1.
Everybody has their own fears.

Jinki, unlike his soft appearance, is surprisingly the bravest guy Jonghyun has ever met. Minho had needed to bury his face in the crook of the leader’s neck at least once every 5 minutes the last time they watched a horror movie together. Maybe it was just because the rapper wanted to touch Jinki, but Jonghyun didn't really want to know.
Kibum is acrophobic (or altophobic or hypsiphobic); the terms smarter people usually used to call someone who become as white as a sheet of paper and tremble like a leaf for the rest of the day after being forced to climb and play at the roof or ride a roller coaster. After breaking 3 plates, 2 bowls and Taemin's frog mug, he learnt his lesson – never ever accept invitations onto those rides again.
Taemin is - after deep analysis - afraid of the dark and thunder. He would usually sneak over to one of the other's beds on a stormy night, or when the power suddenly goes off. (Usually, he'd go over to Jinki’s because it's warm and soft and smells like chicken and candy, although he'd never admit that, and when Jonghyun asked, he'd always tell him without hesitation that he simply liked to see Minho upset.) He always tells his hyungs something sprang up uncomfortably under his bed and it hurt his back so much so he couldn't sleep.

(But in fact, as much as Kibum turned Taemin’s bed inside out after that, he never did find the mysterious thing that hurt the maknae’s back.)


And Jonghyun? He's afraid of uncertainty.

One day, after their exhausting practices, a long, refreshing shower and too-spicy bibimbap, Jonghyun is content enough to lie on his comfortable mattress; all was well and peaceful. He isn't expecting anything, much less the biggest shock he's had in his life, not till a certain someone climbs onto his bed and whispers, "I love you."
Jonghyun blinks, all of his sleepiness disappearing. He glances at his glow-in-the-dark clock on his drawer; it's one in the morning, he sees, squinting through the dim light. He flips over and sees a familiar face, a beautiful one. This boy has sharp features and shiny, cat-like eyes, staring at him with a serious, steely gaze. 
He feels like he's hanging off the edge of the roller coaster again, falling into his fear. He's sleeping peacefully in the middle of an ordinary night, wearing his old black duck-patterned boxers; he'd showered before going to bed, he'd helped Taemin with his Korean homework, he'd sang well during rehearsal, he hadn't skipped dance practice. What on earth did he do, for his fellow member to suddenly confess to him out of nowhere? Jonghyun thinks, no, he knows, something is amiss.
Is it a new scene for a new season of Hello Baby? Or had they been shooting a reality show all along, and he'd bumped his head on something and had amnesia? His mind is racing, trying to find some possible reason for this. He blinks again, looks around the bedroom. Camera? He doesn't see one. Maybe a hidden camera? 

"Um, Kibum-ah, what…?" he tries to think of some coherent words, and fails miserably.

"I love you," Kibum insisted, eyes and voice steady.

"Oh, well… okay. Are you sick? Oh wait, you're drunk, aren't you?"

Kibum’s expression is unreadable when he shuffles off Jonghyun’s bed, walks across the room and out, closing the door with a click.

God, if you want me to bury myself in a hole and not come out until 2035, it’s the perfect time.

2.
Kim Kibum (often nicknamed Key), was born in Daegu on September 23rd, 1991. Today, he is a rapper with a background in water skiing. Jonghyun thinks he's like an unexpected yet beautiful rainbow that comes after the rain. He's difficult but so gorgeous, and he's a math problem Jonghyun's yet to solve. Everything about him is dramatic and unpredictable.
He remembers when Kibum was all hyper and brightened up before their date little walk to the market to buy rice after almost killing Yoogeun by accidentally bumping his little head on the floor. Jonghyun recalls the times he played those don’t-tease-me-yeobo-I-don’t-want-to-have-children-again with exaggerated yelps, squeals, and giggles with Jinki after Jonghyun had refused to give him a goodnight kiss in front of a bunch of cameras and busy staff.
Kibum makes Jonghyun do things he doesn't even know he can do, makes Jonghyun does things he shouldn't even want to do. And Jonghyun is afraid, because this is something he can't control. 

3.
Taemin falls asleep the moment his hits the front seat of the van. Minho has Jinki's head on his lap, the leader curled up like a hibernating squirrel, tired and drained from his musical rehearsal. Kibum's sitting beside Jonghyun, eyes half-closed and head tilted, almost touching Jonghyun's shoulder (and giving him the shivers). They haven't talked about the midnight confession since the moment itself; even their breakfast was rushed and silent.

"You're spacing out," Kibum murmurs, eyes still closed.

