“I’m sorry about what I said. I was just angry. I didn’t mean it.”

They were in the living room. Chaerin was sitting on the sofa and Jiyong was sitting on the chair in front of her.

She nodded her head. She’s calmed down now but she still felt hurt by his words. They haven’t seen each other for a long time and that’s what he says when they’re finally face to face.

“What are you doing here?” She asked.

Jiyong sighed and looked down. “I came to see you.”

Chaerin crooked her head. “Why?” doesn’t he have a girlfriend to go see instead?

“I miss you—“

“Stop.” Chaerin raised her hand. She can’t hear any more of this. “Where’s Kiko?”

Jiyong was taken aback with her question. “What?”

“Kiko. Where is she? Isn’t she the one you’re supposed to miss?” Chaerin remembered the article she saw about them and shook her head.

“I don’t know where she is. Why are you asking about her?” he asked, confused.

“Because she’s your girlfriend and you’re here. Aren’t you supposed to be with her?” Chaerin accused.

That shocked Jiyong. Doesn’t she know?

“We broke up…” he quietly said.

Now it’s Chaerin’s turn to be shocked. But something took over her. Maybe a defense for herself or maybe the walls she built are finally starting to work.

“So you’re coming to me for comfort? Again?” She said. This happened before. Many times before. And she was always there for him. Always.

“Chae… I—“

“You better go back home.” She said coldly.

Jiyong was surprised by the coldness in her voice. It was the first time he had heard it.

“Chae, why are you being like this? Please don’t push me away.” Jiyong stood up and approached her but she stood up too, making him stop.

“Just… just go home, Ji. I don’t have any more energy to fight with you.”

“I don’t wanna fight. I’m here to see you. I wanna spend some time. Chae…” he doesn’t know what else to say.

She heard that many times before but now she willed herself not to fall again. She had promised herself that she’ll be stronger, that she’ll love herself more.

“I’m leaving. I have a lot to do.”

“Chae…”

“Please don’t stop me. Have a safe flight home, oppa.” She said, picked up her bag and went for the door.

Jiyong couldn’t do anything but watch her leave. The longing he felt was deeper than it was for any other soul. He wanted to stop her but he couldn’t. The tone of her voice, the emptiness of her eyes. These were all new to him. What the hell has he done to her? What the hell happened to them?

“I guess it didn’t go as well as we’d hoped.” Youngbae whispered to Hyorin. The three of them were in the airport waiting for their flight and there was an undeniable dark cloud surrounding his best friend.

“Yeah. That’s too bad.” Hyorin said.

Jiyong had his headphones on with the volume to the maximum. He wanted to tune out everything. He wanted to be alone. He wanted to see her again. He wanted to be with her. .

Had he wasted all those chances? Did he take her for granted? Did he hurt her that bad? Jerk. . Douchebag. Those are all he could think about himself.

He closed his eyes and tried to calm down. He was getting too angry. Too frustrated. At himself. At everyone.

“Oppa! Look at this!” the cute girl beside her said as she showed her phone to him. It was a funny picture of him. It was a stolen shot and his nostrils were flared up.

They both laughed at the image. With her teasing his big nostrils.

He fought back by tickling her until she couldn’t breathe. They ended up laughing like teenagers not caring about who would see them.

“Yah oppa, you really have big nostrils.” The girl teased making Jiyong pout cutely. “Aww. But you’re still handsome, oppa.” She said, gently patting his head making him smile instantly.

“You’re cute~” Jiyong pinched her cheeks until they turned really red.

“Ow! Oppa!” the girl whined but was still smiling.

She turned back to her phone and played with it. Jiyong just stared at her. She wasn’t just cute. She was beautiful. The way her eyes disappear when she smiles, the way her lips pout unknowingly when she’s confused, the way she scrunches her nose when she disapproves of something. He sees it all.

