your databases quickly, because I’d hate to waste my time here.”

 

The receptionist looks duly subdued as she does a search on her database. Once or twice she glances, sees the hellfire burning in Yongsun’s eyes, and quickly casts her eyes back down again. She her lips and says, “Kim Solar, two thirty pm. Okay. You can go up by those elevators over there, Mrs Kang’s office is on the highest floor, second door to the right. Have a nice day!”

 

Her words end off with a squeak when she sees Yongsun turn her frosty gaze upon her. Yongsun nods and walks to the elevators without saying anything else. She knows she’s rude, but some people do have to be taught a lesson a times. It’s fine if she’s having a bad day, but she doesn’t have to be an either.

 

One of the elevators is already on the ground floor, so she gets into the empty elevator and jams her thumb against the close button. Then she presses the number twenty button and the lift jerks as it begins to ascend.

 

Yongsun leans against the wooden railing running along the glass walls of the lift. She irons out her expression, relaxing her facial muscles so that isn’t pulling downwards and her eyebrows aren’t scrunched. Then she tries for a small polite smile, and a more friendly raise of the eyebrows, and a less murderous look.

 

The elevator glides to a stop at the top floor. Yongsun brushes herself off and steps out as the doors slide open, the sound of her heels clacking against the cold marble making her smile widen. She finds the door to Mrs Kang’s office right away, and she straightens up before knocking on the door five times. A voice barks from within. “Come in!”

 

Yongsun pulls the door open and steps inside the spacious office room. One side is floor-to-ceiling glass panels, with expensive-looking curtains. The floor is the same marble as the outside, though there’s a rug on the ground where the huge mammoth of a desk lies in front of a towering bookcase. All in all, your typical modern CEO’s - or CEO’s wife’s - office.

 

Yongsun has to give it to her, though - Mrs Kang is the epitome of a woman who is very well put together. Even in her late fifties with greying wisps of hair she looks refined, her clothes crisp and impeccable and very presentable. Of course, not like she makes Yongsun feel underdressed, because Yongsun herself is wearing a formal button-down blouse and a pencil skirt.

 

Mrs Kang looks up as Yongsun enters and closes the door behind her. There’s a moment of confusion, before that clears up, leaving behind a sour and completely displeased look. “Ah, Solar.”

 

“Mrs Kang,” Yongsun says graciously, trying not to make her smile any wider. Oh, this will be easier than she thought. She can tell that Jaehyuk’s mother does in fact already loathe Solar. Loathing is a great thing for her - that means that she's more likely to eat up any bull story Yongsun can come up with as long as it sounds sane and valid.

 

“What are you here to talk to me about?” Mrs Kang asks directly, shutting her laptop. However much she dislikes Solar, Yongsun notices, she’s still pretty gracious.

 

Yongsun goes over the points she must take special note of again in her mind. Do not mention anything about her having dissociative identity disorder. Stress that she should not have her reputation ruined - she doesn't want to lose her job from this.

 

“This is regarding Jaehyuk and S- my wedding, Mrs Kang,” Yongsun says, and she knows she’s gotten Mrs Kang’s attention already. The older woman’s look of displeasure deepens even further.

 

“If you are here to ask me for my blessings, girl, you won’t have any. I may love my son and want him to be happy and have the best in life, but he can do better than a simple accountant with not much wealth or power to her name.”

 

Everything she’d said would’ve been a low blow to Yongsun, had she not given a single flying horse turd about her ‘relationship’ with Jaehyuk. It still rubs her the wrong way, though, and makes her dislike Mrs Kang even more, because really, wealth and power?

 

“No, it’s nothing related to asking for blessings. In fact, what I’m here to talk to you about is related more to the second point you raised,” Yongsun says, forcing herself to sound slightly sad - which isn’t easy, mind you - because she’s sure that people would sound sad in these situations.  

 

Mrs Kang is intrigued now, and Yongsun can see it.

 

“I agree with you. I’m just a lowly accountant with no wealth or power to my name. I’m no match for Jaehyuk at all. What you said. Which is why - however much I love him - I don’t think I want to carry on with the wedding anymore,” Yongsun blinks quickly to make it look like she’s blinking away tears. Mrs Kang leans forward slightly, her hands clasped on her mahogany tabletop. Her eyebrows pull to the centre of her forehead.

 

“What did you say?”

 

“I don’t want to carry on with the wedding anymore. I realise that there’s no point in us marrying if we will always live in a shadow of unhappiness - he is upset over your unwillingness to accept me. And I know that it isn’t good for him to marry someone who might prove to be mentally unstable. I, however, respect your opinion. It would not be right for us to marry when you do not approve of it. Thus, I’ve decided that I want to forgo the marriage.”

 

Yongsun makes sure to squeeze her hands tight together and purse her lips and stare resolutely at the table as she speaks. She hates making herself look so mousy and weak, but it’s better to put on a convincing act than none at all.

 

Mrs Kang is ecstatic, though she’s trying to hide it. Yongsun has enough experience with studying her own mother’s facial expressions in the past to be able to identify it. “And you’ve come to tell me specially because?”

 

“It wouldn’t be a good idea for me to tell Jaehyuk. He’d never agree. So I’m coming to you to tell you and to ask you for help, Mrs Kang. You have the power to cancel the wedding without question, and the power to tell Jaehyuk and he would have to accept it because you’re his mother.”

 

“I find it a little suspicious that you’re suddenly willing to give him up, Miss Solar. Are you sure you don’t have an ulterior motive?” Mrs Kang asks suddenly, seemingly ignoring Yongsun’s reply to her question. Yongsun looks up and stares at her straight in the eye.

 

“I’m willing to do it because I don’t think I should be marrying someone as perfect as he, mentall

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fluffsaur
Oh my God, this reached 300 upvotes. Once again, huge thank you all readers of this story, I didn't think it would make it this far lol. Thank you for all the wonderful comments too, I don't have the time to reply to every one but know that I read them all! <3

Comments

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railtracer08
400 streak #1
Chapter 24: Wow.... When i started reading i couldn't begin to imagine where we would end up, and the hows and whys. Just, great job.
ravenclaw_ #2
Chapter 24: I spend two days to finish this, I think this fic is going to be my favourite. Thanks author-nim
goldrushbyul
#3
Chapter 24: went to bed at 2am reading this, you my friend are a MENACE, but fr I ooved this soooo much
AuroraBorealist
#4
Chapter 24: I found this fic in 2023—my bad. Red this in one go and what a hell ride this was. In a positive way! I enjoyed every conflict, every word in this story, and eventho I hope you could get some closures to several things, regardless—this story is well-written and deserves an upvote. Thanks for writing, author!
EnterShift1122
#5
Chapter 24: Holy that's one hell of a ride
sadandlonely #6
Chapter 20: Y es es por eso que los psicólogos tienen a sus propios psicólogos, los psicólogos superiores jaja
sadandlonely #7
Chapter 5: Por qué es tan raroo
sadandlonely #8
Chapter 4: Es por qué ella no le agrado al comienzo? I need answers porque hasta donde se J&H es alegoría queer pero aja, i need answers plssss
sadandlonely #9
Chapter 1: Pero que ha pasado👁️👄👁️
sSNiZzy0418 #10
Chapter 3: Im a baby moo and love moonsun. This fic came highly recommended. I was planning to comment after reading all the chapters but I just really have to say CH 3 ending part gave me goosebumps. I have read tons of fanfic and have experience different emotion but never like this. I guess I'm used to fluff or angst but never this suspense. This is really well written. I'll continue reading now, sorry for rambling lol