Kyungsoo wakes up to a sense of loss.

In his dream, he was in the university dining hall. He sat by Baekhyun, who was up to his usual theatrical antics. They were surrounded by a throng of other students, faceless students that he felt sure he knew. He sat quietly, but he was certain that he was smiling.

In his dream, he felt a sense of elation, as if a burden has been lifted. His dream self had escaped the nightmarish reality of his present existence and had found a happier place. Times were simpler: he laughed, he had friends, he knew his place…he had a place.

He’s awakened by the insistent beeping of his alarm. Reality registers bit by bit—white walls, white sheets. A sterile room lacking in Baekhyun’s soft snores and his interminable messes. What he would’ve given back then for this privacy, this sanctuary of his own.

What wouldn’t he give now to turn back time and escape his gilded cage?

But there is no escape, no means of turning back time. The only way is forward, to trudge on into the endless dark tunnel, adrift, alone, lost.

Kyungsoo lays immobile for several minutes, staring into the ceiling. What if he pulled the covers over his face and just suffocated to death? How long would it take before someone realizes? Can he return to his dream on the way to death?

His alarm beeps again. He gets up silently and prepares for work.

The so-called café has the feel of a jazz club. The lights are turned low, the stage is intimate, and the patrons sit at cushioned booths, chatting quietly amongst themselves.  Relief washes over Kyungsoo. Compared to the noisy clubs that dot the area, the place is much less intimidating than he had imagined.

He guides Krystal to an obscure booth in the corner. When the server brings them their drinks, he cracks a smile at Krystal’s pink concoction. She rolls her eyes.

“I like it fruity, okay? Got a problem with that?”

“Nope,” he says with a chuckle.

Krystal suppresses a smile of her own. “So, who are we here for?”

“My neighbor. Performance starts in just a bit, I think?”

Krystal nods absently and scans the joint. “Didn’t know you came to places like this. It’s pretty cute though. I like it.”

“My first time, actually. I don’t usually—er, I’m not big on going out, I guess.”

“Huh. Me neither, I guess.” Krystal takes a sip of her cocktail before she catches Kyungsoo’s look of obvious surprise. “What?”

“No-nothing. I just thought—”

“—You thought I was a hardcore party girl?”

“Er…”

“It’s okay. It’s what everyone thinks. Works to my advantage.”

But Kyungsoo notes that her nonchalance feels forced.

Just then, a round of applause sounds out. Kyungsoo looks up and sees Chanyeol walking onto the small stage. Following him is the three other young men who form his band. Kyungsoo’s eyes widen in surprise when he catches a good look of the last member who walks out. He recognizes him.

Jongdae…

“What’s wrong?” asks Krystal.

Kyungsoo shakes his head and turns back to Chanyeol. He meets the other boy’s eyes; they appear to be seeking his. When their eyes meet, Chanyeol cracks a big smile and strums the first notes to an R&B tune.

Kyungsoo is unwittingly captivated.

The band finishes their act to rigorous applause from its adoring audience, Chanyeol & Co slide into Kyungsoo’s small booth. Kyungsoo hurriedly introduces himself and Krystal, who flashes a pretty smile, though it doesn’t seem to have the intended effect. Chanyeol studies her quietly for half a beat before he, in turn, introduces himself and his band mates.

Oh Sehun, bass. Kang Minhyuk, drums. Kim Jongdae, vocalist.

“Long time no see, Soo.”

Jongdae hasn’t changed in the two years since graduation: not his crinkling, knowing eyes, not his easy Cheshire grin. Half of Kyungsoo feels guilty towards Jongdae, the other half feels palpable joy at seeing him again so serendipitously.

“Soo?” Chanyeol asks, suspicious.

Jongdae, who had managed to squeeze in next to Kyungsoo, swings an arm around Kyungsoo’s stiff shoulders and grins. “Yup! We go way back, don’t we?”

Kyungsoo quietly shrugs off Jongdae’s arms and makes a struggle to inch away. “Just college,” he says dismissively, though he can’t quite fight off a smile.

“Yeah. Met this one in vocal classes, believe it or not. Our little lawyer here has quite the voice.”

Chanyeol’s brows shoot up in surprise. “You sing?”

“Not really,” Kyungsoo says with a shrug. “Just a hobby.”

“Not really, he says,” Jongdae repeats mockingly. “Don’t listen to him. He’s almost as good as me. Pity he went for the whole law thing instead.”

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes and punches Jongdae lightly in the arm. Chanyeol observes their intimacies with wide eyes before voicing, tentatively, “I’d love to hear you sing some time, Kyungsoo.”

“…Yeah, sure. Some time,” Kyungsoo acquiesces vaguely.

