I really didn't know how to express it to Sunny. It was not that I was unhappy being with her. I was really happy. But that's what made this feeling even worse. I was too happy being with her that one day I would lose her. Someday I would grow old, or something might change my personality, so what if she didn't like me anymore the way she liked me now? 

I couldn't imagine Sunny leaving me. I was really really scared even just by the thought of it. Just how long would my love and Sunny last? How long could I make sure that she was mine? I knew a lot of people would probably think I was just overthinking it. I'd tried to erase it from my mind, but as Sunny showed her love day by day, the thought came back again and again. 

So yesterday after I kissed her, I asked her the question. She was taken aback, I guessed. I didn't want her to think I was being possesive. Even though I really was possesive. I wanted Sunny to be mine only and forever. Was I being selfish again? Sunny just stayed silent after my sudden question and we didn't talk about it anymore until the end of the day. 

I woke up the next day with a complicated mind. Afraid that Sunny would break up with me on that day. Or Sunny would just laugh it off and think that I'd been worried of was not a serious matter. I didn't know. All I knew was that I woke up to her absence around the dorm. Maknae Seohyun greeted me instead. 

"Unnie, good morning" She said from behind the door. 

"Morning, Seohyun" I smiled to her. "What brought you here early in the morning?"

"Sunny unnie asked me to remind you to check your phone as soon as you wake up" Seohyun said. "She didn't say why though"

I gulped. If Sunny asked that, it must be something serious. My hands started trembling as I said thank you to Seohyun and grabbed my phone on the side of my bed. Could it be that Sunny wanted to break up with me? No, no, Sunny, please don't. I can't imagine if...

When I opened the message, my heart started beating faster.

'We need to talk'. That's what she said. 'Let's meet tonight after I finish my radio at 7, I'll send the place later'.

Good job on screwing up, Kim Taeyeon, now she must be wanting to break up with you because you're such an overthinking possesive psychotic girlfriend. I bumped my head on my pillow and started crying. I shouldn't have told her about my feelings. This time everything would end. 

I waited impatiently for 6 PM to come and then got myself prepared for the meeting. I decided to wear a rather semi-formal dress. This could be our last date, and it must end beautifully, I thought. Sunny had texted me the address of the place earlier so I quickly got into my car and drove it there. 

When I arrived at the place, I found that it was a very romantic restaurant. I got off my car and saw a Western-themed cafe surrounded by yellow lights and trees. There were not too many people around. The romantic music coming from the performing singer on the cafe stage was the only sound crowding it. 

I took a step on the first stair of the cafe and got shocked a little bit when a waitress approached me. 

"Sorry, are you  Miss Kim Taeyeon?" She asked.

"Yes, I am" I wonder if Sunny had told her I'd come here.

"Ah, Miss Sunny told you'd be coming. She also asked me to inform you that you should go there, at the other garden of the cafe" She pointed on a certain direction behind another gate at the corner of the room.

"I see. Thank you so much" I bowed to her and left.

Why should Sunny being so gentleman and romantic even at this condition? Sunny, please don't do anything like this anymore. I won't be able to take it if it's really ending today and I must accept the fact that there'll be nothing more like this in my future. 

Nevertheless, I dared myself walking to the direction the waitress had told me. I followed the stone paths on the ground. My eyes glued on every step I took as I couldn't imagine facing Sunny's eyes on me. When I reached the ending of the path and lifted my face up, I saw nothing but a beautiful small hut.

It wasn't an ugly hut. Inside it there were more beautiful yellow lights. I stepped inside and was welcomed by a cute tiny sofa, but enough for two persons, with cute dolls on it. I touched the dolls and played with them for a few second before I noticed there was a glass table in front of the sofa. I could immediate spot so many kinds of toys on it. Puzzles, drawing book, crayons and color pencils, and tiny miniatures of my favorite cartoon characters. Nearby the table I found a small drawer full of yet another cute stuffs. And in the middle of it I found a picture.

It was a picture of me and her at one of the food stalls in Japan. It was taken on our first secret date. It was three years ago. I always kept the memories in my mind and never did I expect Sunny to still have the pictures. My eyes started forming tears as I looked at the image of us, smiling and cuddling very closely. 

