a/n: Hello everyone! Please note this chapter is only half edited, but I felt bad for waiting so long to post. Please excuse poor descriptions and clumsy character inconsistencies.

Part Two

Junmyeon was surprised. Despite Exo’s reputation, the people around him were…

Ahead of him, Yifan tripped over his own feat, causing the whole pack to collide into each other as they screeched to a halt.

Junmyeon sighed internally as he picked himself up. They were all complete dorks.

“Hey! What kind of alpha are you, that you can’t even walk three feet without tripping?” Luhan yipped at him from the side.

“He’s still getting used to his size,” a younger subordinate named Yixing said wisely. “He’s still growing into his body.”

Yifan brushed them both off and began jogging forward at a dignified pace again, leaving the rest of the pack to pick themselves off of each other and follow him.

Yixing came to jog by Junmyeon’s side at the back of the pack. “Why don’t you run up with the rest of us?”

“It isn’t my place.”

“What do you mean?” Yixing tilted his head to the side, and Junmyeon gave him an incredulous look.

“I’m not a part of the pack yet, how can I run alongside the rest of you?”

Yixing blinked at him in confusion. “But you’re basically a part of the pack.”

“Didn’t Alpha say that I’ll be tested once we get back to your territory?”

“You can call him Yifan. None of us refer to him as ‘Alpha’.”

“Again, Yixing, it’s not my place.”

“Because you aren’t part of the pack?”

“No. Because no matter what, he will always be of higher rank than I am.”

Yixing shook his head. “I don’t get it.”

“What don’t you understand about pack dynamics?” Junmyeon’s voice dipped down into an irritated growl.

Yixing shook his head again, but backed off. “Well, just don’t fall behind, alright? We can’t have you getting lost.”

“I won’t fall behind.” Junmyeon had a brief sense of déjà vu, but then realized that there was no stinging shame from Yixing’s words.

“Alright then.” Yixing quickened his steps and joined the rest of his pack, leaving Junmyeon to trail after him.

Junmyeon stared at the naïve wolf running ahead of him in wonder.

How odd this pack is. Don’t they have a hierarchy?

Not long after Yixing had left him alone, Luhan fell back to run by his side.

“Beta.”

“Please call me Luhan, Junmyeon. None of us call each other by our role in this pack.”

“Not even Alpha?”

Luhan panted softly as their footsteps flowed over the earth. “Not even Yifan.”

“I don’t understand. Why don’t you do that? Isn’t it disrespectful not to address each other with your roles?”

Luhan nudged his shoulder gently as the pack slowed down ahead of them, gently bringing down the pace of Junmyeon’s footsteps. “Every pack is different. I don’t know where you lived before, but we are a small pack. We’re all so close, we simply call each other by name. We don’t need to voice what our positions are, because we know them without being told.”

Junmyeon blinked at him. “Doesn’t that mean that I should refer to you by position then? Since I’m not close with any of you?”

“Junmyeon, we’re trying to welcome you into the pack. If you want to try and be part of the group, you have to try and fit into our way of life. One of those ways is calling each other by name. I’ll punish you if I hear you refer to anyone by their station if I have to. I don’t know what kind of circumstances you came out of before, Junmyeon, but here Exo is a family. We take care of each other, we love each other, and we share deep, deep bonds with each other. The first step to joining our family is to call everyone by name. You chose to join our pack. It’s your duty and responsibility to try and fit yourself into our pack order.”

Junmyeon hung his head in shame, his tail and ears drooping underneath Luhan’s scolding. “I’m sorry. I understand now. I’ll try harder.”

“You’ll try harder…?”

Junmyeon swallowed hard and forced the name past his lips. “Luhan.”

Luhan yipped cheerfully and bowled Junmyeon over, playfully at his face. “That’s the spirit! Keep trying hard, Junmyeon!”

Junmyeon basked under the attention of his packmate. It felt nice to be receiving affection from someone without it drawing immense jealousy or attention from the rest of the pack.

Not like with Alpha, his heart whispered.

Junmyeon sighed and gently shut his heart away; he had to forget his old pack life if Exo was truly going to accept him. Besides, there was the chance that he wouldn’t pass the test to join the pack, and that he was going to die anyways.

Junmyeon briefly wondered what he seemed like in the other pack member’s eyes; he’d boldly requested to join the pack, but once they’d accepted, he’d suddenly shyly withdrawn.

Junmyeon was so lost in his thoughts that he yelped when he crashed muzzle-first into Chanyeol’s ribs. Chanyeol yelped and rolled over, bringing Junmyeon on top of him so that the smaller wolf wouldn’t be crushed.

