Massive update:
Please go back to chapter 37 if you came here directly.
Thank you adnacat  for the continued support.
Please know that you're the reason why I updated  6 chapters.
hahaha.
Hope you enjoy!!
 

Chapter 42

KAI POV
"Hello Jong-in."

I never realize I was on the ground and running towards her. I stopped only when her surprised face filled my vision as I was about to hug her.

"Umm." She stammered and looking down.

"You said my name." I managed to gasp out. My hand reached out to tip her chin back so I can see her eyes.

Over the years I have learned to see what her eyes say with her even speaking and now I was expecting happiness to be there but instead it was guilt and sadness.

"But you don't remember." I said and took a step back letting go of her.

She sighed and shook her head.

"I'm so sorry." She said and looked away.

I reached for her hand since I also noted that she was upset.

"Hey it's okay." I said said and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"No it's not.. I should remember you, all of you. I should remember Luka. I – I I'm such a useless human." She said and sniffed.

"Come here you cry baby." I said and tugged her closer. Her eyes looked up to me and I had to remind myself that I can't kiss her- not yet anyway. I smiled at her instead and patted her head. "Why is it that every time I see you you're crying? I thought you hate crying."

"I thought so too maybe Min-shu transfer her tear ducts to me." She answered wiping away her tears.

"True." I said and chuckled as she looked at me in disbelief. "Minny is a cry baby and you became one too after a few months with her."

"I am not a cry baby." She said and sniffled.

"Okay Flo. Whatever you say." I said with a grin and patted her head again. She predictably swatted my hand away.

"Jong In you are such a meanie." She said with a glare that I knew was more bark then bite. I took a deep breath to steady myself from hearing her say my name again.

"What's wrong though? You look sad." I asked.

"We were drinking, what's that korean drink again?" She asked tugging on her scarf, which I recognized was Sehun's. We had brought it together for that bratty maknae.

"You were drinking? You know that you are not allowed to drink." I said.

"I know I know." She said in exasperation. She gave me another glare. "Am I really that bad when I'm drunk?"

"Nope. You're not bad, you're actually cute when you're drunk." I said and grinned as horror came upon her face.

"Oh god. Me cute? No way. Cisco and Zitao are cute I am not." She countered.

"That's because you don't remember." I answered.

"Oh right." She answered and sighed loudly.

"Okay. Now care to tell me what's wrong?" I ask and grabbed her hand. "Come on let's go take a seat."

"Oh. You were drinking too!" She exclaimed when she saw the bottle of Shoju I had with me. I took it before she can even grab it. "Can I at least take a sip?"

"Nope." I said and held it high above her.

"Pillow boy your such a mean person!" She whined and plopped down on some cushions. She gave me the evil eye as I downed the last bit and grimaced.

"You have a very low tolerance for Shoju. You can't handle even half of that." I said sitting down a cushion away from her.

"Bunch of baloney." She muttered.

"You're such a short fuse Flo." I teased.

She reached over and jabbed my side hard.

"Ah. Don't do that Khan. I know where your weak points are." I warned and reached over when she stuck her tongue out at me.

"Don't touch me!" She squealed and I poked her waist. "Jong In!!"

"You shouldn't start something you can't finish Flo." I said and laid down. I propped my head by my hands and waited. She'll tell me what's wrong in her own time. I can wait all night.

"Cisco got drunk." She said after a few minutes of silence.

"Well that was something I wish I saw."

"It was comical at best but you should know that Cisco likes to tell people his feelings. He is not one to hide them."

"Not like you." I muttered to myself.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Carry on."

"Silly Jong In." She said and patted the pompom that was the top of my beanie. She looked afar and sighed again. "It's so hard to explain."

"It's okay. I have all night."

"Cisco.. when drunk is brutally honest."

"Did he upset you?"

"Not really, well yes he did but I was upset because it was true in a way."

"What did he say?"

"He didn't want me to remember any of you."

"Well that is selfish."

"Because he said that you guys hurt me before.."

"Oh."

"Was it true?"

I sat up straight when I noticed how despondent her voice was. She looked up at me, her face looking so scared. I sigh and tuck some strands of hair behind her ear.

"Is it true Jong In?" She asked again.

"I feel like I don't have the liberty to fully answer that alone Flo. We must be all present to be fair." I answered. "But know that we all regretted it very much. We never wanted to cause you so much pain."

"But to make mistakes is to be human."

"But we could have avoided it. I could have avoided it."

"Don't be so hard on yourself Pillow boy. Everyone makes mistakes."

"Hey. I thought you were the one upset?"

She chuckled as she patted my hand.

"It's just.. Cisco said that once I remember you guys I'll forget him. I think that was a bit unfair to say."

"It is indeed."

"He said that I value you guys so much over anything else... but I just think that saying that I'll forget him or Ori is unfair. It's not like if I remember you guys they'll be wiped out of my brain."

"Flo, maybe Cisco is just really scared. He grew up alone and now he only has you and Orianna for family. He is in a new environment. He must be really scared of losing one his close friends. It will be like you took a chuck of that foundation of his self."

"That's a bit too much Jong In."

"Believe me Flo. So many people value you so much. Losing you from their lives would be a heavy loss."

"What happened to you then?"

"I nearly lost my mind."

Her blue eyes widen as she stared at me. I was surprised when she grew teary eyed again.

"Hey. What's wrong now?" I asked. "Are you hurt? Flo?"

"I'm so sorry. So sorry." She cried.

"Flo. It's okay."

