If the previous sixteen years old Kwangmin desperately wanted to ignore the message Youngmin sent him, different thing applies to the current sixteen years old Kwangmin. Kwangmin quickly runs to the said place, heart pounding hard in his chest, body sweating like hell even though it’s almost winter already. Kwangmin never felt this nervous before, not even when he played in the basketball tournament for the first time or when he flew a commercial plane full of passengers for the first time.

As expected, once Kwangmin arrives at the rooftop, he discovers Youngmin sitting at the edge of the parapet, looking up at the grey sky. At this moment, Youngmin might be the one who looks up at the sky, but later, it will always be Kwangmin who does this, in hope of seeing a glimpse of his beloved other half once again. But, all Kwangmin will see are just clouds, birds, kites, and planes.

“Youngmin, what ar-” Kwangmin decides to ask the question, although he knows perfectly what is going to happen in the next five minutes. And just like what happened before, Youngmin interrupts him before he has done speaking. “There is something I need to tell you. I’m actually against the idea of you flying.”

Kwangmin internally scoffs at that sentence, finding it so ironic. Youngmin might be against the idea of him flying, but in the end, he will be the main reason that pushing Kwangmin to do it for the rest of his life. And Youngmin will never know that sometimes Kwangmin is just so tired of searching something invisible in the wide sky.

Yet, Kwangmin also feels glad that he decides to keep flying, because if not, he probably will never meet Bora at Haneda Airport. Bora’s clumsiness will be showing when they first meet and Kwangmin, being a nice man he is, will help her picking up her stuffs that are fallen from her bag. And from there, Kwangmin will know that Bora will be flying to Seoul using the plane that he will drive. Everything will go smooth afterwards, like they are really meant for each other.

Wait. Kwangmin mentally utters, finally realizing something. If Youngmin doesn’t die, that means everything will be completely different from what he has been through in the future.

If Youngmin doesn’t die, perhaps Kwangmin won’t need any psychology therapy because he won’t fell depressed, that means he and his mom will never meet Mr. Lee and Sungyeol, and she will forever be unhappy because Mr. Lee is indeed the new source of her happiness. Kwangmin also will never have a cheerful step father like Mr. Lee and a childish step brother like Sungyeol.

If Youngmin doesn’t die, perhaps his friendship with Hyunseong and Minwoo will never be that strong. Hyunseong and Minwoo might be two of his close friends since the first year of high school, but Kwangmin feels that they become much closer once that incident happens, and if it never happens, he will never realize that the only true friends he has, the friends who will stay beside him no matter what, are Hyunseong and Minwoo.

And the most important thing, if Youngmin doesn’t die, perhaps Kwangmin will just listen to his sibling’s words that restrain him to follow his old dream, becoming a pilot. That means he will never meet Bora at Haneda Airport and Youngkwang will never be born. Kwangmin truly loves those two and he can’t even imagine not having them in his life. Their smiles are his daily reminders to face every obstacle with optimism.

“If you fly so high, I’m afraid that I won’t be able to reach you.” Youngmin continues, pushing Kwangmin away from his reverie. Kwangmin stares longingly at Youngmin’s back, his mind is getting confused. Kwangmin can just pull Youngmin away from the parapet, preventing him to jump down. However, Kwangmin is not sure if that’s what he really wants to do right now.

Having Hyunseong, Minwoo, and Bora in his life is something that he’s thankful of. However, Kwangmin thinks that he can still survive without those three in his life. Just like after their high school graduation, Hyunseong and Minwoo won’t be by his side anymore, and yet, he will still live normally until thirty five years old, although he can’t avoid the fact that he will miss them so much.

Bora on the other hand, although he loves her so much, but realistically speaking, there’s always a chance that they will fall out of love and their marriage won’t work. There are so many proofs to support this hypothesis. From Hollywood celebrities to Kwangmin’s own neighbors, their relationships fall apart in the end. So maybe, just maybe, Kwangmin will also be survived without Bora in his life.

Youngkwang is the problem here. Kwangmin will never be survived for not having Youngkwang in his life. As selfish as it sounds, Kwangmin will actually trade everything, even his life, to see that kid grow up being happy. And that’s why, even though he knows that the world is cruel as , Kwangmin will always make sure that everything he does will never disappoint his child because he wants to provide him that happiness.

Feeling the intense stare, Youngmin takes a look at his brother over his shoulder. Kwangmin can’t miss the sadness in Youngmin’s beautiful eyes, and this makes him even more confused of what to do. “Unfortunately, although you’re not flying, although we are standing on the same ground right now, it seems like I still can’t reach you.”