On the other hand, Junmyeon didn’t notice how Chanyeol had carefully maneuvered them and he panicked, quickly leaping off of the other wolf and nudging his face in distress. “I’m so sorry, Chanyeol! I didn’t mean to hit you!”

Chanyeol nudged Junmyeon affectionately in return as he got to his feet. “I’m fine. Are you ok?”

“I-I’m alright.”

“Honestly, you should be worried about yourself, Junmyeon. Chanyeol’s three times as large and three times as heavy as you are,” Luhan teased lightly.

Nevertheless, Junmyeon’s head and tail drooped sadly.

At that moment, Yifan came over in human form. “What’re you guys doing? We’re here.” Then, he noticed Junmyeon drooping sadly and crouched down by the grey wolf.

Junmyeon didn’t anticipate what happened next at all.

“Aw, look at him he’s adorable!” Yifan smiled and reached out to pet Junmyeon’s flank. “How are you resisting the cuteness Chanyeol?” Junmyeon froze at the feeling of Yifan’s warm hands on top of his fur; was he allowed to be this familiar with his alpha? What should he do, what should he do, what should he do?

“I wasn’t, until you came along and destroyed it all with your scary face,” Chanyeol deadpanned. “Hey, Yifan. Get off him, can’t you see he’s scared?”

“Huh?” Yifan looked down at the young wolf underneath his arms and blinked in surprise when he realized that Junmyeon was trembling. “Oh. Sorry Junmyeon.” He moved off to the side and then reached out from a safe distance to pet Junmyeon’s neck. “My bad.”

Junmyeon blinked at him, and then turned back to his human form. “It’s alright.”

The rest of the pack had wandered off, some choosing to stay wolves while others had also turned back into humans.

Luhan sprang up to his full height beside Junmyeon. “Alpha, explain what you meant by ‘here’ to Junmyeon, ok? I’m going to hunt with Sehun.”

“Make sure you guys actually hunt, and don’t ‘forget’ like last time,” Yifan snickered.

 Luhan flushed bright red. “It won’t happen again! We both promised!”

“Uh huh,” Yifan chuckled. “Ok, go hunting with Sehun, Luhan. Try and get back soon, alright?”

“We will.”

Junmyeon watched Luhan shrink back into his wolf form and wrap himself around Sehun’s ankles, more like a cat than anything else. He observed Sehun’s happy laugh as he tried to get Luhan to let go of him for a few moments before turning to Yifan again.

So far, it didn’t seem like anyone was mad at him for trying to hold the alpha’s attention. Maybe Luhan wasn’t trying to screw him over, and they really were all that close, and it didn’t matter if their alpha was unmated, and that they really all understood each other without having to say anything. It was strange to face such simple kindness after having been raised for years in a web of schemes and cunning from his former pack.

“Yi—Alpha?” Junmyeon changed his mind at the last moment. He was still too afraid to address Yifan by anything else.

“You can call me Yifan.”

“I’ll try.”

Yifan ruffled Junmyeon’s hair affectionately. “Oh yeah—I said we’re here. This forest clearing isn’t actually where we live, we own a house in Incheon under my name. But for now, we’ll rest here before we continue onwards.”

“Will I get tested here?”

“Yes, you will be.”

“How long are you going to be staying here?”

“Not more than a single day.” Yifan frowned and smoothed a lock of hair off of Junmyeon’s forehead with his broad thumb. “You’re very odd. You boldly came up and joined the pack, but now you talk as if you won’t really be accepted as one of us.”

“Do you think I’ll be accepted?”

“You have a great potential, Junmyeon. I think it’s more likely than not that you can truly become one with the rest of us.”

Junmyeon smiled tentatively at him, and relaxed when Yifan smiled back.

“Oh…um, what did you mean earlier, about Sehun and Luhan?”

“Sehun and Luhan are mates.”

Junmyeon tilted his head in confusion, and Yifan’s face turned red. “If you don’t know how mating works, I’m not going to explain it to you.”

“Oh!”  Understanding dawned on Junmyeon’s face and he laughed. “I’m sorry, I get it now.”

Yifan awkwardly scratched at the back of his neck and turned away. “Go mingle with the other wolves. Get to know everyone. I don’t want there to be too much unrest if you officially join the pack.”

“Ok.” Junmyeon hesitantly padded forward, turning his head back to look uncertainly at Yifan.

“Go on.” Yifan gave him an encouraging nod of his head. “They want to make friends with you, trust me.”

Junmyeon gave him a soft smile and turned away to join Minseok and Jongdae near the edge of the clearing. He’d been drawn to Jongdae’s kittenish smile from the first time he’d seen him, and Minseok was also very kind and calming—a perfect counterpoint to Jongdae’s vivacious personality.

