“Taekwoon.” His father had slipped his head through his bedroom door and called him softly while he was doing homework, his back to the door. An ice cold, sinking feeling filled him for a second, so sure that his father had found out already that he and Wonshik had skipped school that day.

“Hm?” He answered cautiously, trying to seem oblivious, not turning to look at him. He heard his footsteps as he moved into his room and towards him. “Phone call from your teacher.” He left the house phone beside his arm, on the desk, and turned and left. Taekwoon breathed in relief, and then frowned. Mr. Cha?

He picked up the phone while his gut stirred with worry.

“Hello?”

“Hello, Taekwoon.” The teacher’s tone of voice sounded tired and worried. His stomach coiled. “I- ahh, where do I even begin…” Mr. Cha hesitated, mumbling into the phone, making Taekwoon even more worried that something serious might have happened. His first thought was if something had happened to Wonshik after they parted ways when school hours were over. They had ran away from the school grounds, Wonshik knowing where to jump the fence without getting caught, and they spent the entire day in an arcade; playing games. Taekwoon would lose at everything. Wonshik would laugh. Taekwoon’s heart would threaten to burst at the sight.

“Jang Jinhae’s parents called me earlier.” The teacher hesitantly started after being quiet for what felt like several minutes. “They said you attacked him today. Is this true?” He could hear how much the teacher wished for it to not be. Guilt spread through him like a black cloud for making the teacher disappointed. He was an alright teacher after all; always nice to them.

He cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, Mr. Cha.” He heard the other inhale through the phone. “No, no, don’t be. I know more than you think, Taekwoon.” The teacher rushed out immediately. “I know what Jinhae and his friends have been doing to Wonshik, I’m sure you were just trying to help your friend, right?” Taekwoon nodded, then realized he was on the phone and muttered a ‘yes’.

There was a silence between them, he could hear the teacher sigh several times, but he got the feeling that it wasn’t because of him. He prepared the words carefully in his head before he asked the question that had been bothering him for many days already.

“Mr. Cha… why won’t the school do anything about Wonshik’s bullying?”

The teacher inhaled sharply, and then released the air again in a hopeless sigh. Like all strength had left him. “It’s very complicated, Taekwoon. It’s not something you as a student should know, either. I’m afraid I can’t tell you without risking my job.” He sighed again. “I’m so sorry.”

There was a silent pause again, this time Taekwoon the one sighing. He didn’t understand what exactly could keep the school from stopping the bullying of a single student.

“Taekwoon, I’m really sorry you have to deal with this, but-“ He groaned on the other side of the line. “There’s a problem.” He stated. Taekwoon frowned, hand holding the phone tightening the grip. He didn’t say anything, just waited for him to continue.

“Jinhae’s parents want you to give an official apology. In front of them, Jinhae and the principal.” He huffed. “Your father and I will have to be there too.”

Taekwoon’s stomach sank into the abyss. The thought of standing in front of a group of people he did not know and apologize for something he was not sorry for doing. He groans into the phone and whines ever so slightly, forgetting it’s his teacher on the line.

“Teach… please?” He basically whimpered and borrowed Wonshik’s nickname for him to try to be more appealing, desperate to get away.

“I already told your father.” Taekwoon let out another groan, bending over his desk. “Don’t worry, I told him it’s not your fault. Wonshik was really insistent on that part.” Taekwoon straightened in his chair abruptly. “Wonshik?”

“Yeah, I called him first to hear his side of the story of course.” He assured him.

“Is he- Is he in trouble?” He asked nervously. He was answered immediately; “No! No, no, he didn’t touch anyone for once.” A breathy laugh hinted that Wonshik had this conversation with his teacher quite often. He wondered how many times exactly Wonshik had apologized to these people for something that wasn’t really his fault. It bothered him greatly that he couldn’t ask why exactly.

He finds himself wanting to call Wonshik and talk.

“Anyway, I’ll make some more calls and we’ll find a good time for everyone to get this over with, alright?” He’s reminded of what he has to do, but feels better now that he knew Wonshik probably had to do it a number of times and his case was even more unfair. 

“Yes, Teach.”

“Again, I’m sorry I can’t fix this…” He sounded so hopeless over the phone and Taekwoon feels guilty for whining so much. He knew teachers had minimal power at the school, despite popular belief. “It’s okay, it’s not your fault either.” He murmurs quietly, guilt stinging his insides. The teacher asks him to give the phone back to his father and he accepted it in the kitchen with an encouraging smile that Taekwoon saw when he finally dared to look up at him after avoiding his gaze the entire walk from his desk to the kitchen. His father had been waiting, a big cup of his precious green tea in hand. He returned to his room right away to call Wonshik with his own phone.

“Taekwoon? What’s up?” 

He felt better he moment he heard Wonshik’s voice through the phone, and relaxed; falling down backwards onto his bed with a sigh. “I wanted to see if you’re alright.” He mumbled; feeling embarrassed for showing he cared.

“Me? I’m the one who should be asking. Did you talk to Teach yet?”
“Yeah”
“I’m sorry.” Wonshik told him and Taekwoon frowned at the guilt.

“It’s not your fault.” He tried to assure him, knowing all too well how that never worked. But it was still nice to hear.

“I still feel bad.” Wonshik said weakly.

“Don’t.” He demanded and Wonshik’s breathy chuckle that makes him so weak was like music to his ears. He was about to groan at the sound - at how it makes his chest flutter - but caught himself before it was too late. “I’m fine.” He said sincerely and smiles warmly as if Wonshik could see him. He had a feeling the other would hear it somehow.