Kwangmin thinks that Youngmin is totally wrong. Kwangmin will always be the one who will never be able to reach Youngmin. Even now, when he has the opportunity to just reach Youngmin, grabbing his hand and walking away together from this rooftop, his body stays still on its position because he finally gets that this is not just about Youngkwang, but this is also about his mom’s happiness.

Sure, Mrs. Jo will never have to go through that miserable part of her life when she finds out that one of her sons leaving her sooner than she has ever thought and her remaining son will be in coma for 42 days. But, Mrs. Jo’s heart will also remain empty without Mr. Lee fulfilling it with love. Perhaps she can still find another man to be her partner, but it’s still uncertain whether that other man will treat her as nice as Mr. Lee.

Besides that, Sungyeol’s happiness will also have to be taken away because since a long time ago, he always longs for an ideal mother figure, and he will easily get it in Mrs. Jo. If Mr. Lee doesn’t meet his mom, it’s very obscure whether that bubbly boy’s hope will ever come true or not. Kwangmin thinks that Sungyeol deserves to receive his happiness as well, getting that ideal mother figure, having Mrs. Jo as his own mother.

So basically, this is just like a Domino Effect. If one event is missing, the other events will never happen. If Youngmin doesn’t die, the happiness of everyone around him will be stolen.

“Thank God you finally realize.” Kwangmin is surprised to see his twin suddenly standing in front of him, a smile dancing upon his face. The smile is not a sad smile like Youngmin used to give him before, but more like a relieved smile, like there’s a burden on his shoulders that has been taken away. “I don’t know why you’re always so slow when you have to realize something important. It’s very tiring to create the exact same situation while giving some suggestions to your brain, you know.”

Kwangmin has no idea what is currently happening. Youngmin, or maybe not really Youngmin since he’s not even sure what is what or who is who right now, amusedly chuckles, then adds. “We are both here because I have a duty to make you realize that everything happens for a reason. My death is a part of God’s plan for you so that there’s a way for Him to bring a new happiness in your life and also in our mom’s life. So please, stop blaming yourself for everything that happened in the past and just let me go. Your show must go on even without me. You got it, little brother?”

Before Kwangmin can give a response, he feels a pair of lips on the crown of his head. Kwangmin’s vision turns black afterwards.

***

“Daddy, wake up.” Kwangmin abruptly opens his eyes when the familiar voice of Youngkwang slips into his ears. Kwangmin sees his kid standing beside his bed, little hands tightly holding a piece of paper. “Daddy, I draw this for you.” Youngkwang gives the paper to Kwangmin. There’s a picture of a boy with light hair that looks like Youngmin, and also looks like the older version of Youngkwang, wearing all white and having a pair of wings on his back.

Youngkwang points his index finger at the picture. “Well, although he kinda looks like me, it’s not me in that picture, by the way. It’s your angel that I want to draw. And if you still can’t find him, I hope this picture will help you ease your longing for him. I know it’s not that good, but I will try to draw better in the future.”

Kwangmin feels so touched knowing that his son really cares about his feeling. Kwangmin smiles widely at the little boy and ruffles his hair gently. “Thank you for your hard work, but I think I don’t need to find that angel anymore because I have found another angel.” Youngkwang pouts, thinking that the picture he has made will just become a waste. Noticing this, Kwangmin decides to add more. “In fact, he’s standing beside me right now.”

Youngkwang makes a funny face as he hears the cheesy words, yelling. “Argh, daddy, just stop it. It’s gross.” Kwangmin just laughs at his child’s cuteness and scoops him in his embrace afterwards. “Come on, young man. It’s almost seven already. Your mom will be mad if you don’t get ready by now.”

(Later, Kwangmin will send direct messages through Twitter to Hyunseong and Minwoo.

Hi, it’s me, Jo Kwangmin, your friend from high school. Do you remember me? It’s been a long time since the last time we talked to each other, how are you doing lately? I hope you’re doing fine. I really miss you though. I’m looking forward to hear from you soon.

These direct messages will be the new start of their old friendship.)

***

A/N: I had a discussion with someone about Causal Determinism Theory and that is actually the base of this story. From my understanding, Determinism Theory is basically a cause-and-effect theory, same goes with Domino Effect and Newton’s Third Law. Whether these theories are true or not, it’s not the point here, but the point is, in my opinion, these theories just want to tell us that we should try to accept everything that happens now and stop complaining because it’s all the consequences of our actions in the past. So yeah, because in The Plane Flies High it seems like Kwangmin can’t completely accept Youngmin’s death, in this story I want to change it. Anyway, thank you for reading, subscribing, and commenting this story. This is probably not my best work, but I hope you enjoy reading it. ^^