I couldn't help but staring and playing with those toys and for a moment forgetting the fact that I was going to have my last date with Sunny. Wait, it couldn't be Sunny who prepared all these stuffs right? Why would she put so much effort on just a simple break-up speech? 

Just when I was still indulged in my negative thoughts session, a pair of warm arms lingered on my waist. I didn't have to look back to know who's the owner of the arms. I stood there frozen, didn't expect her to come out this way. What's the meaning of all these?

"Welcome to our small miniature house" She said followed by some giggles. "Do you like it so far?"

I wanted to answer, but somehow something held my voice from coming out. It's an unexplainable warm but yet strong feelings at the bottom of my heart. 

"Hey.." She teased me a bit by tickling my stomach. "You don't like it?"

"I.." In the end, I couldn't stand it anymore and my tears poured out. "I don't know what to say"

She took a while before answering. "Well, let's go to our kitchen then"

She gently held my hands and brought me to the other side of the hut, revealing a small wooden dining table in the middle. Even with my wet eyes I could still clearly see the food and drinks, all of them were my favorite ones. 

"Sit down here, princess" She took one of the chairs for me. I looked at her hesitantly before following her order. 

She took the other chair, which was on the opposite of me, and started slicing and picking the food for me. She put them on my plate and smiled widely. 

"Thank you for the food!" She said with a bright face and ate her own food on her plate.

Again, I was hesitant before I started eating, too. Until we finished our dinner all I could do was munching my food while staring at her. She didn't say a word to me as she gulped down all the meats and juice. 

"That was delicious, right?" She contiinued after finishing the last drip of the orange juice. 

"Y- Yeah" That's all I could say. I had just finished my last bite of meats too and was drinking my orange juice now. When I put my glass down back on the table, I found Sunny staring at me.

Her eyes were serious, yet excited, yet nervous. I had to wait for a minute or so before I got to hear what she wanted to say.

"Taeyeon-ah I wanna say something" 

I gulped.

"I.. I may not know what are exactly in your mind and heart, but I know what you've been feeling these days. And I understand" She continued as her face turned frustrated. "Taeyeon, I'm sorry I can't always be the best for you"

When she said that, I immediately took her hands and grabbed it tightly. "No, what are you saying? You've always been the best for me"

She held my our hands together tighter before continuing. "Taeyeon, listen. I may not always be the best for you, but I can promise you for the rest of my life, that I will try my best loving you. I can promise you that whatever happens in our life, I won't leave you. You'll always have me. I know these words probably won't do much to help you feel better but.."

She took her hands from me and put it inside her pants' pocket, looking for something. After a few seconds she pulled out a red box and opened it. I already cried more even before she opened what was inside.

She took the small, golden ring with a diamond pendant on it. She closed the box, showed the ring right in front of my face. Only then I had noticed she had cried too, but then she smiled in the middle of her tears.

"I know, this isn't a marriage proposal. If only things were possible for us to get married right now. Maybe it isn't right now, but.. Anyway, Kim Taeyeon. With this ring I declare to you that I'll always love you, be with you through thick and thin, and take care of you"

I didn't know what to say. Both of us didn't know what to say after she finished that sentence. She just slowly took my ring finger and carefully slipped the ring into it. She laughed again in the middle of her sobs. 

"This looks stupid right. I don't even know if I'm doing the right thing. I wish.. I really really wish this will erase your doubts, your worries, your sadness, and everything. But I don't know if I'm doing good enough. I.."

I didn't let her finish her sentence. I just pulled her head with my hands and crashed my lips onto hers. 

"You.." I stopped our kisses for a brief moment. "You are indescribable"

I kissed her again. I wanted to show her how much I was grateful. These kisses would probably never be enough to convey what I felt for her. 

"So.." She stopped our kisses again. "Tell me if I'm doing the right thing"

I just smiled. "You've erased everything from my mind. Doubtness, worries, everything. Until I have nothing to think about but you"

"Well" She gave me a victorious smile. "I guess you'll have to stuck with me for the rest of your life"

I laughed and leaned closer to her again. "I'm more than willing to do that"

And with that, I locked our lips once more as if our night would never end.

And she had made me believe since then, that it would never end, indeed.