A/N: This chapter is focused on Jiyong only.   As a warning it is very dark, please read with caution.  This will most likely be a 2-Shot.  It was harder to write than I thought previously.  Please enjoy and leave comments.

“A Boy” by: G-Dragon (Translations by Beau @ bbvipz)

It's deep in the night but I can't sleep

Fighting against the worsened headaches

Twisted and turned until I was deep in my thoughts then grabbed the pen again

The lyrics that I’m writing with no space in between have my philosophy

My room that’s filled with white smoke is cozy like home sweet home

I’ve came here with no rest since I was 13

When there’s an uphill there’s always a downhill

Too late to go back I can’t let go

            His cell phone vibrated again.  It has been vibrating non-stop all week.  His parents were calling him again, and his friends were texting him non-stop.  The ragged and tired man doesn’t even turn to look at the phone.  The list of missed calls and unread message continue to grow, as Kwon Jiyong lay in his dark room in complete despair.  Just a few days ago he had uploaded a 30 second preview of his new song off his solo album; Heartbreaker, it was his pride and joy.  His very first solo album, something he had spent countless and endless nights sweating over.  And now it was all going to be smeared and tarnished by the critics of the world.  Kwon Jiyong versus the World, Round 1.  Ding! Within hours of releasing the sneak preview the net cafes, blogs, and online sources were flooded with comments suspecting plagiarized content.  The netizens started to slander his song, his work, his character, and worst of all his existence.  It hurts as it never hurt before.  The hard work, sweat, and tears that he has poured into his dream were starting to seem futile.  Was this what he was working for all of this time?  Was this all worth it?  Continuously under the scrutiny of the critics, and the hate of those that just do not understand, Jiyong emotions raged through him.  As he forced himself out of bed, threw on whatever clothes he could find, and made his way to the YG building, Kwon Jiyong couldn’t helped but feel as if he really didn’t belong in this type of world.

            “Yes, hyung.  I’m on my way.  We can talk about it once I get there.  See you soon.”

            Putting on a fake smile, Jiyong bowed and thanked the dancers and other staff.  His album had just been released a few weeks ago, and he was doing the usual promotions and music chart performances.  Regardless of the controversy pertaining to the plagiarism, YG Entertainment CEO, Yang Hyun Suk hyung had thought it would just be best to continue as planned.

            “We’ll see how everything pans out first, once the full song and album is released.  This might just be due to the anticipation of the album, Jiyong.  There’s always going to be people that loves the stuff you write, and people that hates it and tries to find things wrong with it,” Yang Hyun Suk had said to him.  And so Jiyong did his best to deflect the negativity surrounding him and took the criticism into stride.  Criticism he can take, all artists and performers need critics to improve.  But it was the hateful comments that he couldn’t ignore.  The accusations continue to escalade to the point that people were no longer criticizing his song, but criticizing him as a person.  ‘You should just commit suicide.’ What had I done to make these people leave such hateful replies towards me?

            Sitting in front his laptop at the desk, Jiyong couldn’t help but continue to search the web and forums reading the comments left by fans and antis.  It was like a sickness.  He knew that he should just ignore everything and that with every word he read, he was just digging a bigger hole from himself.  But he couldn’t stop reading.  His comeback stage has ended, and now that he was out of the spotlight, Jiyong had hoped the backlash from his fame would finally die down.

            “Wishful thinking, Jiyong,” he scoffed to himself.  Even after all this time, the news and media has not let up one bit.  Slamming his laptop closed, Jiyong threw himself on his bed muffling a silent scream into his pillow.  It feels as if his soul was torn, the whole world was against him and his dream.  And for the first time Jiyong cried, not due to exhaustion or stress, not because of happiness or accomplishments, but for the first time Jiyong cried for the dream that he was losing.

            Day after days passed without Jiyong knowing, days that slowly became weeks.  He avoided all calls from his family and friends, avoided speaking or looking at anyone if he could when he did go out.  He felt like he was a sinner, even though he knew he did not do anything wrong.  He felt ashamed.  Having no appetite for food, Jiyong almost ceased to eat, losing weight at a drastic rate.  He no longer cared about the things happening in the world around him, it was a different world now, one that he wasn’t a part of.  Jiyong subconsciously found himself crawling into that little hole that he dug. Hiding himself in the deepest and darkest part of his mind.  The void grew, and the impenetrable black wall that was built became fortified.  Maybe they’re right; maybe I don’t deserve to exist…  I hate this place! I hate this world!  Why can’t they leave me alone?  Just leave me alone.  LEAVE ME ALONE.  Please… please I beg you.