It happened about six months ago, I think. I had been taking care of Wonho for nearly a year at the time. He still hadn’t spoken, he still had nightmares and he still came into my room almost every night to feel safe. There’s been very little improvement other than his walking. The doctors, Yuan and myself were just starting to accept that he may never get better.

I was struggling to take care of Wonho, I didn’t want to admit it but it was getting harder. I was stressing because I was having to work more hours to get the pay for the appliances and food. Not only that but the restaurant was losing money and no one was quite sure how long we’d have a job for. Wonho couldn’t work and the hospital was barely paying anything to cover Wonho being here and not back in that room again.

Things probably couldn’t have gotten any worse than this. Or so I thought until I got a phone call from Yuan.

“Hello, Yuan. Why are you calling? I thought you were at work.” I said, it was 9 in the morning so he’d be at work already.

“Takuya, don’t let Wonho watch the news. I’m sorry about this but it’s better that you hear this from me.” He said quickly, I didn’t listen though. I was already turning on the news channel. I froze when I saw the caption running across the screen.

‘Psycho Nurse Leah Kim Granted Bail. Future Incarceration Unlikely.'

No! NO! She couldn’t be! She was mad! She couldn’t be let out! She even admitted that she was guilty!

“Takuya, Takuya! Calm down! Stop shouting and calm down! Turn off the TV! You need to calm down! I’ll be over soon, just do not panic and don’t tell Wonho!” Yuan almost shouted down the phone before hanging up the phone. I shut off the TV and threw the remote across the room! How could they let her out? What had she done that made them believe that she had earned the right to freedom? She’d taken the 6 of us against our will, forced us to love her and abused us!

Each thought came with a wave of anger and hurt, this couldn’t be! The rage consumed me, it spread through me like a cold fire burning through each vein and capillary. It overtook every nerve in my body, impulses firing off faster than ever until it consumed my mind and I saw everything with a red tint.

Suddenly my body felt like it wasn’t under my control. I was picking up anything I could and throwing it everywhere. Glass vases went flying, shattering against the wall. Magazines were torn and the paper fallen to the floor. The table was upended and the sofa and chairs lay on their backs and sides like they were injured or wounded soldiers, caught in a battle that wasn’t their fault.

I just collapsed under the weight of my own anger and just let the tears fall. I don’t know how long I stayed like that or how long I was angry for, I just lay there angry at myself. I promised Wonho that she wouldn’t be let out and now she was. Glass shards cut into me, scratched my skin and made me bleed but I lay there, waiting for the pain to just consume me. Any feeling was better than this, so I welcomed the pain with open arms.

I felt someone lift me up and move me away from the chaos of my own creation. I looked up expecting to see Yuan but instead I was met with a different caring gaze. Wonho carried me to my room, struggling slightly but he managed. I was too weak to protest but something told me that he wouldn’t stop even if I told him to. He lay me on my bed and took the first aid kit from the bathroom and returned to remove the small fragments of glass and bandage my cuts. The antiseptic stung in my wounds but it helped me forget about her.

He wouldn’t let me leave my room. Yuan had arrived about fifteen minutes after Wonho had found me and treated my cuts. When he asked what happened, I explained what happened, the anger, the tears, the cuts and Wonho helping me. He simply shook his head, cleaned up the living room and left saying that he’d be back tomorrow.

“Why are you doing this Wonho? This is my fault, I shouldn’t burden you like this.” I asked him that night. He had made sure that I stayed home, making me call in sick to work. He made me food and cared for me all day. He had nothing to do with this, no need to deal with the aftermaths of my own self-consuming anger.

He didn’t answer, probably because he didn’t have his notepad with him. I sat up and ask him again, looking him straight in the eye. “Why did you help me, Wonho? You carried me here, bandaged me and did everything for me. You didn’t have to do anything. I would have sorted myself out eventually or Yuan would’ve helped me when he got here. I’m supposed to be helping you so why are you helping me?”

He looked at me and nodded before getting up to leave the room. He stopped at the door and turned back and sat on the bed next to me. He just shook his head at me. I’m not going to get a response from him, I lie back on the mattress, dejected. Suddenly, without speaking, I hear a soft voice.

“You took care of me, I’ll take care of you. It works both ways. You picked me up and put me back together after what happened so I’m going to do the same to you, quite literally if I have to.”

I immediately froze up. I recognised that voice. I hadn’t heard it in over a year but it still rang familiar in my mind. He obviously sensed my surprise so he responded before I could say anything.

“You’re surprised, aren’t you? Because I’m talking, right? There are some things that just shouldn’t be written and need to be said out loud. You don’t have to do anything, Takuya. I’ll do everything. Not because I have to, because I want to. Just sleep now. I’ll still be here when you wake up.” My eyes fluttered closed at Wonho’s request. I hoped that when I woke up that it wouldn’t turn out to be a dream.

Luckily it didn’t.