Part V

( But will she do the same for him?)

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Chaerin had sleepless nights from the day it was known that she has conceived, till the day she confronted Jiyong to reveal her state to him, and till today, the day after Jiyong suggested they ran.

Everything happened over the course of five months, and by then, Chaerin barely had any energy or appetite left.  She grew alarmingly thin and fatigue, she had dark circles under her eyes, and she has completely lost the glow she once possessed. The Empress Dowager had been worried before, but not so much anymore ever since Royal Consort Lady Kim had conceived as well, and the former was twice as delighted.

The King, on the other hand, hardly ever visits Chaerin. That did not come as a surprise at all, since Chaerin knew that the King was fully aware whose child she was bearing. Chaerin was grateful enough that he did not reveal the truth to anyone, nor did he harm Jiyong in any way possible. The King spent more time with Lady Kim, and Chaerin could not say if she was exactly happy or unhappy of that arrangement.

As her stomach grew larger day by day, Chaerin’s worries grew as well.

Her worries seemed to have hit the brink when the King spontaneously showed up at her residence one evening, bearing a grim expression on his face. His Majesty did not dwell too long in the awkward silence in the air, and she was horrified to hear what he has to say to her.

“You should know by now, what I have already known.” He said softly with an unreadable tone. By now, Chaerin was physically and mentally exhausted, and she wondered with all her might, why the King was still so calm. That evening marked the first evening she was alone with the King again, and Chaerin could only nod.

She has had an affair, and all the King could ask was if she knew that he knew?

“I’ve always had this feeling that General Kwon was more than just a godbrother to you.” The King continued, “But to the extent of your lover?”

Chaerin flinched at the word, and said nothing to defend herself.

“Does your father know of this?” The King snared, finally showing his resentment towards what has happened. “What do you think he would react if he finds out?”

“Your Majesty, please,” Chaerin’s heart raced immediately, “Please don’t tell my father…” She could only plead, feeling pathetic about herself to be caught in such a tangled mess.

The King seem to have everything planned out, for he continued to say, “You should be grateful, for I have decided not to pursue this any longer.”

Shocked, Chaerin could only stare wide-eyed at the man in front of her.

“Also, I am going to give you one final chance to redeem yourself.”

Chaerin’s heart continued to palpitate, and when the King glanced up to look at her, she could see the hardness in his glare. If there was any love to begin with for the both of them, there was none anymore.

“You will abort the child.”

Hearing such a sentence from the King’s word shocked Chaerin to great length. In fact, being shock was an understatement. Chaerin was aghast, confused and horrified at the thought of her innocent and unborn baby being forcefully killed, but as she tried to search for any mercy in the King’s eyes, she found none.

“It will be difficult, but you will do it.” It was more of an order than a choice, and Chaerin felt defeated again. “Better now than when the baby is born.”

“It…the child is innocent,” She tried to plead, to make the King understand that this was not right, but His Majesty shook his head and refused to compromise.

“The child will pay for your mistake.”

Chaerin slumped backwards, her hand limply touching the bump on her stomach. “I…”

“If you do this, then it will remain as a secret forever. No one will know of what has happened. Isn’t that what you want?” The King pressed on firmly, refusing to accept any answer but a ‘yes’ from his Queen. “You should be grateful I am not pursuing this any further. You should be grateful that you are still here, well and alive. Most importantly, you should be grateful that General Kwon is still alive.”

Chaerin felt sick hearing those words from the King’s mouth, her mind in a whirlwind as she tried to recollect her thoughts again. “This is not a choice I am giving you. It is an order.”

In vain, her thoughts were tangled too complicatedly, and it was too late for her to untangle them again. This was all too big a mess for her to fix—the knots were tangled to a dead end.