We spent the entire summer together with laughter, forever imprinted moments and most importantly in sheer, perfect, rollercoaster twisting love that was something I had never experienced before.

Every day after I had been released from the hospital, was a day that went to spend the remaining days with Krystal before I would return over to the states again. It was in hopes of regaining my vision; the hospital all the way in Los Angeles seemingly being more suitable to take on the operation over there. The chances were still on that low twenty percent, and it cost a lot, but I figured that it was a chance to take because I couldn’t lose anything more.

I was concerned if my parents could afford it; I even offered paying for the surgery myself with my savings from my job plus the money Mr. Choi gave me for the painting of Krystal. It wasn’t really much, but I found out it was just enough to pay the entire thing and a bit more. However, what I didn’t expect was the fact that it was already paid for the minute we sort of booked it.

No one told me who, and even though I asked my main suspect (Krystal of course); it actually wasn’t the scarlet red haired girl at all. She seemed just as surprised as me by the thought of someone doing something so generous towards me. However, I still had no idea who it was as I sat on the soft mattress of my room.

My bag was conveniently placed just beside my bed, packed up with more clothes for just a simple trip, but not really enough for what I had planned on.

Since all of my savings weren’t used on actually traveling and paying for the surgery, I figured to sit down and have a long talk with my parents. It was about what I wanted to do if the operation was successful, which they seemed a bit reluctant to at first because it was quite huge and risky, especially for a girl as young as me.

But my argument was that I had to learn to stand on my own, to stop being so dependent on others because despite what I liked to believe I had never been fully reliant on myself. That was what I wanted, and that was what sparked my decision.

“I don’t know how long this journey will take,” I said to them as we sat on the dining table just a few hours ago, letting them know about what I was going to do. “But I need inspiration that is not from this part of the country, but from the world from my own eyes, just like grandma did.”

There were also the questions about what I would do with Mr. Choi’s offer. Well, he understood me as well and found another way for things to work. The thing was that I’d meet up with him when I could to learn and work on business, but I was also free to go wherever I wanted at the same time.

I knew that I didn’t have a huge amount of money on me, but that was beyond the point; I didn’t need some fancy hotel or expensive meals. The only thing I wanted was my vision intact, empty pages on a sketch book and the world in front of me ready to be drawn.

I’m only eighteen; I’m still young and I’m not exactly a grown up quite yet, but I’m legally allowed to make my own decisions.

It took them a while, but they finally gave in as they realized how bad I wanted this; to stand on my own and be free. They would support me no matter what, and I had never been so glad for their agreement after a long time.

Despite them insisting on financially helping me, I declined because as mentioned I wanted to take care of myself. Besides, if the surgery didn’t succeed then they’d have to spend more money on getting permanent assistance for me around the house because I wouldn’t be able to be alone anymore.

I had been hyper aware of my surroundings ever since the day I woke up from that coma, which made it easier for me to navigate around the house although I would not trust myself well enough to do hard tasks like cooking and attempting to fix something.

However I heard stuff much easier, which made it almost simple to tell the difference between the buzz of the refrigerator or the washing machine in the laundry room beside it. Sometimes I could just stand and listen, deciphering the noises around me until I understood where I was.

The buzz of my phone vibrated through the bed as I was quick to feel my way through it and grab the object, quickly pressing the answer button after a few attempts before I could hear the person on the other line.

“So you talked to them?” I asked Krystal, knowing well what we both were doing tonight although I was sure she must have been having a tougher time than I accepting the fact.

She sighed on the other line, some movement from her side before she bothered replying. “They didn’t take it good, but there is nothing they can do about it now. I asked them to give the company away to anyone else; I didn’t really bother knowing who, because I’m sure about what I’m going to do now.”

I nodded slightly while humming, my fingers grasping the outlines from my soft duvet while sitting there. “Did you tell them about us?” I asked then, although I figured there wasn’t much to tell except for the fact that we were a couple who had basically already ended things.

We sort of broke up yesterday, although at the same time we didn’t. It was hard to explain, but the way we parted sounded more like a promise than saying goodbye.

“No, I didn’t see the need to infuriating my parents further; besides we’re not officially together anymore,” Krystal then said as I leaned down on the pillow, glad for once I didn’t bump my head into the wall before continuing to speak.

“We’re not officially over either,” I reminded her then, thinking about the way we sort of ended things in an odd way. “We made a promise after all; it’s just how we’re going to keep it that is the toughest part.”

I could hear her move again, as if adjusting the position she was sitting or lying in again. “I know, it’s just weird how we started and ended things so quickly,” Krystal said softly, and I understood what she meant because it had been as said a huge rollercoaster ride.