Junmyeon watched Yifan melt into the darkness behind Jongdae’s thin shoulders before turning his attention back to his two packmates. His alpha seemed like a very kind man, and Junmyeon was interested in getting to know him further, despite everything that had happened to him.

That night, Junmyeon couldn’t fall asleep. Too many thoughts were rolling around in his head as he stared at the stars with wide-eyes.

He still wanted to die. His heart hurt immensely from the betrayal of his pack, and from the thought of a happy life with his former alpha. However, meeting, befriending, and bonding with the members of Exo had brought him such great joy, Junmyeon was beginning to doubt his conviction to die.

However, it was going to take more than a few days and eleven wolves to fully heal his heart. Junmyeon shifted restlessly for a few more minutes, his heart and mind running in endless circles as he tried to pin down his true desire: to live, or to die.

Junmyeon listened to the soft shuffles of the pack moving around in their sleep for a few minutes before he quietly got to his feet and slipped out of the clearing, his grey pelt glowing dully under the moonlight. He didn’t plan on wandering far from the clearing—he just wanted to run around a bit and clear his head before he could try and sleep. Yifan rolled over and watched Junmyeon slip off into the darkness.

Luhan stirred by his side. “Is he gone?” The wolf’s voice was raspy from sleep.

“Yeah.”

“Do you think he’s leaving us for good?”

“He’s too obedient. I doubt it.”

“He seemed skittish.”

“He seemed like a mix of a whole bunch of things.” Yifan yawned wearily and stumbled to his feet, gently nudging Luhan to his feet as well. “Wake everyone up, we need to face him when he returns.”

Minseok yawned blearily as he got to his feet, and then woke Jongdae up by playfully whacking him across the nose with his fluffy tail. “Do you think it’ll work?” He pointedly ignored Jongdae’s sputter as he woke up to a nose full of fur.

“We saw that he had the potential in him.” Yifan sat erect in the center of the clearing, and he gently gestured for the pack to come sit with him. “We’ll have to wait until he returns to find out.”

While the pack was settling in to wait for his return, Junmyeon continued to lope quietly through the forest, his feet barely making any noise as they glided over the dry underbrush of the woods. The running wasn’t helping to clear his mind—if anything, Junmyeon was getting more and more conflicted over his will to live or to die. At last, he stopped running and stood still, his breath coming out in heavy pants as his body trembled from the force of his breathing.

He was seized by a sudden desire to see the moon, but the branches of the forest trees blocked out most of the night sky. He noticed that the trees were thinner up ahead, and he moved forward in the hopes of finding a clearer view of the sky, eventually reaching a small forest clearing. Junmyeon glanced up at the sky, but then glanced back at the clearing, his brow furrowed. In the center of the small enclosure was a large, flat rounded stone. Junmyeon transformed from his wolf form to his human form, and the sound of his footsteps crunching through the dead leaves rattled through the quiet forest.

Junmyeon stopped at the edge of the stone and gently traced its edges with his fingers. The stone had been engraved into twelve equal sections, and at the top of each section was a symbol followed by writing. Unfortunately, Junmyeon couldn’t read—his pack lived out in the wild, and only a few of the wolves went into the city, and hence had a need for literacy. Junmyeon frowned curiously when he saw that one of the sections only had a symbol and no messy script beneath it. He walked around to the edge of the section and then reached out to feel the smooth stone beneath his fingertips.

He felt loneliness tugging at his heart as he sat on the edge of the stone and stared up at the moon. He briefly envisioned what his old pack might be doing; they were probably all huddled up, keeping each other warm beneath the clear night sky. Junmyeon felt his heart throb as he thought of his former alpha, and the brief glimpse of happiness that he’d offered him.

Junmyeon was drawn from his thoughts by a strange feeling. He frowned and looked down at the section of the stone he was sitting on, only to shriek in surprise when he realized that deep scratch marks were appearing in the stone by his hands. He hastily drew his hands back and leapt away, his breath coming out in erratic gasps from his chest when he realized that now, the sector of the stone with the water droplet on it now had a series of scratches underneath it. A tingling sensation worked its way up through his whole body and then vanished, leaving Junmyeon with an itchy feeling. He scratched at his shoulders and shivered fiercely for a moment before he turned around and dashed out of the clearing—he wasn’t sure what had happened, and he could only hope that he hadn’t done something extremely terrible.

He was surprised to find the entire pack waiting for him, sitting in patiently in a line with Yifan at the center.

“Where were you?”

