Kyungsoo had a basket of fruits as he waited at the lobby. When he saw Kai waving a hand, he briskly walked towards him. They held hands as they rode the elevator.

“Good morning, auntie,” Kyungsoo greeted Kai’s mother even though she was asleep. Kai put the basket on the corner and he let Kyungsoo sit at the sofa on the side.

“How is she?” Kyungsoo inquired and Kai answered with a smile, “well, she still had cancer. A fifty-fifty chance. But things are doing fine as of the moment.”

Kyungsoo nodded, having another question, “How about you? How are you?”

“I’m fine too,” said him. “I’m always tired, but I’m glad I have you.”

Kyungsoo smiled, walked towards Kai and gave him a hug. “I’m glad to have you too.”

Kyungsoo stayed overnight at the hospital together with Kai. He assisted Kai’s mother whenever she would go to the restroom; he gave her water if she needed to drink. While Kai was asleep, Kyungsoo and his mother had some conversation.

“Thank you for staying here,” she feebly smiled.

“It’s nothing, auntie.”

“And thank you for being with Kai.”

Kyungsoo blushed a little as he glanced at his teammate. “He’s fun to be with.”

Kai’s mother beamed with his answer. She also took a glance at his son, “Do you love him?”

Kyungsoo’s brows raised. His fingers fidgeted behind his seat as he stammered, “uh…uhm…”

In the end, Kyungsoo nodded.

“Well,” she interrupted the short silence between them, “Kai loves you too.”

Kyungsoo blushed even more and he couldn’t utter word because his heart was beating fast.

“Kai told me he loves the way you look, and the way you work really fast, and the way you cared for him during your practicum.”

“Kyungsoo,” she added, “is it okay if we leave for a while?”

Kyungsoo nodded again and he held her hand to say, “I understand. When you go back here, just make sure you’ll be all well.”

Kyungsoo understood the situation. However, deep inside, he was feeling heavy, for Kai would be away from him. Nevertheless, he kept on thinking it would just be for a time being. After the successful treatment of his mother, Kai would go back to him.

Kai’s mother fell asleep while Kyungsoo remained up, looking at the window and gazing at the stars. He clenched his fists as he felt pain on his upper back and when he coughed, there was blood again. Kyungsoo rushed outside to wash on the sink, and as usual he rinsed his mouth to remove the blood.

Kyungsoo gripped so tight on the sink, and he was trembling with the pain, for he felt being stabbed on every part of his chest and he was struggling not to cry with it. He knelt on the tiles and silently hissed; he was sweating a lot and he was catching his breath, until he couldn’t take it anymore that he fell unconscious inside the comfort room.

Kai asked almost every nurse the next morning if they had seen a short, huge-eyed male. He tried to call him, only discovering that Kyungsoo left his phone in the room. Kai walked along the corridors in search for him until someone poked him on the shoulder.

“Kyungsoo! Where have you been?” Kai exclaimed and he hugged him tight. “Where have you been, huh?” he whispered.

Kyungsoo grinned, “You want to hear something crazy?”

Kai beamed back at him, “Sure, what?”

“I fell asleep at the toilet,” he deadpanned.

The taller male chuckled, “so, that’s where you’ve been?”

“Uh huh,” he affirmed, and Kai playfully unwrap his arms on him.

“Eeew,” Kai remarked and he ran back to his mother’s room, repeatedly peeking at Kyungsoo behind, making sure that his boyfriend would chase him.

--

Kai, I’m sorry. I won’t be able to go to the hospital anymore. I have lots of school works, and I’m also busy helping my parents with the business. I’ll make sure I’ll drop by someday. I’m really sorry. I love you.

Kyungsoo didn’t tell any lie when he messaged that to Kai. Kai understood, replying with a simple, ‘Okay Kyung, good luck and I love you too,’ because he himself couldn’t even catch up with their course requirements because he needed to take care of his mother first, and he understood how hard and demanding it is to be the next CEO of a huge company.

