Present Day

Even tough your warm smile, I know inside you are suffering.  Even though I am quiet, i feel so bad.  It’s silly how this world functions only with appereances.  We are not who people think we are.  We create a cartoon of ourselves.  You are the one who tought me that when we became friends.  At that time i was losing myself, i started to believe the fake Yoona SM created for my fans, but luckily I met you, and despite my rudness, you accepted to be my friend, you accepted to help me, and that’s why it hurts to see you suffering.

September 2011

“Oh, I’m really sorry Mr I didn’t know it was you whom we were waiting for… I was just joking you know? Please please forget my rude words” Yoona was worried. He was her sunbae.  She felt really bad talking like that about him.

“Well, I guess you are right, I am a bastard after all.  I didn’t know SNSD was coming to have dinner with us, otherwise i wouldn’t took so long in the store.  I am sorry Im Yoona-ssi” the way he talked was calm yet it had a teasing sound. He was still looking at her with a smile.

Yoona look up with eyes wide open.

“You know my name sunbaemin?” She asked in shock.

“Haha, come on.  You have to be either deaf or blind if you don’t know Girl’s Generation.  I do not know the name of all the members but you are Jiyoung’s favorite member in SNSD, plus your face is in every TV cannel. Ooo, wait, do you know my name?”

Yoona was about to reply when Yoonchun opened the back door and got in the car.  He was hanging a plastic bag.

“Hey Bingu, what did you do to the young lady in the cash machine? After you left she was still asking about you.  She didn’t even notice i was from JYJ” Yoonchun took out a beverage for TOP and hot chocolate for Yoona. “Oh, sorry, where are my manners? Lovely Yoong this is the bastard I was talking you about, many people know him as TOP, but for friends is just Bingu Bastard” Yoonchun was laughing and took a time before he recovered. “Yah, Bingu, this is my favorite girl. I have all kind of hopes in her.  She is someone special to me, so please don’t bother her, I know how pretty she is but please, don’t mess around with the nation’s goddes, Im Yoona” Yoona bowed at him, Top bowed back and the car.

“Yoona-ssi, are you coming with us?” Top asked withouth looking at her.

“No, we have to drop her in her dorm, i’ll give you the directions” Yoonchun answered before Yoona could reply

During the driveway, Yoonchun told Yoona how he met TOP.

Jaejoong had been friends with Kim Hyun Joong since teenagers.  They stayed as friends after their debut and were called 4D idols.  One day DBSK had to share stage with SS501, so they met backstage.  At first was Yoonchun who initiated the talk, him and Kim Hyun Joong became friends right away. That night the popular Kim Hyun Joong invited Jejoong and Yoonchun to dinner. While they were talking Yoonchun saw TOP coming into the restaurant, so he invited him to join.  The four of them became inseperable since then, fans even called them the F4 idols.

“Well, we are at your dorm SNSD goddes. You can have your sleeping beauty time now” Top teased Yoona while she was unlocking the seatbelt.

“Yah, I told you not to bother her” Yoonchun hit Top’s shoulder.

“Oo, I am fine Oppa.  After the way I talk to him before, he has the right to joke this way.  I’m going now.  Thak you for bringing me and have a good night” Yoona got out of the car. Yoonchun got out too and acompanied her to the door.

“Well princess Yoong, have a good rest, and remember to text me often.  I can’t live withouth your senseless jokes” Yoonchun said.

“Aigoo, look who is talking.  Nobody even smile when you talk”

“What? Haven’t you seen me? I am the party myself, people always look for me if they want to have a good time, that’s why i am friends with the F4 idols, they would be really boring withouth me” both Yoona and Yoonchun laughed at the last comment.  Yoonchun waited until she went inside.

Once in her room, Yoona wore her pijamas and remove her makeup. She started to laugh alone remembering the comment of Park Yoonchun, when suddenly her phone received a message. 

“Hope you don’t mind.  Seohyun gave me you number since after you left.  Are you sleeping?” Yoona looked at the number with curiousity.

“Who are you?” She had to ask.  Seohyun had gave her number withouth asking? Impossible, maybe this was a joke from someone.

“Oh sure, im really dumb.  I’m Jonghyun, from CNBlue, your brother in law.  It’s just after you left I was getting asleep again when Seohyun came to talk to me.  I told her I was talking to you before.  And her, being so polite gave me your number just in case I had something to tell you”

“I see. I was scared.  Thank god it is you.  Im so sorry for leaving like that. I had to meet a good friend I can only get to see every three months”

When Jonghyun received the message he was resting in his dorm bed. He was happy but when he saw the words “good friend” he couldn’t help but to think how long it was going to take to make Yoona considered him as a friend too. He already felt she was his friend.  “I must be crazy.  You said you were sleepy.  Well, I just wanted to know.  Thank you for tonight.  The party could have been really boring withouth you” Jonghyun replied.  Maybe that was too much.  Why he had to be so straightforward with Yoona?

“I must be thankful to you too. I needed that conversation.  Can I tell you a secret? Sometimes I forget who I am.  Yoona the idol or Yoona the normal person, the one that has a caring father and a loveable sister. Thank you very much.   You reminded me today I am not so lost after all” Yoona sent the message and smiled.  Suddenly she thanked Jessica and Yuri for forcing her to go to that party. The sky was really dark but that didn’t matter.  The only thing she wanted to do was to see her father.  If she had had time to go to that party, then she also had time to visit her father.  Yoona opened her cell-phone one more time.

“Seororo, it’s me Yoona.  Listen I really wish to scold you, but everything you do is always right.  Thank you for giving Jonghyun my number” Yoona said

“Unnie, I know.  I saw you talking to him. Did he cheer you up? ” Seohyun asked smiling.

