I opened my eyes to look out the window, it had visibly gotten darker – I’ll assume it’s about 8:00pm now. I was on the ground in a sleep-like position, just laying there, I’d stopped crying awhile ago, I think I’d fallen into a very light sleep, you know, that state where you can’t tell how long you’ve been there, but you know it’s been awhile? Yeah that. I slowly pushed myself up, way too tired to move fast at this point.

I listened closely for any noise outside, straining my head to the left to try and get a better signal; I heard the sound of car engines and crashes in the distance, often broken up by laughing and small ‘whoops’. Ahh, that new video game.

I got up fully and walked over to the door, opened it half way and slipped into the hallway. I poked my head around the corner to check out the seating arrangement. Minho was on the ground a little to the left of Jonghyun’s feet, Jjong was sitting up on the love-seat couch, sort of in the middle, Jinki was sitting in the lazy boy reading a magazine, closest to where I was standing and across from him, on the other side of the room was Taemin, laying belly down on the other couch, playing against Minho in the racing game. I sighed; I guess I’ll just have to sit on the floor..?

“Oh, hey Kibum how was your nap?” Jinki said looking up for a brief second, then back down at his page. I see, so the story is I took a nap. Got it.

“Oh fine.”

“Umma, are you okay? Your eyes are red, and you look a little pale.” Taemin said, looking at me from across the room, Minho turned his head as well. Jjong kept his eyes on the paused game, but I think I saw him glance over at me.

“Oh yeah fine, it’s because I just woke up I guess.” I nodded and moved in front of the TV, trying to pick my spot. Taemin looked comfy, so I won’t ask him to move… and I have a feeling I’d get hit in the head if I sat next to Minho, so… that leaves…

I looked at Jjong but only briefly, I saw he was looking at me, without a change of expression, he lightly tap his right hand on the spot next to him, it was very light, so if you weren’t looking at him, you probably wouldn’t notice. I half swallowed, and nodded once; making a b-line to the couch in front of me, as soon as I moved, the game resumed, and the air became light again.

I sat there next to him stiffly; I kept my feet on the ground and my back straight, looking at the TV without actually seeing it. I was consecrating on my peripheral vision, Jjong was leaning against the arm rest, but kept his body facing the TV, but also laying on his side, his feet were tucked in to make room for me, but his hand was resting by his feet, the other holding his head up. I couldn’t really see his face, so I didn’t know which way his eyes were pointing.

His hand suddenly, but slowly, turn over so it was palm up, asking to be held, I was about to move my hand into it, but I sat on my hands instead, I didn’t trust it, or myself. I let a small sigh.

“Umma, are you hungry? Err; you didn’t really eat dinner…”  He trailed off, leaving the question hanging.

“Yeah I guess I should eat.” I was going to use this as an excuse to get up, but then Minho opened his big mouth.

“No Hyung, it’s okay, Taemin and I will go make some popcorn, or something.” Minho sat up and reached for Taemin’s hand. Taemin grabbed his hand, pulling him the rest of the way up and walked over towards the kitchen.

“I don’t want to read this anymore.” Jinki said suddenly, and walked into the kitchen after the other two. There was a steady buzz of quiet talking in the other room, and an occasional cupboard door opening and closing, keeping the volume a steady comfortable tone. I sighed again, I felt suddenly better about before. And a little daring – if you can call it that.

Jjong’s hand was still flipped up, so, I tucked my knees into my chest, and ever so slightly moved my hand close to his. I didn’t notice until now, that he’d been staring at me for awhile. The eyes I had felt before where his. Oh. I leaned my head onto my knees and looked the other way, out the window to my left. I felt a toe nudge me in the ankle. I flipped my head over to looks at him, he was only glancing at me now, keeping his head towards the paused TV, but his eyes were on me. I didn’t know what he wanted so, I slightly moved my hand close to his, unsure if I wanted to hold it or not.

I’d never felt this way before about holding Jjong’s hand, it’s something I did so often that I didn’t even notice half the time, but I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders at that moment. He moved his hand, like a general reflex of it staying still for too long. Our fingertips brushed lightly, the little shock I felt from that, was actually not so little, it felt strong, and comforting. It felt nice. It was like a sip of water after being out in the sun for too long. It was like home. Somewhere I didn’t feel anymore, unless I was in his arms.

I didn’t care anymore; I took the chance and grabbed his hand, holding it firmly in mine. He tensed for a second, but didn’t try to pull his hand away. It was warm, and soft. A feeling I thought I’d never feel again.

He pulled on my hand then, pulling me over into his side, letting go of my hand to put his arm over my shoulder, I was now laying on his chest, and I’d never felt more at home. He pressed his lips to my hair.

“I missed you yeobo.” The way he said ‘yeobo’ this time, made me smile, I missed him too.

“I’ve missed you too.” I said looking up at him, his eyes said that he was sorry, and I tried to signal the same back. When his lips pealed up at the sides, I knew he’d gotten the message.

He tilted my chin up a bit more towards him, and kissed me again. This time, I noted how long it was. It wasn’t a forever-long kiss, but it wasn’t a peck either. It was soft and tender, he pushed his lips onto mine, but not with much force, it’s like they just fit together. It was warm… and it made me want to melt, I just sat there in happy-bliss for the next few seconds, he pulled back and looked into my eyes. I smiled for him, letting him know that I wanted it this way.

“Saranghae Kibum.” He whispered, leaning in until our lips were brushing as he spoke, but not quite a kiss yet.

“I love you too, forever.” I said to him, in English, but the way his lips met mine again; let me know that was nothing lost in translation. I rested my head back against his chest, closing my eyes.

I heard Taemin and the others walk back into the room. I heard Jinki mutter something like ‘finally’ but I wasn’t sure. Taemin giggled and put the popcorn down next to where Minho went to sit. I looked down and Minho and he mouthed up to me; ‘congrats’ I smiled and nodded to him lightly. Taemin giggle again.

“You are all making it obvious.” Jjongie huffed out swinging his hand down to get some popcorn.

“Jjongie, keep your mouth shut.” I mumbled and nuzzled my head into his chest even further, closing my eyes again, slipping into a comfy drowsy state. Ahh, he’s warm.

i believe i've cought all the mistakes, but if you see anymore please let me know, okay?