Kai kept on messaging Kyungsoo online every day, and almost every hour, for he missed him so much but they could only meet at the university during classes. There were even times when Kai was already missing classes, and there were also times when he attended but Kyungsoo was the one absent. Kai thought Kyungsoo was really so busy that he couldn’t even go to class anymore, and so he simply chatted with his boyfriend to have updates of him.

How are you, kyung?? <3

You were absent today, I think helping with the business is so tiring??

I miss you, Kyung. I hope we’ll see each other soon. I love you!

Kai observed that Kyungsoo hadn’t been online for weeks now, and so his messages were left unread. Even when he texted him, Kyungsoo was not replying, and when he called him, it was either out of coverage area or the subscriber couldn’t be reached. One time, Kyungsoo was able to answer the call, and Kai was so happy being able to hear from his boyfriend again.

“Kyung! What happened? I miss you so much already…”

Kyungsoo answered with a high-toned voice, feigning happiness behind the phone, “I miss you too, Kai…so bad.”

“You’ve been frequently absent these days, and I observed you were also not going online. Is there something wrong, Kyung?”

“Nah,” was his quick reply, “I’m here at home. I’m just so busy doing school works and helping with the business at the same time.”

“Oh,” Kai remarked, “so that’s the reason. Kyung, don’t get too tired okay? Make sure you’ll rest and good luck with all your works! I love you!” he screamed at the phone.

Kyungsoo giggled and he felt chest pain again, and his throat tensed up, him spitting blood on their tiles. As the metallic liquid stained his teeth, he whispered, “I love you too, Kai,” and he put his phone down.

Kyungsoo went back in front of his laptop, proceeded writing his school paper while every bit of him was being stabbed. He coughed again, now staining the screen of his computer, and so he simply wiped it a cloth. He focused on his writing yet remembered that his father also ordered him to do a presentation for the company advertisement, so he concentrated even further to finish all the things he needed to accomplish.

However, he wasn’t able to write another word with his writing again. As he stared at the screen, he dropped tears as the doctor’s voice kept replaying in his head, “You have stage 3b lung cancer.”

Kyungsoo didn’t even mind how his parents took it as nothing and simply kept themselves busy running the company. He also didn’t mind it being one of their company’s top secret because once the competitors knew that the heir was sick, it would be a downturn for the business. Kyungsoo understood them. He understood how business runs and why it must be kept a secret. What hurt him so much was just, at this time, he could lean to no one, not even to Kai, because Kai was having enough burdens and he wouldn’t dare add to them. His parents also told him not to tell anyone to prevent information leaks.

So he was here inside his huge room in the mansion, sobbing and dealing with every deep cut and pierce his cancer was giving him...all alone. 

His parents told him that for every problem, there is a solution. And to his cancer problem, the solution is to take medications and carefully go to the hospital to have chemotherapy. Simple as that. But to Kyungsoo, it was not that simple. He needed them beside him, to hug him every night as he dealt with the pain, to caress him and remind him that he could go through all these, that there was hope and he could conquer everything.

However, Kyungsoo got none of those. There was not even a night or even a minute within a day when his parents showed that they love him.

It was as if he had no family. It was as if he was just living alone in this huge mansion.

It was only Kai who showed him that he had family. It was only Kai who let him feel really loved.

And so those simple I love you, I miss you, and good lucks of Kai were the things Kyungsoo was holding upon in this tough time.

Kyungsoo would faithfully take all his medications. He would do all the treatments their family doctor required him. He would let his ing cancer get lost, so that he could live for a very long time and be with Kai until they get old.

Kyungsoo would do everything to show himself to Kai in the best form he could be, because he wanted Kai to be the happiest man ever, and because he loved Kai so much.

--

Sehun asked Kai to have a break even just for a short time. As Kai was doing his paper, Sehun suddenly flipped down his laptop.

“Stop that,” Sehun gently said, “I’ll write it for you. So just sleep, please?”

Without a word, Kai shook his head and simply opened his computer again.

