“How could this happen?” Jinyoung cried into his hands- sitting in fetal position on the hospital bed as the doctor shuffled through a few more papers with a deep sigh.

            “We tend to keep conditions like this private from the public for the parent and child’s safety since there may be violence or hate towards the families, but you are one of the rare men who are able to get pregnant”, the doctor explained with empathetic eyes. “Rather than having ambiguous ia- you have an ambiguous reproductive system. You are one of the rare interual people with a uterus and fertilizable eggs connected to your passage. While the uterus isn’t as fully-formed as a complete woman’s would be, it was conditioned enough to accommodate an embryo.”

            The doctor tried to continue despite the tears running down Jinyoung’s face.

“In short”, he started. “You are pregnant.”

Jinyoung touched his stomach, knowing good and well that he wouldn’t feel anything, but started to cry harder because he was touching life inside of himself.,

                        H was carrying a baby.

“You’re homoual, correct?” The doctor asked with a nod because he already knew the answer.

            Jinyoung just clamped his eyes closed as he gave a mute nod.

“Then do you know who the father of your child is?” The doctor probed a little deeper.

            That was it, Jinyoung began to sob out loud.          

He knew exactly who the father was- he knew that he did wrong. He betrayed his bandmates and his closest friends. The couple he so happily congratulated and wrote fan fictions about in the past would ultimately die because of him. The crew that would work every two weeks to put out another chapter would look at him with disgusted eyes. Jinyoung could imagine Gongchan’s look already- he hated cheaters the most and Baro would pretend to be fine then never contact him again. He could see Sandeul’s face full of sadness form the betrayal and Shinwoo unsupportive glare.

            He should have never slept with Shinwoo- he was Sandeul’s fiancé for God’s sake.

            Jinyoung knew something would go wrong when he decided to sleep with a taken man. He knew he would be punished when he was curious about why Sandeul always had so much fun.

            The doctor sighed again. “ This seems to be very painful for you, and though I don’t usually do this procedure- I could offer you an abortion.”

            Jinyoung jumped. “No! I couldn’t! This is a baby- I c-can’t just get rid of it . . .”

The words pained him to say. He wanted so badly to just erase the tiny dot in his body that would soon be the rest of his life- but he couldn’t do it.

                        He already saw a baby inside him.

            Saw a future he already hated, but knew he had to live with.

“I’ll have the baby, just please tell me what to do”, Jinyoung mumbled, resigning his head to his hands.

            He would have to do this. This was his responsibility. His punishment.

Is this angsty? Should it be rated M? Are you wondering why I didn't write Leobin? Well I have no answers.

I really should try to portray a better image since this is going to be read by contest mediators and other contestants-*deep sigh*