“I’ll make it up to you.” Wonshik then said and Taekwoon’s brow peaked in interest. He made a sound of curiousness and Wonshik continued; “I’ll write you a song.” He promised. Taekwoon could never understand quite why, but the promise made his words catch in his throat. He had to clear his throat to be able to speak again. “Once I learn how.” He could almost see Wonshik rubbing his neck while he said that.

“So you’re joining the music club?” He sat up in his bed, felt excited about having Wonshik do music. To do something else than being alone in that empty home. It made him feel like he would dare to join the club as well. For some strange reason, doing music always seemed like something far away from him. But now it felt closer. Within reach. He could almost touch it. It made his heart beat faster in anticipation.

“Yeah.”

“Good.” He thought he could hear Wonshik’s smile and smiles widely. “Yeah.” Wonshik sighed into the phone.

“Taekwoon?”

His entire body startles at the sound of his father’s voice in his room, having been too caught up in the phone conversation to notice his father peeking in the door. He lowered the phone. “Yes?”

“Can I talk to you a little?” His father asked, and Taekwoon finally noticed the worry his father had masked away with the smile earlier. Nodding yes to his father first, he quickly tells Wonshik he’ll talk to him later and hangs up as his father comes to sit on the end of the bed. Taekwoon had positioned himself against the wall on the other end when talking on the phone.

He chews his lip as he waits for his father to speak. He knew he wasn’t angry with him for what he did for Wonshik, not after Mr. Cha explaining it to him, but the man had other reasons to worry. This was his fourth school after all. His parents were hoping so much that there would be no more transfers, even though they did not tell him that directly. If he said he had to, they would let him anyway. It all made him feel so incredibly guilty for being such a bother to them.

His father sighed and Taekwoon knew he didn’t want to ask what he was about to ask him.

“Should I be worried?” He asked, looking Taekwoon in the eyes as he did. There was so much more in the words than what was said out loud. Years of struggle. Taekwoon swallowed dryly because he felt so guilty he almost wanted to cry, but shook his head. This time he would not go anywhere. He would persevere whatever came at him; no matter what.

“Does Wonshik know?” Taekwoon couldn’t help but flinch a little. He knew he would have to tell Wonshik everything eventually; he wanted to be honest with him. He had enjoyed his time so much he hadn’t really noticed it passed so quickly. He supposed it was time.

“No.” He said with his eyes closed. The sigh his father let out was a tired one, making him open his eyes again, but only to look at his own twinning fingers in his lap.

“Do you think he will care?” The question was asked carefully, making his father’s feelings almost in front of him. He cared so much for Taekwoon, and he was so worried he would be hurt again by someone they all thought they could rely on. Taekwoon shakes his head without hesitation.

“Wonshik is good, dad. Through and through.” He really believed that and said it with confidence; looking up again. His father’s shoulders relaxed a little and he seemed more assured. He hadn’t been this confident last time, when it had gone so horribly wrong.

“I believe you.” That made Taekwoon smile shyly. His father got up from the bed and turned to him. “Tell him soon though, okay? Get it out of your way.” He gave a slight smile and walked out of his bedroom after receiving an affirmative from Taekwoon.

--

It was on the next day that Wonshik and Taekwoon found themselves standing together in front of the Teacher’s office early in the morning, before classes started, in order to ask for a signup sheet for the music club. When signing up for any club you usually had to sign up on the boards in the hallway during first week of every semester, but considering both of them had transferred in mid-semesters, they had been told to come to the office any time and simply request a signup sheet. If the club had room, they would be free to join.

Taekwoon knocked on the door and they waited, Wonshik leaning on the wall beside the door. He was clearly tired this morning, likely from getting up extra early to be here on time. They had texted for a while the evening before, and Taekwoon agreed to come with him to the office, Wonshik convinced that if he met any other teacher than Mr. Cha he would be ignored.

For once, though, the teacher opening the door was their own; greeting them with his always-so-brilliant smile.

“Good morning Taekwoon!” He said too loudly, and then noticed Wonshik behind the door. “And you too, Wonshik!” Just as brightly. Wonshik smiled at the teacher. “What can I do for you?”

“I’d like to sign up for the music club.” Wonshik said, a little quietly as if he was afraid someone else would hear it and jump out and mock him for it. Mr. Cha already seemed bright, but he somehow brightened up even more. “Of course! Give me a second and I’ll go fetch it.”

They smiled at each other while they waited, both of them feeling excited. Taekwoon’s heart was beating too, and felt a tug of determination. The door to the office was still open.

“One for me too, Mr. Cha!” He called through the door, sure he would hear. Wonshik’s smile brightened into a surprised but very happy grin and a hand came to pat his shoulder. Taekwoon felt a surge of excitement. He did it. He was going to do music. For real.

Mr. Cha returned with two sheets and handed them out while instructing what to fill out. “The music club is far from full, so you’re able to join for sure.” He assured them before they left to the classroom to start filling out the information. It was all questions about prior experience and what they would want to play.

They both sat at Wonshik’s desk, Taekwoon’s chair turned around, and filled it out it silence as the classroom slowly started filling up with classmates, only occasionally mumbling to each other about what they were filling out. Wonshik signed up for guitar and songwriting, Taekwoon for piano and singing; making Wonshik look at him in awe. “Sing for me next time.” He demanded, and Taekwoon could only nod yes despite the nervous clutch in his gut.

“Wanna stay over at my place next Friday?” Wonshik asked suddenly, out of the blue. Taekwoon looked up from his sheet, puzzled. Wonshik, giving him a dumb looking grin, continued; “I bought a coffee machine.”

He looked so proud when he said it. Taekwoon mused at him in slight confusion. “You don’t drink coffee.”

Wonshik’s grin grew. “You better come use it then, so it won’t be of waste.” He said, very satisfied as he continued writing his information. Taekwoon  snorted at how cheesy it was and shrugged. A waste indeed.