Hit me. Hit me with a bat. I mean, a baseball bat, of course. Not, like, an animal. That would be weird.

Can somebody please tell me why I'm still livi—

“Hey. Sunni. Sunni. Hey.”

After Mr. Kim introduced Chen (and the girls squealed loudly behind me), he kept bothering me and poking me in the arm. I glance over at Chen the Cashier Man, who won't stop bothering me until I do. It was a hard glance, that would hurt if it was a bat and it hit you in the face.

“Does Mr. Kim always talk this much? His skin is just flapping all over the place. How do you stand it?” he asks with a disgusted face.

That was rude. Not that I care.

I try not to roll my eyes (and fail) and look away. There is silence after Mr. Kim announced that it was time for silent study. After that, I continue the activity I involve myself in every morning in homeroom—waiting for someone to ask me for help. I think about that girl who asked me for help the other day. She isn't a new student, so how did I not notice her before? I snap out of my thoughts when a paper lands on my desk. I raise my eyebrow at it and look at Chen, who looks pretty casual and nonchalant with his silly hair and stupid, tacky uniform and dazzling smi—

Let's stop this right here.

I open the stupid lined paper and peek at the note uninterestedly.

Can you solve this problem for me? I'm too lazy to do it. Thx babycakes. Xoxo

f(x) = (2x+1)⁷(3x+1)⁵

Your love, Chen ♥

No. Go home. Seriously. Who even are you.

Whatever. This is what I'm here for.

f'(x) = 7(2x+1)⁶(2)(3x+1)⁵+5(3x+1)⁴(3)(2x+1)⁷

Do your own work.

In the end, I decided not to comment on the whole “babycakes” thing. I toss the paper back to his desk and he opens it excitedly, picking up his pencil and totally copying the answer down into his book. Silly guy. Mr. Kim only gives credit if you show all your work. I take out my notebook and doodle on a random page. I sit there for a couple minutes before that stupid piece of paper has the nerve to show up on my desk again.

Hey don't be like that. I said thanks.

I can't believe this guy. WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS?

I respond in the only way I can think of.

And I did your stupid problem.

But babyyyyy

Oh and you're not my love. I don't even know you.

Yes you do. We're friends. :)

Ok you go ahead and think that.

I will. ♥

I roll my eyes and toss the paper back to his desk without writing anything on it. I'm so done with him. You can't talk to the future ruler of the world like that... and not get killed. And, if I could kill him and not get in trouble for it, maybe I would consider it. I don't want my family to have to bail me out of jail because of some kid who couldn't keep his stupid thoughts to himself.

–

At lunch, I decide to sit outside because it's a lovely day. I mean, the birds were singing, the sun was shining, and there's not one single (or taken) person here to ruin it. I sit down in the middle of the grass and put my lunch (a thermos full of ramyun and a bottle of water) down in front of me, flattening the grass under it in the process. I lie down in the tall, dark green grass. Gee, I sure like the world without a ton of people. I close my eyes and hum softly to myself, lying completely still with my limbs outstretched.

I start singing one of my favorite songs—Restless Heart by Matt Hires. “Hey, you've got a restless heart beating out, out, out, out on your sleeve, and I won't let this fire start—ow!” I open my eyes and cradled my left arm, glaring up at the person who “accidentally” stepped on it. I remove the glare from my face when I see that nameless girl who asked me to help her with her homework.

“I'm so so sorry!” She quickly bends down next to me and holds my arm next to her face, examining it ever so gently.

“It's okay,” I say.

NOT. GEEZ THAT FREAKING HURT YOU DUMBO.

She stops examining my arm and looks at me before bowing profusely. I hold her shoulder to keep her from bowing for the 15^th time. “It's really okay.”

“I'm so sorry,” she says and bows her head down. I roll my eyes.

People these days.

…..............................

silence.

“So,” I say, reaching out to someone here for the first time. She doesn't seem too bad (other than her left eye being a little to big for her right eye, her overbite, and her dry hair), so maybe this time it'll be okay. Hopefully she doesn't just become obsessed with me like everyone else.

