Yongguk's senses came to again when he was standing in front of his door. His body was heavy, he was holding onto something. His keys jingled, but they weren't in his hand. He slid towards his bed, thrown down, shoes off. There was a shuffling around him, a heavy sigh and then silence. His eyes opened, in front of him knelt a figure, checking Yogguk's temperature. The figure stood up, dusted his pants and started walking towards the door. Yongguk grabbed the figures coat.

"Daehyun... don't leave"

"I'm not your babysitter" 

The body brushed Yongguk's hand away, his knuckles smacked the floor. The figure dropped the keys on Yongguk's coffee table and left. Yngguk didn't sleep, he hazed in and out of consciousness. Staring at the ceiling, he mumbled to himself. He counted all his partners, but ran out of fingers. He reached for his phone. His arms were heavy but he knew what he wanted. His fingers scrolled to a number how needy he thought as he put the phone to his ear. His breaths were heavy. 

"Hello" the voice was quiet, heavy, rasping. Yongguk recognized it straight away. He's sleeping with someone else. "Hello? What do you want?" a quiet moan in the background sobered Yongguk up his girlfriend?.

"Sh-Sh, be quiet. Hey, what do you want? Didn't you tell me we were finished..." Yongguk couldn't answer. He realized who he was talking to and hung up. He clung to his phone, held it close to his chest. For a moment he felt as if he couldn't breathe. He had plenty more numbers but he only wanted to call Daehyun. The room was silent and then his phone vibrated against him. 

"Why did you call. You interrupted me and ruined it"

"I can't breathe. I ca-"

"What! Are you okay?"

"I - - just - - can't - - breathe"

Yongguk held his phone close to him again. His breaths were labored. His eyes shut. 

* * * * * *

A panicked knocking rattled Yongguk's door. His eyelid were heavy as they were forced open. The night was still dark, Yongguk checked his clock 3.00am??? He stood up, his footing was still unsteady and he was still dizzy. Yongguk's breathing was still heavy and he made his way to the door. The knocking was persistent. He pushed open a door and a hand pushed him onto the floor. The door was closed by the visitor, Yongguk adjusted his eyes to the figure standing in the darkness. He pretended to figure him out but he already knew. 

Yongguk's body began sweating as the figure knelt in front of him. His movements were slow. The stranger didn't move, he was quiet, he stared at Yongguk. Yongguk's body moved without him thinking, grabbed the hair of the stranger and brought him forward. Their lips crashed, Yongguk's kiss was sloppy, he could tell, he couldn't control himself. The stranger pushed his way on top of Yongguk but Yongguk felt a force and strength in him as he pushed the body down and sat on top of him. Their lips parted, Yongguk sat up. 

For a moment they were still. 

Yongguk slowly moved towards the stranger, to kiss again. The stranger covered Yongguk's mouth, there were no words as the strangers hand moved into Yongguk's boxers. Yongguk shivered, but he stayed quiet. His body shook and sweat as the hand adjusted it's pace. Yongguk came. Their breathing was heavy as Yongguk felt the figures press against him. He smacked the hand away. His movements were aggressive as he pulled down the figures trousers and then his boxers. 

First his lips, then his hand relieved the stranger. The starnger's hand traced Yongguk's body, Yongguk's eyes watered. He got off the stranger and flipped him onto his stomach. The stranger almost called out but Yongguk sat on top of him. He pushed grabbed his hair and pushed his face towards the floor. Yongguk didn't prepare him. He ed himself inside with all the hurt he'd pent up. He tightened his grip on figure's hair and pulled his head back. A whisper.

"I've always wanted to hurt you... Daehyun" Yongguk slammed Daehyun's head against the flooring and continued. 
 

* * * * * *

Yongguk awoke in his bed . His room spun as he sat up and rubbed his head. His clothes were scattered amongst the floor, a scratch against the flooring. Yongguk walked towards it, dried blood and scratches filled the space. I hope I didn't hurt Daehyun. I didn't hurt him, did I? Yongguk contemplated his actions but also contemplated how light he felt. He wasn't dizzy, heavy nor was breathing complicated. Yongguk felt neutral.

He checked his clock. 12pm... I have to see him soon. Yongguk began getting ready to attend university, his movements were fast. He wanted to see him, he wanted to see Daehyun. He wanted to apologize and yet, he also wanted to assert himself. He checked his face in his mirror, the bruising was still there but it was faint, the swelling had gone down. Yongguk wanted to see Daehyun but he also didn't ever want to speak to him again. Yongguk was confused, he got his things together and left his home. He look around as he stood outside, he didn't see his lecturer Kim Himchan. I wonder if he'll be late... Yongguk checked his watch before beginning his walk to university. 

 * * * * * *

Yongguk walked into his lecture theatre, students interacted as they waited for Kim Himchan. Yongguk scanned the room, he spotted Daehyun, at the back with a couple of friends. He sent a text.

"Could you come outside please?"

Yongguk peeked. He saw Daehyun looking for his phone, checking his message and getting up. He quickly said something to one of his friends. As he walked down the steps, he touched the shoulder of a short haired girl. Her hair was and sleek orange brown and curled towards her jaw. She smiled as she held his hand and then let go. Yongguk stepped back into the hall his girlfriend? 

Yongguk waited a few seconds more and then Daehyun stepped outside the door, he closed it behind him. Yongguk checked his watch it's 2, the lecture should've started. Daehyun rested against the wall in front of Yongguk. 

"What is it?" 

"I'm feeling better, I think I just drank too much" 

"I see, why did you-"

"Thank you for coming over! Daehyun, I don't know what I-"

"What are you talking about? Me? Come over?" Daehyun chuckled "Are you so in love that you imagine me ing you while other guys do?" He Yongguk's lips. Yongguk smacked his hand away, Daehyun was shocked but didn't retaliate.

"What are you talking about?! It was you! You were there!" as if Daehyun would let me do that to him...

"Are you crazy?! You imagined it.... Look, you're the one who ended it. Why would you call me?" Yongguk hesitated.

"I wanted you, I really wanted you" Daehyun chuckled, it was smug. He stepped towards Yongguk. Yongguk shivered as he looked him in the eye. His voice was sinister.

"As if I would go back to public entertainment, like you" Daehyun grabbed Yongguk's throat "You're disgusting" Daehyun pushed Yongguk back and walked into the classroom. Yongguk sputtered and coughed. He cleared his throat, his body shook. 

He was frightened as he followed behind Daehyun into the lecture hall. His eyes moved straight towards him, he kissed the orange haired girl's forehead before making his way to his friends. Her friends quietly squealed and envied her. His smile was directed at his friends but his arrogant stare was directed at Yongguk as he sat down. Yongguk averted his eyes, he scanned the room for a seat. As he was walking, he heard Kim Himchan call to everyone from behind him.

"Alright everyone, settle down. We have work to do" the sound of books slamming down hit Yongguk's ears as he sat in a seat close to the window. He heard a whisper behind him.

"Hey, look... what do you think happened to him?"

"I don't know. Hope he's okay. His face is too beautiful for a bandage"

Yongguk set his books down and looked up, his eyes were immediately drawn to a fresh white bandage on the right side of Kim Himchan's forehead.

Kim Himchan eyes locked with Yongguk's.