Sehun grabbed his laptop from him. “You’re tired. Sleep, so you’ll have energy for your mother, and for Kyungsoo.”

His best friend stared at him. When he heard Kyungsoo’s name, he lied down on the couch, and rested as Sehun said. “Thank you, Sehun.”

Sehun smiled and spread the blanket for Kai. It was a sad smile, because he needed to say Kyungsoo’s name before he could persuade his best friend.

He watched Kai as he slept, and he hoped that Kyungsoo would always be absent at school and would not visit here anymore. Sehun unconsciously glided his palm on Kai’s hair and whispered, “I’ll soon have you.”

Kyungsoo was the name who welcomed Sehun to his new morning. “I miss Kyungsoo so much, Hun. What should I do?”

He just displayed his stoic face. “Text him again?” he answered tonelessly.

“Yeah yeah I should. I hope I won’t bother him.”

Good morning Kyung! I miss you. I love you!

Sehun turned around, eyes welling up, because Kai didn’t even greet him a good morning.

--

Kyungsoo took all his medications. He never missed one, and he was faithfully going to the hospital, being so careful as he went to its chemotherapy section.

He was taking pain killers so he could be relieved for some hours. And when the pain would strike again, he would just have another intake so he could do his responsibilities at school and business.

Kyungsoo also needed the pain killer to be able to cook for Kai and his mother. Every morning, he had gone to their kitchen, cooked Kai’s favorite chicken curry and he would ask one of their maids to deliver it to the hospital.

Every time the delivery was sent to Kai, Kai would quickly open a small piece of paper inside, having a short message. He couldn’t help but smile.

Hi Kai! I miss you so much. I hope you eat all your curry!! <3

I’m really sorry I think I couldn’t even go there. I’m too busy… :(

Kai! Can I ask you not to call me anymore? Oftentimes when you call I’m so busy…:(((

Just text me and I’ll read them all at night, okay?????

And for every short message, there would always be a P.S. which would remove all the fatigue and complete Kai’s day,

I love you, Kai.

At night, Kyungsoo would read Kai’s text messages which would also complete his day, because for every message, an ‘I love you’ would always be embedded.

Thanks for the curry Kyung!!! Mmmm really delicious!

I miss you so so so muuuuch Kyuuuuung L((((

Just surprise us here when you come ehhh?

*hugs and kisses* I really miss you.

Reading all those, Kyungsoo jumped from his bed and swiftly took his medicine for the night. He drank them with a smile, followed by a cough which stained his teeth in red once again.

Kyungsoo didn’t mind that; he would get well and appear in front of Kai again soon.

Because as of the moment, Kyungsoo was losing weight, and it was too obvious he wouldn’t want to show himself to Kai. His knuckles were getting gaunter, his clavicles were getting more visible and he lost much flesh on his arms and he was always feeling feeble.

Besides, Kyungsoo’s voice was getting hoarser. He attempted singing his favorite songs yet he couldn’t anymore, and every time he spoke to his maids, it would be a struggle because the syllables were getting less articulate. He also requested Kai not to call anymore, because his boyfriend might know he was sick somewhere.

--

A month passed by; Kyungsoo didn’t drop by the hospital and Kai was puzzled why Kyungsoo couldn’t pick his call up even at night or just at least once a week.

Kai wanted to hear Kyungsoo’s voice and he wanted to see him so bad. Even if his mother needed help at the time, he went to Kyungsoo’s mansion just to see the one he loved.

Kai did go to the mansion thrice a week at night, yet for every time he went there, the maid would tell him either that Kyungsoo was busy at his parents’ office or he was already asleep for being too tired.

Yet all the time, Kyungsoo was just in his room, peeking slightly at the window to have a glance of the person he loved the most, and he went back to his bed wrapped in a blanket. He was having fever, and as usual, tensed air would be forced out from his chest, accompanied with more blood.

Kyungsoo was not feeling any better. He thought he could die from the heavy of the pounds in his chest. And now, he could hardly climb up their stairs.

