A terrifyingly loud alarm pierces my apparently conscious mind, and I jolt up in place. Heart's pounding, forehead is glazed with sweat, I'm feeling lightheaded.. Maybe a little dizzy. The alarm is still going, so I unplug it from the wall and exhale a breath I didn't even know I'd been holding. My hand reaches up to rub my face, still half asleep and half awake in a world that never seems to cease my curiosity and questioning.

Voices are heard outside this room, appearing to be my room, back at the dorm. I'm in an outfit I don't remember putting on, in fact I don't even remember how I got here to begin with. My body slowly lifts off the bottom bunk, then walks cautiously over to a mirror that lies above the dresser. My hair... It's-it's brown. My own reflection stares at me in mockery as I attempt to decipher this puzzle. When did I redye it?

I shake my head and slap myself twice on the cheek, but still no luck in shaking this occurrence from me. This cheek, from me having remembered, isn't bruised or swollen from me having fallen on it. In fact the last thing I distinctly recall was the feeling of cold cement on my face before everything went black. Now everything isn't as clear to me. Nothing makes sense anymore. I don't even know what day it is. What is happening? I need to know before I go crazy.

I burst through the door of my room with a crazed expression, hungry for knowledge and understanding of this mess.. Mess of a dream it had to be. Nothing more than a dream that presented itself as reality, just to mess with my head.

I tumble over my own eager steps as I make it down the hallway, only to find myself in an empty, limitless white surroundment. In a daze, I examine the area around me, completely terrified but not able to say a word. I try to scream but out comes muffled echoes of what I was meaning to say. This isn't only a dream, this is a nightmare. One I can never escape from.

The lungs inside me deflate only to be filled back up again in return for unachieved screams, going on for what seemed like eternity. My body is now limp on the "ground" with nothing else around me. I don't exist, I never have.

I'm paranoid, shaking, quivering. On edge and my senses are sharp. I can feel the environment around me. I can see beyond what I couldn't. Why do I now suddenly understand what is to come in the future? I.. I see something. A-a man.. He's tall, and young.. and innocent. His motives aren't bad, and I feel safe.

Without knowing I stand up and begin to place one foot after the other, I don't know where I'm going so that makes me slightly panic. Once again, I am unable to show anything on the outside, if anything I am only an energy, so I let it control me. This.. mass of light that I am attracted to ever so easily.

The closer I get to it, the brighter it shines, until the beam overpowers me and I fall through the ground, tumbling downwards in a spiral staircase motion, towards a bottomless pit in which I call earth.

I wake up.

Endless beeping increasing in speed as my chest heaves up and down. I am back in my hospital bed, and all around me are six faces, streaming tears and furrowed brows completing their expressions. Mine furrow as well, and all of them let out their own way of expressing relief, crowding around me and crushing me in hugs. I could feel their trembling bodies.

"You.. You were having a nightmare," Taehyung informs me as he retreats from his embrace and wipes the right side of his face with the long sleeve of his shirt. "I... I was?" All I could think to say coming out as a timid question. Taehyung nods and continues to stare at me as if he would never be able to see me again. I look around the room, this time a little closer and slower than before, and my eyes fall upon Jungkook who is kneeling at the foot of this bed, peering over like some sort of child. The child he is can never leave his side, much like this side of me.

The corner of my closed mouth twitches into a slight form of acknowledgment, and before I could even think of what to say to him, he gets up from where he once sat and rushes to my side, surprising and leaving me speechless as his hair is glued to the nape of my neck and his arms are wrapped over my shoulders, locked tightly together ever so firmly that I couldn't nearly wriggle out of it.

He didn't say a word, but the newly fallen tears on my shoulder spoke louder than anything he could've said. Before long tears were falling from my eyes as well, heartbroken and relieved that Jeon Jungkook was so worried about me for whatever reason, that he is here crying along with I.

I his head full of hair, burying my fingers through his luscious black strands and savoring every moment of us this close. Probably the closest I've ever physically been to him. Eventually I lay my head down upon his and a moment longer of us laying on each other passes before Kookie lifts his head off of my chest and looks into my eyes, irises shaking and the red veins showing through the whites of his pure eyes.

"Jiminie hyung?" He finally speaks, lifting his eyebrows and fiddling with the string to my hospital gown. I tilt my head and move a piece of hair that was draping a little too low on his face out of the way, and his mouth gaped the slightest bit as I smiled at him lovingly. "Hm?" I respond.

"I.. I need to tell you something," he declares, darting between my gaze in search of reassurance. "Sure, anything?" Kookie looks over to the other members and his head towards the front door of the room, and as if they had discussed this already like a layed out blueprint, each and every one of them got up and left us alone in the room together.

Once they all exited, Jungkook took my hands in his and held them tightly, rubbing the top of my hand with his thumb. The heart monitor's beeping increased and Jungkookie chuckled in response to the sound, while my breathing was unable to be controlled unbeknownst to him.

"Hyung..." He began, now looking down at our intertwined hands. "I.. I was so worried about you. So worried that you would never wake up. Every day that went on without you by my side was torture."

I never looked away from Jungkook as he struggled to piece together his words perfectly, and once again, his hand never lifted from mine.

"Coming to see you whenever I had the opportunity couldn't ever be enough for me once I left this place, so I always came back. I can't seem to be apart from you.. And I kinda hate that," He smiles bittersweetly, lips quavering as his eyes collect tears and my eyebrows furrow in concern. "Jungkookie.." I begin to say, but he looks up at me, just when a tear starts to fall from his right eye. I watch it trickle down his cheek, until he wipes it away and my eyes linger up to his lips.

"For some reason I think this is all my fault, all of it. It's all because of me and I'm so sorry," He expresses, lowering his head down on my chest and I grab his shoulders, shaking him the slightest bit. "Jungkookie! None of this is your fault! You are only a teenager, you couldn't have caused all of this." I remind him, and his eyes linger off to the side, attempting to acknowledge my words.

I stare at him a little longer until I figured he wouldn't return the gaze while in the midst of deep thinking, so I look down at my lap, where Jungkookie's hands are still clasping onto mine. "Hyung," He whispers, now scarily and thrillingly close to my face. I can feel his breath on me, sending chills down my spine. His eyes travel down to my lips and back up to my eyes, still holding onto my hand.

"I love you," He finally speaks in a soft voice, and leans closer to me ever so slowly and gingerly that I could feel myself think a million thoughts per second before the proximity between us becomes smaller and smaller, eventually to the point where I wasn't left with any room to move about. His lips were conjoined with mine, and they were still getting closer. My eyes closed and so were his, and in that moment I knew that this was a reality that couldn't be mistaken for a fantasy dream or nightmare. He is mine, always and forever. I love you Jeon Jungkookie.

~End of diary entry~ October 14th 2015

"Wow, that is almost exactly how I remembered it," Jungkook says, sitting between my legs and looking up at me as I close my leather journal and set it off to the side. "I couldn't leave a detail out," I respond, leaning down to kiss him. I smile to myself as I rest my head on his, thinking of how I ever got so lucky to have him. "I love you too," He says, snuggling into my stomach and falling asleep as I run my fingers through his hair.

I needed you, Jeon Jungkook. And now I got you.