"No. Here I am about how hurt I was from what Cisco said and I don't even put into regard how you guys feel. I can't imagine how you guys must be feeling."

"Shuss." I said softly and placed an arm around her shoulders. She leaned into me and continued sobbing. "Flo. It's okay."

"No it's not. I can see how Min-shu tries so hard to smile at me when she looks like she wants to cry. How she restrains herself from hugging me when I know she just wants to do so. How sometimes Baekhyun wants to tell me a joke but stops because I can't understand it. How Chanyeol likes to strum a song on his guitar and looks at me expectantly and realizes I don't know the song. I know you guys want to do so many things but I can't.. I'm so sorry."

"Can you stop being so selfless for a second?" I asked grasping her face.

"But Jong In. I'm disrupting your lives"

"Flo you have done so much for us. Believe me this is nothing to what you gave. If we have to befriend you again then so be it." I insisted. "You are such a martyr. Please think about yourself for once."

"It's so hard. I just want all of you happy."

"Flo. You told me once before that to help others be happy you need to be happy yourself. Find yourself again first. Become happy then come back to us." Come back to me.

"Okay." She said and hiccuped. "I hope you guys won't give up on me."

"Never."

She smiled and I again had to restrain myself from kissing her. She was so beautiful and so alive in my arms.

"You really know how to make me feel better." She said wrapping her arms around me and gave me a hug. I returned the hug and softly planted a kiss on her head.

"That's simple. We just give you food. You're set for life."

"Hahaha."

"Try to find a balance Flo. I know you're anxious to remember us because that will also cause you to remember Orianna's cure but why don't you try to spend a day with just Cisco and Orianna?"

"That's a great idea.. but I think Tao will whine and whine until we allow him to come along."

"I think I can manage to make him get lost in the maze. Will that be enough time for you?"

"Meanie!" She said with a laugh. "I am not allowed to get out of the Manor premises anyway."

"Well you can always have a picnic on the grounds or go swimming."

"Ori will be bored."

"Umm leave her then."

"Oh I know! I can show them some secret tunnels. Do you know about that?"

"You may have mentioned it."

"Really?"

"Yes. You did mention once about them but never got the chance to show me."

"Oh! We can go now! Come on!"

"Right now? Seriously?"

"It's more fun at night! Come on!"

I rolled my eyes at her as she stood up and held out her hand to me. Once I was up she grabbed my hand and pulled me to the other end of the maze. I remember this path lead to another part of the Manor. We eventually exited at the wing far from the front.

"This is exciting. I have never gone back here since I left." Flo said letting go of my hand to run a hand against the wall. She stopped at a random brick and to my amazement she was able to pull it out. The was an aged metal handle behind it and Flo tried twisting it. It was stuck.

"Here. Let me try." I said and gave the handle a hard twist. It squeaked from the rust and budged a bit.

"Put your back on to it young man." Flo ordered and poked my side.

"Stop it Flo." I said pushing her away via the forehead and tried again. This time the handle moved and did a full revolution.

"Great! You're not made of candy and fluff after all Pillow boy." Flo teased poking me again.

"Stop it will you?" I said grabbing her hand and placing it behind her back. The action caused both of us to move closer.

Wrong move Jong In. A very wrong move.

I think my world stood still. It shrunk to just this space with her and me in it. I tried to breathe but it caught it my throat as her eyes meet mine. It held curiosity, surprise and something else. My Flo was somewhere in there. I know she's in there.

"I -" She stopped and gulped as we just stared at each other.

I leaned down closer and I heard her breath catch.

"Jong In." She said and tried to pull her hand away. I let it go and I felt her place one of them on my chest. I wonder if she can feel my heart beating so fast. I place my hand on the small of her back and pulled her against me.

Her perfume, she still smells like lavender and jasmine filled my nose.

"Jong In." She said my name again and I felt her shudder as the breeze blew.

And that snapped me back to my sanity.

I chuckled softly and tucked her head under my chin so I won't see her eyes. I have forgotten how easily she mesmerizes me with her eyes, just by staring at me she can make me go crazy.

"I'm sorry." I said.

I was surprised when she laughed. She pulled away a fraction and grinned.

"You know. If you really want a hug you can just tell me." She said and poked my nose. "No need to manhandle me."

I felt my cheeks heat up as she laughed again but I also noticed the flush of her own.

"I'll keep that in mind." I said pleased that my voice didn't sound that breathless.

"I think I learned to like hugs. Did I?" She asked not pulling away from my embrace but was instead hugging me again.

She is tempting me or what?

"You won't have survived if not."I answered with a smile as she giggled. "Between Minny, Tao and Chen you have to like hugs."

"Who's Chen?" She asked. Her brows furrowed.

"Umm Camel eyes?"I asked snorting at her code names.

"Ahh! Jong Dae!" She said. "I don't know your nicknames yet. I think your names will be okay for now. My mind might over load with the memory triggers."

"You do have a point."I said with a nod and felt her shudder again. "You're getting cold."

"I'm fine. Let's just go inside." She said and pulled away first, I immediately missed her being in my arms. She moved towards the wall and pushed the exposed handle. There was the sound of escaping air and a distinct outline of a door formed.

"What the -" I exclaimed totally surprised and was even more that she was able to easily pushed it back.

"It's not solid stone. It's just a fake wall made of plaster. Nothing to heavy even that a child can pull it open." She explained. "You do know how old our Manor is. It had secret passageways for the people living here to escape during the war."

"This is amazing." I exclaimed.

"I know." She exclaimed laughing as she stepped inside. I followed her after a moment.

"How do we close it?" I asked.

"Just p