"I thought you were sleeping," Jonghyun sighs back.

"No, I'm just recharging my energy," Kibum answers,as he shifts into a more comfortable position, and Jonghyun lets out an acknowledging hum.

"Shut up, hyungs!" Taemin whines, throwing his hat in their general direction.

Kibum grins and whispers a quick thank you when Jonghyun catches the hat almost automatically so it wouldn't hit Kibum (like a reflex, like second nature). Jonghyun's eyes land on the face beside him, unconsciously examining it.

Should a boy have eyelashes that long, and lips that pink?

4.
It's the beginning of one of their rare days off, when Jonghyun's umma calls him at five in the morning. He reaches for his phone under his pillow, mumbles a 'hmm' and a 'yes' and a 'I understand' and a 'no' and a 'won't be late' before hanging up and groans.
Apparently his niece is arranging a garden party for her marriage at 11.00am today, and he – as both a son and a celebrity – has to come for the sake of respecting his family and 'to get his social life back' (or so his mom puts it).
Why on earth do people have to disturb his sleeping hours?

5.
"You know your cousin, there, that one right there," another one of his cousins (yes, he has a big family) says, pointing at a boy standing rather far away, looking uncomfortable under a shady tree. He's younger than Jonghyun, with black hair styled into a little ponytail and a neat grey coat. His eyes are glued on his shoes, the drink in his right hand completely forgotten about. Jonghyun doesn't even remember if he had a cousin like him, though.

"Yeah, what about him? Why is he standing alone like that?" Jonghyun asks.

"He's gay," his cousin answers simply.

Oh. Oh. Jonghyun re-examines the cousin, who now looks like a lost puppy more than anything (as if waiting for someone to understand him). His chest suddenly feels heavy, an uncomfortable sensation creeping into his veins. He doesn't realize he's been staring for minutes until the cousin next to him snaps his fingers in front of his face. "Dude, are you alright? You look pale," he asks, concerned.

"A-Ah, I'm alright. Y'know, just… just jet lag," Jonghyun lies, but even he can hear the deceit in his own words. His cousin notices this too, it seems. "But you came here by car, Jong."

There's a cold silence, until his cousin decides to break it. "Oh. Wait, don't tell me you're like him. You're gay?" his cousin asks cheekily.

Jonghyun nearly chokes to death on his cocktail, coughing, "What?! Ew, no dude, what the heck?"

His cousin laughs lightly, brushing him off. "I know, I know! Kidding, man. Y'know, dad said their species," and Jonghyun winces slightly at the choice of words, "is a fault. Like, when we order something, but the shop ends up sending you the wrong product? Like that. They're a fault from the source, impossible to fix. And your dad will surely kill you first, before you can even say anything after 'dad, I'm not into girls'! God, that'd be hilarious!" Jonghyun gets a hard pat on the back, his knees almost buckling under him.

(He laughs, but he wonders how it sounds like a death bell in his ears. For the rest of the party, his ponytailed cousin stood in the same corner alone.)

6.
Taemin is preoccupied with Minho's PS, settled nicely in front of the television, biting his lower lip in full concentration. Jonghyun hears clinking from the kitchen; Kibum's making something again. He tries his best to ignore Jinki's giggling and Minho's amused hum from the opposite couch, where they were whispering like little girls. Minho starts tickling Jinki's waist, and the giggles turn into hysterical laughs. Taemin turns and facepalms, but wears a knowing smile the entire time. The older takes revenge by tickling Minho's side and they soon fall off the couch, struggling and shrieking like five-year-old kindergarteners. It's only after Minho's ankle hit Taemin's back and Kibum rushes in fron the kitchen to hit the rapper's head with a pan that they stop. Jinki's panting, still flushed and giggling.

"Meanie!" he squeals, hitting Minho's broad shoulder and displaying his cute mehrong.

"You're sick," Jonghyun murmurs under his breath, and he doesn't realize he let the words slip out until Minho turns to face him. "What?" the rapper breathes, releasing Jinki's arm and narrowing his eyes till they were almost slits.

But Jonghyun's mouth seems to have a mind of its own, when he hisses, "You two are sick. Could you take your gross affection to your own room?"

The noise disappears just as fast as the color on Jinki's face. Jonghyun wonders how Taemin's angelic, soft face looked like a wild lion's, just as the sound of Kibum working at the kitchen stops. He slams his magazine onto the wooden floor before rushing into his room. He knows he's being childish and ridiculously emotional, but damn it, he couldn't help it. He feels so… disgusted.