Jackson paced his living room waiting for a phone call from the private detective he had hired, they had already reported Mark's disappearrance to the police but he couldn't trust them. He was beside himself with grief not knowing where Mark was and knowing he was gone because of him. They had woken up in Jeju island to find Mark gone along with all his belongings, they had searched everywhere to no avail. That morning Jaebum had come to check on him when he didn't show up for breakfast and found him sprawled on the floor,out cold. Jaebum had questioned him about the blood on his sheets, the bruise on his face and why he was knocked out. He had ignored him and just run out in search of Mark, but he was long gone. He hopped on the next plane back to Seoul hoping Mark had come home but he had found his apartment empty, that was a week ago. His pace quickened as he remebered the night of the incident, how could he have done that? How could he hurt the only person he had ever loved? This time he was sure he had lost him for good, he was never going to forgive him,hell, he couldn't even forgive himself how could he expect Mark to forgive him. Where was he? Was he cold? Mark didn't like the cold. Did he even have the right to worry about Mark? Maybe he should just leave him alone, but how would he go on knowing Mark was with someone else, he couldn't let that happen, he had to fight and prove himslef to Mark, couldn't he be selfish? couldn't he be greedy? He can't lose h---. His thoughts were cut short at the ring of his phone

"Tell me you found him" he said into his phone

"I'm sorry but not yet" replied the voice on the phone

"What? You can't find a single person in Korea?" Jackson screamed angrily into the phone " What am i paying you that amount of money for?" he yelled

"I'm working on it, one thing i can tell you for sure is that he is not in Seoul" the voice on the phone replied

"Just find him...Please" Jackson said in a calm voice. He hanged up the phone and run out the house headed for Mark's apartment, he went there every night, just incase he had returned. 

~~~7777777~~~

Mark sat on his bed in the dark, knees curled up under his chin, flipping through the tv channels absentmindedly, he was weary of shedding tears, he'd cried so much he doubted anymore tears would fall out if he did. He threw the remote on the bed, walked to the window and peeped behind the curtain. He looked out on the beach admiring the beautiful sunset,he let the curtain fall back down, nothing interested him anymore, it was as if life had lost it's color, he walked back to his bed, laying face down. He was still a littile sore on his backside even though he had healed, if only the wound in his heart would heal as fast, then he wouldn't be such a mess. He hadn't left Jeju island that night, he only checked into a different resort, he needed time to think. He had turned his phone off and stayed in his room all week because he was afraid to go out and bump into Jackson or see him walking by. He had tried to figure out why he still loved him, he was such a fool to still miss him. He should hate him, hate him to death, but the only thing he felt for Jackson was love. He couldn't explain it, was he sick in the head? Why couldn't he just throw him out of his heart? How could he still miss his kiss and his touch after what he did to him?. He had to get over him no matter what it took, he had to be strong and move on, he couldn't love him, never. He started packing his bags to head out for Seoul, Nora was due and he had to be there, even if it meant facing Jackson, afterall he couldn't keep on hiding for ever.

~~~7777777~~~

Mark got home in time, he had arrived three days ago and  Nora littered on the night of his arrival. He knelt beside her litter box trying to figure out what he was going to do with the four new kittens. If only the stupid landlord had fixed his window Nora wouldn't have sneaked out and gotten pregnant and he wouldn't be kneeling there right then without a clue what to do. Why couldn't people be more dependable, why couldn't people be more trustworthy? He tried to pet Nora but she hissed at him protective of her newborns "ok, ok" he laughed getting up to walk away. He walked aimlessly around his home, everything reminded him of Jackson, he couldn't even sit on his own couch without thinking about how good it felt to be held in his arms. He decided to move out, he was going to have to take bold steps if he was going to forget Jackson, besides he hated his landlord. He heard the beeping of his passcode being entered and thought it must be Jinyoung, he had changed it when he got home and his phone was still turned off, he heard banging and headed for the door to let him in.

Jackson had gotten to Mark's apartment as fast as he could when the private detective called him to tell him Mark was back in Seoul, he knew he was on a wild goose chase but he had to try. He entered the passcode and realized it had been changed, he knew Mark wouldn't want to see him but he wasn't about to turn away, it had taken all his courage and strong will to go there and he wasn't about to give up now, he had to let Mark know how he felt, he had to let him know that he was nothing without him. He started banging on the door and was going to keep banging until Mark opened the door.

