Pov Leo

2.00 am

Sleepless. Totally sleepless. In my dark room, I kept to move my body into the faint warmth given by my blankets. I sighed, feeling so helplessly weak.

My eyes wondered for a short while for my room. Messy, full of paper and ideograms everywhere,written many times in many different colours, some clothes left of the chair and the window above my desk, which curtains were opened, letting the glowing white moonlight come, and showering me. My thoughts were crazily spinning in my mind, and they didn't have any mercy for my hurting head.

I turned my back to the white moonlight, and sank my face in the pillow for some seconds before raising it up and close my eyes, trying to sleep, but I only pretended to. I re-opened them, while finding totally pointless doing it. I looked at my alarm o'clock, which was set for 7 am. I sighed again.

I had to calm down, but I felt nervous and my heart felt like it was into a violent storm. I faintly felt something embracing me and giving me warmth, and it wasn't my blanket. I slowly gave myself to that warmth, trusting it without thinking twice. It was innocent and sweet and gave me some kind of protection...

"If I tell someone about all of this, they'll call me crazy"

I didn't need to ask myself from where that warmth came from. I could feel it, I could touch it. It was from him. It was clearly part of him.

I suddenly raised myself, and started looking around as that warmth didn't leave me not even for a couple of seconds. My body was shaking and every trace of tiredness and sleep faded out, along with the faint moonlight that disappeared in between the black night clouds. I wasn't feeling anything beside nervousness. He was here, with me.

Not even a sound was ringing in my dark room, my breaths were no longer controlled as questions with no answer were blurring my mind. When my eyes decided to collaborate with the rest of my body and my confused brain, in the darkness, painted with just a line of white, given my the moon, I started to recognize a tall, skinny figure, holding into the right hand some of my papers, as his eyes were fastly reading them. I was motionless, as I realized with no surprise who was.

How the hell is he here

He didn't realize I was looking at him. I was shaking and the situation seemed like was slipping through my hands. And I didn’t even grasp it as I had to.

A huge want to speak was moving inside of me, I wanted to ask him many things, I even wanted to tell him how I felt protected with his tender warmth. I wanted to be honest with myself, at least once in my life.

-Why aren’t you sleeping?-  His voice was a gentle whisper. I saw some kind of smile taking place onto his lips. Not even the dark could stop me from seeing his figure.

-Why are you here?- I silently asked. Somehow, he managed to come closer in a matter of seconds. I had him staring at me, with his face a few inches from mine. His black eyes were searching something in me, and they were really determinate to find it.

I felt like he could read inside me and that was one of the feelings that got me afraid the most of him.

His breath was gently hitting my face, as the white moonlight started to shower him, once she got free from the clouds that were trapping her from shining in the empty night sky. The light seemed to have such a soft touch on him, like she was trying to embrace him and me, together.

For the first time I felt like I wanted to give in totally and let him say, whisper, do the things he wanted.

He was just looking at me, as our lips were about to collide for how close we were. He silently brought a hand until my cheek and caressed it, as his lips got closer and closer, until they touched mine, with such sweetness and kindness that made me literally melt.

I didn’t even wide my eyes in surprise. I naturally disclosed my lips and trusted him. But my heart wasn’t beating at all, it was stopped in fear. My feelings were divided into trust and fear of the unknown. As always I could say.

The kiss was gentle and innocently alluring, even though his lips felt cold on mine. Maybe I had to think a little, before giving in, but something made me leave everything and trust him, sure about the weird idea that “he’d never hurt me”. That idea, or illusion, or reality, was the thing that was filling me from head to toes.

He my lower lip and funnily bit it, before breaking the kiss. The expression on my face was surely mixed between exstasy, happiness, sleep, and fear. What a mix...

He got up and I understood he was about to leave. I didn’t want him to leave, I wanted him to stay next to me.

Weird idea or not, I wanted to have him with me, I was sure that in that silent night I could understand more of him, just by hearing his breaths.

-Jiho- I whispered. That whisper made him turn around and look at me. Another smile appeared onto his face. I noticed that the dark wasn’t covering him anymore to my sight. I was so used with his presence that I could see it even through the black darkness of that sleepless night.

-Just... don’t go- these words of mine were so low-voiced that I was afraid he didn’t hear me.

-Stay with me- another whisper.

He walked back until my bed and lied next to me, coming again under the sweet touch of the moonlight. His eyes were somewhat shiny and deep, and for the first time I was feeling protected.

-You actually have a single bed. And I’ve always wanted to sleep on the floor so yeah- he laughs at what he said.

-Then we are gonna stay close to each other because you’re not gonna sleep on the floor- I laugh back, finding so cute the way he laughed. Maybe even the coldest mask can actually melt.

-I just can’t believe it-

-What?-

-That you wanna stay with me in the same way I wanna stay with you- after that he took. me closer and squeezed me into a warm hug while laying on the bed. His face was sinking into the crook of my neck as silence fell on us. His words were spinning in my mind, without any stop. He wanted to stay with me, and now that we were so close, I felt like I was the happiest person in this ty world.

-Why did you kiss me?- This question was making my heart throbbing but I wanted to know the answer. I wanted to know why.

-You ask many questions...- he smiles against my skin, and that sent thrills down my back. We were so close, physically and mentally. I heard him taking a deep breath.

-Have you ever experienced the feeling of being wrong? Of being born in a way by mistake? Well, is a feeling I carried heavily behind me until now. Is a feeling that I was sure it would never disappear. But actually it did, and still does, when I’m with you. I’ve never seen you afraid of me, even though I know you are might feeling something out of normal. I... I don’t know how to call it, but it feels good-

His words hit me in the deep, and I stayed silent, as I felt his embrace becoming stronger. I knew the frustration he felt, and it came naturally for me to understand him.

-You are important for me- he finished. I smiled and erased all the meaningless words I wanted to say. Into that embrace, I let the time flow in that silence, and as seconds went by, and as he breaths kept to resound with mine, I was feeling sleepy again. I didn’t need reasons anymore, and that made me feel more calm.

Maybe I’m falling for him. No...wait, erase the “maybe” I’m falling for him.