The Assignment - Part One

Here To Spy
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Thick hands clamped down on my mouth, briefly suffocating me. I opened my eyes, shocked out of slumber, automatically scanning my surroundings. My room is bathed in shadow, the darkness only broken by a single shaft of moonlight spilling through my shattered window. My curtains rustled and shards of glass glittered from where they littered my maroon carpet. I cringed. That’s going to make it hard to fight freely. How did I not wake up when the intruder broke the window? I refocused my attention on the figure hovering above me--a man based on size and weight. I pushed against his chest with my arms, forcing him to stumble back. A smirk stole across my lips. What a weakling. He can’t even hold off a teenage girl. Though I do work out everyday; guess it paid off.

           I slipped out of bed while he was regaining his balance, settling into a defensive stance, wincing when I accidentally stepped on a piece of broken glass. The trespasser noticed my movement and threw a punch at my stomach. I dodged to the right, kicking at his temple as I moved, hoping to take advantage of his momentary loss of balance but he grabbed my leg and twisted it, slamming me to the ground. I fell with a thud, the palms of my hands impaling themselves on glass. My mind raced. How did he anticipate that attack? Does he know my style?. I grimaced when my hand stung. At least the carpet is red. Mom won’t see the blood. I considered screaming for help, but my pride refused. Instead I struggled to my feet, only to be pinned down by the intruder, his hands on my arms as his knees caged my legs. A waft of something minty hit my nose. Huh. Why do I feel like I should know who this is?

           “You’re an idiot. I thought you could’ve done better than that Leah,” the intruder teased, his voice dripping with condescension. Realization crashed over me, quickly followed by a rush of relief.

           “Seth?”

           “Nope!” he snarked back. “I’m Chen from EXO. Feel free to begin fangirling.” I frowned at the reply, sensing a hint of exasperation and jealousy in his tone.

           “Get off me, Seth.” The tips of his eyelashes tickled my cheek. Why are these long eyelashes wasted on a guy? Envy stung my mind, reminding me of my own short lashes. Long story short, don’t leave your four year old with scissors when they just had a haircut. They might be inspired to try it themselves. Needless to say, my mother was furious, but hey, I didn’t know what I was doing!

           “Fine,” he rolled onto his side, huffing indignantly, “but I could’ve killed you in your sleep Leah. I can’t believe you didn’t wake up when I broke through the window. You need to be more careful.” Seth’s teeth glinted in the moonlight as he stood, pulling me up with him. I glanced at my alarm clock: 1:47 am.

           “I think I fell asleep on my books an hour ago,” I yawned. “I have a history final… oww,” I whined, stepping on another piece of glass. “Why couldn’t you have used the door like a normal person?”

           “You know that your parents are watching a movie in the living room, right? They would’ve caught me.”

           “Does it matter? They never care when you come over. And besides, how am I going to explain that to my parents?” I gestured towards the mess of shattered glass on the carpet. Seth followed my gaze, wincing at the sharp crystals littering the ground before guiltily looking at my hands and feet. I didn’t stop. “And what are you doing here? What’s going on? It’s insane to break into someone’s room this late!”

           “I’m sorry Leah,” Seth’s eyes met mine, his expression weighted down with concern and guilt. “Really! Do you want me to fix up your hands for you?”

           I sighed before nodding..

    Seth inched forward like I would attack him. Quietly I held out my hands and let him dab antiseptic on the cuts, hissing when they stung. “Really Leah,” he whispered, carefully placing bandaids over my deepest cuts. “I’m sorry.”

           “It’s all right.” I the lights and started to clean up the mess. Looking cowed, Seth grabbed my purple trashcan and began throwing glass in it. I turned back to him. “So, why are you here?”

           “Umm, I came over here to tell you about our first assignment from the Director. I got really excited and you wouldn’t pick up your phone.”

          Weird, I had it with me all night. I frowned, leaning over to grab my phone off my desk and hit the home button. The screen stayed dark.

           “I guess it died,” I apologized, suddenly remembering the “10% battery remaining” notification I had gotten earlier that night.

           Seth snorted at me. “Typical. Plug it in. In the mean time we can talk about our new assignment.” He put my trash can back in the corner by my desk and threw himself down on my bed with a grunt, pulling his phone out the pocket of his black hoodie. I mimicked his action, breathing a sigh of relief when my phone screen lit up (at 2% battery).  

           All of a sudden, my bedroom door crashed to the floor, the lock and hinges ripped from the frame. My parents stood in the doorway, both looking ready to slaughter someone. I groaned and buried  my head in my hands. I’m surrounded by crazy people who break things like it’s their job. We just fixed that door too.

          Upon seeing Seth both of my parents relaxed. “What are you doing here? It’s 3AM Seth,” my mother asked.

     My dad flashed a mock frown, “And in my daughter’s room too? That’s highly inappropriate Bud.”

            My parents know Seth and his family really well. Our dads are close friends, so we’ve shared our entire childhood. Every July, our families gather to celebrate the Obon Festival. In the past Seth and I have always donned our yukatas and run around trying to catch goldfish, wreaking general havoc. We’d eat hinomaru bento boxes and Seth would always steal some of my rice. Then we’d sit down together to make our own lanterns (with our parent’s help, of course) and when it got really dark, we’d push our lanterns out onto the pond in my backyard. The lanterns flickered on the ink black water like stars on a clear night. It always stole my breath away, especially when I was younger. Seth and I were terrors together then. We’re still now, but it shows differently now that 10 years have passed. Seth is only a year older, already graduated from high school, and he never fails to use his age against me. It’s like he’s determined to be the annoying older brother I never wanted.