Mark opened the door and saw Jackson, he had thought over and over again what he was going to do if he saw him again, but he discovered he couldn't move, seeing him for the first time after the incident was overwhelming, his heart was pounding so hard he could hear it in his ears. Jackson felt the lump form in his throat and the tears sting behind his eyes, he tried not to breakdown, he hadn't gone there to ask for pity, he wanted to draw Mark close and kiss away all the pain he had caused him, but he couldn't dare touch him.

Mark tried to push the door shut but Jackson stuck his foot in the door way pushing back "Mark please wait,please" he begged pushing his way into the apartment, he stopped a foot away from Mark. Crack, he heard the sound before he felt the slap that had turned his head to the side on his face. He knew he deserved that and more. Seeing Jackson made Mark snap, the love, the hurt, the pain all mixed together turned into rage. "I hate you, you evil bastard! How could i have ever loved you! I hate you for what you did to me!" angry tears stained Mark's face. Jackson winced at the weight of the words being thrown at him. Mark leaped at him, striking his chest with his fists and scratching his face  "Get out!!! get out!!" Mark screamed hitting him over and over, Jackson just stood there getting hit, but he needed Mark to hear him out, he struggled with him "Stop it! Mark please stop it !! calm down please" getting a hold of Mark's wrist, struggling with him until Mark stopped trying to hit him. Mark snatched his hands away from Jackson and crossed his arms over his chest staring at Jackson.

"I've been looking everywhere for you, people at the company are beginning to tallk, i know because of m----just, please come back to work?" Jackson knew how much dancing meant to Mark and he didn't want him to lose that because of him.

"I don't want to go anywhere that reminds me of you"

"Please Mark don't do this"

"What are you even doing here, can't you just leave me alone? Are you not done hurting me? Haven't you done enough?" Mark shot at him.

"I'm here to ask you to forgive me"

"Why should I?"

"I....because I...I love you Mark" Jackson struggled to say meeting Mark's eye, he had prepared this whole thing he was going to say but the only thing that came out was the simple words he had vowed never to say to any human being, all his feelings for Mark summed up in three simple words. 

Mark let out a dry humourless laugh more out of shock than amusement, had Jackson just confessed his love for him, unbelieveable, he expected him to believe that "You don't hurt people you love Jackson...just leave and never come back".

"I know...I know i messed up big this time and i don't deserve your forgiveness, just hear what i have to say, i swear i'll leave you alone" Jackson took a deep breath and began pacing up and down Mark's eyes following him, Jackson sighed deeply and began, it was now or never "Since the day i met you i've never been my own self again, with you i felt things at places inside of me i never knew existed, you don't have to believe any thing i say now, I know to you i am someone who cannot be trusted, but if you give me one last chance I will prove myself to be worthy of your love, i know i may not be the kind of guy to show how he feels in many fancy ways, but I love you" he paused in his tracks looking at Mark for the first time since he started talking. 

Mark couldn't believe Jackson had just confessed to him twice "I want to believe you, i really do. We've had some bad times but this time the hurt is too much, how could i possibly forg---"

