Standing in the dark
Henber Shorts Shelfinspired by Amber's song reccomendation that i happened to fall in love with
{WARNING} Angst
"What am I doing here, Amber?"
Henry asks from across the table-for-two. His best friend had called him over to meet at a local coffee shop in the middle of a brewing rainstorm
"I wanted to meet up with you because I wanted to apologize." her voice was serious and her forehead wrinkled
"Not this again, Am. I told you. It's all cool. I'm alright."
She looks at him dead in the eye
"Are you?"
Henry hesitates. He is still hurting. And no matter how many times he tells her a lie that he's alright, Amber is his best friend. She can tell whenever he lies.
"I... I'm not. God, of course I'm not. I can't lie, can I?"
He smiles apologetically and she reassures him with a grin
"You never can"
It has been, what, almost a month now. Amber broke up with Henry. Their relationship as more-than-just-friends for almost a year that never really got into tabloids since everyone saw their bond as friends and nothing more than that. Everyone got used to hearing them deny the fact that they could fall for each other at one point.
And that one point had finally occurred.
It was one of those normal days in the company. It had been months since they last saw each other, considering their busy schedules.
It took them that entire duration of being away from each other to reflect on their own and soul-search. Maybe it was time for them to move forward. Test the waters if they could do better as a couple than as the best of friends.
"A guy and a gal can never be just friends, you know. You'd fall for him or he's gonna fall for you. Better yet, you guys might develop something mutual." Amber remembers Victoria say.
God, she hoped she was right. About the latter part. If only Henry felt the same way for her.
The day they finally met was when she confirmed it. She thought it was the happiest day of her life. Finally getting those pent up feelings of longing from her chest. Little did she know, Henry felt the exact same way.
Just a few weeks ago, Amber had suddenly called it quits. The same night, he lay down on his bed, wide awake until the sun came. He shifts to face the other side of the bed. It seemed like only a few nights ago, Amber was there, lying next to him. Smiling at his corny jokes and laughing about how much of a trash he is. And of course how lucky she was to have him.
What had changed over the few nights?
The question that haunted him until he drowned in intoxication
She had sent him a hundred unanswered text messages and left him dozens of missed calls
Henry hadn't picked up his phone and attended practices for two days and just drowned himself in alcohol.
"Hey, let's talk. You can come over." He calls her up and before she could even say "hello", said the one line sentence.
Amber came knocking on his door an hour later
The first thing she did was give him a hug. She didn't care if he wasn't up to giving her a hug in return. All she knows is she had missed him and she wished she could change everything. She hoped she hadn't hurt Henry. She looks up at him and saw his blank eyes and pale face. He reeked of alcohol and the smell of his bed's sheets.
She buried her face on his chest as her tears began to fall. Henry finally hugged her back, pressing the back of her head closer to him.
He breathes in a long inhale.
"You're a mess. But I'll hear you out" he laughs
She fell out of love for him. Well, the kind of love she thought she felt for him. No matter how much and how many times she convinced herself that this was what she wanted, it just didn't fit. It could have only just been a crush on him. Or the rumors had finally overwhelmed her.
Hearing all of it, Henry wasn't sure if this was all real or just a really bad dream
"I've cried. Believe me, I cried for nights, too, Henry." she reaches out to touch his hand, and he hold on to hers. How he longed to hear her, talk to her and touch her.
"I never wanted to hurt you. And it kills me every single night. This guilt consumes me all the time." Amber's tears started trickling down once more
"I should never have entered in a relationship with you. I know it hurts how I regret when I tell you that I'm happy with you and I sharing a relationship. But it would hurt even more if I carried on pretending to be happy when the truth is, I'm...not. You're my best friend. And I shouldn't give you false hopes that we would end well together as a couple. I shouldn't have hurt my best friend. And yet here I am, the dingus that did just that. And for all of that, I am so sorry, Henry"
Amber caves in on her side of the couch. Apologizing in between tears and sobs.
Henry sits closer to her, giving her a tight hug he had always wanted to give the moment she arrived at his door.
He hushes her, telling her it's OK. And that he completely understood. Even though he didn't.
But he will try to understand everything. Understand his best friend.
"It's alright, Am. I'm alright. If you only see me as your best friend, then I'm cool with that. If you don't want to be in a relationship with anymore, now that you've explained everything, I'm cool with that. If you want to cry your eyeballs out tonight, I'm cool with that. But you need to promise me..."
She stopped apologizing and started to listen to his steady breathing
He waits for her to respond but all she did was breathe, listening to the silence. He could hear her shudder and sob but he goes on
"I want us to still be best friends. No matter what. Even if you meet someone new. You can always talk to me openly about it. It may hurt, but I'll be okay. He better treat you well... One more thing, you should never even try to make me stop loving you. Even if I hurt myself doing it, never mind about it. You got that?" he shakes her in his arms and she hesitates at first, but nods anyway.
"Can I spend the night over?" she asks, looking up at him who was drying her tear-stained cheeks
That was the last night she had spent the night on the same bed as his. Only tonight, there was less touching, less talking. Most of the time, they just stared at each other. Their eyes, misty and their smiles, friendly.
"I can be your steppingstone." he whispers at her
"You can always try new things with me. Even if you count me as scratch. If it makes you a better person. I'll always be here."
"Thanks, Henry." she scoots over closer to him and hugs him. "I love you, my best friend."
"I love you, too"
It was already pouring hard when they decided to get out of the coffee shop.
"Wanna walk in the rain?" He asks her and she smiles
"Will it be fun?"
"Everything is fun when you do it with your best friend!" Henry grabs her by the arm and runs along the drenched streets of Seoul
They arrive at an apartment building when Amber smiles at him "This is my stop"
her eyes squinting at the water, flowing in
"You tell me if he treats you bad, alright?"
Amber nods and runs inside towards the lobby. Through the glass wall, she waves him goodbye.
Kris twirls her from behind, saying inaudible things. He was probably commenting about her being soaked to the bone
As if the rain washed away all his hurt, he smiles as he sees the person who was crying her heart out on his chest, smile again.
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