The next morning came quickly, and Suhyun was surprised to find herself actually excited for school. She got dressed, ate breakfast, did everything as she normally did, but this time there was a slight spring to her step. She bid farewell to her parents, knowing that her mother was still asleep and her father was already at work. 

—

    Walking into class, she saw ‘V’ sitting at his desk, his head down, most likely sleeping. She sat down quietly, taking advantage of the fact that he was asleep, and watched as his shoulders rise and fall as he breathed. Her hand itched, wanting to reach out and touch him, but she knew better than to do that. Suhyun simply stared, tracing the outline of his jaw in her mind, memorizing every aspect of his face, like the freckle that sat on the tip of his nose. 

    “You know, it’s rude to stare,” the boy suddenly said, his eyes still closed. Suhyun snapped straight in her seat, alarmed at the sudden statement. A blush crept along her cheeks as she looked away, ashamed that she had been caught, before a hand landed on her thigh, causing her to look back, “But since it’s you I guess it’s okay.”

    “I wasn’t… staring…” she managed to murmur, her voice barely high enough for him to hear her through the classrooms chatter. He opened his eyes, raising a brow at her obvious lie before chuckling, snuggling back into his school sweater, his stare still on her. She looked away, feeling the warmth of his hand on her thigh fade as he took his hand away, and some part of her wished he would have stayed.

    Class started, and it wasn’t too interesting; Suhyun often finding herself drifting off into a daze as her eyes remained on the chalkboard, her hand automatically copying everything down like a well in tune printer. She saw V out of the corner of her eye, playing games with his fingers and flicking a folded piece of paper back and force between his hands; anything to distract him from the lecture going on in front of them. She wondered whether he ever paid attention, and just how well he could be doing in school since it seemed like he never really paid attention.

    After what seemed like an eternity, the bell rang, signalling lunch, and before Suhyun had put her books away, she saw V was already gone. A little disappointed, but not really surprised, she decided to explore the school on her own, rejecting Namjoon’s offer to eat with the others again today. He was surprised at her boldness, not really understanding her sense of adventure, but decided that it would be best for her to figure some things out for herself, but not before asking if she was absolutely sure she would be okay, and telling her that if she needed anything he would be in the same place as yesterday. Suhyun smiled at him, thanking him for being such a responsible class president and wandered off, promising that if she had anything she needed to ask, he would be the first one she would go to. 

    Wandering around, she remembered how the roof top was often always empty at her old school, and she wondered if it was the same here. The quiet was something she enjoyed, the bustling of students sometimes making her uncomfortable or even in a sense made her feel like she was being swallowed up by a wave with no room to breath. Bounding up the stairs, she pushed open the door and saw V sitting against the railing, a bread bun in between his lips, staring off into the sky, his light brown hair sticking up because of the wind blowing against it. 

    She swallowed hard, gaining the courage to walk up to him, getting his attention as she approached. He smiled at her, taking the piece of bread from his mouth and motioned for her to sit down next to him; she complied, sitting a little farther away than what he meant. 

    “What’s your real name?” she asks, opening the wrapping to her sandwich, watching as he tensed up in front of her before immediately relaxing.

    “V. Just V.” he stated, not really wanting to go any further into this conversation. She could tell he was getting uncomfortable, but she wasn’t really sure why. She held the thought in , thinking it would probably be better to just drop it, and he two of them ate in silence for a little while before the boy spoke up again.

    “Do you think animals have feelings, Suhyun?” he asked, nibbling on the last little bit of his sweet loaf. She thought for a moment, trying to figure out where the question came from, and nodded slowly.

    “I think so.. I think everything does.”

    “Even trees, how about flowers?” he pressed, seeming to get more excited as he thought about the possibilities. She bit her lip, considering his question carefully, distracted by just how cute he seemed to be when he got like this, and wanting to see more of it.

    “I think they have feelings too. Have you ever seen a flower wilt, it looks sad, doesn’t it?’ she answers, her words carefully picked out. V looked down, then back at her, his eyes wide with wonder,

    “You’re right! I never thought of it like that.” he exclaims, happy with her explanation. She bit her lip, chuckling softly at his amazement, feeling her heart flutter at the way he looked at her; as if she was the smartest person on earth. It was odd, she never really found anyone interesting before, and she never took interest in the opposite . She’d never even had a boyfriend; but with V, this boy in which she didn’t even know what his real name was, was someone incredibly different. 

    He didn’t really seem like most of the boys she encountered before. His smile was genuine, wide and boxy— something she was unfamiliar with. It was unique in the way that she wanted to draw it, memorize it— do everything she could to keep the image of it in her mind, and every time he did smile, it made her heart a little lighter. There was something incredible about him, something that drew her in and she had no idea what was going on. She just wanted to get closer to him, to hear his voice, feel his touch— anything that reminded her of his wonderful existence. It was ridiculous, and she knew it, but maybe this is what love felt like. 

