Since the day he fainted, two weeks and a half ago, Minseok tended to sleep more, so it wasn’t a surprise when Baekhyun, then Tao, left his and Minseok’s room before him the morning after his injury. In fact, Minseok had been one of the last to slip out of his bed, only followed by Luhan and Jongin, the heaviest sleepers of them all. Or at least, Jongin was. Luhan had caught that virus that had started with Minseok and was decided to do each and every members of their band. Plus their managers.

If Minseok had asked Baekhyun not to mention his little injury the day before, it was to keep his friends from worrying. However the event – and the slight limp on Minseok’s part – didn’t go unnoticed by a few. Jongdae asked the elder a few time if he was okay, and Minseok brushed him off, it’s nothing, you worry too much. And, let’s be honest here, Jongdae tended to worry a bit too much when it came to Minseok. So he didn’t push it. However, Jongin hadn’t been that easy to brush off. Rather, Minseok couldn’t brush him off. A few members were already on their way to the practice room – minus Luhan who had just fallen back to sleep once he’d eaten a bit - but since Jongin and him had woken up late, they had let the other members leave first.

When he left the bathroom, Jongin, who was putting on a coat, raised an eyebrow at the way he walked. The oldest didn’t notice the questioning look Jongin gave him, only continuing his way to his room, dumping his dirty clothes on the laundry basket. When he came back, a scarf around his neck, Jongin could not keep quiet , worried.

« Hyung, did you hurt your ankle ? »

Minseok glanced up, startled. It took him a few seconds to answer, not knowing if he should tell the truth or not. He decided against it.

« Mh, no, why are you asking me Jongin-ah ? »

Minseok himself wouldn’t have believed this answer. He mentally punched his face.

« You’re walking funny. »

Because of the fact that Jongin pointed out the most evident thing ever, Minseok thought himself stupid. Lying was no use, Jongin always knew. Not in the same way as Kyungsoo, who had silently lived the same trials, not like Chanyeol who easily sensed his discomfort, or like Yixing’s blatant truth. Jongin had a way to pick up when people lied. Not like it hadn’t been obvious right now. Minseok observed as Jongin got up from the couch, grabbing his left arm gently from where the elder was, up on his two feet and still between the living room and the member’s room corridor, forcing him to seat down on the same sofa Jongin had just gotten up from.

« Let me see. »

Without waiting for Minseok’s permission, the younger boy knelt in front of him, one knee up, and slid his hands down Minseok’s right leg, pushing the fabric of his pants up so he could take a good look at that ankle hurting his friend. Jongin’s face was impassive, not showing any emotion but the quiet, discrete worry. The area around Minseok’s right ankle was a bit swollen, red, but nothing too bad, it seemed. It needed its rest. To confirm his theory, Jongin lightly pressed his thumb where he thought Minseok would be in pain. Surprise by the light pressure, he gasped, letting out a small noise of disapproval as Jongin withdrew his hand, letting the leg of Minseok's sweatpants fall over the ankle. Minseok let out a small huff, biting his lower lip in wait of a reaction from Jongin, who had yet to lift his eyes toward the pink haired man. But Minseok knew Jongin, and Jongin was angry. So when the younger man stood up, crossing his arms in a disappointed way in front of his chest, Minseok braced himself.

“Why didn't you say anything, uh ?! If you had gone dancing, it would have gotten worse !”

The way he was saying it, someone could think he was really mad, scolding his older friend when it wasn't his place to do so. But the whine in his voice, the pout of his lips and the way his brows were furrowed, anyone could see Jongin was just frustrated, worried and tired of Minseok acting like nothing mattered as long as he was the only one hurt. It wasn't fair. The elder was always taking care of them, never asking for something in return. Minseok was always the one staying quiet, leaving the spotlight for the younger members. He was always passing everything concerning him as non important and irrelevant. And that was the problem. Jongin hated that about Minseok. He didn't know he was worth being worried about.

