The moment Mark left the claustrophobic confines of the examination room, it was as if a heavy weight had been lifted off from his shoulders. He felt lighter. But also quite light-headed. It was as if he’d been holding his breath throughout the whole exam, cutting off the supply of oxygen without even realizing it. And now when the access to his pipes were finally released again, it almost felt like the world was spinning due to the sudden inflow of air. To his side, Youngjae sighed audibly “Not my best, I feel like I messed this one up really bad.” The younger pouted with the ends of his mouth turning downwards dejectedly. Mark gave him the look to which Youngjae insisted “No, for real!”

The older didn’t feel inclined to believe in the younger given past history. More specifically, Youngjae always claimed he did badly after finishing every exam, but yet somehow he still ended up topping the class. As per usual, Mark reassured his friend that no worries he would do just fine, he always did and that this time would be no different. The older put an arm around the younger, and squeezed his shoulder gently in a consoling manner. After having calmed down, Youngjae asked Mark how he thought it went for him. The latter shrugged, and clicked his tongue “I honestly don’t know”. Overall he felt he’d done okay, but there was a nagging feeling in the back of his head. “There’s really no use thinking about it though, what’s done is done” he concluded, to which Youngjae nodded dispiritedly. In order to lighten up the mood, the older humorously sang “I got 99 problems but exams ain’t one! Cheers for that!” he howled, which earned him a genuine smile from the younger.

It was already close to 19 o’clock by the time Mark had picked out his fourth outfit. He’d never admit it to anyone, but perhaps for the very first time ever, Mark was experiencing a serious clothing crisis. “What about this?” He pulled out a light blue dress shirt and placed it in front of his body for Youngjae to evaluate. “Too formal?” The other had already picked out his outfit ages ago, and was now seated comfortably on the end of Mark’s bed. He played the role as judge for reasons he didn’t know because to be perfectly honest, Youngjae couldn’t coordinate colors and patterns for . But neither could he bring himself to tell the older, namely because the sight of a hopeless Mark gave him life. “Hm yeah I guess it might be? I don’t know though, it really depends… What do you think Jackson’s going to wear?” To this, Mark’s eyes widened slightly because of course. Obviously, Jackson and his friends wouldn’t dress like how he’d gotten used to dressing up for college parties in the business department; with hair slicked to the side and a neat button-up. Casual was the keyword, Mark was sure. The older remembered clearly that Jackson had worn nothing but a t-shirt and some ridiculously baggy pants on that night, and whilst the latter article of clothing might not exactly be his choice of wardrobe, Mark could think of something that went along with it. He hugged Youngjae tightly “Thanks Youngjae, you’re my hero”. The younger smiled at that but then jokingly told Mark to stop strangling him. Stubbornly, Mark only held him even tighter.

Mark had been a tiny bit nervous when he was still at home preparing for the party, but now when he was actually standing right outside the apartment door at Jackson’s, his nerves were on overdrive. He didn’t have time to nurse them any further though, when the door threw open and a tall guy gestured for Mark and Youngjae to come in, the faint sound of a pounding bass travelling from somewhere in the spacy apartment. Before he’d even had time to look around let alone greet anyone, he heard his name being called by a familiar voice, followed by an even more familiar body assaulting him in a crushing embrace. “Maaark!” Jackson sing-songed before releasing his arms and taking a step back to look at him, the latter momentarily stunned into silence. The former literally drank in the sight of the older, from his flipped-back cap to his hoodie and a white tank top underneath that exposed a wide expanse of his collarbones, down to his loosely fit black pants which hugged his thighs neatly. Mark lowered his gaze, finding the intense stare too overwhelming, although the attention was definitely not unwanted. On the contrary, Mark found it strangely gratifying.
Jackson broke into his usual, boyish smile “You look good” he complimented, before sliding an arm over Mark’s shoulder and introducing him and a shy Youngjae to his roommates, who had started to gather around at the entrance to greet the guests.

Mark learned that the tall boy who had opened the door for them was Yugyeom, the youngest guy out of the bunch, even though Mark was convinced otherwise. To his right was a baby-faced, slightly tanned Kunpimook Bhuwakul who greeted them enthusiastically after which he told them just to call him Bambam, to both Youngjae and Mark’s gratitude. From what Mark picked up from their short exchange of words, Bambam came from Thailand and travelled to Seoul to become a trainee at a well-known entertainment agency along with Yugyeom, the latter having moved from the countryside. Finally, a third, fair-skinned guy with black hair framed around his slim face introduced himself as Jinyoung, or Jr. for short, as he shook Mark’s hand with a gentle squeeze, smile lines creasing around his eyes as they crinkled mirthfully into half-moon crescents. Pretty, Mark thought to himself offhandedly.
“Uh thanks? You’re pretty cute, too” He smiled grew even wider, to which Mark blushed furiously because did he just say that out loud? He decided to just laugh it off awkwardly, ­not noticing how the grip on his shoulder contracted imperceptibly. Jackson impatiently urged them all to move to the living room, which they did, taking their seats on the couch and the wooden floor.

Before long, cans of beer and drinks were handed out, and soon enough the room buzzed with life and chatter. Jaebum joined their company shortly after Youngjae and Mark had settled in, bringing with him another six pack of booze. Jackson jokingly told Yugyeom and Bambam to lay off the alcohol seeing as they were still under the legal drinking age. “Hyung brought you some juice” he grinned playfully, placing two glasses on the table with a loud clink, the contents of which were definitely not just pure juice if the conspiring looks shared between the three were anything to go by. And the way Bambam and Yugyeom hugged the life out of Jackson to express their gratitude did nothing to dampen Mark’s suspicions.

“What did this reliable hyung bring for me?” Mark asked teasingly, palm stretched out as if in anticipation
“I brought myself, express delivery” Jackson winked at Mark and wittingly added “Jackson Wang at your service”, which made the latter cringe visibly because the greasiness was simply too much to handle. While he was busy laughing, Jaebum handed Mark a can of cold beer that he’d gotten when he was fetching some of his own, throwing himself down on the seat beside the older. Mark suddenly found himself sandwiched between the two J’s, which he didn’t mind all too much except he was kind of just extremely hyper aware of where the length of his thighs was now pressed against Jackson’s, the warmth of the former noticeable even through the thick fabric of his clothes. Mark felt a telling heat rise to his cheeks which he stubbornly identified as nothing but an Asian flush, never mind the fact that they had just started drinking.

Fact was that Mark wasn’t that much of a drinker but seeing as how things progressed, this piece of information was outright dismissed as he found himself thrown into various drinking games. For some reason, the seemingly objective game they were playing quickly translated into a how to get Mark and Jackson faced, as the others came up with ridiculously elaborate confessions such as “never have I ever called a stranger while drunk and asked him to pick me up” and “never have I ever received a drunken call in the morning from a stranger after which I decided to willingly pick said stranger up”, which not only served to make the intended victims of the game drink up, but also made it very clear for Mark that their little episode was already a not-so-secret, widespread story. I