“I couldn’t sleep. I went out running.” Junmyeon tried to slow his rapidly beating heart; did they know what he’d done? Did they know what it meant?

“Did you find the stone?”

“The…stone?” They know. Junmyeon felt the edge of anticipation sink its teeth into his soul.

“A stone divided into twelve sections with twelve symbols and eleven names. Did you find it?”

“Names?” Junmyeon frowned. “Is that what those scratches were?”

It was Yifan’s turn to frown. “You can’t read?”

“I never had the opportunity to learn.”

“Did you find the stone, or not, Junmyeon?” Luhan’s voice cut through their conversation as he gently reminded Yifan to stay on task.

“I did.”

“Did anything happen?”

“I was sitting by the stone when scratches appeared under the droplet symbol. I don’t know what it meant though.”

“Did you feel an itchy, tingling sort of feeling afterwards?”

“Yes.”

Yifan turned to the rest of the pack. “He was compatible.”

“Does that mean he’s one of us?” Tao growled from the back, and Junmyeon felt apprehensive as he remembered how Tao had threatened to kill him at their first meeting.

“It does. We’ve found our twelfth member.”

Junmyeon watched the pack with growing curiosity. What were they talking about?

Yifan turned back to Junmyeon. “Do you remember how I said that you would be tested here?”

“Yes,” Junmyeon said cautiously. “Was…was that the test?”

“Yes. You passed, Junmyeon—welcome to Exo.”

Instead of feeling elated, Junmyeon felt like someone had punched him in the gut.

No! I want to die, I want to die, don’t make me live, please!

“Whoa, he’s freaking out again,” Junmyeon heard someone mutter softly. “Yixing, do something.”

“I don’t know how to stop panic attacks!”

“, he’s going to hurt someone if he gets out of control, it’s already coming—“

“You idiots, someone just knock him out before we all drown!”

Junmyeon was struggling to stay conscious—his vision was blurring and his ears were filled with a distant roaring noise. He was vaguely aware that he’d transformed back into his wolf, and now Yifan was on top of him, shaking him harshly.

He kicked his leg feebly, trying to get Yifan’s heavy body weight off of him, when a sharp pain blossomed in his head and everything went black.

Junmyeon woke up with a dull ache at the base of his neck. He groaned slightly as he opened his eyes, only to shut them tightly as light pierced his senses.

“You’re awake?” Yixing’s voice came from his right, and Junmyeon grunted in response.

“How do you feel?”

“…My head hurts…”

Yixing placed his cool hands on Junmyeon’s forehead, and a few moments later, the dull ache settled down into a mild throbbing. “Does it hurt anywhere else?”

Junmyeon shook his head softly. Just my heart. He vaguely wondered what Yixing had done to make his headache away, but then brushed off the thought.

“You gave us a big scare back there,” Yixing said softly as he sat back by Junmyeon’s bedside. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Junmyeon shook his head again.

“If you’re sure. You can always come talk to me if you change your mind.” Yixing got up from his chair by Junmyeon’s bed and moved towards the door. “Yifan is going to come in and talk to you in a minute, alright?”

Junmyeon nodded and slowly sat up in the bed. He gazed around the room and frowned in confusion; where was he? How long had he been out?

Most importantly, what was going to happen now? Junmyeon briefly considered the thought that Exo still might kill him for whatever had happened back in the forest, but then dismissed the thought. If they wanted to kill him, he would be dead by now.

Junmyeon sighed and pulled his body out from underneath the sheets, swinging his legs over the mattress so that he was perched on the side of the bed. At the moment, Yifan came in through the open door.

“Junmyeon.” Yifan paused politely on the threshold of the room for a moment before stepping in.

Junmyeon sat up straighter and clasped his hands tightly in his lap. “You wished to speak with me?”

“Yes.” Yifan came over and sat down beside Junmyeon. “There are a few things that we need to talk about. First of all, you’ve been accepted into Exo. However, you seemed to reject that acceptance. Would you care to explain yourself?”

“I-I…”

“What is it? Have we not been good to you? You came up to us and asked to join us, and then you panicked and nearly killed the entire pack back in the forest. Think of all of the people who failed the test to join us and were killed—you passed, and yet you reacted so negatively. What are you trying to achieve, Junmyeon?”

“I’m sorry.” Junmyeon bowed his head in shame. “I just—I just panicked.”

“Why?”

“I.” Junmyeon hesitated for a moment, and then decided to go ahead. “I wasn’t sure if I wanted to join the pack.”

“What do you mean?”