“Why can't you just take a ing break, hyung ?! It wouldn't hurt you, you're tired and those two last weeks were ty to you and I think, hell, we all think you should take a break !”

Jongin had raised his voice through his scolding, but upon seeing the smaller man drawing up his whole body in the back of the couch, arms crossed around his knees as he tried to avoid Jongin's eyes, the younger tried to calm himself, lowering his voice. Jongin felt a bit guilty, but at the same time, someone had to scream at a moment or another. He sighed, running a hand through his recently dyed locks. Jongin took a seat beside Minseok, whose eyes were a bit shiny. Okay, Jongin felt really bad. He had not intended to make his hyung cry.

The younger man took a minute to let the silence settle in, to let Minseok absorb what had just been said, before Jongin laid his head on his shoulder, which he managed only after he half laid on the sofa, since Minseok was way smaller.

“No, but really, hyung. You look even more tired than Yifan hyung and Junmyeon hyung combined, recently.” From his spot on Minseok's left shoulder, he glanced at the elder's face before adding in a small voice, “we really are worried...”

He felt Minseok take a big breath in.

“I…-” He closed his mouth, thinking about what to answer. Was there even something to answer ?

“I didn't think it was that bad ?” He placed his palm against his eyes, rubbing them. “It's just-”

Minseok let out another long huff of air. Talking was hard. It was hard to tell people how ty he felt, sometimes. Because not everyone had experienced it. It wasn't everyday. It wasn't sudden. It was a creeping feeling that just took him by the guts every time there was something bad about himself. It was the deep ache in his bones that couldn't get away. It was the fact that he couldn't get injured, not so closed to a comeback. He couldn't get sick, couldn't stay fat without being a weight for the other, without slowing the whole group down. His only way of doing so was by keeping silent and put up with it. Smile and be pretty. He knew the other members knew and tried whatever they could to help, he knew they loved him, and if he could he would only listen to them.

But it wasn't as simple. He couldn't change after one argument with Jongin, or after a comfortable meal with Kyungsoo. He couldn't just get better after a talk with Yixing or a day being taken care of by Yifan. It took time, efforts, and it was emotionally draining. And Minseok was tired. He was trying not to be a burden, but it seemed like he couldn't make the right balance yet. I ed up. Well. It wasn't new. But he had to keep moving forward. He had to get better. He wanted to get better.

“I'm sorry.”

Minseok's voice was almost a whisper, only escaping his lips in a breath, but enough to let Jongin hear it. Against his shoulder, he felt Jongin shake his head.

“It's okay, hyung, we know you're trying. I...” Jongin his lips, a pause in his sentence. “I was going to say that I shouldn't have snapped, but no, I needed to let it out.”

With uncertainty lacing with his voice, Jongin shyly glanced at Minseok once again, waiting for a reaction. Was it really the right thing to say ?

When Minseok nodded slowly, eyes glued to the floor, Jongin knew. It was okay. They were okay. The elder accepted Jongin's words as much as Jongin accepted Minseok's troubles, his efforts at getting better and those to not get in the way. They were okay. Jongin straightened his back, seated on the couch. The two young men glanced at each other, almost shyly, testing the field. Minseok smiled. Jongin chuckled like he always did.

Things were going to be fine.

Jongin got up from the couch, cracking his knuckles one against another as he looked down at Minseok, still seated.

“Well, I'm gonna fetch up something for your--”

One door burst out open in the dorms hallway. A silhouette ran across the corridor, reaching for the bathroom, and soon someone was puking in the toilets. Jongin made a small noise of disgust – he still hadn't caught that virus, that bastard – before turning to Minseok.

“I'm… gonna go help Luhan hyung first. I don't think he likes to lay on the floor with the scent of his vomit.”

Minseok chuckled sympathetically. Jongin and him were probably going to stay with Luhan, today. This was going to be a long day, full of cartoons.

A/N : I'm sorry for the wait ! I like the first half of it better, but I needed to get the fic moving so yeah. I hope you like it, it feels a bit more heavy/angsty than the other parts tho.