“You know why I said we’d have to end it in some way or another,” I said then, a slightly tight feeling in my throat as I lied there with my eyes closed, looking at nothing.

“I know; we’re not going to see each other in a long time, if ever, and I didn’t want to hold you back from finding someone else,” she shared then, the words of what she said the day before wandering through my head. “I just liked the idea of us meeting again, totally randomly, still having the same feelings towards one another.”

Smiling slightly, I wanted to say that I was sure my feelings for her wouldn’t vanish just like that. Although the distance was too much for both of us to bear, especially when I was so uncertain of what was to happen, we both agreed it would be better like this.

I didn’t break up with her, and she didn’t break up with me; it was more a mutual decision based on what we both felt. It was painful, because I didn’t really want to leave her behind, but we knew that reality had to come back in one way or another.

“Maybe we will,” I said absentmindedly then before placing the covers over my body, the night growing deeper as I’d have an important flight to catch tomorrow. “No matter what, I won’t forget you, you know that right?”

I could practically feel her smile on the other line, and despite me not having seen it for a long, long time it still awoke certain emotions inside just by the thought. The image of her dancing on that stage, her smile that shone through the spotlight, the first time I even saw it… I would never admit that I painted that image not too long after it happened, stowed away just for my eyes to see (albeit I couldn’t see it right now), yet I wondered one day if she would find it.

“You remind me of a song,” she said then, and as I sleepily turned around a bit to adjust my position underneath the blankets, I could only wonder why. “It was one of the first ones I learned on the piano.”

I smiled then, my mind suddenly imagining how the shining stars used to look like during the night. I would have looked out the window to watch them now, if I could.

“Play it for me, then,” I said, because although I had heard her sing and seen her dance before she had never played the piano in front of me. She knew how to play as she had been practicing since she was around seven. It was admirable how musically gifted she was; her dance was magnificent, her voice was close to angelic and I had no doubt that her skills on the piano wouldn’t be the same.

I heard a lot of shuffling then, a lot of dragging and suddenly the line was cut off. For a moment I felt my heart stop beating for a second, instant worry surrounding my body as I almost awoke from my slightly sleepy daze immediately.

Then, after a minute of panicking my phone suddenly buzzed in my hands. Carefully and clumsily clicking on the answer button, it didn’t take long before I was greeted by the sound nothing. “Are you there?” I asked worriedly, quite certain Krystal was the one calling me.

However, instead of the soft familiar voice I rather heard the beginning keys of a piano playing in a small distance. Soft and slowly, the melody of a hauntingly beautiful song rang through the room she was playing in, towards the phone and into my ears as I could only take in the sudden sound.

The whole piece felt as a serene and calm type of setting, which made me instantly drift off to different thoughts; about how we started talking to each other, the days spent painting her, the moment I met Jessica again towards when it ended, when Krystal went out with Kai despite her real feelings to the point where we ended up now.

I thought of the entire summer spent together yet again; the probably stupid smile on my face, the stolen kisses, the funny bickering and everything in between as we spent hours upon hours doing nothing yet feeling complete.

Listening to Krystal play with such emotion, with such preciseness and the perfect atmosphere it wasn’t hard to see that the girl was gifted in so many ways. Hearing her play, sing or watching her dance was something alike discovering the sun breaking through a row of dark clouds, right after a great storm. It was paralyzing in the most beautiful way possible, leaving me breathless in an attempt that only she managed to achieve.

I knew that a piano had eighty eight keys in total, and it made me think that if love ever was an instrument, I would like it to be that instrument. It has eighty eight keys, double infinity, and it had the power to make me feel a hundred of different emotions all at once as I just lied there in the night.

Then as time went by, a small smile appeared on my lips until the very last key was played, echoing throughout the air as my entire being felt sleepy all of the sudden. I felt as if I was lulled into sleep by her playing, by her first and probably last song that she shared with me.

“I love you Ara,” Krystal said then, as simple as that. It was the first time she had ever directly uttered those words to me and I had never felt happier. Only three small, yet powerful words we hadn’t shared with each other before, and I felt as if I was about to soar. We hadn’t said them even when we kissed for the first time, when we went on countless small dates together… not even when I woke up with her right next to me during lazy afternoon naps.

Everything about how we acted towards one another did scream those words of affection, of so much depth, yet they were never uttered. I was a hundred percent sure I had said I loved her a thousand times through my smile, through my hugs, through my kisses and every other moment I spent with her.

“I love you too, Soojung.”