Daesung almost lost his signature smile.

Alive era was more like an extended treatment to get it back. Sometimes, he would stay alone in a corner and cry in silence hoping that no one would see him.

Once, Seungri caught him and was courteous enough to walk away. But after the show, he hugged him without words. The simple gesture made Daesung glad to have someone like him around.

Even if he found his way back, Daesung still suffered from the guilty conscious that will never leave him alone. He just has to cope along and hope that someday he will be able to smile from the bottom of his heart.

Each time he forced himself to smile, Daesung felt sorry for his family, his team members, the staff and the audience that always cheered him on.

It was because of them that he could find a reason to live.

The multiple concerts they had helped him change the air and get away from the hate in his own country. Whenever he's home, he would just stay in bed all day doing anything and nothing.

He loved staying home.

Sometimes Seungri would want to drag him out but Daesung had zero interest in the maknae's wild party life. He actually scolded him about it few times. Not as much as the other hyungs but he told him to be careful and that the media would stop at nothing to bring him down.

Time passed and Daesung found the will to work on his solo album in Japan. It was his chance to prove his worthiness again and let people hear his type of music.

All the members supported him. Even without words, Daesung knew they would be there for him whether spiritually or emotionally.

The only one who was physically present was Seungri. He resided in Japan too, promoting BigBang through all types of variety and talk shows. BigBang was all over Japanese TV because of him. His Japanese skyrocketed that even Daesung can't understand him anymore.

Daesung remembers that one time around their debut in Japan when Jiyong hyung scolded Seungri and told him not to speak Japanese if he didn't know how. Ever since then Seungri worked on the language like crazy until all the group depended on him when they were in Japan. Daesung even heard people wonder if Seungri was actually BigBang's leader.

If there's something Daesung learnt about Seungri then it must be his persistent will. He never lets anyone tell him that he can't do something. He always, without doubt, proves them wrong.

It pains him when people can't understand Seungri for who he is. Or how much hardworking he can actually be. Daesung always thought that Seungri's bright loud personality was too much for people in their country. They won't accept him even if he became a saint.

But for him, Seungri was that light that always made him feel better. Daesung found hard time to adapt to Seungri's personality at first but then, he literally became an indispensable person and an important existence.

They didn't live together when they were both working on their solo activities in Japan but they often met for a meal or just some random chat. Seungri formed connections in no time even in Japan. He already had many restaurant recommendations and friends to hang out wi