    “Suhyun, do you think that humans are on the same level as animals?” he spoke up, interrupting her thoughts as she shook her head, hoping he didn’t notice her staring.

    “What do you mean?” she questioned, tilting her head to the side, not quite grasping what he was trying to say. V looked down, fiddling with his fingers before he spoke again,

    “Do you think human life is more valuable?” he prods, his lips parted when he ended the sentence, waiting for her to fill the gap between them with her answer.

    “I think all life is important, V,” she said, a soft smile forming on her lips as she looked at the strange boy in front of her, the admiration clear in her expression,

    “Hm… I don’t think so.” he replied, scratching his chin. When he noticed her looking at him quizzically, he sighed, seeming to get a little frustrated at the fact that she didn’t quite understand; something he thought she would be able to do already, “I think humans are really bad.”

    “Why?” she asked, feeling a prickling on the back of her neck as the atmosphere changed from comfortable and relaxed to somewhat… tense. V looked at her, his eyes hard with his eyebrows drawn together, trying to see whether he could trust her with his thoughts or not.

    “Because it’s human nature to be bad, I think.” he answered, acting as if that was all she needed to know. Suhyun opened , trying to find the words to tell him that it wasn’t true, and that whatever had happened to him before did not define the entirety of humanity, but she couldn’t. The words hit her somewhere, bouncing off the bones of her ribcage, echoing inside of her mind as she considered the thought. 

    Were humans really bad? And why would anyone do anything to V, something so bad that he would be forced to think this way? She felt a deep sadness in her heart as she watched him, his expression melting from its frustration and seriousness back to it’s childlike innocence, where he acted like nothing happened at all. She wasn’t sure what to say, but she felt the need to hold him, to tell him it was alright— but she didn’t have the courage to.

    “Don’t worry about it, Suhyun. I knew you wouldn’t understand,” he murmured, not looking at her, “You’re just the same as the rest of them, I guess.”

    And just like that, the wind was knocked out of her. She had never really been the sensitive type, but this shook her from to core, so much that she was visibly trembling. The words had hit her so hard it almost felt physical, as she found herself gathering her things and running away from the scene, leaving V behind as he called out to her. 

    She wasn’t sure why she felt so strongly about what he said, but just to think that he thought she was the same as everyone else was somewhat insulting… Was there nothing special about her? To her, he was something incredible, extraordinary; but to him she was just… some girl. The bell rang, signalling the end of the break as she ran back to class like a dog with its tail between its legs. 

    V didn’t show up for the rest of the day, and as much as she liked seeing him, this time she was glad he wasn’t there. She was hurt, but she really didn’t want to let him know that. 

    “Hey, are you alright? You seem pretty down.” Namjoon whispered, coming over from his desk, bag slung over his shoulder after class had ended. Suhyun smiled, the edges of her lips twitching as she nodded, assuring him that everything was fine. But she still couldn’t help the pain resonating from her heart as she thought of the missing brunette that sat so close to her, but seemed to be so far away at the same time. 

    The way home seemed longer, and she didn’t stumble by the cat today. To be quite honest, she was glad, because it started to unsettle her in the way that it would remain motionless, it’s eyes drilling into her as if it knew something she didn’t. 

    Flopping onto her bed, she let out a long sigh, the heaviness in her heart seeming to weigh her down. Suhyun wasn’t quite sure what to think, how to feel; she hoped things would be better by tomorrow but at the same time she was wiser to know that things didn’t work like that, that this feeling might haunt her longer than just a few hours. A light tap was heard against her window, and at first she thought it might have just been her imagination until it happened again. Rising from her resting place, she opened the blinds, looking down and seeing V standing at the gate of her house, dropping the stones that remained in his hands. She almost turned away, until she noticed his expression— it was calm, somewhat sad as he mouthed the words “I’m sorry”, obviously referring to how he had hurt her feelings before.

    Before she could respond, he ran off, the sight of his back disappearing from her view after a few seconds, his shadow disappearing into the sunset as she was once again left to wonder about this mysterious character. 

    Suhyun sat back down on her bed, unsettled by the fact that he had followed her home, but at the same time a little bit thankful that he took the time to apologize to her, even if he didn’t really do anything wrong. A small smile graced her lips as the thought of him invaded her mind, the earlier events of the day excluding that one moment in time in which she felt cast away from him. There wasn’t anything wrong with the way she was feeling, right? There was surely an explanation for the thumping in her chest, the butterflies in her stomach and the stars in front of her eyes. She would ask Namjoon about him tomorrow; he could probably give her more information. 

Nothing to say about this chapter, I hope you guys are enjoying it so far.. Leave me a comment or something and let me know! I don't usually like writing in the narrative, but this is actually pretty fun... So excuse me if I make a few mistakes here and there with the perspective. Thanks so much for reading!

-Celeste