“I initially approached you all because I was looking for a way to die,” Junmyeon said softly. “I was hoping that you would flat out kill me, just like you had every other person before me. Imagine my surprise when you stopped Tao and said that I had a chance to join the pack.” Junmyeon chuckled bitterly and looked down at his hands, which had moved to clench tightly in the bed sheets. “I stayed with you, because I assumed that I wouldn’t pass the test. And now, here I am, stuck with my desire to die, but also with a desire to live.”

Yifan reached over and carefully disentangled one of Junmyeon’s hands from the bed sheets, gently covering Junmyeon’s tiny hand with his own. “Why did you think you wouldn’t pass?”

“I’m nothing special. I can’t hunt or fight very well, and neither my wolf form nor human form are terribly appealing. My former pack made very sure that I am aware of my own shortcomings.”

Yifan squawked in indignation. “What are you talking about? Have you ever seen yourself, Junmyeon?”

“Yes.” Junmyeon sighed and gently pulled his hand out of Yifan’s grasp. “I agreed with them for the most part.”

Yifan stared at him. “So you have no idea how beautiful you are?”

“I’m not beautiful,” Junmyeon snapped, suddenly angry. Only his old alpha had ever said that to him—and then he’d thrown him out, thrown him away, and Junmyeon didn’t want Yifan to see the pain that he was holding inside.

“But you are, Junmyeon! You truly are.” Yifan eyed him closely, but Junmyeon stubbornly stared straight ahead, refusing to look Yifan in the eye and give him a clue as to what was on his mind. At last, Yifan sighed deeply and looked away.

“Well, whether you believe me or not, you are still the twelfth member of our pack. We won’t let you die now, you understand that, right?”

Junmyeon’s lips thinned, and he gave no response.

Yifan hadn’t expected one, and continued speaking after a moment. “Since you’re part of the pack now, there are things you need to do, and that you need to learn. You said that you used to live out in a rural area—well, Exo lives in the city. You are currently in the house we live in, which is kept under my name. We never assume our wolf forms here. It is also necessary that you learn how to read so that you can be safe when you go outside.”

“You don’t assume your wolf forms here?” Junmyeon frowned; with his old pack, they had mostly lived in their wolf forms, hiding out in the forests surrounding a group of rural villages.

“Sometimes we do inside the house, but only rarely. Instead, once every month we head out to the countryside and change there and enjoy ourselves. If we have time, we head out and stay longer.”

Junmyeon pursed his lips; well, it seemed like he was going to have to deal with a lot of changes in his lifestyle. “Aren’t you worried someone will invade your territory while you’re away?”

Yifan chuckled. “We’re Exo. No one wants to mess with us. Besides, even if they tried, we’ve formed treaties with other inner-city packs who also undergo similar rituals at different times of the month. We look out for each other here.”

“Ok.”

“I also have to mark you into the pack since you weren’t born into the group.”

“What?” Junmyeon flinched away from Yifan, and Yifan held his hands up in a sign of peace.

“For wolves who aren’t born into a group, the alpha of the group has to mark them. You were born into your old pack, so you don’t bear your alpha’s mark. However, since no one was born into Exo, every wolf here bears my mark.”

“Are you going to bite me now?”

“We can wait for a better time.”

Junmyeon relaxed, and Yifan gave him a comforting smile.

“What else do you need to do?”

“We also need to talk about what happened in the forest.” Yifan’s gaze suddenly turned dark and serious, and Junmyeon cringed away in shame.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know what you were doing. But you need to learn and understand what the significance of your finding that stone was, and what you gained from it. For that, we’ll have a pack meeting later today, alright?”

Junmyeon nodded, but his shoulders were still slumped with shame and embarrassment.

Yifan reached over and patted his head soothingly, running his fingers through the soft strands of Junmyeon’s hair. “Don’t feel guilty.”

“How can I not feel guilty?”

“You didn’t do it on purpose, did you?”

“No…”

“Then it’s alright. We all understand.”

“I still don’t understand what happened. You keep saying that I nearly killed everyone, but…what did I do? What happened? It was all so vague.”

“You’ll find out later.”

“Does it have anything to do with Yixing taking my headache away?”

Yifan smiled at him. “It might.” He got up from the bed and ruffled Junmyeon’s hair one last time before letting go. “There’s food in the kitchen if you want to come eat.”

“Alright.” Junmyeon dutifully got off of the bed and walked out of the room, leaving Yifan to gaze after him thoughtfully.

What made you like this?

Why don’t you love yourself, even the tiniest bit?

a/n: Well, I hope you guys enjoyed! This chapter was a pain to write and (half) edit. Again, my apologies for clumsiness ;A; Please comment, and upvote and subscribe if you're enjoying so far!