Having a psychologist mother, who would spew Freudian theories or Pavlovian concepts on her daily ramblings, Minhee knew the stages of emotional processing she would go through.

Shock, denial, anger, bargaining then maybe, just maybe acceptance.

It was on her third day of shock that she decided to get off the couch that she’s been cocooning herself into.

Therapy, that's what her mom would tell her.
Get up and do something therapeutic for yourself. Get your mind off it and channel the energy into something productive.

But instead of retail, music or food therapy, she spent the entire day cleaning the entire apartment and hand washing her entire laundry. She changed her bed covers, vacuumed and mopped every floor inch and color-coded the contents of her refrigerator. Spending nearly nine straight hours cleaning, Minhee could only sprawl bonelessly on her now sparkly clean living room.

“If only my mom could see me now. She would be truly proud,” she mused, thinking how incredulous her mom would be. She could only imagine the look on her mom’s face seeing how clean her eldest daughter’s place. "Or she'd think there's something wrong with me." 

Deep belly laughs erupted from her and for the time being she could almost lie to herself that she was fine. She was literally rolling around the floor, wheezing from too much laughter.

There's nothing wrong with me. I’m okay. I’m okay. I’m fine.

She was still rolling around when she saw a pair of men’s socks. Luhan's socks left under the sofa in his rush. Seeing those pair, innocently squashed under the couch triggered tears that she could barely stop. 

I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not fine.

She was physically and mentally drained, unsure and unable to be okay. 

“ing stupid tears! ing stupid socks! ING STUPID LUHAN!"

She knew she was being irrational and stupid. They were just friends. Sure, lifelong childhood friends, but friends all the same. Her rational side kept screaming for her to stop being unreasonable, stop blaming Luhan.

She always lauded herself for being analytic and logical; mind over heart, facts over feelings she would always say. And facts and her brain kept telling her that she has no one to blame but herself. But that did not stop the loneliness creeping over her as her tears lulled her to sleep.  

It was the sound of eggs whisking that jolted her awake the next day. Minhee was expecting to wake up on the tiled floors of her apartment but instead, she was on her couch with a neck crick from sleeping curled up and her entire apartment smelling like pancakes. Trudging her way to the kitchen, she saw a poker-faced Kyungsoo and a smiling Chanyeol ransacking her kitchen.

“Morning,” Chanyeol chirped, looking way too happy for a Sunday morning. Kyungsoo gave her a smile and a nod while he continued whisking.

“Morning,” Minhee mumbled before plopping on her seat and shoving a mouthful of pancakes. “How did you guys get inside?”

Chanyeol could only look at Kyungsoo in panic, his large eyes growing impossibly larger, before spouting a mouthful of gibberish.

“It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it? The birds, the bees, the flowers, the trees. What do you want to do today?.”

Chanyeol was speaking so fast, tripping over his words that spittle was practically flying out of .

"What do you want to do today Minhee? There's a new stationary place that opened in Mapo-gu. Or we could get that new graphing calculator you wanted, I'll even drive you." 

Minhee blankly stared at Chanyeol’s grinning face, wiping stray droplets that landed on the kitchen table and Kyungsoo shook his head at Chanyeol’s attempt of distraction.

“Actually Luhan hyung wanted us to give you this,” Kyungsoo told her before taking a key attached to a football keychain from his pocket.

She managed to swallow the lump in before nodding in understanding. “Oh okay.”

Chanyeol’s wide-eyed gaze drifted back and forth from Minhee’s clenched fists to her face, as if trying to see if she would breakdown and start crying any minute now.

“I’m okay,” she smiled at the obviously worried Chanyeol.

“Minhee –“

“Trust me I’m fine. It’s not like we two broke up or anything. We’re fine. We’re best friends. He’ll call any day now,” she rambled. Trying not to answer anymore, she quickly shoved another mouthful of pancakes. “Mmmhmm. This is really good Kyungsoo-ah.”

He could only smile at Minhee before pushing another plateful of freshly cooked pancakes and smacking Chanyeol as he passed by him.

"Get the syrup and chocolate. They're in the fridge."

Minhee could only smile in thanks. "He's older than you, you know and way taller. Why are you not scared of him?"

“I am. Scared of him I mean especially when he gets angry. But he's worried about you as I am."

"I'm sor-" 

"Don't be sorry," Chanyeol interrupted before pouring a deliberate amount of syrup atop her stack of pancakes. "None of it is your fault. Nobody's at fault so you don't have to be sorry." 

She never knew she needed to hear those words until Chanyeol reassured her. She had been so scared that her falling out with Luhan would change the previous easy going relationship of her friend group but Chanyeol's reassurance was more than enough.

"And besides I'm sticking with you since you have this apartment, you got the better end of the deal. You got the house in your divor-"

Chanyeol never finished his sentence since Kyungsoo whacked him with the spatula causing the older one t sputter in indignation.   

She could only laugh under her breath while watching Chanyeol try to scold Kyungsoo, who was obviously not paying attention, thus annoying the other.

It’s okay. It’s okay. You’re not alone. Who needs a Luhan when you have a Chanyeol and Kyungsoo.