"I know, i know...just please" Jackson said as he went down on his knees in front of Mark "Please, i'm sorry please...forgive me just this once...please.please" Jackson begged in a broken voice as the tears he'd been holding back began to fall, he threw his arms around Mark's waist still on his knees holding on to him and crying his heart out "Please, i know now what you mean to me, please don't turn me away" Jackson pleaded still holding on to Mark. All it took was one look at Jackson clinging on to him and weeping for the walls around Mark's heart to come crushing down, his body moved slowly down at the comand of his heart, he knelt in front of Jackson and as he wrapped his arms around him his mind told him he was going to regret loving Jackson someday.

~~~7777777~~~

Mark was slouched in the couch his feet laying in the lap of Jackson who sat at the other end of the couch, his hands gently carressing Mark's feet as they watched frozen, or as Mark watched frozen while Jackson watched Mark, he'd already had to sit through it more times than he could count, everytime they had to see a movie, it had to be frozen. He watched as Mark said every line in the movie and sang along to the songs, the past one month had been the happiest in his life. He propped his head on his hand and smiled as he watched Mark's face get animated with each line he said. He was grateful, he felt lucky, he tickled Mark's feet to get his attention, but Mark giggled and ignored him pulling his feet away, he grabbed it back and put it back in his lap, he leaned down and kissed Mark's feet which got him his attention "Thank you" he smiled at Mark.

"What for?" Mark blushed embarassed at the sudden affection.

"For taking me as i am"  Jackson held Mark's gaze, god how he wanted to kiss him, he'd been holding back since they started dating, he didn't want to give Mark the wrong idea, he just wanted to show him his true affection, not that he didn't think dirty, how could he not when Mark looked like that. Mark's phone beeped and he watched Mark smile as he read the message, he kind of knew who it was and he was jealous, he knew Mark had eyes for him alone but he still felt jealous.

"Who is it?" Jackson asked even though he knew.

"Yugyeom" Mark replied 

"What does he want?" Jackson's voice was calm contrary to the boiling jealousy he was feeling.

"Just asking if i was home"

"I take it you still haven't told him?"

Mark shook his head "I just don't want to hurt him" he added when he saw the dissapointment on Jackson's face. He got another text and hesitantly looked at it "It's Jnr" he explained to Jackson without being asked. Jackson hummed. "It says E.R, with an address, but knowing Jnr i know it's nothing serious" he added.

"ER sounds serious to me"

Mark laughed. "It's not an actual ER it's just Jnr's code for ' i need you to come right now so we do something not very important'..."

The door bell rang and Jackson went to get it.

"Yugyeom!" Jackson exclaimed surprised to see the young man, so if he wasn't with Mark then he would be alone with Yugyeom? he shook the image out of his head and stood aside to the let him in.

"Hyung! what are you doing here?" Yugyeom asked equally surprised to see Jackson at Mark's house.

"I..uh...i uh" Jackson stuttered.

"and what are you doing coming to my house unannouced?" Mark cut in giving Yugyeom a hug, he felt the daggers being stared into his back and winced.

"Jnr sent me an ER, he said i should get you and come together"

"Ignore it"

"What do you mean ignore it, he might really need us" Yugyeom said.

"He's right, you should go, i'l drive you" Jackson said putting on his Jacket and trying to help Mark put his on, it didn't go unnoticed when Mark took the jacket from him and put it on himself. 

They pulled up in front of a plush apartment complex in the center of the city, and saw Jinyoung crouched behind a car looking at the apartment entrance. They got out and run towards him.

"Jnr?" Yugyeom called his worry evident in his voice. Jinyoung flipped around .

"Shhh, shh" he hushed them turning back to look at the entrance still crouched behind the car

"Down!" he ordered and they all crouched down beside him, Mark shooting Jackson and Yugyeom an i-told-you-so look.

"Jnr?" Mark called "what are we doing?"

"Collecting evidence" Jnr replied taking his digital camera from his pocket "Here, you hold this" He handed it to Jackson who was on his left without taking his eyes off the entrance, he pulled out binoculars from his jacket pocket and aimed at the entrance. Mark exchanged looks with Jackson shaking his head "Sorry" he mouthed at him, "It's ok" Jackson mouthed back.

"Stop whispering behind my back" Jinyoung said his eyes trained at the entrance.

"Does this have anything to do with Bambam perchance?" Yugyeom asked

"Do you need to ask?" Mark spat out angry that his evening alone with Jackson was ruined.

"Don't judge" Jinyoung replied "down, down, here they come" he added. They all craned their necks trying to see who Jinyoung was refering to.

They held their breaths in surprise as Bambam and Taecyeon, a senior form their company, walked out hand in hand. 

"Taecyeon hyung?" Yugeom said trying to figure out what was going on there.

Mark looked over at Jinyoung and saw the quick flash of dismay on his face before the latter forced a fake smile on his face, he saw right through his friend, he knew that the heartless guy image Jinyoung always tried so hard to potray wasn't really who he was "They are not doing anything wrong, right?" he tried to console his friend "Their just holdi..." his words trailed off as Taecyeon pulled Bambam to the corner and they kissed arms tight around eachother.

"Oh Jnr..." Mark tried reaching out to touch Jinyoung's shoulder and had his hand slapped away.

"What are you doing?" Jingyoung raised his voice at Jackson "take the god damn picture" grabbing the camera from Jackson when he didn't move to take the picture himself "gottcha, you sneeky little " he smiled clicking away at the camera. Mark, Jackson and Yugyeom exchanged looks not knowing weather to care for Jinyoung or not, he seemed ok, but Mark could see right through him.

"Are you ok?" Mark asked