He extends his hand to touch her face but he couldn’t. He couldn’t move. He starts to panic. He tries to move with all his might. He calls out for her but she doesn’t respond. She doesn’t even look at his direction. The smile on her face suddenly turns to a frown. He calls out to her again but nothing comes out of his mouth. He couldn’t even hear himself. He couldn’t move. His eyes become teary and so does hers.

“Chae!”

“JI!”

His eyes open and he sees Youngbae’s worried face in front of him. “Are you okay? You were having a nightmare.” He said.

Jiyong looked around and they were still at the airport. He must’ve drifted.

He shook his head. Some nightmare.

“Oh. Where’s Jiyong oppa?” Harin wondered when she saw her sister enter the house.

“Why are you looking for him?” Chaerin asked and put her bag down.

“I definitely thought you two would be together.” Harin said, totally confused and disappointed. “You’re even wearing his clothes.” Harin said, pointing at what Chaerin was wearing.

“Well, we’re not.” Chaerin said and sat down the couch. “We never were.” She murmured.

“What happened to you two, unnie?” Harin asked, sitting beside her sister.

Chaerin smiled sadly. ‘What happened to them?’ the question that also lingers in her mind. Or maybe it wasn’t what happened to them. Maybe it was what didn’t happen? Maybe it was the broken promises? The pain and uncertainty of waiting? Or everything put together.

But Chaerin wanted to be strong for herself. She wanted to move on. Tsk. Move on. Until now, she’s still not one step into that process.

“YG found out you two went to LA, without asking.” Seungri said as soon as Youngbae and Jiyong entered the dorm.

“YAH! You ratted on us, didn’t you?” Youngbae said, ready to tackle Seungri with the help of Jiyong but stopped when he saw him uncaringly just walk to his room and shut the door.

“Sooo, I guess it didn’t work out?” Seungri asked.

“You think?” Youngbae shook his head.

“Well…” Seungri started.

“What?” Youngbae asked, curious.

“Well… don’t you think that hyung deserves this? I mean, he made her wait for nothing plus he has Kiko so Chaerin is what, like a back-up?”

Youngbae just shook his head. As much as he wanted to deny it, the maknae was right. “Yah. Don’t let Jiyong hear you say that or he really might beat your .” Youngbae said and proceeded to his own room.

Jiyong lie flat on his bed, staring at the ceiling blankly, replaying everything that happened for the past years.

He remembered spending most of his time with her… but only if Kiko wasn’t around.

He remembered always buying stuff for her whenever he’s overseas or whenever he sees something he thought she might like, even if he’s also buying it for himself making it look like he’s buying couple stuff. He didn’t care.

He remembered Kiko starting a fight about it.

He remembered not giving her some of the things he bought because Kiko got mad about it.

He remembered her singing while cooking for him. He remembered her working really hard to compose songs. She didn’t know he watched her work hard in the studio in the wee hours of the morning.

He remembered one night, when he was on his way home, he had the urge to check 2NE1’s recording studio. He was thankful for that urge because there, he found Chaerin, alone, writing lyrics and listening to a melodious tune. He didn’t think twice and entered, startling her.

He remembered her face turn up to a smile when she saw him. His face mirroring hers. He read the lyrics she wrote, listened to the songs she made and shared what he thought.

He remembered her thanking him for helping her that night but it wasn’t necessary. He supported her and he felt happy about it. He liked spending time with her, even if they weren’t doing anything. Being in her presence is enough. She fell asleep on the couch and as he watched her sleep, inspiration hit. Ride or Die was born that night.

But he suddenly realized something. All his memories of her were from 2 to 6 years ago. He tried thinking about the past year and only a few popped in his mind. He got so busy. He was in Japan a lot of times. Kiko demanded he stay there for long periods of time.

He closed his eyes and a tear fell to the side of his face. He made many wrong decisions but what he regret the most was letting her slip through his fingers.

Sorry for the wait... I hope you like it. :) Tell me what you think. Thanks for reading!