sorry for not updating. . . . i'm just busy and i know this chapter, you wont like it 

Chearin’s POV

My head, spinning, I felt really dizzy but not as stingy as the times that It feels like it will crack. My eyelids are heavy but I tend to open my eyes for I can feel a weight on my right arm and its becoming numb. As a slowly open my eyes, my vision is still blurry, tilted my head to the right as I can see an angelic face, sleeping soundly, she looks so tiered, her eyes are still swollen as her head rested in my arm and her right hand is holding mine, like she doesn’t want to let go her grip is still firm even if she’s sleeping.

As I watch her in her peaceful moment I cant stop admiring her face, all her figure but behind its edges is the girl that I loved, the reason that I still have the strength to wake up, laugh and smile even if I don’t feel like it. Her charisma, cuteness and innocent charm is one of the many reasons that I am proud to tell everyone that she is mine and I own her heart, but the question is, is she proud of me? Does she even talk about me? Or did she only said ‘YES’ because she will feel pity if she will reject me? But the question that really stuck my heart is does she really love me or does she even enjoy my company? I know I have been thinking negative things but since that day, as the person that everyone wants, the only girl that I gave my whole heart to, is the first person that felt ashamed at me.

Should I wake her up? But, she looks like she still needs some sleep. . . . . . As I wonder while searching some answers in her sleeping face my father interrupted my thoughts. “Hey, honey you’re already awake?” He said while he entered the room, holding a cellophane that I assumed is composed of different kinds of fruits.

“yeh, how long was I sleeping?”

“maybe about twelve hours?” he said while arranging the fruits in the table

“oh”

“and that girl of yours, keeps holding your hand she never even bother to drink, eat or even take a bath because she’s afraid that if you’ll ever need someone or you’ll feel hurt again no one can pay attention” he smirked while looking at Dara and turned to face me with that sparkling eyes “you’re really lucky to have her, if I were you I will start planning my future with her” then he sat down, picked up a news paper and start scanning it that left me with the words he said. ‘I was planning that dad, to be happy and be with her forever but that was . . . . . BEFORE‘ I said inside my mind I don’t want to let him know that I’m not with her anymore.

“hey, baby,  are you feeling fine? Is your head hurting again? Do you want water?” she asked rapidly as she woke up she didn’t even took time to look at her self, but I just stared at her blankly, I want to say something but my mouth wont open my tongue tide.

“hey? Tell me what’s wrong?” she said and cupped my cheeks I can see in her eyes that she is extremely worried I want to take that away, but my mind is not processing well, I’m a very attentive person but when it comes to her, every move of her can make me fly into a different world especially now that my thoughts is interrupted with our status and my doubts about her. I just stared deep into her eyes with millions of questions and accidentally blurted my reply “You” I can see her expression changed, water formed in her eyes instead she smile but I still can see the hurt in it and she simply said “I know” with that a single tear streamed down from her eyes and down to her cheek. I noticed that we are the only one who is in the room my Dad magically disappeared that made the right moment for us to talk.

I cant stand seeing her like this, I love her, I cant deny that. I cupped her left cheek with my right hand and wiped her tears with my thumb, but I know my face still show no emotion, but deep inside I want to shout to the world that I love this person in front of me but again I was taken aback for I don’t want to waste my ‘ILOVEYOUs’.

Dara’s POV

I’m still staring into her eyes. I cant help but to cry, I have been a bad girlfriend, no, I’m the worst, I really didn’t show her how much I love her, she always gives but she never asked for anything instead she just keeps on agreeing on any of my request she’s the most perfect partner but I just wasted all of her efforts, by not giving her the only thing she wants and that is to have my parents blessing so I can be completely hers.

 “shhshh Dara, please stop crying” she hushed with her sweet yet gentle voice while caressing my cheek. Her warm touch can really make me calm and comfortable its like in her hands is where my home is “Dara, we both need some space” she said but her approach is still comforting “and trust me, I needed you more than you needed me (sigh) but I just want you to look for your true happiness, look around into your world without me, maybe, just maybe you can find your home that you can stay forever” I can see tears in her eyes that made my sobs more heavier then I let go of her cheek and held her hand

“is that what you want? Is leaving you alone can make you happy?” I need to ask this, but please let me hear the words that I wanted to hear.

She just continued her silent cry that made me want to punch her, she has a mouth why can she answer? and I hate to see her like this the CL that I know is a strong person, why is she so weak now? Its like its not her.

“Dammit!!! ANSWER ME LEE CHEARIN!!!!” I lost my temper and clenched her hand as she continue to be silent she’s getting into my nerves, I can’t understand her if she will just continue to shut her self up how can I understand her feelings? then I saw her open she was about to speak and my heart beat faster as I was waiting for her answer

“just, just leave me alone Dara, please, just this one time listen to what I said, just this once please” she said with a low and breaking voice I want to hug her , to kiss her but no I have no rights, she is now begging and I have never granted anything that she asked.

I loosen the grip on her hand and slowly letting it go, as I stood up I looked at her for the last time, she is not looking at me s