The evening passes amiably. Jongdae and Sehun crack jokes at Chanyeol’s expense. Chanyeol grumbles at them like a wounded puppy. Krystal laughs along, looking more comfortable than Kyungsoo’s seen her in awhile. Minhyuk smiles gently and adds a reconciliatory word here and there. Under the light buzz from his glass of wine, Kyungsoo begins to relax. He likes this group, he thinks.

The hour grows late. Sehun makes a suggestion for their next step: “Karaoke, anyone?”

“Yeah, let’s go!”

“But hyung,” Sehun admonishes Jongdae with a serious face, “you can’t hog the mic this time. We have to at least let Kyungsoo hyung sing for us.”

Kyungsoo blinks in surprise. “Eh?”

“It’s no use,” Krystal laments. “This one doesn’t sing in public. I’d know—I’ve tried so many times to drag him to company outings and it’s always a no-go.”

“Really?” asks Jongdae, “You don’t sing anymore? But you were so good! Do you remember when you, me and Baekhyun used to perform at school festivals? We were pretty popular!”

Kyungsoo smiles stiffly. “Well, that was awhile ago…”

“But Kyungsoo hyung, it’ll be fun! You don’t have to be good or anything,” Sehun implores, clearly keen on the idea of karaoke. “Ya, Park Chanyeol, talk him into it!”

Chanyeol cuffs Sehun lightly on the head. “I’m your hyung too, you brat! Respect your elders. Anyway, I can’t go. Told Grandma I’d get home early and I don’t want her to worry. Kyungsoo, you can come with me if you want.”

“Oh, yeah. I-yes.” Kyungsoo smiles gratefully at Chanyeol, who grins back.

The rest of the party moan and groan but eventually let them go. As the group parts ways, Jongdae gives Kyungsoo a firm pat on his shoulders. “Ya, Do Kyungsoo, keep in touch, okay?”

Kyungsoo nods, but Jongdae surprises him by adding: “I know you think Baekhyun’s your only friend or something, but hey, I always considered you to be a pretty good friend too, you know.

“Oh, don’t make that face at me. All I’m saying is, I wish you weren’t so closed off. But I guess that’s just how you are.” Jongdae looks a bit wistful as he says this. “But I’m glad I ran into you again. Let’s hang out some time.”

“…Yes, I”d like that.”

“Sorry I prevented you from going to karaoke.”

The road to their building has mostly emptied. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol walk quietly side by side as the cool summer night breeze ruffles playfully at their shirttails.

“Huh? No, I actually did promise Grandma I’d get home. She worries, you know.”

“Must be nice, having family in the city.”

“Yeah. Well, they’re all I’ve got.”

Kyungsoo stares up at Chanyeol, who doesn’t meet his eyes. He wants to ask more, but stops himself. He settles for a quiet, “Oh.”

“I—I used to party a lot, you know. When we first moved here, I’d go out and get drunk and come home really late in a complete mess, if I came home at all. It made me feel better. I guess I wasn’t really in a good place then. But I realized how much of a toll it took on Grandma and Yura, so…I guess you could say I’ve reformed? Anyway,” Chanyeol says with a bemused smile, “I’m model child now. Home before midnight, and all that.”

Kyungsoo smiles along, but he wonders what Chanyeol was like before, and what caused it. He seems so cheerful now, so comfortable with life, that it’s hard to imagine him in any other iteration.

Maybe he’ll ask about it one day, after they’ve gotten to know each other better. There’s something exciting about that thought.

As they near the apartment, Kyungsoo remarks, “Thanks for inviting me tonight. I had a good time. I liked your friends.”

“Yeah? That’s good! Well, I guess Jongdae’s your friend too.”

Kyungsoo chuckles. “Yes, that’s true. Small world. But Sehun and Minhyuk are nice.”

“Yeah. They were my first true friends in Seoul. I’m glad you like them. Oh, and Krystal seems nice too.” Chanyeol pauses, here, as if hesitating. Then, “So…you and Krystal, huh?”

Kyungsoo’s eyes widen at the implication. “What? Oh no. We’re not—no, we’re just colleagues. Strictly work. I mean, kind of friends. But that’s it. I just thought I’d invite her tonight, since she was free and…anyway, yeah, just friends.”

“Oh. Oh, that’s…that’s good.”

Kyungsoo registers Chanyeol’s relief, and this too surprises him. His heart rate speeds up just a bit as he begins to wonder about this. There’s something about human nature that can read hope into the smallest gestures, and the hope might make us giddy. But Kyungsoo doesn’t ask. Not yet. Not when they’ve only known each other for a week.

He’s timid like that.

“Well, good night,” he says when they reach the base of the stairs.

“…Good night. Thanks for coming.”

Kyungsoo smiles and walks up the stairs. At the top, he turns and looks down. Chanyeol stands there still, a lone figure in the dark. Kyungsoo can’t see his face, but he thinks that Chanyeol must be smiling; the thought makes him happy.

***TBC***

Thanks everyone for reading!!! :)