Kyungsoo followed everything that the doctor told him. Kyungsoo did everything to get better.

Perhaps that everything was not enough.

Kai always asked Kyungsoo through text if something was wrong, if he was sick somewhere or he was dealing with a problem.

Of all those questions, Kyungsoo assured Kai that he was all well and he was just oftentimes so tired, he only wanted to rest.

Yet Kai had been persistent asking him, because Kai was already feeling something that wasn’t right. Kyungsoo should have at least attended his classes even just once a month; Kyungsoo should have at least appeared before him once whenever he stood in front of their gate. And for a week now, Kyungsoo stopped sending him dishes and short messages.

Kai stood in front of their gate once again, and this time, even though the maid kept on repeating that Kyungsoo was sleeping, Kai screamed to wake Kyungsoo up.

“Kyungsoo! Kyungsoo! I’m here! Just show up at your window, please? Kyungsoo!”

Kyungsoo heard each syllable. He sat on his bed, ready to glance at the window, yet tears dropped from his eyes as he remembered what the doctor told him,

You have stage 4 lung cancer now. In your case, the longest you could live is two years.

Having that in mind, Kyungsoo took a glance at the window, only showing his face while he covered his body with the curtain. He covered his arms as he waved to Kai, and he showed his grin to make Kai feel better.

Kai meanwhile waved so wide at the gate, and he even jumped like crazy seeing Kyungsoo peek at the window. He sent flying kisses and Kyungsoo signaled him he caught them, and the petite male put those kisses on his lips. Afterwards, he also sent many kisses to his boyfriend.

Kyungsoo went away from the window and he vomited the dinner he ate. He didn’t go back to the window again.

Kai, on the other hand, waited for Kyungsoo to show up at least for a second again, but he saw the lights turned off, so he just went back to the hospital with a smile on his face.

Sehun froze when Kai, for an unknown reason, hugged him so tight. He couldn’t move, and there came too many butterflies in his heart.

“Sehun, guess what? I saw Kyungsoo! And we even exchanged flying kisses!” Kai was all red.

Seeing his best friend that happy, he just smiled. But he clenched his fists, and his teeth grinded.

All of a sudden, a tear fell from Sehun’s eyes.

Kai’s lips parted. “Se…Sehun,” the beam in his lips gradually went away, as he saw his best friend’s face turn into a cascade. “What happened?”

Sehun snickered with the question, his eyes turning red when he asked, “What do you think happened?”

There came a puzzle displayed in Kai, and he shook his head, uttering, “I don’t know. Wh…what happened, Sehun?”

Sehun ran his palms on his cheeks, peering upwards to stop his tears from flowing. He wasn’t able to control it anymore, and to his own surprise, he yelled at his best friend’s face, “What do you think happened to my heart? What do you think happens to me every ing time you will spit out Kyungsoo’s name? What do you think happens to me every time you will tell me how much you love Kyungsoo?!”

Kai was left speechless.

“I die, Kai. My heart shatters to pieces. Do you know why? It’s because I love you. I ing love you.”

Right at that moment, Kai made things clear to Sehun. “I’m sorry,” and he offered his handkerchief to his best friend, “but I really love Kyungsoo.”

For the following days, Sehun did not visit him at the hospital.

--

Two weeks passed. Kyungsoo wasn’t really going to school anymore; he couldn’t do the works his parents were giving him anymore, and he was just lying on his bed as the maids took care of his blood on the floor. He could hardly grab his phone on the bedside table to read Kai’s messages, and so he just let his maid noona read them for him.

Kyung! It’s only two weeks before we will go to America. Let’s have dinner at least once, eh?

Kyuuuuung! I miss you toooo baaaad!!!

When can we meet?

I love you so much, Kyung!

He heard all the messages Kai sent to him, and of all those, he only had one reply. Sorry, Kai. We can’t meet. Have a safe trip. I love you.

Upon receiving the reply, Kai rushed to the mansion, shouting Kyungsoo’s name again and again.