“Huh?” She looks up at me with wide eyes, probably shocked at how hot I am. She looks pretty scared, like I'm about to eat her or something.

“What?” I ask.

She shifts uncomfortably and kneels with her back straight. “Nothing... I just didn't think you would talk to me. I mean, you don't really talk.”

Wow. So this is what you people think of me.

“Um... okay...”

“You don't know me, though, do you?” She looks a little disappointed at the thought.

I nod awkwardly and look away, avoiding eye contact. “Nope.”

“Well, I guess I didn't make a very good first impression, did I?” she whispers, probably more to herself than me, and looks away. “Um,” she looks back at me. “I'm Minji.” She reaches her hand out, probably to shake mine.

Heck naw your hand is probably all germy. I still haven't eaten my lunch. So, unless you have some hand sanitizer or something—

I shake her hand slowly, eying our hands. Back in Busan, I was really friendly, but when I moved to Seoul, I kind of closed myself off. This is really the first time in a long time that I've met someone new who's not horrible and I can actually stand.

It's kind of nice.

Just as I begin to smile, a hand lands on my shoulder from behind.

RUINING THE MOMENT YO

I look back at who the perpetrator is, and find FREAKING CASHIER DUDE. I CAME OUT HERE TO GET AWAY FROM YOU. “Hey! Is there a party goin' on here? Why was I not invited?” He pouts, looking totally adora—

I didn't finish. You can't hold it against me.

Why were you not invited? PROBABLY BECAUSE I DON 'T EVEN KNOW YOU.

“Um, sorry?” I roll my eyes and look back to Minji, making a derpy face, trying to tell her to get him out of here.

“Oh.” She blushes and looks down.

GURL OH NO YOU DI'IN'T. WHAT YOU BEIN ALL BASHFUL FOR?

“You can join us if you want.”

NO. NO YOU CAN'T. WHAT ARE YOU SAYING MINJI.

I make a “WHAT ARE YOU SAYING” face at her, to which she just SHRUGS. REAL helpful, gurl. REAAAAAAL helpful. “Um...” I rack my brain for anything to say. Blank. Crap.

“Why, thank you, little miss Minji.” Chen smiles charmingly at her. She blushes. SHE'S CHARMED.

Okay. I'm dead. I've died. We can't be friends.

Chen sits down across from Minji and next to me, SO CLOSE that our THIGHS are TOUCHING. GET AWAY FROM MEEEE. YOU SMELL GOOD BUT I DON'T KNOW YOU. I don't move, though. I could still probably use him as my evil henchman that I use to conquer Seoul in the future. Watch out. It's gonna happen. Or maybe I just don't want to move.

No, yeah. I do.

I scoot slightly away, picking up my water and taking off the cap. I down almost half the bottle in one go, probably surprising Minji and Chen with the fact that someone so hot can drink so fast. I pull the bottle away from my face and look at them looking at me. “What?”

“Oh, you thirsty, babycakes?” Chen winks at me and I try my hardest not to punch him in the kidney. I blink and look at Minji, giving her a slightly peeved look, but she was too busy STARING DREAMILY at Mr. Cashier Pants.

Okay, I think she might swoon if I don't do something.

We all sit there, me looking at Minji awkwardly, Chen probably trying to hit on me (which I gather from his excessive winking and suggestive eyebrow movements), and Minji just CONTINUING TO STARE DREAMILY AT CHEN. Is this an already-developing love triangle? Not cool. Nasty. I might throw up.

“Okay, well, I'm gonna go...” I say and stand up, retrieving my thermos and water bottle cap from the grass. “So, you two have fun.” I walk away, hopefully looking pretty epic.

One or both of them might have followed me—I'm not sure, 'cause I didn't look—but I just kept walking back to the classroom, trying to ignore everything and everyone.

This situation does not bode well for Yoo Sunni.