[Pink] - 001
Carnation
Seulgi unconsciously took a step to the front where she could get a better view of the window that lead to the corridor. Finally she could see him, even if it was just a tiny bit, it was enough.
He was there, like always. Trying to reach perfection when he was already so close to it. He was magnificent. Putting emotions in every bit of each move. They were twelve in the room but he was the only one she could see. Seulgi's eyes naturally drifted from one part to another, focusing on the sweat rolling down his forehead to the way his mouth was becoming a slight smirk when he was satisfied with his progress. She also noticed how his powerful muscles led him to the centre of the group and his newly silver hair that helped him get into his character of a crazy doctor.
Seulgi could guess that he spent many hours thinking of which expression to make to show that Kai took control of his body and Jongin was left off-stage with a simple glance. Seulgi used to think that Jongin went over the top, that he was just exaggerating his moves and that his charisma was cringe-worthy, but then she realized that it wasn't Jongin being extra, it was just someone else. Kai was someone else. He was the one who appeared on stage and was the professional performer that all those celebrities complimented on TV. She despised him from the bottom of her heart but she was also mesmerized by his stage presence and talent. Kai was mysterious. Enchanting. Out of this world.
Jongin had caught Seulgi's attention from the first day she saw him in line with the rest of the trainees of 2007. She couldn't say that he stood out from the rest but he had that kind of aura around him. It was like his body was saying something even when he was simply breathing. It had always fascinated her, even today. That was mostly what made him popular among the other trainees. Everyone was at his feet. Seulgi couldn't even count how many friends he had the first week their training started.
He was a magnet.
His smile could make flowers grow and his smirk, girls fall. Guys admired him because he was capable of everything they couldn't. Seulgi was both since she admired him at first and fell for him a few years later. That admiration somehow turned into love without her noticing and the moment she did, Seulgi knew it was over.
"We also need to practice Seulgi," Joohyun reminded Seulgi with a warm smile before patting her back.
"I'm sorry, I was just lost in my thoughts," Seulgi said a bit embarrassed by her own attitude.
"It's okay, I know how hard it must be."
You don't know.
Her heart answered almost automatically. Those words that always stayed in the back of her mind and that always came back at the slightest opportunity only reminded Seulgi that she still hadn't moved on. She figured it was its way of telling her that she made the wrong choice once again. Slowly, she was getting used to it now, it's been two years.
Seulgi and her co-members that were soon to debut in SM's newest girlgroup went inside the practice room next to EXO's and started dancing to Happiness again. Seulgi couldn't say that it was her favorite song but it indeed made her think of something else. Always having gloomy thoughts and thinking of the past did her no good. Always thinking of him was the worse.
The fact that she was seeing him everywhere didn't help much. He was on every screen in the company, also known as her second home. He was on every bus passing beside her when she walked back home. He was the center of every poster posted everywhere. He was even on her brother's mug. Seulgi's brother bought it in 2013 when Exo had came back with Growl thinking he was supporting his sister's bestfriend in his activities. He showed it to her with a proud smile. Unfortunately, he didn't get the results he wanted as Seulgi cried every last drop of tears her body had left that day. But it helped: she doesn't cry anymore, she doesn't think she can anyways. Her body won't allow it. Even when Seulgi wants to cry when she thinks of their shared memories, the tears won't come out.
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