But at this time, Kyungsoo neither peeked at the window nor went down to the gate, because Kyungsoo could hardly even sit without the maid assisting him.

Kai asked the guard if he could just visit Kyungsoo in his room, but it could not be. So Kai yelled again to catch Kyungsoo’s attention.

Kyungsoo wept as he listened to the voice of the man he wanted to see so bad. He wanted Kai’s arms to wrap him again, he wanted him to wipe a towel against his skin, and he wanted him to brush his hair as he prepared to fall asleep. Kyungsoo wanted to embrace Kai, and he wanted to feel his warmth.

But he couldn’t have those.

Thirteen days left. Kai left Kyungsoo with the message, Don’t you love me anymore, Kyung?

Kai shed tears as he went in front of the mansion again, attempting to enter and see Kyungsoo just for a little while. He yelled like the past days, but he ended up going back to the hospital with nothing.

Again, Kai texted Kyungsoo and he cried, Kyung, don’t you love me anymore?

Twelve days left. Kai didn’t receive any reply. Kyungsoo was too weak to even listen to his messages, and just last night, he was transferred to the hospital because home service wasn’t sufficient to deal with his condition anymore. He was diagnosed with pneumonia again; he could hardly eat, could hardly talk.

Kyungsoo’s parents got his phone, turned it off and threw his sim card to prevent their son from informing his friends about his situation. Kai was sending Kyungsoo lots of messages and was calling him again and again, yet all those went useless.

Kai stood in front of Kyungsoo’s gate again, yelled and yelled until his throat hurt, and he ran into the house only to get beaten by the security. They kept on telling Kyungsoo was not inside, but he didn’t want to believe that and pursued struggling to get inside.

He was only thrown outside, and so he just stood in front for hours with lips and nose bleeding, until midnight came and the rain poured, and he just sat on a post to sleep, only to wake up the next morning without seeing Kyungsoo.

Kai sent another message to him, I think you don’t love me anymore. I still love you nevertheless, Kyung.

Eleven days left. There was no name on Kyungsoo’s room, and his hospital record was disguised under another name. Kyungsoo felt like he was going to die, he felt each of his muscle giving up and his lungs taking away all the air from him. But no, he would fight and take all his medicines. He would still need to gain weight and bring back his healthy image so he could appear in front of Kai, grinning and jumping in joy. He still had two years, two years to strive to let this ing cancer die.

Kyungsoo did his best to dictate to his maid noona Kai’s phone number, and after that, he dictated his message, despite his voice being so hoarse, I love you so much, Kai.

When Kai received it, he dropped a tear, because he thought that Kyungsoo could not show his words in action. He was beginning to doubt, because Kyungsoo was not texting him often than he did before, he was not showing up even just at their window, and he didn’t even have a second to spend a moment with him. He doubted because Kyungsoo was being too busy that he was forgetting him. Kai replied to the unknown number anyway, knowing that it could only come from Kyungsoo, I love you too.

The maid noona told Kyungsoo the reply, and Kyungsoo smiled behind his transparent mask, being more determined to get well, and maybe to just go to the airport before Kai would leave.

But Kai suddenly remembered one more person who would say that—Sehun.

Ten days left. Kai kept on texting the unknown phone number, sending hundred times repeated questions, Are you really Kyungsoo? If yes, where are you? I can just go there if you want. I just want to see you, Kyung.

And he sent multiple texts again with the line, I love you, Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo begged his maid noona to tell Kai his whereabouts, and to ask him if he could come here. But then she reminded him that his parents didn’t want to tell anyone and she would get fired from her job. With that, Kyungsoo also remembered how heavy Kai’s burdens already were, that Kai was already so tired taking care of his mom while still dealing with lots of school requirements, and he was also fixing his leave of absence at school and their papers for America. Kyungsoo nodded to his maid noona, understanding the situation and agreeing that he should not tell Kai.

Kyungsoo just missed Kai so much. He just wanted to at least see him and kiss him once again.