“Well, that’s a secret.  But since you are the responsible maknae, the only thing I can tell you is I feel less depressed now”

“So he did.  He is really a gentleman.  Good good guy…” Before Seohyun could finish, Yoona heard Jung Yonghwa saying “Yah, if he is really that good how come you ended up with me?” Yoona was laughing on the other side of the phone. “Have to go, choding Yoong is being jealous” Seohyun hang up.

Yoona took a jacket and her keys.  She drove to her father house. It was around eleven pm and she had to be ready at eight in the morning for her schedule, but she wanted to see her father.  Yoona hadn’t seen him for a while.

Her car parked in front of a beautiful house. She was complete covered so no one could recognize her.  She pressed the bell three times before her father opened with a blue nightgown and tired eyes.  As soon as she removed her cap her father smiled widely.  He hugged her tight and then looked at her with a shoking expression.

“What are you doing here?  It’s really late”

“Apa, I wanted to see you”

“Me too” that was all he said.  He went into the house and prepared coffee. They sat at the living room togheter. 

“Dad, how have you been?”

“I just told you on the phone kid”

“I know but, I nedded to confirm.  You look tired, but still handsome, don’t worry” Yoona smiled, as well as her father.

“Of course I am, or did you think you’re beautiful just because?” they spend two hours talking before Yoona decided it was time to go back to her dorm.  The girls were probably on their way too and she didn’t warn Taeyeon she was going out.

When she was about to leave, her father gave her fruit and a box with her favorite cookies. Yoona felt like crying. He was really a character.  As most fathers he waesn’t sure how to express his love through words, but his actions yelled how much he loved Yoona.

Yoona was halfway when her car started to stop out of nowhere.

“Please, don’t do this to me” She was praying.  It was now 2:30am.  The road was lonely and dark, but that didn’t stop her car, only after ten minutes of struggle her car stoped completely.  This time Yoona was crying for real.  She had such a bad luck.  Her head hit the horn several times until someone knocked the car’s door.

“Hey, Miss Yoona, I tought you wanted to sleep.  You were liying so you could continue the party on your own right?”

Yoona turned her head, with swollen eyes.  When Yoona saw him, she gave TOP the most thankful smile hoping the swalloness of her eyes was now gone. She opened the window.’

“Good night sunbaenim.  I’m sorry.  I wasn’t lying, but I remembered I had to meet someone, so I came here in a rush.  You must be tired.  Plese just go to your home now safely” Yoona was lying this time.  She was waiting for him to offer to take her home.  She didn’t want to be there alone.

“Come on, I’ll drive you home.  It’s cold and someone might see you”

“Are you sure?” She asked pretending she didn’t care.

“Please I insist.  I can’t let you here” that been said TOP opened the door for Yoona. She closed her car and TOP guided her to his car.  When they were inside he started to drive. Yoona was really worried he would ask questions about what was she really doing and why, but instead, she was really surprised when he kept quiet, not even looking at her, just concentrated in the road. 

“I own you one.  Thank you very much” Yoona said shyly.

“Yeh you do.  I’m quiet because I am thinking what should I ask you” He smiled.

“Woah, you are really something” Yoona and TOP laughed. 

“Wait, you can start by telling me what you were doing at this our on a lonely road.  You must have suicide toughts” TOP response took her by surprise, so by instinct she raised the volume of the radio.  The song playing: Feel Good Inc by Gorillaz. The problem: Yoona waesn’t familiar with the song.

Yoona started to scream as if she was in a concert just in the part were the lyrics said:

 Love forever love is free 


Let’s turn forever you and me 


Windmill, windmill for the land 
Is everybody in?

TOP at first loked at her with an “I don’t know you” face, but he loved this song, specially the rap coming, so he started to sing along.

Laughing gas these hazmats, fast cats,

Lining them up like cracks, 


Ladies, homies, at the track 
its my chocolate attack. 


, I'm stepping in the heart of this here

Care bear bumping in the heart of this here


watch me as I gravitate 
hahahahahahaa. 


Yoona had no idea what he was singing, but one thing was for sure: he was amazing.  His voice was deep and refreshing.  His rap was the best she had ever heard, so she started to clap her hands and move her head one side to another.

They listened the whole song three times more, until Yoona almost believed she was as good singing the rap as TOP, but the only part she could actually sing was “Love forever love is free”.

When they arrived Yoona’s dorm she promised she was going to listen more of that group, so she asked TOP’s cellular to ask him for more of Gorillaz songs.  He smiled.

“You are really clever Miss Yoona.  I know you just want my phone number, don’t worry I’ll pretend you are doing it just for the songs” Yoona laughed.

“Sorry but you are not that lucky” She replied.  TOP took out the cd out and put it inside its box.  Then he gave it to Yoona.

“ Come on, start with these.  I’ll give you the list later”

“No sunbae, it’s yours.  I can buy one by myself…”

“Take it.  I’m only giving it to you cause I think you are interesting.  To be honest I used to see you artists of SM as fabricated dolls.  I guess part of the reason was because I don’t really like the music you create.  But now I am friend of Yoonchun and Jaejoong, and those two have an amazing talent.  Tonight I meet you, and you are pretty special too, you proved me I was wrong.  You don’t judge a book by its cover”

“That’s what my father says all the time” Yoona was smiling. This time she accepted the cd.

“Ok, now go directly to your bed, cause this time I won’t rescue you.  Oh, and don’t forget to check about your car tomorrow”

“Woow sunbae.  You really are like my father, haha.  Thank you very very much.”

While Yoona was walking to her dorm, TOP was smiling like an idiot.  He took out his Iphone and played “Feel Good Inc” one more time, two more times, three more times.  Every time he played it he reminded the laugh, the movements and the voice of Im Yoona.  He kept thinking how beautiful she was, and how lucky he felt.  The most interesting thing about her: she was real.