I’ve never really slept in the same bed as Philip on a calm night, in the hotel we were busy trying to figure this marriage thing out and last he was super drunk. I feel a little nervous now, I’ve never slept in the same bed as a man before we got married. I can’t even imagine how this will play out.

  Once I came out of the bathroom from my shower I saw Philip sitting on our bed, shirtless, sounded by a bunch of rose petals. He smiled and the speaker on the nightstand. I stood in the doorway and watched him mouth the words to ‘Dilemma.’ I couldn’t help laughing and trying to hide my face.

  He got off the bed and walked towards me, “Come over here.” he said in a low tone. He pulled me into his arms and I put my hands on his shoulders. I felt like my the muscles in my face would stop working from all the smiling I was doing right now. “There’s the smile I’ve been waiting for.”

  “You don’t think I’ve been smiling?” I asked.

  “Not really...you don’t seem to happy with me most of the time.” he said sheepishly.

  It wasn’t him that I wasn’t happy with, it was this new lifestyle. I’m not used to the world watching me through a camera lens. Being on Shannon Bright’s show today made me realise just how different my life was now.

***

  When I walked out on to the stage with Philip the crowd cheered. I flashed a fake smile at the studio audience and gave the same smile to Shannon Bright when I had to give her a hug. She sat down in her chair and Philip and I sat on the loveseat next to her. Philip had an arm wrapped around me and I kept a hand on his thigh, as uncomfortable as that was for me. Kevin said we needed to look like I couple so I had to act the part even though Philip had no problem with doing this.

  I’ve seen a lot of episodes of Shannon’s show, it mainly consisted of her getting the inside scoop on celebrities, she even had a segment dedicated to Philip called ‘Shannon’s Chaek on Baek.’ I wonder if she would try to date Philip if she were 20 years younger, she’s nuts about this man. I never saw the appeal of a vain man who liked bragging about his money but I see all the appeal of the Philip who loved me enough to shield me for paparazzi when we went out together.

  Shannon clapped and said, “You two are so cute! I don’t really see ambw celebrity couples.”

  Me and my husband exchanged looks before saying in unison, “What?”

  Shannon laughed and tossed a blond curl off her shoulder, “You know, Asian man, black woman couple? Well, some people also call it bwam.”

  I laughed and nodded. I felt a little tense, I didn’t want to be blindsided by any of her questions on national television.

  “I think I speak for the world when I say that I was shocked when I found out you were married.” Shannon said.

  “Well, I wanted to protect her from the harsh eyes of the public ‘cause I knew she’d feel uncomfortable.” Philip explained.

  “So, Ayana, what made you decide to change your mind and marry Philip?” Shannon asked.

  Here it is, my moment to say something. “Honestly, after being with Philip for so long it felt like part of me was missing when I wasn’t with him...I just told him that all the paparazzi and stuff like that don’t matter to me.” I said.

  Philip grinned and rubbed my arm before turning back to Shannon who was tearing up. “Goodness...how sweet. That’s real love.” she said with a smile.

  Real love. I keep wondering when I’ll love Philip, I feel like I’m leaving him hanging like this. I know how he feels but my feelings are...less than love but more than liking him. I just don’t think I know him well enough yet. It almost that time will make me love him back but if that’s what it takes then I just have to wait.

  “The whole world wants to know, who exactly is Ayana Baek?” Shannon asked.

  “Well, I’m twenty-one, I used to work at a lawfirm, and I’m married to Philip Baek. I think that’s all the world should know about me. My husband’s brilliant products should take more precedence over my identity.” Kevin told me that I should definitely not share too much with Shannon. People will google me and try to figure me out so there’s no point in oversharing.

  This wasn’t the answer she wanted though. Shannon like in-depth answers so she can have more to talk about, without this there’s no appeal to 45 year old and her talk show. She gave me a painfully fake smile and turned her attention to Philip.

  “So will there be a honeymoon?” Shannon asked.

  “No, I’m actually going to be really busy with production before the holiday season.” This was a lie, we’ve talked about going to Hawaii some time next week this morning. This just goes along with the idea of not sharing too much information with Shannon.

  Shannon didn’t like his answer either. “Hmm, well thank you for coming on the show. I really appreciate it.” So she chose to cut the interview short. That’s a pretty childish route.

  The two of us proceeded to hug her and walk off stage after the interview. We met up with Kevin backstage and he hug the two of us. “Good job you two.” he whispered.

  When we separated Philip wrapped an arm around Kevin’s shoulder. “I say the three of us should go get lunch after we leave.”

  “Sure, I’ll pay for it this time.” Kevin insisted with a smile.

  Kevin and Philip would’ve been identical if Philip hadn’t dyed his hair red. Either way, it’s funny to see how different two twin brothers can be. Philip was the vain and upbeat one while Kevin was the selfless and chill one. Even though I’ve seen them argue a couple time now, their love for each other was evident.

  The show was going on commercial break so Shannon came backstage too. Once she saw us and frowned and marched toward the three of us. “What was up with those answers to my questions?!” she nearly shouted.

  I looked up at Philip who replied, “Now that I’m married, I’m revoking this role of being a public figure that people gave me. My company and my wife and what matter to me.”

  She laughed and said, “It seems I’ve figured out who wears the pants in the relationship.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean, Shannon?” Philip asked flatly.

  “It means that little missy here is controlling you. You’d never say something like that before. What’s happened to you?” Shannon asked snarkily.

  “If you keep talking about my wife like that I will buy the network just to have your show canceled and release a statement about how you falsified information about several different celebrities when you were still trying to get views. Verbally attack my wife again and I promise, I will ruin this show for you.” Philip said through gritted teeth.