Kai didn’t receive any reply. And so he just burst out his frustrations to Sehun who, after what happened, came back to see him. Sehun needed to see him, because he loved him, and he would go with them to the U.S. because his family had long planned to leave at this time too.

“Don’t go to Kyungsoo anymore. You’ll just waste your time.”

“I’ll go there until Kyungsoo shows up,” was Kai’s firm reply.

Kai was about to open the door when Sehun gently grabbed his wrist, “Kai, don’t. If Kyungsoo wants to meet with you, he’ll text you. So just stay here, look after your mom because she needs you too, and wait until Kyungsoo texts you.”

“Just please,” Sehun added, “don’t make yourself get beaten again.”

Kai, in the end, listened to Sehun.

And so nine, eight, seven, six days left, Kai felt like dying waiting for Kyungsoo’s message.

Kyungsoo, meanwhile, was struggling to dictate his message to his maid noona, I love you Kai, I miss you Kai, but all those were for nothing, because his parents discovered it and ordered his noona never to follow what Kyungsoo would say anymore.

Sehun, on the other hand, did not leave Kai in the hospital. He let Kai’s head rest on him every time he would cry because of Kyungsoo. He comforted his best friend every day, telling that Kyungsoo would text or call anytime, and that they would meet before they would go to U.S.

Kai felt the comfort in him. Sehun could lift his spirit up with his trying-hard and lame jokes.

Sehun could make Kai smile at this difficult time.

Five, four, three days left. Sehun helped Kai packing up their luggage. Sehun even saw Kai’s photo album full of his photos together with Kyungsoo, and Sehun felt some needles pricking his heart because Kai never loved him the way he loved Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo meanwhile was having his spirit getting lifted up, because at this time he could already sit without the help of his noona, and he could feel that after just some days, he would be well again. The thing was, however, he could only get well from his pneumonia, and not from his cancer.

Kyungsoo at this early point told his noona that they would go to the airport to see Kai before he leaves. He promised he would not get off the car and just glance in a distance, watching Kai leave with a smile. And to his surprise, his noona allowed him to do so, telling him that it should just be really fast or she could get fired.

Two days, one day left. Kai felt hopeless as he stared at his phone, so he just smiled at Sehun, thanking him for being by his side.

Kyungsoo was so excited for the next day because he would be able to see Kai once again. He wasn’t even able to sleep at night imagining how things could be for the next day.

Today was the day Kyungsoo had been waiting for. Kyungsoo and his noona escaped from the room and their driver drove to the airport.

As he stepped his foot at the airport, Kai sent Kyungsoo a text to the number thrown by Kyungsoo’s parents, We’re leaving now, Kyung. I love you. See you soon.

Early in the morning, Kyungsoo’s car was in hazard near the gate, waiting for Kai to appear.

It took almost an hour before Kyungsoo saw Kai walking towards the gate, together with his mother and Sehun. Kyungsoo’s eyes went wide, and he didn’t know why there came a heavy pound in him when he saw Sehun beside Kai.

Nevertheless, he ignored after a while, because at this moment, his mind and soul were all focused at Kai. He missed him so much, and he wanted to run right at this moment. Yet, he just sat in the car and took a glance at the window, displaying his wide smile as he watched him move towards the entrance.

A fourth of an hour passed; although Kai already entered, Kyungsoo stayed outside, hoping that Kai might show up once again.

Kyungsoo was not mistaken. He saw Kai running outside. Kai looked so troubled, looking left and right, turning around again and again as if he was searching for something…someone.

Kyungsoo then realized that maybe, Kai was looking for him.

Kai knelt on the ground, and sobbed.

Kyungsoo almost opened the door when his noona grabbed his wrist reminding him of his promise. And so he closed his eyes, pulling the door back, controlling the tears welling up in him.

In a distance, Kyungsoo saw how Sehun embraced him, and how Kai hugged him back as he wept.

Kyungsoo could only watch them.

Sehun and Kai went back inside, leaving Kyungsoo inside the car whispering, “I love you, Kai.”