          “Konnichiwa, Mrs. Tsukuda.” Seth bowed. “I came here to speak with Leah; she wouldn’t answer her phone. I’m terribly sorry about the window.” I grinned as I saw my mother finally notice the shattered glass and rustling curtains. Her eyebrows slowly raised and Seth’s face went white. “I’ll pay for the damages.”

          My mom tore her eyes from the carnage, looking back at Seth; a slight breeze whooshed through the hole and tousled his hair. I shivered. It’s freaking cold! A small smile flitted across my mother’s features, wrinkling her eyes and upturning her lips.

          “It’s all right. You don’t have to pay for it,” she laughed a little, shaking her head. “But please, don’t do that again. First off it’s dangerous. That, and it’s highly unconventional. Besides, you aren’t really sneaky enough to pull it off, which can make people think you’re a thief. We’d like to avoid that.”

    My dad stood behind her grinning like a chesire cat at Seth’s obv

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crazyasianlady
IM SO SORRY FOR THE INACTIVITY. :((( some stuff happened. I hope you can understand...

Comments

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ABstylePanda
#1
Chapter 3: I know im a bit late for discovering this, but please update, the story is good. I love the way you write. And im really interested to know what will happened next. Ogad theres still seventeen and i love seth and leah alreadyyy. I ship them together. I hope you finish the storyy. I would definitely recommend it to my friends. But author u need to update pleasseeee. Gad so many scenarios going on in my mind XDDDDD
rocksolidpanda #2
Chapter 1: Okay I am so sorry this has taken me so long. I'm going to a con in like a week and I've been crazy busy getting stuff ready and working extra shifts at my job to have money for it. So here is my quickie, first impressions review of your story. I think you have a lot of potential as an author and I commend you for not only creating two original characters, but for also creating such an elaborate setting and world for them. I will say that 1st person is probably one of the most difficult things to read and write and it shows a bit in this story. I've noticed that many authors tend to trail off in their main characters own stream of thought too often when writing in 1st person because it is so easy to feel as if they are your own thoughts, this creates a lot of unnecessary detail in my opinion and you do that a few times. But fear not! We all have that problem, I'm positive my stories do it even without being in 1st person.
The last criticism I have is to watch out for being too larger-than-life or unrealistic with your characters. It's tempting to make them super impressive and flawless because they're your babies, you made them up and they are a part of you, but it leaves zero room for development and growth within the character. Don't feel bad about giving them flaws or something that they are just average at. This also applies to dialogue, but for the most part you do a good job of making sure to keep the dialogue context appropriate (meaning that the characters speak casually to themselves but to their parents or other authority figures they take on different speech patterns).
I look forward to reading more, seeing what changes you make, and how these characters grow! Happy writing! X3
rainbowkimchi #3
Chapter 2: Hello,Sorry I took so log to review your story,I have not been on a computer (I'm on my tablet) so please excuse my spelling mistakes.First off I think that your story is starting off very nicely,Also I see you are very professional and that's qualities a reader would love to see in an author.Secondly the story has a lot of details and I understand why you put so many details,You want to help your readers understand.Lastly I love that you don't have many spelling/punctuation mistakes (Even though I don't really see any).I wish you success on your story,Good luck!
WenZhen #4
Chapter 2: Hi, sorry this took a while. I'm not used to reading beyond my fandom tbh haha. Generally speaking, your fic is clear and straightforward so that makes it easy to follow. It's a little excessively detailed though I feel, there are many things that don't really need so much explanation or description. Especially since this is written from a first-person point of view, the focus should be on the protagonist and how she feels rather than on a lot of description of what she sees around her, especially if it's not all that necessary. With such a simple setup for the later scenes, I would also expect the story to move along at a much quicker pace so as not to lose readers (especially new readers who want to see how your story develops before deciding whether to commit to subscribing or not). Especially about your characters, since they seem young and somewhat immature going off on a highly dangerous secret mission it's not helpful to pluck them out from a very "normal" setting with a home, and family etc. It's somewhat unnecessary and just gives you trouble when transposing them from a "normal" to an "abnormal" setting when you could have just jumped straight to action and letting the rest of your story fill in the gaps. Overall, your story sounds interesting but you might lose casual readers as they're unsure of who/what they're supposed to be following. Since Seth & Leah aren't real life people that readers can relate to, you'll have to use the story itself and the excitement of the scenes to convince people to stay on and read... which hasn't really been happening too. Don't be discouraged though, I wish you all the best in your writing :)
izzabellazm
#6
Chapter 2: This is a really nice story .. Can't wait for the next story :p
VinnyCakes
#7
Chapter 3: Oh wow! I haven't read a story that sounds this professional on aff in a really long time! I love this story, it sounds like it could be an actual book! lol There isn't anything I would really say to change or add at this point, this is story is really good that I just can't wait for the next update! I'm definitely going to keep up with this story! Good Job! Props to you, this is a really good story line!
KeitMeg
#8
oh hon, as much as I'd love to sub and read, i still can't because you see, i'm not into hetero fics (read: )
however, im wishing you luck! you are already having many subs and upvotes, it's wonderful!
nina147
#9
Chapter 3: This is a very good story and I can't believe you kill my maknae Sehun. Also I think i'm shipping Seth and Leah... too cute!! Overall I'm impressed.
secret-owl #10
Chapter 1: Nice story! ^_^ Your writing is really good, the plot seems interesting, and you're one of the few authors on here who has good grammar and spelling. It's like reading a book. The writing is rich and detailed.