A L O N E

One day she asked me, 

"Aren't you tired of being alone?"

Six words. Six words that haven't left my mind ever since she said it. 

Am I tired of being alone? 

Maybe but I can't tell.

We were in the school's rooftop when she asked me.

I was supposed to be alone, trying to get away with all the noise in the hallway but she managed to follow me.

She was the only girl who ever bothered talking to me, telling me stories while I would listen.

She was the only girl who tried to get to know me. The Real Kim Jiwon and not Bobby whom everyone knows.

She was the only girl who opened my heart and showed me the good things in life.

But everyone messes up once in a while

And I did.

In our last year of college,

I let go of the only person who loved me for who I really am.

I let go of the only person who put in so much effort just to get close to me.

I let go of the only person I would want to spend forever with.

After five years,

Seeing her again in front of me, in a coffee shop where we used to go to...

She asked me again,

"Aren't you tired of being alone?"

Way back in college, I didn't have an answer because

I didn't picture myself with someone whom I want to spend forever with

But seeing her again brings back too many memories.

Too many, it hurts.

And seeing a wedding ring on her ring finger, knowing that I wouldn't be able to get her back in my life.

Now I know the answer,

Am I tired of being alone?

Yes, I am.